kirsten07
02-07-2007, 01:31 AM
i know i have anxiety and OCD sometimes i wanna do rituals around my house but i keep myself from doing them, my problem is my thoughts, i have intrusive thoughts, i always see horrible things happening, i worry about whats gonna happen to me, i worry something medically is wrong with me. its getting annoying and sometimes when my anxiety is just slightly heightened i will feel kind of dizzy/dazed/fogged and 'crazy' like i am going to turn into some loony or do something really bad and not be able to control myself until after i do it. i worry if i talk about what bad i could do that i worry about that it will 'open up' and i will. i feel like i am very slowly getting a weird mental disorder like i can feel the onset. i am scared. i worry i will do something bad in my sleep. is this OCD and my anxiety. i am beginning to see a therapist, she seems very good, i am just wondering what is wrong with me this is just a sample of alot of my worrys.
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Sannah
02-07-2007, 09:52 AM
Hi Kirsten, sorry that you are having a hard time coping. Mental health is very precious. When I was at my worst with my anxiety I understood how sometimes my sanity was just at the edge. I am so glad that you have found a therapist whom you like! You can get your sanity back! I did through counseling. Keep posting if it helps you to feel better.
Mucho_Ocho
02-07-2007, 02:55 PM
It's good that you are seeing a therapist. I was prescribed Anafranil for OCD, and it actually works. You may want to ask your doctor if you should take this. My rituals are 90% gone and only flare up when I'm under extreme stress.
LynSkyn35
02-10-2007, 02:48 AM
Hi! I also suffer from OCD, anxiety and depression.The anxiety feeds the OCD which in turn feeds the anxiety which feeds the OCD, etc,..then the whole shibang leaves me depressed. The therapist is important, glad you found one you like. Are you on meds? Do you journal when you are having the attacks? I found journeling was the biggest help. I would (still do) write down the days events, what triggered the attack and how I felt. I would go back later and read to realize while at the time I wrote down my feelings, it was not an actual reality.I'm a nurse so I obssessed I would accidently give someone the wrong medication. I would check 3 times then go in the room, take one look at the patient and run out to check the med list again, go back in the room give the patient their meds and panic..what if?It took me 5 hours to pass 2 hours worth of meds. Which meant the bedtime meds would be overdue, adding to the stress, which caused the panic which fueled the OCD. No one around me understood why I was neurotic. I was the butt of jokes, no one would have anything to do with me. I was scared to tell them what was really going on because then I would be labled as crazy. I have since my earliest memory had OCD and anxiety..checking everynight the stove, the doors, the kids, get in bed, get out, repeat the process. Couldn't get out the driveway unless I checked all electrical appliances and ashtrays..couldn't look at them, had to touch them so I could embed in my mind I had "checked"
I finally saw a therapist a few years ago, he tried to teach me relaxation techniques but I am so high strung they wouldnt work.My doc says I should cut down on the caffiene and nicotine but a girl has to have some vices.:) I know he is right though. These feelings are "normal" for us, only fellow anxiety, OCDers will understand. Try to find a hobby you find relaxing, I knit, play computer games, read and just recently picked up drawing. If I can occupy my mind with something fun, then there is no room for the "thoughts"
I am having a bad night tonight and just writing this has helped me...a little. Its good to have someone to talk to who knows what you are going through.
I did quit that particular job and went to work at an assisted living facility where there was less stress. I'm off my Zyprexa and Klonopin but everytime I try to wean off the Zoloft I get really panicy and depressed, so currently I take 150mg of Zoloft and have xanax to help with the anxiety if I need it. Since I have suffered my whole life with this, I don't foresee ever coming off my meds completely. But now, I have more good days than bad. I now tell people why I am quirky and neurotic, my current fellow employees are very understanding .
I finally saw a therapist a few years ago, he tried to teach me relaxation techniques but I am so high strung they wouldnt work.My doc says I should cut down on the caffiene and nicotine but a girl has to have some vices.:) I know he is right though. These feelings are "normal" for us, only fellow anxiety, OCDers will understand. Try to find a hobby you find relaxing, I knit, play computer games, read and just recently picked up drawing. If I can occupy my mind with something fun, then there is no room for the "thoughts"
I am having a bad night tonight and just writing this has helped me...a little. Its good to have someone to talk to who knows what you are going through.
I did quit that particular job and went to work at an assisted living facility where there was less stress. I'm off my Zyprexa and Klonopin but everytime I try to wean off the Zoloft I get really panicy and depressed, so currently I take 150mg of Zoloft and have xanax to help with the anxiety if I need it. Since I have suffered my whole life with this, I don't foresee ever coming off my meds completely. But now, I have more good days than bad. I now tell people why I am quirky and neurotic, my current fellow employees are very understanding .
Sannah
02-10-2007, 12:12 PM
Lyn, did your upbringing cause your anxiety?
LynSkyn35
02-15-2007, 02:05 AM
Possibly, but no one event stands out. I remember my mother making me read a story about little girl who didn't pick up her toys, the house caught fire and the child tripped over a toy and was badly burned.I was maybe 8 yrs old, 30 yrs ago...from that point on I had to check and recheck all appliances, electrical sockets, pick up all toys, pray and repeat the process before I could go to bed. Around that same time, I snuck onto my grandparents' neighbor's property and stole sawdust to "cook" in my playhouse. I worried for years that I would be put in a juvinile detention home for that. I lay down in the seat of the car and prayed everytime we passed the place. I developed heart palpatations when I was around 12, I know now they were panic attacks. So, as you can see, the OCD and anxiety have been a part of my life forever and only in the last 5 yrs have I found out what was wrong.
Maybe heredity has something to do with it, my great grandmother was manic depressive, as was my grandmother (her daughter) who was also an alcoholic, my mother has been treated in the past for depression and she was mentally and physically abusive to me ( not my siblings) when I was growing up.
Maybe heredity has something to do with it, my great grandmother was manic depressive, as was my grandmother (her daughter) who was also an alcoholic, my mother has been treated in the past for depression and she was mentally and physically abusive to me ( not my siblings) when I was growing up.