mugz99
02-08-2007, 11:08 PM
Hi, I'm a 23y male and I have had a long history of mental illness. I have over the years suffered from social anxiety, panic attacks, bulimia, depression, substance abuse, chronic fatigue, ADD and BPD. And recently a thought has occured to me. What is more likely, that I have suffered from each one of these disorders independently, or that each one of the disorders is the result of a single disorder manifesting itself in different ways? Although I have overcome bulimia, panic attacks, and substance abuse I still have residual feelings of mild depression and social anxiety, with the addition now, of unprovocated bouts of despair where my emotions are jumbled and unclear. During which I feel the weight of the worlds problems. So much so, that all I can do is lay on my back and stare at the ceiling, wanting to explode but not having the will to do so. I feel over weight while I'm emptying all at once. It's the ultimate feeling of blaahhhh-AAAAHHHHH!! Does anyone have any insight into *** is going on. I've never been suicidal, and I've never had a manic episodes. I'm at a complete loss as to what kind of disorder might manifest itself in so many different ways. Any advice or suggestions you might have would be very much appreciated. Thanx.
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Sannah
02-09-2007, 09:45 AM
Mugz, congrats on overcoming bulemia, substance abuse, and panic attacks. This is a HUGE accomplishment! You have never been manic and they diagnosed you with Bipolar? Unresolved anxiety can cause depression. Do you think that maybe all of this started with anxiety?
mugz99
02-10-2007, 03:54 PM
Thank you for your reply. And no I haven't been diagnosed bipolar, I'm just trying to figure out what would cause me to exhibit such a wide range of symptoms. And why I feel transient bouts of really intense depair for no apparent reason. It might be anxiety causing it, but then whats causing the anxiety? I also wonder why sometimes I can't make myself shut up even when I want to. From what I read about bipolar disorder it said hypomania and mania last for long periods of time. My symptoms never last more than a few hours, but they do tend to happen a few days in a row. Thanx again for the reply.
avinitinatt
02-10-2007, 07:03 PM
You sound like your main issue is anxiety. Bullimia, panic,depression, substance abuse etc... are all symptoms of an anxiety disorder, they are just all the different ways someone can react when they are suffering with anxiety. I have suffered many different illness myself, they are all illnesses in their own right, but they all stem from the same place, hope this makes sense x
mugz99
02-10-2007, 09:24 PM
Thanx for the reply. Yeah that makes sense. But to make sure I understand you properly, your saying that anxiety is the issue more than likely, and that the cocaine abuse, bulimia, and panic attacks have been different avenues for dealing with it? Do you know if anxiety can cause seemingly random episodes of despair? These episodes are what brought me to this forum. I had always been able to deal with the panic attacks despite how terrible they felt, but these feelings of utter hopelessness and jumbled thoughts REALLY get to me. I appreciate the input, it's nice talking with someone who actually understands what I'm feeling.
Sannah
02-11-2007, 10:44 AM
Mugz, anxiety sucks. Of course it can cause despair. You asked what is causing the anxiety? How was your upbringing?
mugz99
02-12-2007, 03:06 PM
My mother was an meth addict and my father was an abusive alcoholic up until I was 5. But after that they both straightened out their lives and I had a fairly stable home from 5 and on. My mom is a little manipulative but loving, and my dads a good person but he was never around. My finacee was killed a few years back, but if anything I think my anxiety improved after her passing. Hope that is insightful in some way. And I really do appreciate your posts =)
Sannah
02-12-2007, 03:53 PM
Hi mugz, I am so glad that your parents recovered from their addictions. Your life must have really improved after that? Manipulative people can be harmful, however, and your dad was still absent. Are you currently working on the anxiety in therapy?
pmw3805
02-24-2007, 02:39 AM
Some of what you are describing does sound a bit like bipolar. My husband has bipolar, and a lot of what you mention, he goes through. He used to use illegal drugs(self medicate), which is what a lot of people do who have bipolar. He also has bouts of anxiety and says he has no idea why, has racing thoughts, feels like he has to solve everyones problems, and the list just goes on. You may want to seek a professional, bipolar can be treated with a couple combinations of meds. Hang in there,(if that is what you have) because it has taken my husbands DR. about a year to adjust his meds in the just the right combination and dosage. Also if that is what you decide to do, is seek professional help, ask a lot of questions about the DR and make sure they know A LOT about mental illness'
GriffSS
09-14-2007, 04:58 AM
It's called growing up. The process of realization. Not trying to be a smartass,
because I've been there myself. We're all different, but we're all human beings
going through the lifelong process of realization and self-discovery, We live on an evil planet, man. Hehehe. No ****. Evil Earth--Evil people. It's bleak
but it's all been foretold. Read the Bible. God Bless Mugz.
GriffSS
because I've been there myself. We're all different, but we're all human beings
going through the lifelong process of realization and self-discovery, We live on an evil planet, man. Hehehe. No ****. Evil Earth--Evil people. It's bleak
but it's all been foretold. Read the Bible. God Bless Mugz.
GriffSS