In the weeks following detox from sub, the physical part has gone and I feel well. I seem to be a little prone to some definite mood swings. I am also experiencing very vivid dreams, about illicit drug use, and its driving me mad!
is it because my body is recovring, but my mind dosent wanna give in as well?
Its not that i am craving, its just vivid dreams of using....anybody help?

Hello Withdrawals

I can not speak to sub personally because I have never used it. However, I did come off of oxycodone, and the withdrawals are similar. The sub does contain an opiate, so our withdrawals are similar in that we both have come off an opiate. What you are descibing in the way of mood swings is a perfectly normal course in any opiate withdrawal. A hard part, to be sure, but perfectly normal. It is depression and anxiety that you seem to be experiencing. This is something we all go through after withdrawal, so please know you are 'normal' for your circumstances. Truly.

To combat the depression and anxiety, there are some tried and true measures to take. Some form of exercise is first and foremost. Moving around to the greatest degree that you can... exercise, walking, climbing up and down the stairs, whatever... and the more you can do it outside in the sunshine, the better. Also, something to help your brain as it works to restore itself to produce once again the needed 'feel good' chemicals that is part of its natural job.... my tendency would be to start with some natural products. I take 4 Omega 3 Fish Oil (1000 mgs each) per day. This was originally suggested to me by my family doctor for heart health and to lower cholesterol. However, a lesser known property of the fish oil is that it is alos a mood stabilizer. Other's have also used St John's wart and other natural products for depression and anxiety. I am sure someone will jump in here soon and share their knowledge of them with you as I have very limited knowledge here.

I want to be honest and tell you that I have been on an antidepressant for years (currnetly a maintanence dosage of Lexapro). I have been on antidepressants since long before I came off the oxycodone. I am not even close to the point where I am ready to come off the antidepressant. Far, far down the road in my life. ( I have to first finish a current taper from xanax and then tackle smoking). However, in all honesty, Had I not been on an antidepressant before starting the oxycodone taper, I would have given more natural products a shot first. Actually, I am using many natural products to the extent that they do not cause a problem interacting with the Lexapro ( such as no St John's Wart while on an antidepressant). Then, if, after giving natural products a shot for a month to six weeks, there is not marked improvement, I would think about an antidepressant with no qualms at all.

As far as the dreams... while I did not personally experience them, from all I have read here, it is very common occurrence. They do seem to be tormenting and I am sorry you are dealing with them. However, it seems that eventually they do fade away, so there is much hope in this for you.

Stay strong... read far back into the pages of postings and learn, learn, learn. Many have gone before you and there stories are full of advice and hope.

All best wishes
reach

the dreams are totally normal. alcohol and drug use dampens the dreaming mechanism....they rob you of your dreams, literally and figuratively. REM sleep is decreased almost to zero and that's why sleep during drinking/drugging periods is not restful and deep, and why one is always tired.

as for the subject matter of the dreams, it's only natural that you'd dream about the things you think most about when conscious. i am having this exact same problem. every night i am dreaming about getting high, and wake up to realize i don't have any. but right now i feel quite happy about not having any. i smoked weed every day for two years and right now i just feel i have been let go from a very taxing, demanding job that paid me nothing and only took from me. but i know this feeling could be fleeting and i could be back to the same old thing in a few days, wks, or months, so i am just trying to figure out how to structure my life to keep me from using or even having the choice to do so.

W/Dare hard - Both the responses are right on the money. I paticularly agree with the lack of rem sleep and you are now probably regaining that. If you tried to remember you probably did not have many if any dreams let alone vivid one when you were on the opieat. So as curious as this may be 'congradulations!' you are getting to be one normal drug free person. How long were you on the sub? T.J

I had my first drug dream last night as well...I was trying to stop people from taking oxycontin! Not sure what it means but it was weird. My dreams the last 3 days have been extremely vivid, exciting, strange and complex. I am on my 18th day since my last opiate. I am starting to see some results and am going to meetings/rehab almost everyday.
Keep going withdrawls...you can do it.

Hi Reach! I hope you are doing well. You are such a sweet and thoughtful person. I hear you on the anti depressents and smoking. I just got on Remeron and am not even considering dropping cigs right now.

