hergy
01-26-2007, 03:08 PM
I realized, as of late, that the progress I've been making is being made by one side of me, the thinking Nikki that has always taken care of business. The other side, my core of emotions, is still in denial. I can accept certain things, but NOT others. When I see others hurting for reasons similar to my own, I involuntarily shut down to protect myself. That's primarily due to my 'friends' in 1976, NOT 2007.
EVERYONE on this board deserves unconditional love, peace and acceptance. We didn't create our traumas, the traumas fell over us like a dark cloak. We weren't armed, we had no malice.
This board is a community of individuals in pain for varying reasons. No one here is traumatizing anyone else. I always hope that my posts don't hurt anyone because I know everyone here already hurts.
From childhood to adulthood, it's second nature to pretend I'm somewhere else when problems arise. I'm sure I'm not the only one.
I don't have a malfunctioning memory, but that method of self-removal has wiped out a lot of my past. My body's always here, but my head often floats into some fairytale land, and I miss what's actually happening. When I recall an event, it's not usually pleasant. I freeze, get numb and fall into a depression. I isolate myself, hurt myself and wish for an escape.
The past few days, posting has been a struggle. My emotions have taken a vacation and I'm afraid my words appear empty and clinical.
Well, there it is. Nikki's shell has echoed some stuff. Just sharing.
Nikki
EVERYONE on this board deserves unconditional love, peace and acceptance. We didn't create our traumas, the traumas fell over us like a dark cloak. We weren't armed, we had no malice.
This board is a community of individuals in pain for varying reasons. No one here is traumatizing anyone else. I always hope that my posts don't hurt anyone because I know everyone here already hurts.
From childhood to adulthood, it's second nature to pretend I'm somewhere else when problems arise. I'm sure I'm not the only one.
I don't have a malfunctioning memory, but that method of self-removal has wiped out a lot of my past. My body's always here, but my head often floats into some fairytale land, and I miss what's actually happening. When I recall an event, it's not usually pleasant. I freeze, get numb and fall into a depression. I isolate myself, hurt myself and wish for an escape.
The past few days, posting has been a struggle. My emotions have taken a vacation and I'm afraid my words appear empty and clinical.
Well, there it is. Nikki's shell has echoed some stuff. Just sharing.
Nikki
Sponsor
Sannah
01-26-2007, 03:26 PM
Nikki, you are so able to figure out what is going on with yourself and express it! Most people really are not this good at it. It is incredible and a big asset to getting better. Remember that you function at two levels. One is an emotional level and one is an intellectual level. Your emotional level can still be back at a 4 yr old where your intellectual development can be in your 30's. I am sure that thinking about integrating with Hannah is what is making you feel numb right now.
You said that accepting what has happened to you will destroy who you are. I guess you are saying that it will destabilize the intellectual Nikki? I know that this is the path to getting better and I guess that sometimes it can get rough. But this is the correct path.
You said that accepting what has happened to you will destroy who you are. I guess you are saying that it will destabilize the intellectual Nikki? I know that this is the path to getting better and I guess that sometimes it can get rough. But this is the correct path.
hergy
01-26-2007, 03:35 PM
Nikki, you are so able to figure out what is going on with yourself and express it!...Remember that you function at two levels. One is an emotional level and one is an intellectual level. Your emotional level can still be back at a 4 yr old where your intellectual development can be in your 30's. I am sure that thinking about integrating with Hannah is what is making you feel numb right now....this is the correct path.
Thanks, Sannah. I actually was afraid I wasn't making much sense. I can verbalize, but I do feel like a 4-year-old emotionally. In fact, in therapy, when I explain my emotions, I often hear myself using the words of a child. That's embarassing, but my therapist is insightful and understanding, so I'm actually the only one who's judging me.
With my adult mind, I know how devastating rape is on a kid. With my heart, I remember how it felt. I also feel those effects now. I mourn what I lost and I'm angered beyond description by the event. To me, my true self was slammed to the ground and destroyed. I don't ever remember having 'childlike wonder.' I guess I just pretended to be a kid.
Hugs and love,
Nikki
Thanks, Sannah. I actually was afraid I wasn't making much sense. I can verbalize, but I do feel like a 4-year-old emotionally. In fact, in therapy, when I explain my emotions, I often hear myself using the words of a child. That's embarassing, but my therapist is insightful and understanding, so I'm actually the only one who's judging me.
