My 4 yo son seems miserable, his penis head seems like it's swollen only on one side (under the foreskin) and when I gently retract the foreskin just to see the tip it seems red. He won't even let me touch him and clean him b/c it hurts so much. I know not to retract the foreskin, so I haven't done that. And I've always been told to do nothing with the uncircum. penis, but how can I help him? I'm not positive that it's infected, but his penis tip is red swollen and painful. He doesn't take bubble baths, and he's fully potty trained.
I'm afraid that it will cause damage and that he'll need to be circumsiced, rather not go that route if it can be avoided.

Please help!!!

It sounds infected to me. I have 2 adopted boys who are uncircumcised, and the doctor told me that you do have to teach them to gently pull the foreskin back to clean the head of the penis. I would call the pediatrician right away.

He's got an infection. They're rare, but they do happen.
After a trip to the doctor's, and the right antibiotic, he'll be fine.
If they suggest circumcision, see another doctor.

Lisa, your doctor is incorrect. No one should be pulling the foreskin back, but its owner.
Foreskins retract in their own time, and don't need any cleaning until the head and foreskin separate.

I agree, definately an infection. If it does become a recurring thing, he may have to be circ'd (my brother was done at 3.5...painful but better then than at 18).
I just saw a dr about urinary issues for my own uncirc'd almost 4 year old and was told to NEVER pull the skin back...it doesn't need to be cleaned any special way, especially if they are bathing still. Your not even to use much if any soap on it.

Thank you for your replies.

Unfortunetly his ped suggested to gently start pulling the foreskin back as much as he could tolerate (back when he was about 2 years old) and so we started but he complained it hurt so we stopped and haven't done it since (last time was about a year ago). His foreskin is so tight that even if he wanted to pull it back I don't think it would.

I would rather not put him on systemic antibiotics but would a topical antibiotic (like neosporin) ointment help? He's had this occur 2 times before and they previously cleared up on it's own after a day or two from rinsing his penis with warm water after every urination.

I'm wondering is circumcision should be done to avoid further infections? I would hate to have to inflict pain on him but then I don't want him to have to go thru infection after infection.

He's got an infection. They're rare, but they do happen.
After a trip to the doctor's, and the right antibiotic, he'll be fine.
If they suggest circumcision, see another doctor.

Lisa, your doctor is incorrect. No one should be pulling the foreskin back, but its owner.
Foreskins retract in their own time, and don't need any cleaning until the head and foreskin separate.
i totally agree with both points.
my son is also not circd and the dr told us never to try and retract it until he can do it on his own.

my son is a halfy as i call it. from when he was a baby i would pull the skin back and just squeeze water and baby soap on it with a wash cloth and rinse. now he is 7 and he does it himself. i wonder if it could be some type of yeast or something. have you thought about trying something like athletes foot cream?
when he was a bit younger this had happened and we put some antifungul cream on it and it really helped.
just make sure and try and wash it like i listed it above and he will learn how to do it on his own when he is ready.
good luck and let me know what happens or if you try something else and it works in case it happens to us.
robin

okay, so i just read this sight and it said that it should become retractable on its own and can take anywhere from days, months to years. it also said the antifungal cream should work for redness and itching. washing with water and mild soap is fine also.
of course if it doesn't go away call your pedi.
take care,
robin

I am not trying to come down on anyone here but really the professionals do say to leave it alone and never pull the skin back/. I've never pulled my sons back to clean it...I just wash him in the tub, leaving the skin where it is.
As for using soap, again, not necessary especially if you are pulling it back slightly. What happens when you do this is that the soap can remain in the folds of the skin, cause irritation which leads to skin break down and infection.
The doctor I just saw for my sons UTI said to just leave it alone, wash gently with water in a tub. If there ever does become a reason to pull it back (like he's had a wild and messy bm) do so in the tub with water on it as it is less invasive.

He definitely has an infection which is not uncommon for uncircumcised boys. It can be taken care of by an antibiotic but if it happens again he may need to see a urologist.

Circumcision would definitely take care of the infections. Since the foreskin gives a warm, moist environment for bacteria to grow it is much more susceptible to infection. Circumcised guys do get infections but much,much less than uncircumcised guys.

You definitely need to gently pull back the foreskin and clean since it could be the lack of cleaning that caused the infection.

You definitely need to gently pull back the foreskin and clean since it could be the lack of cleaning that caused the infection.

So I should gently pull back?

I feel more confused now. I know this is probably an issue that people take sides on and are firm about (to pull or not to pull), but I seriously don't know what to do now.

Since I started this thread the inflammation has gone down and he's not complaining that much about it. I was wondering if the cause of infection could be that urine is trapped in the tip?? His urine is also concentrated, I try to get him to drink more, but he says he's not thristy. He still sits on the toilet to urinate, we've tried to get him to stand and gently pull back for the tip to show when peeing, but he doesn't like to pee standing up.
If standing and gently pulling to pee would help then I will be more diligent in enforcing him to stand. Do you think?

Thank you all for your help, it's really appreciated.

I asked this same question (pulling back)when my son was in for his UTI as we saw 2 dr's with different views over 3 days. The first dr said to pull it back a bit, gently, and put a bit of polysporin ointment on it as his tip was slightly inflammed. The second dr was the one who diagnosed the UTI and said not to pull it back to clean but if it was red/inflammed that pulling it back only sightly was ok but not to clean it with anything but water as this breeds infection (the residue).
As for his urine being concentrated, I would look into getting a urine sample to check for a UTI or other infection...can't hurt.
Standing to pee is hard for little boys who've never done it...my son is one of these. AND catching urine for a sample is very hard when sitting over the toilet. I have him pee in his potty with the jar under his penis to do it.
As for peeing standing up and pulling the skin back, I don't think it will help as the urine can still get trapped in the skin either way AND I don't think it's a good idea to have him pulling his skin back himself anyway. AND on top of that I don't think uncirc'd boys/men do this normally (although I have no idea if this is correct...just my assumption).
Good luck...and you are right, this is a touchy issue as is circumcision. My feeling is to just leave it alone...as nature made it...I don't think that the intention of the covering was to be pulled back at all except when necessary (let them all figure that one out when it happens on it's own in teenage years!!!)

