I thought I had my feelings all sorted out about this. I was wrong. I held myself together at the appt., but lost it on the way home.

He said every Lupus test came back very high. Also, rheumatoid arthritis tests were positive. I have Mixed Connective Tissue Disease, an overlap of Lupus and Rheumatoid Arthritis. I kind of knew this from the first appt., however when he went over all of the testing he did a little piece of me inside didn't want to hear this.

According to the doc, they're treated almost the same. I'm on 10 mg. of Prednisone already, and now he gave me a choice. Start with MTX and then add Plequnil next time, or start them both now. I opted for just MTX. He was happy with that because he prefers to slowly add in medications, and likes to start off low-dose because this is a long term disease so chances are I'll always be on medications.

Although I'm not a big drinker, I do like to socially have a couple of cocktails. Now that I know I'm on MTX and can't have any, I'm bummed about it. Weird, cause I didn't think that would bother me. But we have a lot of friends, and we go out to listen to bands/dance or out to dinner with wine or martinis. I don't want to be the only one sitting there without. Crazy, but I'm kind of flipping over this.

I'm also worried about MTX and feeling sick after taking it. That seems to be a common thing I've read. I work Mon - Thurs. So I'm trying to decide when to take it. If I take it on Thurs. night, will I be sick and ruin every weekend? If I take it on a Sunday night so I have my weekends, will that make me sick and not want to be at work? (I love my job, and love going to work) What's the answer? I'm so confused. My husband is trying to deal with this, and at this point isn't very understanding. According to him, "his life is screwed up now". How nice of him... So, if I get sick and mess up the weekends we have together, He'll go over the edge. Any advice????

Sorry for my whining. I guess I'm just trying to sort this all out so that I can deal with it and move on. :rolleyes:

Dear NHCasey, I'm sorry you got the MCTD Dx, but I'm glad in the sense that you'll now get meds, follow-ups, etc. that you really do need. And I know EXACTLY what you mean about expecting the news but still being shocked. I walked out of my first appt. with my final rheumie in a total daze, head swimming, memories flying, and new fears abounding.

About your hubby's reaction: I don't honestly believe that ONLY men do this. Mine did, too, but mainly in the several yrs. prior to my Dx during which I knew lupus was a strong possibility. The key thing to remember, though, is that you are only now starting full treatment! So he really isn't seeing that you now have a huge opportunity to improve. And maybe YOU can't really see this as a possibility yet, either... Personally? I thought I'd ALWAYS feel like crap :D. And, yes, I was proven wrong.

I am ashamed to admit that a few years after I was Dx'ed, my husband had a big health scare and that my first thought was "I [note the "I"] don't need this!" We were already up to our ears in family sorrows & I was so tired... Fortunately, I was able to "auto-correct" quickly, as I knew from my own ordeal how OFF my self-centered reaction was. Human, all too human...!

Maybe you can find a way to suggest, kindly but clearly, that while first-blush reactions are OK, you'll need his full support for your feeling-better phase. And maybe you can remind him that life is only really "ruined" when it's OVER---and that you are a LONG way from that.

I've never taken Methotrexate, so I hope others here will also post soon. I'll say bye for now with all my best wishes to you, Vee
P.S. HANG IN THERE!

I second Veej's post. I think you and hubby both need a little time for this to settle in. I am hoping the MTX does it's thing and you will feel much better soon:) . As for the occassional drink, a lot of the popular drinks can be modified and made without alchohol, i do that because I don't handle alchohol(sp? lupus moment) well.

Thanks for the feedback.

I had a chuckle, Vee, at your response to your husband's scare. I'm sure I'd do the same thing too. I guess it's natural. I'm trying to cut him some slack because life has changed for "us". BUT, I wanted to rip his head off yesterday, lol.

I guess I am also fortunate to have a dx early on. Right, lol?

Have a nice night all....off to acupuncture. (I'm trying everything!!)