With my adult mind, I know how devastating rape is on a kid. With my heart, I remember how it felt. I also feel those effects now. I mourn what I lost and I'm angered beyond description by the event. To me, my true self was slammed to the ground and destroyed. I don't ever remember having 'childlike wonder.' I guess I just pretended to be a kid.
Hugs and love,
Nikki
Sannah
01-26-2007, 03:43 PM
Nikki, after I posted this last post I saw that you edited your first entry here. When you mentioned that you might be hurting others with your posts, on the other post when I told you that your description of your self during the rape sent me back to my own inner child and it whipped me. That was not a bad experience. It is okay for me to go back, it did not hurt me. Actually, I think things like this make you stronger because they are within you and when they get pulled out you can sort of deal with it a bit.
I can see how you would shut down to protect yourself. You can only take so much at a time.
I can see how you would shut down to protect yourself. You can only take so much at a time.
ICC
01-26-2007, 05:16 PM
Nikki---you are making perfect sense.
Love you,
ICC
Love you,
ICC
Phoenix
01-26-2007, 11:40 PM
Dear Nikki,
You feel like a 4 year old emotionally because the traumatic event never allowed you to grow since then, hence your emotions stopped maturing at that age.
Take care
You feel like a 4 year old emotionally because the traumatic event never allowed you to grow since then, hence your emotions stopped maturing at that age.
Take care
ICC
01-27-2007, 07:36 AM
Nikki--FTM is right. i say this as I am in your shoes for different reasons. my mother's negligence became fully known at about age 5. I told my therapist one day I felt i was emtionally immature. she didn't agree but felt i lacked the coping skills emotionally to get through adult situations and to see the difference in not everyone berating me as my mother did. soI belive I am emotionally unstable? uneducated? or still have the emotions of a 5 year old. sometimes i either let people take advantage or I blow up . need some stability here as an adult to speak up in an adult tone. no need to take anymore crap or create a scene. plain and simple, don't over step my boundaries . thisis the biggest thing i am working on adn it's hard since I am still on guard all the time. taking my time thinking before i react. What does this situation call for???? an answer/no answer. i'll get there and i'll get comfortable with it. if PTSD can be my right hand for so many years I am certain that boundaries that i build can replace the "monster" and become my right hand.
Hugs,
ICC
Hugs,
ICC
hergy
01-27-2007, 07:50 AM
I am still on guard all the time.
Me, too. The wall I've built hinders my progress. I'm so scared. It helps me more than I can say to know I'm not the only one who does that. But I also hurt so much that a dear friend feels that pain.
I love you, ICC. Hang on. You can move forward and balance those boundaries. You're a tough lady.
Love,
Nikki
Me, too. The wall I've built hinders my progress. I'm so scared. It helps me more than I can say to know I'm not the only one who does that. But I also hurt so much that a dear friend feels that pain.
I love you, ICC. Hang on. You can move forward and balance those boundaries. You're a tough lady.
Love,
Nikki
Phoenix
01-27-2007, 08:05 AM
[QUOTE=red_five;2766442I'm so scared.
Hang on. You can move forward and balance those boundaries. You're a tough lady.
Love,
Nikki[/QUOTE]
Dear Nikki,
Fear of the unknown is actually considered "normal."
If water is rising and the only way that it will not drown you is by opening the door down the hall, how must you get there?
A: One step at a time my dear, one step at a time.
Take care
God Bless:angel:
FTM
Hang on. You can move forward and balance those boundaries. You're a tough lady.
Love,
Nikki[/QUOTE]
Dear Nikki,
Fear of the unknown is actually considered "normal."
If water is rising and the only way that it will not drown you is by opening the door down the hall, how must you get there?
A: One step at a time my dear, one step at a time.
Take care
God Bless:angel:
FTM
ICC
01-27-2007, 08:29 AM
Nikki---the walls i built many years ago to protect myself have also hindered my progress. I am safe with my husband, both daughters and my therapist not to mention all of you BUT i have had to knock the walls down brick by brick to even know what was behind them. It is hard and frightening. but necessary for recovery. I have broken them down in the company of my therapist and mostly my husband because he would protect me with his life hence i felt secure. I would cry like a baby and he would sit and listen, never judge and then the hug came. and so did some relief. I have been working on this for over 2 years and didn't really open up to anyone until september. Have gotten in all out , have written many letters and had the burning ritual ( I find it to be a great tool). I have been able to sit and picture my "little self" playing and getting into her mind. the hurt my mother caused both of us but also have found the love of life we both have. so i visit her once a day and the days of her crying are over and ahve been replace with playing marbles, jacks, barbies, bowling, swimming. they were the things i loved as a child and the swimming end of it is still there.My ex-husbands abuse of me starting at 14 and finally ending at 40 if gone. Nikki start one brick at a time and knock those walls that are keeping you from living . don't let anyone tell you how fast or how slow you need to do it but YOU need to break them down. do it in the company of those you trust with your life and that can hold you as the memories and the "goodbyes" to a past life start ot leave. You will grieve the past as it is a part of you. but just as someone leaves this world the trauma of PTSD can also.