"He definitely has an infection which is not uncommon for uncircumcised boys. It can be taken care of by an antibiotic but if it happens again he may need to see a urologist."

Infections of the penis are uncommon for uncircumcised boys.
Please cite your sources, or please stop spreading misinformation.

"Circumcision would definitely take care of the infections. Since the foreskin gives a warm, moist environment for bacteria to grow it is much more susceptible to infection. Circumcised guys do get infections but much,much less than uncircumcised guys."

Circumcision would take care of the infections, the way removing the tongue would cure bad breath. Speaking of warm moist environments for bacteria to grow, have you ever seen a vulva or a vagina? No one is advocating surgery to make them easier to maintain. Can you please cite medically published sources, which say that circumcised guys get infections much, much less than circumcised guys? My dad died at 65, without ever having had a problem. The same for my father-in-law, but he was 72. I am 53, and still waiting.

"You definitely need to gently pull back the foreskin and clean since it could be the lack of cleaning that caused the infection."

Why are you giving incorrect advice on how to care for a penis with a foreskin, when you and your son are circumcised?

Tommy is correct. A litte boy's foreskin should not be pulled back by anyone else. The foreskin is fused to the glans in 99.9% of all newborns, so there is no cavity where germs and dirt can collect. It gradually separates as the boy grows, helped by his natural tendency to pull on it. At 3 or 4 you could ask a boy if it will go back without hurting or ask him to pull it back as far as it will go without pain. If it won't go back it should just be left alone. Once it will go back he should be encouraged to wash it daily in the bath or shower without soap. Any soap can cause irritation.
See the section on care of the infant penis in my stretching instructions near the top of the Men's Health board
http://www.healthboards.com/boards/showthread.php?t=210347
In this case he needs the infection cleared up with antibiotics or antifungals, depending on what sort of infection it is. It is imperative to do this to prevent the infection doing damage from scarring. Once the infection is cleared then you can ask him how far it will pull back. There is obviously some cavity there now or no infection would be possible. The illadvised earlier attempt at retraction may have already done some damage but time and future natural stretching may negate this. Don't be rushed into unnecessary surgery at this stage.
Geoff

Obviously there are differing opinions on this matter. Here is an article that might help. http://www.webmd.com/hw/raising_a_family/tp21272.asp

Thanks to Tommy and Geoff for their info on this as well as the ref to the men's thread. You will see that that poster also had comments regarding uncirc'd boys and UTI's (see thread UTI in 3.5 year old boy) that I was pretty sure was untrue but am glad to hear some very valid info to help support my feelings on this. I was very glad to read the info on cleaning it as there really seems to be mixed feelings on when to do it and how and believe it or not NO ONE has ever told me, the mom of 2 boys, how to teach them how.
My brother was circ'd at 3.5 as he had one infection and the dr said it was best to do it then instead of when he was older. True point if there was going to be repeated problems but if there wasn't???? I'd hate to put anyone through that if it doesn't need to be done.

there's lots of controversy over circ or not-circ issues; personally, at 45, i wish my parents had got me done... i am actually fed up battling clenliness issues (even bathing everyday doesnt really fix it), redness, infections, etc...

there is tons of info out there for and against. most will baffle the hell out of you...:) :)

you know, i did have my son circum. when he was born but when i brought him home i was like, they didn't circum. him.
it seems that only the very tip was taken off so i call him a halfy. i was concerned at first and took him to a urologist because i didn't know any better and felt like he still needed the skin taken off. the doc said that he would be happy to do it but that it wasn't nec. and that when he grew up it would only bother him if i made a big deal about it. now that he is a little older i have explained to him that every one is different, and i wasn't just focusing on his penis, i was talking about everything. to wash it it is just become part of cleaning like everything else like his ears. i still have to treat him like he is uncircum though because their is most of the skin their. maybe just like everything else everyone is different and should do and try what they think is right after reading and talking to whoever about it.
so far what i have done and tried works really well and i never forced my sons skin back but over time it did it on its own.
he is now 7yrs old and we have not had any really big problems that i couldn't take care of on my own. i have read alot of sites that back up what i put and some that back up what other have written, so what ever you think is best.
did you try the Lotrimin by the way.
take care,
robin

The whole point of this thread was to help a mom with her son's problem, not debate circumcision. It's obvious that even doctors have differing opinions about proper hygeine. To circumcise or not is a personal choice, and nobody should be made to feel bad for their choice.

The whole point of this thread was to help a mom with her son's problem, not debate circumcision. It's obvious that even doctors have differing opinions about proper hygeine. To circumcise or not is a personal choice, and nobody should be made to feel bad for their choice.

Thank you all for your varied viewpoints. It has been informative to read all of them, but LisaFaith is right, I wanted to know how to properly care for the infection and not cause a debate about what is right or wrong or that I made a mistake in not circumsising (sp?). my son when he was born.

The infection has cleared, by the way. Thank you all for your input.:)

Glad to hear it's all cleared up,
Best,
Geoff

i am so happy that it cleared up. i am sorry if i said anything out of content or to make you uncomfortable in any way.
take care and best wishes,
robin;)

Good for you and your son. Glad to hear things are better.