I don't know how we got to the point that we now have to rock or hold my 1 month old son in order for him to go to sleep. And God forbid he wake up when we go to put him down because then we have to start the whole process again.

How on earth do I get him to just go to sleep when I put him in his crib? I've tried to just let him cry but OMG he'll just cry forever and never fall asleep!

I need some serious advise or tips, please!

Thanks! :)

Honestly, your baby is so little and needs this right now. It might be a pain, but try to enjoy the time with him. They are not like adults where they can just hit the pillow and be out in a few minutes.

They are only so little for a short amount of time. I personally love to watch my DS sleep. Those little faces he makes are so cute as I am holding him in my arms.

In time, it should get a bit easier, but as far as I know, many babies need to be rocked to sleep.

I know my DS gets rocked many times throughout the day - just as a way to "decompress." He gets fussy and sometimes just wants to suck on his pacifier and be rocked.

Allowing your baby to cry it out at this age probably isn't the best idea. I don't recommend it. He is telling you that he needs you to rock him.

I agree. Your little boy is so little. He's a bit too little for the cry it out thing. Instead of rocking him to get him to sleep, though, you could wait until he's sleepy (right before he would nod off on his own) and then try to put him down. That way, he'll learn to put himself to sleep and won't need the rocking. But, I wouldn't try to put him down when he's not ready and let him cry himself to sleep at this age.

I do understand the frustration of the rocking. We did that with our daughter (now over 2 1/2). She got to the point where she got so used to it that she wouldn't sleep without it. THen we hit the point at which she realized what I was doing and would fight me (she would wiggle in my arms to prevent me from being able to rock her to sleep). So, at 3 am she'd wake up. And where before rocking her would do it, she would start to fight me and I'd end up with a screaming unhappy baby in the middle of the night. So we ended up having to do the cry it out thing and I hated it.

It was then that I read about the self-soothing, self putting to sleep techniques that she would have learned if I had put her down while she was sleepy enough to go to sleep after being put down but not so sleepy that she was already asleep. I read that whatever their last experience is before going to sleep is what they'll expect when they wake up, unless the baby put herself to sleep and then she'll be able to go back to sleep on her own. So, if you rocked the baby, the baby will expect to be rocked and can't go back to sleep without it. If the baby went to bed with a bottle, then the baby will have to have a bottle to go back to bed. Same thing, I think with pacifiers, sometimes, although our little guy isn't as hooked on them so he doesn't wake up needing one.

Unfortunately, we made that bottle mistake with my 2 1/2 year old when she was little and sometimes now she wakes up between 1 and 3 am absolutely having to have a cup before she goes back to bed. We weaned her of the middle of the night pacifier, but not the cup (sighs).

I'm hoping it goes easier with my new little guy. He's 3 months old and he's been doing pretty well at going to sleep when put down sleepy. I don't want to have to go through that cry it out thing (and I know some people are against it)

I've also read that having a bedtime routine helps them wind down and realize it's bedtime.

First, I know it can "get old" now, but my children are now 19, 16 and 7 and let me tell you, I would give anything to be able to go back and rock my sleepy, pajama clad babies again if I could! It doesn't take long for them to not want to be rocked anymore. Time passes so quickly even though it doesn't seem like it now. Enjoy it while you can and try to look at the big picture. I doubt that when your little one is walking down the aisle or out the door to college you are going to be wishing you had sleep trained him better, but wishing you had spent even more precious time rocking! Rock till your heart's content. I know no middle schooler who needs to be rocked to sleep, LOL.

Nancy

Are you swaddling him. Swaddling worked wonders for me during the first 5 or 6 months. I swore by it. Try that, he may just want to feel secure and swaddling may give him the security he needs.

Amy

my dd is almost ten months old and we have always either rocked or nursed her to sleep. quite often now she will go to sleep by 'herself'. we have never let her cry it out. he will not always need to be rocked to sleep so if that is what is worrying you i highly doubt that you will be rocking a 12 yr old to sleep every night;) i agree with a previous poster that building a routine is important, especially as he gets older. my dd definately thrives on the bedtime routine. i'm sorry you're so frustruated.

This is just from my personal experience, but my son loved to be swaddled. I would leave his littls arms out of it because he loves to sleep with his arms above his head. Sometimes if you swaddle them snuggly in a nice comfy blanket, when you get them to fall asleep, they will feel safer by being swaddled.

Plus, my son had a hard time sleeping flat on his back when he was little. Try to prop the bassinet mattress up so it's slanted a bit. You can get a wedge, or do what I did and just shove a pillow underneath it :p

Music does a wonder too!! I have this soundtrack of soothing music, and I play it every time my son goes to bed--to this day it still comforts him. We've made so many copies of it, because I don't know what I would do without it! I also use a small fan pointed at the door for background noise. When it was crystal quiet, my son would wake up at the slightest noise. Having the fan on helped this!

Plus, on a side note, it is never too early to try and get a routine going at "bedtime" (even though they don't know the difference between night and day yet). That is comforting to a baby as well when they start to learn and remember what comes next--so start a little routine, whatever is comfortable for you, at night time. Even if she doesn't get it yet. Like, for example, at night we would do the four "b's." Bath, Bottle, Book, Bed.


Here is the thing--when a baby is so little, say, under four months, it's about impossible to spoil them and very easy to terrify them. You may have to rock your little one for a while, but don't be afraid to try other things and to transition her to eventually sleeping by herself. But this takes time--and trust me, it goes fast! I would do anything to have my little newborn back that loved to be swaddled and rocked. :) Good luck and stay strong--you are doing the right thing!

I rock my DD (11 weeks) to almost-asleep mode... then I put her in the crib. She usually gets a little more alert at this sudden change in environment, but then I stand there and "shhhhhh" and put my hand on her chest to provide some comfort.

I also have a pillow that's about 18" long and is curved slightly. I place it at the top of her head so she can "snuggle" into it and feel a little more protected. It fit perfectly in the bassinet and makes the crib seem a little less "big kid."

After a few minutes at her side "shhhh"-ing and providing a comforting "presence" she is almost asleep.

Also, because she flails so much we give her a pacifier, which causes her legs and arms to relax as she focuses on the sucking instead. Calms her right down.

Good luck!

My son did the same thing and we eventually when he was about five months old or four months old had to let him cry it out and cry himself to sleep. He cried really hard for fourty five minutes the first time and then thirty and then twenty and then five and now alway even less than five. We literally had to step outside to not hear it and it was really hard. Another thing my mom did because all of the sudden my son was not sleeping very long for naps was she turned him on his tummy. It scared the crap out of me but eventually I realized that was a big part of the problem too. He was not a back sleeper. Not many people are. He slept for hours on his tummy. I watched him like a hawk and did not sleep at all for the first two weeks of that but eventually I realized he could turn his little head and he was fine.

My DS loved to be rocked to sleep, sometimes we had to do it the whole time he slept just so he would sleep. It drove DH nuts but I told him, when he is 16, he won't want you to do it and you are going to wish you could.