Love you sweetheart,
ICC xo
Love you sweetheart,
ICC xo
Phoenix
01-27-2007, 08:33 AM
Let the "burning" begin.
Sannah
01-27-2007, 10:03 AM
ICC, the posts that you have written these last few days are the STRONGEST that I have ever read from you. There is no doubt, no confusion, you are going to do what is best for you. This is so wonderful! You are on the right track for you! You sound so strong and know what you need to do for yourself. I think that you have discovered how to build your boundaries and you are doing it as we speak, one brick at a time. I am so happy for you! You are going to get there because now you can see your way and you have that energy behind it now so that nothing will stop you. Yeh! This is what it takes, I think, that almost angry energy that you have had enough and nothing is going to stop you now from getting better. I think that anger at the situation is strong enough to push all the fear away. Maybe you have also embraced your identity and this is what is also making you stronger. You go girl!
Love you,
Sannah
Love you,
Sannah
ICC
01-27-2007, 09:06 PM
THANK YOU SANNAH MY FRIEND*********** you saw and heard me loud and clear.
Love you too,
ICC xo
Love you too,
ICC xo
missbluesky
01-29-2007, 10:11 PM
Nikki Hi,
I can relate and I think anytime we are in process of becoming self-aware then that is a forward step. When I think how many years I spent doing anything which would interrupt the things really eating me inside, I can get really down on me with regret...so that I find that even regret can be a secondhand stalling tactic. Just making the connection as to what we are actually doing to prevent/delay this is progress, I do believe. I know I take one step forward & a half one backwards & sometimes get stuck it seems, but I think the main thing is that we not be too hard on ourselves. Others do/have done enough of that already, and no doubt will continue to do so.
I do think that so many are oblivious over their motivations and that you are one up on the game now with this discovery. Some days I just seem to want to need to take a break as the process is so painful at times. I know I don't need to remind you of this.
Just in the way of saying that I can relate to your words & meanings here.
I have felt a bit under par the past few days, but I did not do drugs, drink, binge or feel like I'd otherwise lost it, other than to say "gee I wished it'd been better. I am thankful for days of just being not feeling overwhelmed by circumstances and just holding an even keel. I used to think that that was just plain boring.
I do believe now that this is a victory. Congratulations, Nikki! :cool:
I can relate and I think anytime we are in process of becoming self-aware then that is a forward step. When I think how many years I spent doing anything which would interrupt the things really eating me inside, I can get really down on me with regret...so that I find that even regret can be a secondhand stalling tactic. Just making the connection as to what we are actually doing to prevent/delay this is progress, I do believe. I know I take one step forward & a half one backwards & sometimes get stuck it seems, but I think the main thing is that we not be too hard on ourselves. Others do/have done enough of that already, and no doubt will continue to do so.
I do think that so many are oblivious over their motivations and that you are one up on the game now with this discovery. Some days I just seem to want to need to take a break as the process is so painful at times. I know I don't need to remind you of this.
Just in the way of saying that I can relate to your words & meanings here.
I have felt a bit under par the past few days, but I did not do drugs, drink, binge or feel like I'd otherwise lost it, other than to say "gee I wished it'd been better. I am thankful for days of just being not feeling overwhelmed by circumstances and just holding an even keel. I used to think that that was just plain boring.
I do believe now that this is a victory. Congratulations, Nikki! :cool:
hergy
01-30-2007, 02:39 AM
When I think how many years I spent doing anything which would interrupt the things really eating me inside, I can get really down on me with regret...so that I find that even regret can be a secondhand stalling tactic. Just making the connection as to what we are actually doing to prevent/delay this is progress, I do believe. I know I take one step forward & a half one backwards & sometimes get stuck it seems, but I think the main thing is that we not be too hard on ourselves. Others do/have done enough of that already, and no doubt will continue to do so.
...Some days I just seem to want to need to take a break as the process is so painful at times.....I am thankful for days of just being not feeling overwhelmed by circumstances and just holding an even keel. I used to think that that was just plain boring.
