hi everyone,
i am kinda concerned about my eldest (11). it is a bit embarrasing but may be somebody had to deal with this before.
the boy is ok, very healthy (never been ill acctually) doing sports and all what a normal boy does, but when it comes to .. going to toilet - N2, well... he says he cant hold it.. lots of times he halfy does it before reaching to place. we tryed to talk, to remind him or anything you can imagine but no change. until the last moment he doesnt feel it and when he does is too late. no every day, like but at least 2-3 times a week... it is not only about the stained underwear but he is a big boy and this thing must be controlled by now.
what do we do?
sorry for the disgusting topic..

I don't have any experience with this myself, as I'm still potty training two toddlers. But have you had him checked out to see if maybe there is something wrong with his bowels. Maybe even just give a call to his ped and see if they have an idea, or take him in and they can do some tests or something. I do know that a friend of mine has fecal incontinence and she can't tell she has to have a bowel movement until the very last minute, so she wears absorbent underwear and she's only in her 20's. She has a problem that I don't really know much about, as she's embarassed to talk about it too much. This might be something to look into, as he may not really be able to tell, physically, that he has to go #2. Just a thought.

Oh and I always say, when talking about children, there is nothing too gross!! LOL. I never thought talking about poo wouldn't gross me out until I had kids and it became a normal part of my conversation with friends LOL.:rolleyes:

i agree,at his age,he realistically should not be having this type of problem.is this something new or has he always been like this?either way,it should be brought to the attention of his doc.he could possibly have a UTI or some other bladder type issues.you just need to be sure just in case,ya know?just have this evaluated and see what may be the culprit.he could just need some muscle strengthening in that area too.you just wont know til you rule out a few things at the docs office.good luck,and please let us know what you find out.marcia

thanks very much. we have a docs appointment for friday, i will see how it goes, only thing is that he dont think it is an issue and maybe wont want to say anything. whenever i try and talk he says: i will try harder, and i will clean my pants myself leave me alone!
like i care about the old pants! . and all is quiet .. until the next time..

Are his stools normal or does he suffer from diarrhoea? My adult brother-in-law suffered from AIDS-related faecal incontinence and he seemed to have no warning either. He had dementure too and some pathway was knocked out. However if he has irritable bowel syndrome or coeliac disease he would have very similar symptoms to what you describe, with or without diarrhoea,
Good luck with the doctor's visit.
Geoff