well as previously mentioned, I saw a psychologist Thursday evening to assit with my eating disorder and some grief and loss issues underlying the ED. I thought that the session went well; however, I am having a really hard time this evening. It seems like all that we discussed is taking its toll on me emotionally this evening. I've been crying for the last hour and just feel emotionally drained. I have another appt scheduled for this coming Tuesday evening. I am going to go to the appt. I just wanted to let everyone know how the session went and how I'm currently feeling.

Hey there. I am so happy to hear that the appointment went well.

I understand that discussing these difficult issues can be very upsetting because it does make you think about it more, and--up until this point--you have been trying to forget. That is what the eating disorder does: it helps you cope.

Hopefully, with the help of therapy, you will begin to deal with these issues that are upsetting to you and learn how to cope with them in healthier ways: without using the eating disorder for support.

Although you may not believe so right now, it is actually great that you have managed to uncover these underlying issues so early in your treatment. You and your therapist can now begin the "real work" part of therapy. I have talked to people who have spent months--even years--just to get to the point that you are at right now. And yes, it is normal to feel the way that you do right now.

So, just do whatever you can to make it til Tuesday: read a book, talk to friends, see a movie, etc. You will be just fine. Keep your chin up!

It sounds like you are doing very well, and you should be very proud of yourself for taking this step. GREAT JOB!!!

Take care!!!

Congrats on taking a big first step! It can be very draining to face the underlying issues, but, on the other hand, at least you do have some underlying issues to face and work through. I still do not know what caused my ED. There possibly could have been sexual abuse by an uncle, but if it happened, I was very young at the time and don't remember it. The best I could come up with is that I grew up with an angry, controlling father. He was always verbally abusive (though never about my weight/appearance), and sometimes he hit. So I didn't feel I had much control over my life growing up. It really didn't seem my situation at home was bad enough to warrant an ED, but most of us who suffer are also perfectionists, and maybe my personality and my depression combined with my home situation was enough to trigger my ED.

As the PP said, many people are in therapy for months/years just trying to identify the underlying causes. And sometimes, there do not seem to be underlying causes to work through.

Do something nice for yourself as a reward: see a movie, take a bubble bath & burn some candles, buy a new book or CD.

Scarlet, I think it's great you began therapy. It can be a long road, but I'm sure you'll find it rewarding. I see my therapist on Thursday evenings and there have been many Fridays where I broke out in tears at work for seemingly no reason. I've called my therapist on a few of those Fridays and he reminded me that we are working through some really tough issues. A lot of long dormant issues are being acknowledged and they can stir up all kinds of emotions. I believe it is part of the healing process. The important thing to know is that you are healing and you will get better. If I can do this, anyone can. :)