I'd have to painfully reach way down deep to retrieve such a take on this situation. You're remarkable in your way with words, missbluesky.
I do get in a disturbing zone when I allow myself to think about the things that I know have screwed me up. Even though I don't concsiously connect emotion to those events, it's happening on some level.
I ALWAYS want to take that mental break. It does seem boring floating about in a land I know isn't real. But the distracting pain of facing the issues IS overwhelming.
Thanks for understanding. It feels good to know I'm not alone. My best wishes are for your continued progress.
Love,
Nikki
...Some days I just seem to want to need to take a break as the process is so painful at times.....I am thankful for days of just being not feeling overwhelmed by circumstances and just holding an even keel. I used to think that that was just plain boring.
I'd have to painfully reach way down deep to retrieve such a take on this situation. You're remarkable in your way with words, missbluesky.
I do get in a disturbing zone when I allow myself to think about the things that I know have screwed me up. Even though I don't concsiously connect emotion to those events, it's happening on some level.
I ALWAYS want to take that mental break. It does seem boring floating about in a land I know isn't real. But the distracting pain of facing the issues IS overwhelming.
Thanks for understanding. It feels good to know I'm not alone. My best wishes are for your continued progress.
Love,
Nikki
missbluesky
01-31-2007, 12:57 AM
Nikki,
I know, I know it is so hurtful... Just give yourself permission to go slow, you don't need to feel overwhelmed all the time. I had to sort this all out in order to live without various addictions taking over my life. If you haven't leaned on these, please give yourself lots of credit, my dear. It seems I had to learn what not to do by doing everything wrong for a long long time. I don't recommend that path to anyone.
I know, I know it is so hurtful... Just give yourself permission to go slow, you don't need to feel overwhelmed all the time. I had to sort this all out in order to live without various addictions taking over my life. If you haven't leaned on these, please give yourself lots of credit, my dear. It seems I had to learn what not to do by doing everything wrong for a long long time. I don't recommend that path to anyone.
hergy
01-31-2007, 01:23 AM
Just give yourself permission to go slow, you don't need to feel overwhelmed all the time. I had to sort this all out in order to live without various addictions taking over my life. If you haven't leaned on these, please give yourself lots of credit, my dear.
Missbluesky,
I have never turned to drugs or alcohol, but my addiction lies with self injury. When overwhelmed, it takes me away from emotion and attaches my psyche to an enlivening, though sick, experience.
I recently was putting forth much effort to steer myself away from the habit. But a recent, mindblowing realization on my road to facing my past has rekindled my addiction.
I currently have no desire to quit. It helps so much. I wish I could give myself the credit you mentioned.
Best wishes,
Nikki
Missbluesky,
I have never turned to drugs or alcohol, but my addiction lies with self injury. When overwhelmed, it takes me away from emotion and attaches my psyche to an enlivening, though sick, experience.
I recently was putting forth much effort to steer myself away from the habit. But a recent, mindblowing realization on my road to facing my past has rekindled my addiction.
I currently have no desire to quit. It helps so much. I wish I could give myself the credit you mentioned.
Best wishes,
Nikki
missbluesky
01-31-2007, 01:52 AM
Oh, I am so sorry to hear that. Self-injury in the form of cutting oneself??? I never tried that one. Probably only as a result of vanity. That takes nerve.
hergy
01-31-2007, 02:01 AM
Oh, I am so sorry to hear that. Self-injury in the form of cutting oneself??? I never tried that one. Probably only as a result of vanity. That takes nerve.
Don't try it.
I hate the scars. It's like an impulse now. It's a horrible addiction. I started when I was about 25. I do use a razor now, but I used to take more drastic measures. However, to stay out of the hospital, I've become more discreet.
Don't try it.
I hate the scars. It's like an impulse now. It's a horrible addiction. I started when I was about 25. I do use a razor now, but I used to take more drastic measures. However, to stay out of the hospital, I've become more discreet.
missbluesky
01-31-2007, 02:18 AM
Sounds to me, red, as if it may function like any other sort of addiction, if feeling compelled to do this. Inflicting pain in order to distract from the original pain, due to thinking the latter one to be more manageable is the profile of addiction. Have you tried si anonymous?
The only way to heal this is to walk through the fire of those things you are avoiding. (not alone to-o-o scarey.) They won't kill you and they won't go away until you cease hiding from them.
Still I think you are making progress because you are at least aware of what is going on. You are not in denial anymore. Sounds like the 'Queen' has just been dethroned! This is the first stage in defrocking this sabateur. Sort of like the fake wiz behind the curtain in the Wizzard Of Oz.