As always, bless all those who post here!
dg

In the weeks following detox from sub, the physical part has gone and I feel well. I seem to be a little prone to some definite mood swings. I am also experiencing very vivid dreams, about illicit drug use, and its driving me mad!
is it because my body is recovring, but my mind dosent wanna give in as well?
Its not that i am craving, its just vivid dreams of using....anybody help?

hi withdrawls are hard

I had a minor slip the end of my 90 days clean and sober. As a result of that, I had some pretty heavy using dreams last week, I woke up in a soppy sweat and thought about pursueing what I was doing in the nitemares but I didn't pursue or go on the hunt, I was just happy I didn't do it, then the next night, the flood-gates opened- I had a stronger using dream, it was so real, I had to give myself a recall and ask myself if this really happened and what I actually did the nite before. Sleeping. OK.

I don't think using dreams will come true if you are strong in your recovery. If you go about thinking you can control the drugs there is a slight chance you will go about chasing your nitemare in your waking state, how insane is that? I have done that but not this time around.

Using dreams could be like a blessing, asking you about your strength and your support groups, asking you, do you know without a doubt what will happen to you if you use again???

"Just for Today I will try to get a better perspective of my life."

t/c
kadee

I have been off crystal meth for almost 9 years and still dream I have a little bottle full in my purse. I never actually take it (in my dream) but I pull it out and look at it. Its nice to know I'm not alone.

In the weeks following detox from sub, the physical part has gone and I feel well. I seem to be a little prone to some definite mood swings. I am also experiencing very vivid dreams, about illicit drug use, and its driving me mad!
is it because my body is recovring, but my mind dosent wanna give in as well?
Its not that i am craving, its just vivid dreams of using....anybody help?

When I came off methadone I totally had them all the time. I have been off all of that for over five years now and still occasionally have the dreams but now I don't get high in them usually. Sometimes I do but I rarely have them. They got less over time. I really had to just simply dismiss any dream as just a dream and that was all and that too would pass with time and healing. It is just a dream. I know very real it seems but in fact it is not. Keep it simple. I know to get better we have to do a lot of analyzing of our souls and life and ways ect....but there is a point where we really need to be able to realize what is in our control and what is not. We also need to know when to analyze and when not to.....everything does not have a meaning. To each their own.

I was hooked on METH for about 3 yrs When I finally decided it was going to kill me if I did not stop,I quit with the help from friends and family.I had Vivid using dreams every night for about a year.I always did the drug in my dreams.I would wake up thanking god I did not really do it.After that year I rarely have them and I seem to be able to wake myslf when I do.I wish you luck,It is a long hard road,but you can do it

Ive had these dreams before ..after methadone detox etc..caught me by surprise after sub though. After taking it for a couple years, it started to seem very mild, and i started to forget, I guess, the nature of the drug.
For everyone on sub and those thinking of using it, Im here to say...im experiencing the same after effects from the sub as methadone, heroin or even, pain pills. Very interesting for a drug that is supposed to be such a wonder, it is while your on it, but quitting can be just as difficult as anything
else. whats will the dr.'s in all their infinite wisdom come up with next?

Oh dreams, that wonderful escape for the brain while the body rests. They can be wonderful and relaxing then horrifying and anxiety producing. I have had dreams these past few weeks that left me feeling as if I had not slept in a year, now that felt like poo :yawn:

I have found most of the time it is what you had on your mind before drifting off to sleep. In fact after an especially long day in which I spent most of my time on these boards reading not only through this forum but others, I dreamed all night long of posting and reading these boards. So needless to say I didn't have to actually come to the board that day because my brain had spent enough time here even if it was while I was sleeping :D

Interesting thing the ole brain can be and when you add withdrawal (to any substance) into the mix "interesting" just does not seem to do the process justice but I am not quite sure what word would....

Well I guess one way to look at it is....as long as your dreaming your brain is still working, even though some of those dreams may make you wish it wasn't. So in closing, I wish you good dreams that keep you on track and leave you feeling rested and happy :)
Remember.......
Never lose hope and stay positive
Snoop

Using dreams are part of recovery. Anytime we let go of something that was so important to us, we long for it in some way. This comes in the form of urges, and dreams. We do not have to use again as a result of either.

The most important thing is to discuss the urges or using dreams with someone else in recovery. When you have one of these, an urge or a dream - do not let the day pass without discussing it with your 12-Step sponsor or the equivalent. It is also important to realize that urges, and dreams pass. That no one ever died as a result of an urge. That no one has to use as a result of a dream or urge.

