Well girls I had a feeling anyway just dident want to say it out loud.Just got the call this time it was early and still BFN.Well I appreciate all ur support if I dident get a BFP after this great cycle then I dont know what else to say.I am at work and I am trying to hold back my tears.I am praying hard for u Kari make us proud tomorrow.

Stephaine I pray this is it for u.Good luck girl.

Mapia

Mapia

I am so sorry ........my heart goes out to you ....can t you call Dh and leave from work?
It s so unfair...........i wish i could do or say something to make you feel better. I am sure that your turn will come. You re a strong and wonderful woman just dont give up sweet.
Sending you big cuddly hugs.

Amy

Mapai, I am so sorry. I'm sad along with you, I hate when my girls don't get their well deserved BFPs. It just isn't fair. I don't understand why we are all put through this. Sending you a HUGE cyber (((hug))).

Lori

Oh Mapia.

I am so so sorry for you. My heart is breaking right now because i know how much you wanted this to work and we all did too. we all prayed so hard, i even broke out those new rosary beads and thought it might help. i am just so sad for you. I know you have Greece to look forward to and being back where you are most happy. i hope you can get through this day and go home to be with DH and spend some time together. we're all here if you need us. Please take care of yourself and DH.

Mapia sweetie I am so sorry. I was really hoping this was it for you. Hang in there honey, remember what you tell me, it takes a little longer with donor sperm. It IS GOING TO HAPPEN FOR YOU!!! Please please please hang in there and don't give up. I know it is hard expecially since this was # 7 but it will work, it has to, you are a great women, supportive, kind, and helpfull to all of us on thsi board and god would never deprive you someone that is so wonderful of something you want so bad, he is just waiting for the best time.
Again, I am so sorry, I am here for you, we all are.

Stephanie

Oh Mapia! I didn't want to believe it. I was hoping that you were just playing a joke on us and you were still going to post your BFP. I doubt you would do that, but I just didn't want to believe it was BFN. I'm so sorry sweetie. I really hate days like today. I wish I could give you a big hug.

Holly

Hi Mapia
I feel sorry for you. I was really hoping to see some miracles happening for all of us but sometimes we just fail to understand God's way.
Sending you a big cyber hug. Now, I'm really doubting the skills of the Shady Grove staff :mad: .

Hope you stay strong as always sweetie:angel:
Golds

Mapia,

I was so busy writing you I didn't see your post here. I was going to ask if you wanted me to post it for you on my next e-mail to you. I agree with Golds... maybe it is time for a fresh start maybe that is all you need. It may not be that that office does not have success but maybe the change is all you need. Have you asked them what there percentage success rates are for IUI in that office. Maybe you can compare it to other offices. I know you told me the other one is farther away but look at me I am traveling two hours when do have another RE right here in town. If it gets you to a BFP it may be worth a try.

I am so so sorry Mapia. I am so upset and distraught over this for you. What happen to the BFP streak we had last time.... it is time for that to happen again.

kathy

Thanks to all my girls.

Golds I am wondering the same thing about Shady Grove and they had such a great rep.Have u heard of GIVF in VA?I started off there then I heard of Shady Grove and it was so much closer so deceided to go there.I know GIVF has a great rep as well.Well if u havent u can go to their website and read some info.

Deluka thanks for being such a great friend.I will be fine and I will get through this.Just another bump in the road I will have to drive over.Thanks for wanting to post for me.:)

Mapia

Mapia, I'm so sorry! I really hoped it would be your time! Have you considered an IVF cycle? My clinic doesn't have great rates with IUI, but has fantastic IVF rates. I only bothered with one IUI when I first started seeing them and then went straight to IVF. Maybe that would bring you better luck?

Sending you lots of hugs, go home and get some rest! :angel:

I was with Washington Fertility and moved to Shady Grove as they have a good rapport but after having one fresh IVF and one FET both ended with BFNs, I am not convinced with them. I don't have any major problem except the fallopian tubes were hydrosalpinx and they advised us to get them removed so it was taken care too.