The only way to heal this is to walk through the fire of those things you are avoiding. (not alone to-o-o scarey.) They won't kill you and they won't go away until you cease hiding from them.
Still I think you are making progress because you are at least aware of what is going on. You are not in denial anymore. Sounds like the 'Queen' has just been dethroned! This is the first stage in defrocking this sabateur. Sort of like the fake wiz behind the curtain in the Wizzard Of Oz.
Phoenix
01-31-2007, 07:08 AM
When overwhelmed, it takes me away from emotion and attaches my psyche to an enlivening, though sick, experience.
I recently was putting forth much effort to steer myself away from the habit. But a recent, mindblowing realization on my road to facing my past has rekindled my addiction.
I currently have no desire to quit. I wish I could give myself the credit you mentioned.
Dear Nikki,
I believe that we all have that "Houdini complex" in each one of us.
Do you feel that so much effort was placed at "X" so there wasn't enough "energy" to entertain "Y" ? (just asking)
Realize that you are no longer that person of yesteryear but an individual training for the "hurdles" event in the "track and field" of life.
I say track and field because sometimes it can feel that we have begun a race, to only finish at the very beginning.
You have a gift for expressing yourself; use this and take out a few of the "tools" that you picked up along the way.
There is validity to the saying "This too shall pass."
Let's "talk."
Take care
God Bless
FTM
I recently was putting forth much effort to steer myself away from the habit. But a recent, mindblowing realization on my road to facing my past has rekindled my addiction.
I currently have no desire to quit. I wish I could give myself the credit you mentioned.
Dear Nikki,
I believe that we all have that "Houdini complex" in each one of us.
Do you feel that so much effort was placed at "X" so there wasn't enough "energy" to entertain "Y" ? (just asking)
Realize that you are no longer that person of yesteryear but an individual training for the "hurdles" event in the "track and field" of life.
I say track and field because sometimes it can feel that we have begun a race, to only finish at the very beginning.
You have a gift for expressing yourself; use this and take out a few of the "tools" that you picked up along the way.
There is validity to the saying "This too shall pass."
Let's "talk."
Take care
God Bless
FTM
hergy
01-31-2007, 12:37 PM
I say track and field because sometimes it can feel that we have begun a race, to only finish at the very beginning.
Just as in a long race, runners often hit a 'wall,' when their endurance is truly tested. I hit a wall and have yet to run through it.
Sunday, my denial got kicked in the face with a steel-toed boot. I find myself trying to repair the damage, but the truth is taunting me.
Destroyed by the 'truth,' distracting my attention, the attention of a worthless individual, feels right. My foot looks like a tiger got hold of it, and I don't care.
The reason I'm not back on the SI board is that I don't really have any words of encouragement or hope at this time as far as SI goes. I stare frequently at my recent wounds like a proud warrior. I'm not proud that I hurt myself, but it's like I'm looking at something that should be there, like I replaced a missing part.
Hugs,
Nikki
Just as in a long race, runners often hit a 'wall,' when their endurance is truly tested. I hit a wall and have yet to run through it.
Sunday, my denial got kicked in the face with a steel-toed boot. I find myself trying to repair the damage, but the truth is taunting me.
Destroyed by the 'truth,' distracting my attention, the attention of a worthless individual, feels right. My foot looks like a tiger got hold of it, and I don't care.
The reason I'm not back on the SI board is that I don't really have any words of encouragement or hope at this time as far as SI goes. I stare frequently at my recent wounds like a proud warrior. I'm not proud that I hurt myself, but it's like I'm looking at something that should be there, like I replaced a missing part.
Hugs,
Nikki
Phoenix
01-31-2007, 04:47 PM
Just as in a long race, runners often hit a 'wall,' when their endurance is truly tested. I hit a wall and have yet to run through it.
The reason I'm not back on the SI board is that I don't really have any words of encouragement or hope at this time as far as SI goes. I stare frequently at my recent wounds like a proud warrior. I'm not proud that I hurt myself, but it's like I'm looking at something that should be there, like I replaced a missing part.
Dear Nikki,
Once a runner hits the "wall" the race is pretty much over for that person.
What are you contemplating "running through?"
I was beginning to wonder when the subject of SI posting would arise.
You don't always have to bring words of encouragement or hope to the table.
There is a special "come as you are" table constructed that was built by not only our predecessors but by current members.
You coming back would show others that it is alright to.
You and I have had some "history" there and if you look at the amount of views and posts.......................
