ok i have a question about my metabolism. i became anorexic last may and by sept/oct i was so severely emaciated and sick i could barely walk. i had to stop working because i could barely function. although i was advised to go into the hospital i wanted to try "recovery" on my own (well with a support team). i saw a nutritionist and we began working on upping my calories. i started out small, increasing a little more every week. within a couple months i was still nowhere near an average amount of calories that a normal person eats but i gained weight. i freaked out from gaining on so little still but my nutrionist believed i would drop back down and to keep upping. alot of major life changes were going on in my life and i freaked out and stopped increasing my calories. for the past few months i have remained at a low number of calories (still not near normal) and my weight has stayed the same.

i am scared that since i have only been eating this certain amount of calories for months that my body has now become used to it. i have maintained at this weight for awhile now and although i am still underweight i am petrified of what will happen if i were to ever eat an average amount of calories. i know i need to gain and i know its stupid of me to be scared but i gained on so little and maintained on so little. i am so confused. have i totally messed up my metabolism?

Well, everyone is different, so what I'm telling you is just my experience and may not necessarily be yours. I have been recovered for about 5 years now.

I also should have been inpatient, my weight was so very low and I was quite ill, but somehow, I did it without going inpatient. I didn't even have a dietician at first, so basically, in the beginning, I did not count calories at all. I gained weight and quickly, which was scary, but the nice thing was I was soon eating a regular number of calories without being a slave to calorie counting. I'm not sure it was the smartest thing to do but basically I went from anorexic calorie restriction and counting and overexercise to no calorie counting (ate the meals my mom cooked, didn't purge them, had snacks such as protein shakes a couple times a day too). Now, in the beginning, this was hard as I said, I gained weight quickly, probably to the middle of the normal range for my height. I felt fat and disgusting and ugly, but really, it wasn't too severe. This was over a period of about 3-4 months.

For the next 6 months to a year, my metabolism was shoddy, at best, but I continued eating normally. I really think that was the key, to just keep feeding my body normal amounts of calories and cease all ED behaviors. At about the 6 month mark, I started moderate exercise--very light exercise like walking (at a normal pace) for maybe half an hour if that just a few days a week. That seemed to kick my metabolism up. After about a year, my weight settled into the low-normal range for my height and has not moved except for a bad reaction to birth control pills which gave me severe water retention, so I had to stop the birth control pills and that problem went away.
Now, I eat normally, exercise a few days a week but much lower intensity than with the ED and do a little weight lifting. I feel much better all around.

I really think the key for me was just upping the calorie amount to normal levels in the beginning. You maybe should consult a second dietician and see about moving your calorie intake to normal. No doubt you will gain weight at first, but eventually, I think that is the key to getting your metabolism back to normal, not subsisting on too few calories. Too little calories slows the metabolism which means you gain weight with fewer additional calories. In addition, you might see about getting your thyroid checked. It has a lot to do with metabolism and can be affected by weight gain or loss.

Good luck! Please do try to stick to recovery and don't be a slave to calorie-counting because that is truly miserable.

The answer to your question is yes, an ED does slow down your metabolism, BUT only temporarily. When you begin increasing your calorie intake your body will regain rapidly because it's used to being starved. And because of eating very little for so long your metabolic rate has really slowed down. But once you have reached a healthy weight and are eating the amount of calories your body needs your metabolism will speed up again and you will be able to eat normally and maintain a healthy weight. I know how scary it is. I've been in your shoes but have maintained a healthy weight now for over a year and basically eat what I want, when I want, with a moderate amount of exercise. I gained weight very fast too when I first started to eat more. Also you have to think, your body is probably dehydrated too, so alot of the weight gain is more than likely water. And when you starve your body, you also lose alot of muscle. So when you regain the weight you also build your muscle back up too which weighs more than fat so that can also contribute to the rapid weight gain. I would really really recommend that you see a therapist. Cognitive therapy (changing the way you think and percieve things) is very important when recovering from an ED. An ED can have such a strong grip on the way you think, that is can be very difficult to change that. Therapy is really helpful. Anyway, I wish you the best and I hope I helped relieve your fears a little bit. Recovering from an ED is challenging and it's alot of hard work. But it's so worth it when you are recovered and are able to live a normal life again. You can do it, believe in yourself and be strong! Good luck!

thank you both for your advice. you two are very inspirational! i want to be free of this damn ED! it has truly taken over my life and destroyed it but i am going to stick with recovery and try my hardest to get through it all. i do have an appointment to see a therapist (who specializes in eating disorders) this friday and i cant wait!! i've been to 4 different ones so far and they had no clue about eating disorders. its been very frustrating. but i'm hoping this new one works out. thanks again for replying.