Yes, I have heard of GIVF but haven't done any success research. I will some research and share it with you unless you know alread know about them.
Lets do some research together and see we both land.
Golds

Thanks Vik.Well my RE dident recommend IVF from the begining cause I have no issues DH is sterile and we are using donor sperm.I did have a chemical pregnancy so that gave me hope.We cant afford IVF.Maybe in greece it is cheaper there.

Golds I dont know their exact success rates but most sites dont post their IUI success rates.Only IVF.I just dont know what to say anymore I am so upset and mad at the same time.I personally am not thrilled with my RE there has not once called me all these months only once when I asked for him to call me.

Mapia

Oh no Mapia, I can't even begin to tell you how incredibly sorry and sad I am right now for you :( I'm actually shaking cause I just am in such disbelief that with such a great cycle it could still end up BFN. I don't get it. It doesn't seem right and it certainly is not fair. Maybe a change of doctor is certainly what you need. I know you have Greece to look forward to, but surely getting a BFP was far and above the most important thing to you and your DH. It will be a tough afternoon... you deserve a good cry and I wish I could be there to give you a big hug and a shoulder to cry on. Please keep the faith though... it will happen, just a matter of time. Love you sweetie.

Kari

Mapia

i am sooo sooo sorry for you. I dont even know what to say. You must be devastated at this point. Just know we are all thinking of you...

-aymie

Mapia,

Im so sorry to hear you news:confused: :confused: and it makes me so angry at the same time:mad: :mad: , you trully deserved a bfp after all you have been through so far my heart really goes out to you it was looking promising with af not popping by.

I know its hard but you know the drill, dust yourself off and try again! and you will even though you dont think you have the energy to do it you will!

Thanks for keeping us updated tho must have been hard ive been thinking about you all day.

Next time eh?
Chin up:D
x

Mapia sweetie take a break, go out for dinner with DH. Its 80 degree outside so you guys can even go for a walk too. Don't give up you know that you are not alone in this battle... we are with you and will continue fighting together until we succeed.
((((hugs))))
Golds

Mapia~

I am so sorry girl. I even had a dream about you (really funny- as I have no idea what you even really look like). I guess crash and burn on my future at being a psychic.

I feel your pain, as I know how much you wanted this. Good side- there is always next cycle! You know it will happen for you!

You are in my thoughts and prayers!!! Keep your head up, girl! It can only get better!!

Laurie

Oh Mapia I really thought it was going to happen. Im so sorry. I do agree with Victoria on the IVF. I also went through a IUI the first time around and it was unsuccessful. I know that the IVF cycle is more costly,but you actually get to witness the fertilization process and that seem to give me a lot more hope. When I went through my IVF cycle in 2002 ,they removed 12 mature follicles and 6 fertilized normally. Then the doctor can actually choose the highest grade embryos to transfer and that even betters your chances. So In my opionion there is a lot of advantages of doing a IVF cycle. By the time you try all the other procedures,you could of paid for one IVF cycle and know that fertilization occured. What I was worried about was not knowing if the eggs and the sperm ever met. Also in a IUI or the other gift procedures,you have a greater chance of having more than two or three or more. Could you imagine that!! I watched a show on TLC the other night about a couple that had a set of twins and Quints. WOW!!!! Atleast in IVF they can slim that number down a bit.

Well I hope that you are doing ok. I know that it is hard. Stay strong and dont give up. Maybe a more advanced procedure would work for you. I would definitely talk to you doctor about it. Well good luck with what ever you decide to do next.

Sincerley,
April

Oh Mapia, honey I am so sorry! I was praying so hard that this would be your month, I really wanted it for you. I just get so angry with all this stupid IF, it is so not fair. Please hang in there!
Love,
cmarie

Mapia-I'm soo sorry! I'm sure you are hurting right now. I wish I could take away the pain. I'm so tired of us getting bad news. I know our time will come eventually, it's just so hard not knowing when. I hope you are doing alright. We are here for you......

carisa

Mapia,

I am really sorry for you. I pray to god to help you bear this discouraging news..But please do not lose hope..I have seen that you have the kindest words for everyone and know that you must be a wonderful person..Such a person definitely will be a mom..Trust me..I will pray for you.

cheers,
bluewhite.