I will let you complete this sentence.
We will talk.
Take care
God Bless
FTM
The reason I'm not back on the SI board is that I don't really have any words of encouragement or hope at this time as far as SI goes. I stare frequently at my recent wounds like a proud warrior. I'm not proud that I hurt myself, but it's like I'm looking at something that should be there, like I replaced a missing part.
Dear Nikki,
Once a runner hits the "wall" the race is pretty much over for that person.
What are you contemplating "running through?"
I was beginning to wonder when the subject of SI posting would arise.
You don't always have to bring words of encouragement or hope to the table.
There is a special "come as you are" table constructed that was built by not only our predecessors but by current members.
You coming back would show others that it is alright to.
You and I have had some "history" there and if you look at the amount of views and posts.......................
I will let you complete this sentence.
We will talk.
Take care
God Bless
FTM
hergy
01-31-2007, 06:46 PM
I was beginning to wonder when the subject of SI posting would arise....You and I have had some "history" there and if you look at the amount of views and posts....
You are so cool.
You're right about the SI board. I'll get back to it.
I just don't want to give anybody the idea that sliding backward is good and healthy as long as you don't care.
You are so cool.
You're right about the SI board. I'll get back to it.
I just don't want to give anybody the idea that sliding backward is good and healthy as long as you don't care.
stick2013
01-31-2007, 06:59 PM
Dearest Nikki,
Overcoming ANYTHING takes time, patience, and a will to do so. Sometimes we try, fail, try, fail, and try again.......With the end game.... VICTORY!!!!
Never STOP trying to QUIT....
Love you more than you know.......:angel: :angel: :angel:
Hugs,
Sid
Overcoming ANYTHING takes time, patience, and a will to do so. Sometimes we try, fail, try, fail, and try again.......With the end game.... VICTORY!!!!
Never STOP trying to QUIT....
Love you more than you know.......:angel: :angel: :angel:
Hugs,
Sid
hergy
01-31-2007, 07:11 PM
Overcoming ANYTHING takes time, patience, and a will to do so. Sometimes we try, fail, try, fail, and try again.......With the end game.... VICTORY!!!!
Never STOP trying to QUIT...
Wow, Sid. Thanks. You don't usually come right out like that about my SI.
Your confidence and support mean a lot to me. It feels good to hear that 'keep trying' is ok. I still see things in black and white, pass or fail. I tend to give up when I can't do something perfectly.
Thanks again. I love you, too.
Nikki
Never STOP trying to QUIT...
Wow, Sid. Thanks. You don't usually come right out like that about my SI.
Your confidence and support mean a lot to me. It feels good to hear that 'keep trying' is ok. I still see things in black and white, pass or fail. I tend to give up when I can't do something perfectly.
Thanks again. I love you, too.
Nikki
Phoenix
01-31-2007, 07:36 PM
I just don't want to give anybody the idea that sliding backward is good and healthy as long as you don't care.
Dear Nikki,
"Sliding backward" may not be "good and healthy" but it does happen nonetheless; that is a fact of life.
That could be a wonderful place to begin:
" I don't want to give anybody the idea...........................you get the idea.
Take care
God Bless
FTM
Dear Nikki,
"Sliding backward" may not be "good and healthy" but it does happen nonetheless; that is a fact of life.
That could be a wonderful place to begin:
" I don't want to give anybody the idea...........................you get the idea.
Take care
God Bless
FTM
stick2013
01-31-2007, 07:51 PM
Wow, Sid. Thanks. You don't usually come right out like that about my SI.
Your confidence and support mean a lot to me. It feels good to hear that 'keep trying' is ok. I still see things in black and white, pass or fail. I tend to give up when I can't do something perfectly.
Thanks again. I love you, too.
Nikki
Dearest Nikki,
We ARE twins...... I am the queen of perfection.......LOL
Hugs,
Sid
Your confidence and support mean a lot to me. It feels good to hear that 'keep trying' is ok. I still see things in black and white, pass or fail. I tend to give up when I can't do something perfectly.
Thanks again. I love you, too.
Nikki
Dearest Nikki,
We ARE twins...... I am the queen of perfection.......LOL
Hugs,
Sid
hergy
01-31-2007, 09:37 PM
"I don't want to give anybody the idea...........................you get the idea.
THANKS, FTM!:wave: I'm going to use that. I needed an opening.
Love and hugs,
Nikki
THANKS, FTM!:wave: I'm going to use that. I needed an opening.
Love and hugs,
Nikki