miss c
01-09-2007, 11:06 PM
I don't know what to do or where to go. I keep comming back to the thought that "there's something wrong with me". To kind of sum it up because of lack of time, I:
-talk to, "touch", and fully interact with people who aren't really there.. and this happens mostly all the time, even in school or when other people are around, although I try to hide it when others are there
-have in the past acted on very risky impulses that ended up completely screwing up my relationship with my parents, my reputation in our town, and my own views on myself and people around me
-when it comes to relationships, my moods tend to swing very drastically from loving and happy, to then anger, confusion, and depression when the relationship comes to an end, like the flip of a switch. I'm know to "overreact" and "go psycho" when a relationship ends
-get impulses to lie to make things seem more interesting, so that I have something to talk about and other people will be interested in me. I have exaggerated illnesses, lied about my past, and lied about things I've said just to get the kind of attention I want.
Some of the things I have mentioned may be irrelevant, but I just figured I might as well add them. I don't have enough time to really elaborate, and if anyone actually reads this and responds, I'll get more into detail rather than waste my time now.
Also, I'm sorry if this isn't in the right section of the forum, but I don't know where to put this. I'm just confused as to whether or not there's something actually wrong here or it's just me overreacting about it.
Please, if you can, help me out here. I've been really scared that something may be wrong with me and I need help. Thanks for reading, and thanks in advance for any advice anyone has.
-talk to, "touch", and fully interact with people who aren't really there.. and this happens mostly all the time, even in school or when other people are around, although I try to hide it when others are there
-have in the past acted on very risky impulses that ended up completely screwing up my relationship with my parents, my reputation in our town, and my own views on myself and people around me
-when it comes to relationships, my moods tend to swing very drastically from loving and happy, to then anger, confusion, and depression when the relationship comes to an end, like the flip of a switch. I'm know to "overreact" and "go psycho" when a relationship ends
-get impulses to lie to make things seem more interesting, so that I have something to talk about and other people will be interested in me. I have exaggerated illnesses, lied about my past, and lied about things I've said just to get the kind of attention I want.
Some of the things I have mentioned may be irrelevant, but I just figured I might as well add them. I don't have enough time to really elaborate, and if anyone actually reads this and responds, I'll get more into detail rather than waste my time now.
Also, I'm sorry if this isn't in the right section of the forum, but I don't know where to put this. I'm just confused as to whether or not there's something actually wrong here or it's just me overreacting about it.
Please, if you can, help me out here. I've been really scared that something may be wrong with me and I need help. Thanks for reading, and thanks in advance for any advice anyone has.
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firenice
01-10-2007, 03:14 AM
miss c,
I believe this would be the appropriate board to place your concerns. What you are describing does have elements of abnormal behavior. However, I wouldn't phrase this as something being "wrong" with you. Rather, try to view these behaviors as indicators of a need to explore and examine yourself, discover the motivations and causes and make some changes which are more satisfying to you. The symptoms we experience when physically ill actually indicates the body is working properly in it's attempts to get better. And, just as we may go to a medical doctor to help the body heal, so in your situation you may want to consider working with a counselor or therapist in your area to help you gain insight and understanding about these behaviors and strategies to help you change them, if that is in fact a desire. Good luck.
I believe this would be the appropriate board to place your concerns. What you are describing does have elements of abnormal behavior. However, I wouldn't phrase this as something being "wrong" with you. Rather, try to view these behaviors as indicators of a need to explore and examine yourself, discover the motivations and causes and make some changes which are more satisfying to you. The symptoms we experience when physically ill actually indicates the body is working properly in it's attempts to get better. And, just as we may go to a medical doctor to help the body heal, so in your situation you may want to consider working with a counselor or therapist in your area to help you gain insight and understanding about these behaviors and strategies to help you change them, if that is in fact a desire. Good luck.
