Edge of insanity
I have been to the edge of insanity
In a passage of a minute I found myself hanging by my fingertips
Its darkness called to me, telling me to let go
Above me the fires of reality raged
I screamed in pain, closing my eyes, wishing it was all nightmare
but reality persists and it is a nightmare.

I looked down, the darkness is so warm and inviting
to let go and never to have to worry or feel the pain
I could escape reality
Oh how i wished I could let go.

Then a hand reaches down and touches mine.
it is a small hand, barely big enough to grip a finger
I look up, and I see the big brown eyes of my son
more hands grip mine, through my tears I can see my children.

I cannot let go, they need me
They too are being hurt by reality
They have lost a brother, shall they lose me as well.

So I stand on the edge,
I find my strength in my children
Each day that passes, the call of the darkness gets weaker
There are days When I feel overwhelmed,
but those days come less frequently now.

436 days have passed.

We love you Zac, and we miss you.

Thank you so much for such a sensitive, touching poem.
I grieve with you in the loss of your son.
May your gift with words AND your living children bring you back from the edge.

That was a beautiful poem. I too Loss my son and I feel like that alot. It's been 11 months for me and each day is still an uphill battle