For me recovery means being clean and sober. Before I got that way, if I used a drug in any form it just continued to feed the fire and I got nowhere anyway. It was only after getting clean and sober that eventually the urges became very very infrequent and very very weak.

Even the dreams have changed - I almost never use in a dream any longer. I encounter drugs and then tell people in the dream that I don't do that anymore. Or I have a dream where I am afraid I might have used and will have to stand up as a newcomer in my meetings, then realize that I did not use after all (realize this within the dream). Those are the kinds of dreams I have nowadays, having been clean and sober for many years.

Eventually your psyche and your waking mind will become one - if you stay clean and sober.

Thanks everybody for the views and the words of encouragement. Last couple nights have been using dream free and I am feeling like the worst
of it is behind me now. Those dreams were truly terrifing, because its so far from where i want to be. Since I have no sponsor to talk to currently, In have been using these posts as my outlet, to get things off my chest and to get some really great feedback. Im hoping my waking mind hurries up and melts with the subconscious soon podee, but seems like it may be a long process, and I hope I have the fortitude to withstand temptation in the meantime. I guess its all good, like you so eloquently put it snoop, my brain is still working even though god knows ive tried unsucessfully to shut it down for years....I guess maybe it just wasnt meant to be. Thanks all of you,

Withdrawals.....good to see your post. Been thinking about you and wondering if you are really doing ok?? Are you nearing time to go home?
Never lose hope and stay strong!
Snoop

I had a crazy dream last night!!! Maybe not a typical 'using' dream but most definitely a dream about drugs. My addiction started at a very early age due to severe menstual cramps that were "cured" by prescription pain killers. My addiction escalted out of control for many years, too many, in fact. It was painful=( My absolute biggest fear in the ENTIRE world is that my precious daughter would ever have to fight these evil demons that I fight everyday. I am truly terrified for her. I try to keep up on the teen drug epidemic although my daughter is 12. (can't start too early, huh?) I recently read an article about what is called "a candy bowl party". The kids go to their parents medicine cabinets and look for certain types of drugs (they are given a list of the types of med.s to look for in order to obtain the best "high") They then get together and pour all the pills into a bowl and pass it around selecting whatever pills they like best. Scared me to death!!!
So what was my dream about last night?... the picture that I keep seeing over and over again in my mind is of my daughter holding the bowl with one hand and a handful of pills in the other. I'm having trouble typing right now just thinking abou it. I want to protect my baby from all of this SO bad but I know that I can't. I'll educate her the best I can and keep the lines of communication as open as I possibly can. I'll watch diligently for signs of anything that would imply she is using drugs.
The kicker though?... when my daughter started her period last year she was having a lot of problems w/ heavy bleeding and cramping as well. I took her to the doctor and quess what they suggested? A prescription for Vicodin! I was SO angry that it took everything I had not to hit the doctor! And people wonder why we are facing the prescription drug epidemic that we are today... please!
Anyway, this situation w/ my daughter has helped me realize how absolutely impairitive it is that I stay clean.

Withdrawals.....good to see your post. Been thinking about you and wondering if you are really doing ok?? Are you nearing time to go home?
Never lose hope and stay strong!
Snoop

Boy do I feel special! thanks snoop. I really am feeling good and am really ready to get home, to dry land...about two more weeks still, doing a double hitch, will have been 10 weeks since I was last home. I miss my kids so much!
And they keep me plenty busy while home these days. Your positivity is a inspiration to me, im much more pessimistic by nature. U take care, I always look for your posts as well. bye,

withdrawls are hard, just wanted to pop in here real quick and let you know that I've been watching your story as well... in all honesty- your story played a HUGE role in my decision NOT to take sub. Wanted to make sure you know that. Thanks buddy.:)

Thanks for sharing Jkm...I am so glad that my sharing counted for something,
It is definitly all worthwhile, if somehow by sharing my suffering I was able to spare somebody the same misery. Thank you. Makes my day! I agree with you about the kids, mine are absolutly what keeps me motivated to stay clean, without them I doubt I would be where i am today, they give me so much...I just want to be able to give back to them even a small portion of what theyve given me. I will probably never be able to tell them that they very likely saved my life and they will never know just how much they motivated me and still do to be the role model they deserve. I have similar concerns about the genetic side of this disease we have, but dont know how much stock i put into it because as far as I know Im the only addict in the family. Let us lead by example, and hopefully they will follow.....my thoughts are with you all and the rest who are still struggling with our illness.