Mapia
I'm so sorry to hear about your news. It's so not fari. This should have been your month. Know that we are here for you.
Sarah

Hi Mapia...I am so sorry. I feel for you so much. Hang in there, you are not alone.

Mapia honey, am just short of words, I don't know what to say, i have been so quiet and annoyed since my last bfn from my iui, I don't just know how this iui works, I feel it is waste of time/money. How far with your insurance and ivf? Don't they cover any part of it? For your RE calling you, mine never call also, last time, I had to ask them if it is against their rules to speak with him or to have him call because each time I HAVE A CONCERN AND CALL TO SPEAK WITH HIM, THE NEXT question they will ask me is what message to give him. Am not trying to be long, just take it easy even DH is with me here saying it will be ok because I just logged in, saw your post and shouted, nnoooooooo not again, mapia please no bfn and DH asked what is that and I explained, he really understands because he knows what am going through everyday.
Take it easy pleaseeeeeeee.

Lovely

Mapia, I'm so sorry! I really hoped it would be your time! Have you considered an IVF cycle? My clinic doesn't have great rates with IUI, but has fantastic IVF rates. I only bothered with one IUI when I first started seeing them and then went straight to IVF. Maybe that would bring you better luck?

Sending you lots of hugs, go home and get some rest! :angel:

Vik, I see you are in MD, which clinic are you using?

Lovely

Thank u all for ur kind words u women are truely amazing I love u all.I came home had a good cry for about an hour my eyes were swollen.Thats ok I needed it.Then DH and I went to Starbucks sat outside enjoyed the weather and talked.We deceided to take this month off for sure.Then we will see where to go from there.We might try 1 more round otherwise we will wait to go to greece.As for insurance covering IVF they dont.In greece it is much cheaper and I feel the RE's are way more compassionate then they are here.So that is my news girls.I wish nothing but BFP's on these boards all my girls deserve it.We all deserve a BFP.

Love ya all,

Mapia

Mapia, I am so sorry you got this bad news I know how devistated you must feel. I wish we all didn't have to go through this it just isn't fair. But hang in there and don't give up hope.

Just a little note of encouragement when DH and I were TTC our first child after 11 years with gyn we went to RE did 3 IUI/Bravelle cycle which all failed, No insurance coverage so ran out of money, this was in Aug so we decided to save some more money and do IVF in spring 2 months later not even trying I got preggo. So don't give up. I know how hard it is to get this bad news month after month but just hold on to your dreams.

Kelly

Mapia, sweetie I am so sorry. I can feel your heartache through your words. I just want you to know that I am thinking of you and we will still be here to support you during the time you take off. I know you haven't given up on your dream... and I know that your miracle will come. And I hope that I will be one of the first to congratulate you when that dream does come true. (((hugs)))

kari

Mapia

I am so sorry .......i never imagine i would have such feelings for people i ve never actually met. My heart goes out to you during this difficult moment. Hold on to DH ....its important that your relationship does not suffer but gets stronger.
Praying for you and DH.

(((hugs)))

AMy

mapia sorry it took so long to get on here and so so sorry it was BFN. I wished with all my heart for you and have to believe the day will come for all of us. I am thinking of you and send my love xxx

Oh I am so sorry Mapia. I was really hoping that this was it for you. Maybe IVF will do the trick. Its so hard to wait, I have thought about it too. I'll pray that you are sucesfull in the future, what ever you do!! Big Huggs!!

Mapia... I am so sorry to hear it. I know how it feels and it sucks!! I am praying for you.

Anna Leigh

Mapia - I am so sorry. My heart goes out to you and like you said this is a bump you just need to drive over. You have such a great outlook and iknow a BFP is in your future!! Take care.

hi mapia i havent been on much, but i just wanted to express how sorry i am. negative after negative really starts to put a toll on us. as always you are in my thoughts and prayers and i hope that this break does you and dh good and you get you LONG awaited BFP!!! i will be thinking about you and i hope you dont go to far away when on your break!! <3 aimee

Thank u girls for all ur kind words u truely are amazing all of u.Like Amy said I never thought I could care so much about people I never met before.I am taking care of DH he is wonderful and I will never let him feel otherwise.Poor guy got a migraine yesturday and left work today throwing up.Its been a long time since he got the combination of a migraine and throwing up.But he has a light stomach and all this stress got to him.Thank god he is feeling better and has eaten something as well.I hate to see him like this it breaks my heart.But now we will look forward to moving back to greece.:) Again I thank u guys from the bottom of my heart and I cant wait to see us all with BFP's.