Sannah
01-10-2007, 08:53 AM
Miss C, I agree with firenice, I think that therapy is in order here. What you have described is that you are impulsive to the point of making terrible, life-ruining choices, you get rageful when you are abandoned, and you lie. You can have a better life - get help. Please elaborate.
miss c
01-10-2007, 07:51 PM
Thank you guys for your replies. I've figured that therapy is needed for my decision-making problems and all that, but what's really been concerning me is my talking to people who aren't there. I can't find any way to explain it, and as far as I know, it's not normal...
firenice
01-10-2007, 10:33 PM
miss c,
Give more details about this talking to people who are not there. How often? How long is the talk? What do you say? Do the people you talk to who aren't there, say anthing back to you? If so, what? How long has this gone on? Are there any positives from this talk? If so, what? What do you feel when you are engaged in this talk and after the talk? Do others know about this talk? Friends? Family? If so, what do they say?
On a slightly different note, are you taking medications? Have you taken medications? Have you used self medication in the past (ie drugs)? Are you currently getting enough sleep? How is your diet?
Sorry to be so inqusitive but this kind of information might help shed some light on the situation.
Give more details about this talking to people who are not there. How often? How long is the talk? What do you say? Do the people you talk to who aren't there, say anthing back to you? If so, what? How long has this gone on? Are there any positives from this talk? If so, what? What do you feel when you are engaged in this talk and after the talk? Do others know about this talk? Friends? Family? If so, what do they say?
On a slightly different note, are you taking medications? Have you taken medications? Have you used self medication in the past (ie drugs)? Are you currently getting enough sleep? How is your diet?
Sorry to be so inqusitive but this kind of information might help shed some light on the situation.
miss c
01-11-2007, 09:27 PM
I pretty much do it all the time, almost as if there is always someone with me. I could be completely alone (or even when there's people around) and turn and say my reaction to something to somebody not there, or start a conversation with someone not there, even reaching out and touching them, reacting as if they touch me. They do talk back to me, although I don't physically hear it, and I "see" them, although also not physically. In my mind I see and hear and feel them. It's like I'm always hanging out with a group of friends, and it's fun, although I'm embarrased to say so. It's even gotten to the point where it affects my schoolwork and distracts me because I'm "socializing". My parents noticed the slip in my grades, and I couldn't explain it any other way than "I get distracted". I'm too embarassed to admit why I'm really distracted. Most of the time I don't even realize I'm doing it until something pulls me back to reality, and I go "what the hell was I just doing and why?" and promise myself I'll stop. I can remember from when I was little I would do the same, but I passed it off as something little kids just do.. like with imaginary friends, you know? No one knows about it, and I don't know how I could ever tell anyone, if I ever do.
No, I'm not currently on any medications, and never was. I have thought of different drugs I could take to "fix myself", but have never actually done it, and the only one I have done is marijuana, but I do it very rarely. My sleeping and eating habits are pretty much the same as they always were... I normally go to bed around 10:30-11, wake up at 6... I've always eaten too much; I get cravings just to eat or at least chew on something, even if I'm not hungry. I tend to also eat more when I'm emotional, but I've always just snacked for the sake of having something as far back as I can remember. Surprisingly I don't have weight issues.
I don't mind you asking so many questions, feel free to ask more if needed. If it can help you to help me, I'm all for it.
No, I'm not currently on any medications, and never was. I have thought of different drugs I could take to "fix myself", but have never actually done it, and the only one I have done is marijuana, but I do it very rarely. My sleeping and eating habits are pretty much the same as they always were... I normally go to bed around 10:30-11, wake up at 6... I've always eaten too much; I get cravings just to eat or at least chew on something, even if I'm not hungry. I tend to also eat more when I'm emotional, but I've always just snacked for the sake of having something as far back as I can remember. Surprisingly I don't have weight issues.
I don't mind you asking so many questions, feel free to ask more if needed. If it can help you to help me, I'm all for it.
firenice
01-11-2007, 10:33 PM
miss c,
Thanks for the details. Two things come to mind. One, these conversations you have don't seem to be detrimental in and of themselves. They certainly do sound distracting (which may in part be the reason they exist) and they may be out of the ordinary (which may also be part of their purpose) but you indicate that it is somewhat pleasant, not in anyway painful, confusing or causing any headaches. Secondly, I don't sense any threat of loosing your orientation; that is, you seem to be able to let go and return to normal activities when needed. You may need to practice choosing that more often. I do not recommend trying to push out, banish or ostracise these voices. And, although you may have promised yourself to stop, you might find yourself doing it again. For whatever reason, they are part of your consciousness and I suggest you honor that they are there for a reason.
