This is my first post in Children's Health. We had a house fire last week. We lost all of our Living room and Master Bedroom. We don't know how "hot" the rest of the house got, just that there isn't much soot on the walls of the "good" rooms. My DD's room was unharmed. However, our insurance adjuster is telling us that ALL plastics in the house should be disposed of. This is INCLUDING my 3 year-old's toys!! A few were in the "bad" rooms and I totally understand that. The rest were safe. They are claiming toxins could have formed/landed in the plastic. I don't want to put my child at risk, and I have another on the way...but am I being wasteful about the toys? She has BIG Little Tikes stuff (we got at yard sales and are HARD to find to replace), and all kinds of little toys and games. I am willing to junk the stuff, but feel so wasteful if it is okay. I am at the point of tears all the time for my little girl. She has also asked us to go home repeatedly throughout this process. I have been telling her the house is "broken" and needs to be fixed. I even let her see the OUTSIDE of the the house so that she could see it boarded up and plastic covered. She didn't see any burnt parts, and seemed to really understand better. We are living in an apartment temporarily, but will last up to 6 months. Any suggestions on how to help her through this, or reassurance that I am doing the right thing with her toys will be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

First let me say how sorry I am for what you are going through. Next let me say that if it were me, I would get rid of the toys. I know it seems wasteful, but fires create their own "weather" basically. A fire can create wind, and even if the fire didn't reach some of the rooms, the smoke was blown throught the house. And the smoke contains the toxins from the things that were destroyed.

As for helping your DD, she's young and she'll be fine. She takes her cues from you, though, so if you are upbeat, and act as if it's no big deal, she'll follow suit. If she see's you upset all the time, and stressed, she'll internalize that. You obviously are going to be stressed and upset, just try not to do it around her. Good Luck...

Lisa--Thanks! Yeah, we were going to get rid of them anyway, b/c of the possibility of toxins. She is doing well, and so am I. Both of us (and my DH) are very tired. I am just so worn out. I am glad it is Friday so that I can sleep in tomorrow!! LOL! Then I get to go shopping for stuff we are lacking right now. Our refrigerator is practically bare, and it is usually over stuffed. I have kept upbeat for her sake. When I am alone, I have my cry...or I just think and organize things. Thanks again. It is nice to know that I am doing the right thing here. I just didn't want everyone to think I was being wasteful.

I too think that trashing them is the right thing to do. You just never know what exactly could be on those toys now. I also wanted to tell you how sorry I am that you are having to go through this. I personally haven't had a fire, but my aunt did a while back, and it really hit home hard with me. Hang in there and I hope each day get's easier for all of you!

Is your local Red Cross helping you? There are also groups within the community that help fire victims, perhaps local churches or shelters. For instance, we have a local thrift shop here where the toys are 20 cents a piece.
I know the Red Cross here also gives gift certificates to Wal-Mart. Maybe yours does too.

I might even go directly to Wal-mart or other Department stores and explain the situation and see if they can offer assistance with toys anyway. I know JCPenney replaced the entire wardrobe of my flower girl who lost her dress, shoes, slip, etc (for my wedding) in a tornado.

You might also go the local bank to see if they will set up a fire relief fund for your family, they announce it on the local news, then anyone in the community can donate.

Another thought is the Toys For Tots program. I know they usually help at Christmas but it might be worth a phone call to check. The Salvation Army also has a refurbished toys program.

Hope this helps. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Yesmetoo

I am so sorry for your loss. I am so glad that everyone made it out OK.

You have gotten some great advice here and I just had one more thing to add.

Just keep in mind, you are not throwing out perfectly good toys. These are not things that could be cleaned up and salvaged. They could be harmful to your daughter & you are doing the right thing. I breaks my heart to think of having to throw out my 4 year olds toys. She loves each and everyone of them. But I would have to do the same thing if I were in your situation.


My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

Kim

Yesmeto--thanks for the advice. Yes, I have contacted Walmart and they donated 5 new toys for her. She is still oblivious to the whole thing, thankfully. We have gotten donations (money, giftcards) through our church, and community. It has actually amazed us. Even our Real Estate Agent sent us a 100 dollar check!! We just bought the house 1 1/2 ago, so she felt really bad!

Kim-- Sorry it took awhile to get back, we have been very busy with organizing things. We did replace her train and her dollhouses. We just had to. We are awaiting their arrival in the mail.

:angel: We did call Little Tikes (or my MIL did for me--I am expecting baby # 2 and I also have anxiety issues). They did not offer to donate (probably b/c everything was discontinued--most stuff we got at yard sales), but they did send us a list with all the original prices for the stuff to give to our insurance company. This way we can get reimbursed (of course they take off depreciation value!). I did find her a great deal on an auction site for her 2 dollhouses and also got her a new train set. She is just thrilled. She missed that stuff so much (she had just gotten it for Christmas). We are very blessed, and grateful. God has been good to us, and we know this happened for a reason. It will become clear at some point. Thanks for your thoughts and prayers!