The two problems you have is 1) you don't understand the reason and 2) you are getting upset about it because you don't know what to do about it. If you knew the voices would be gone tomorrow, just like that, how would you feel? If there is any regret or sense of loss, then there is some value for you in having them.
Anyway, at least for the meantime, what would happen if you accepted it as something unique to you. You don't need to tell anyone but you don't need (yet) to try and stop it either. You can let yourself become even more comfortable and accepting of it. However, you need to continue to meet your obligations in the "real" world. You need to be able to tell your imaginary "visitors" (I'm not sure how you refer to them) that you are busy now and can socialize with them later. Maybe you can even begin to enter in a dialogue with one or more of them asking questions about what purpose they serve in your life.
Another approach, and one which you may need to consider, is a visit to a medical doctor for a complete exam and a referral to a psychologist or psychiatrist. In some cases, medication can be helpful.
Thanks for the details. Two things come to mind. One, these conversations you have don't seem to be detrimental in and of themselves. They certainly do sound distracting (which may in part be the reason they exist) and they may be out of the ordinary (which may also be part of their purpose) but you indicate that it is somewhat pleasant, not in anyway painful, confusing or causing any headaches. Secondly, I don't sense any threat of loosing your orientation; that is, you seem to be able to let go and return to normal activities when needed. You may need to practice choosing that more often. I do not recommend trying to push out, banish or ostracise these voices. And, although you may have promised yourself to stop, you might find yourself doing it again. For whatever reason, they are part of your consciousness and I suggest you honor that they are there for a reason.
The two problems you have is 1) you don't understand the reason and 2) you are getting upset about it because you don't know what to do about it. If you knew the voices would be gone tomorrow, just like that, how would you feel? If there is any regret or sense of loss, then there is some value for you in having them.
Anyway, at least for the meantime, what would happen if you accepted it as something unique to you. You don't need to tell anyone but you don't need (yet) to try and stop it either. You can let yourself become even more comfortable and accepting of it. However, you need to continue to meet your obligations in the "real" world. You need to be able to tell your imaginary "visitors" (I'm not sure how you refer to them) that you are busy now and can socialize with them later. Maybe you can even begin to enter in a dialogue with one or more of them asking questions about what purpose they serve in your life.
Another approach, and one which you may need to consider, is a visit to a medical doctor for a complete exam and a referral to a psychologist or psychiatrist. In some cases, medication can be helpful.
miss c
01-12-2007, 10:07 PM
Thank you firenice for your input. I've never really thought of just accepting it, actually. I've just tried to push it away because I feel like I'm not living in the real world as much as I probably should be because of it. Maybe if I could control it more I might be able to accept it, but I'm not really sure about that just yet.
I have considered seeing some kind of professional about it, but being only 16 I'm not exactly sure how to go about it, and I'm a bit uneasy about telling my parents because they'll look at my like I'm either crazy or lying. If there were some way I could see someone about this without my parents knowing the issue straight off, I would do that in a second. =/
I have considered seeing some kind of professional about it, but being only 16 I'm not exactly sure how to go about it, and I'm a bit uneasy about telling my parents because they'll look at my like I'm either crazy or lying. If there were some way I could see someone about this without my parents knowing the issue straight off, I would do that in a second. =/
firenice
01-12-2007, 10:46 PM
Maybe if I could control it more I might be able to accept it, but I'm not really sure about that just yet.
=/
Actually, your ability to control it will come from your accepting it, generally not the other way around. Either way, you should consider talking to your parents about this. You don't know for sure how they will respond. If you preface it with something like "this is important, please listen to me" then tell them and then let them know you want to see a professional about this. They might surprise you with some understanding and support.
=/
Actually, your ability to control it will come from your accepting it, generally not the other way around. Either way, you should consider talking to your parents about this. You don't know for sure how they will respond. If you preface it with something like "this is important, please listen to me" then tell them and then let them know you want to see a professional about this. They might surprise you with some understanding and support.