Mapia

Mapia,
I dont blame you for wanting to take a break. That will give you time to move and get settled in to a new place. I was going to take one and then I ended up calling my doctor and getting in on the soonest cycle. I guess I am too impatient. It did help me feel better,and helped clear my mind of the heartache of miscarrying.

So you are going to move to Greece? How far is it from where you live now? How much is it for an IVF there? I am glad that you have planned on continuing to try to get preg. Well good luck in Greece and with your next cycle. I will definitely be watching for any news from you!!!


Best wishes!!! April

Hi April yeah I really need the break I can not do another 2ww.I am about to go insane.Greece is in Europe its about an 11 hr flight.The whole trip is about 13 hrs with a layover.IVF in greece is covered by most insurance.I will still do probably a few rounds of IUI before going to IVF.I still feel I will get a BFP through IUI.I havent lost hope after all these months.But I did have a chemical so I keep holding onto that.Plus meds are so much cheaper in Europe.We plan on leaving in Augs.

Good Luck to u.

Mapia

Hi Mapia,

Just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you. I totally understand why you need a break too. Month after month of BFN can be completely overwhelming. It will be good for you to concentrate on moving back to Greece where you will be happy. I'm glad to hear you haven't given up either. It's going to happen for you, it is. :)

Holly

Hi Mapia,
Sorry to hear it is a BFN again. I dunno wat to say. Am not good with words. I am trying to come to terms with my own BFN as well. But I wont give up.
I will keep u in my prayers and hope we all here will get their well deserved BFPs after years of trying.

Jody

((((HUGS)))) When you get home take a warm bath and let out some tears... try and keep your chin up girlie!

Mapia

Just wanted to let you know that i am thinking and praying for you.
Do whatever you think is best for you and DH.

(((hugs)))

AMy

Hi Mapia

I was so disappointed to log on and read about your BFN. Damn, I was really hoping this was it for you! Well sweetie, I will continue praying for you and can't wait to catch up with you soon!

Ruby

i am so sorry about your news, there is not much i can say except that i am thinking of you across the miles. Take care.

Hi Ruby sorry just saw ur post.Thanks for ur support I really took this last BFN real bad.Its been a week and I still think about it and get upset I cant help it.I am looking forward to leaving its what I want right now more then anything.Dh and I just really need to get our lives back.So moving back and being the 2 of us again will be good.Dont get me wrong I love my mom so much and it kills me to leave her behind.I just wish she would come with me.Oh well u cant have everything in life.Well I just have to look forward to getting my life back and hopefully with a baby.I know I will have a baby I just dont know when.I pray I get pregnant on my first shot in greece cause I dont know how much more I can take of this heartache.I guess this time off will do me some good physically and mentally.I already feel better that I wont have a 2ww this month.

Mariella thanks for ur kind thoughts.I wish that u get ur little miracle soon.

Mapia:)

Hi Mapia

I know you were upset about your BFN - it is only natural. You have had to endure a lot of heartbreak and here you still are with a positive attitude and so much support to offer evryone else, you truly are an amazing lady (I am not just saying that, I really mean it). I read you have decided to move back to Greece. It will be difficult saying goodbye to your mum but having the support of your bestfriend and the company of your little godson will be great for you. I know how much you love them and it is so important to surround yourself with loving, caring people while going through such hard times. So I think you have made a great decision - as long as you hook your computer up straight away once you get there, this place wouldn't be the same without you!
Having time off is great - I feel like a different person this month, almost normal again. It is the best thing you could do fo yourself and DH at this stage thus increasing your chances of a quick pregnancy upon your arrival in Greece.

Take care honey.

Ruby

Hi Rudy thanks so much for ur encouraging words u truely are a great women.I also want to thank u for being here for us and supporting us.It really will be hard saying bye to mom and I cant wait to get that part over with.Oh well I just have to stay focused on my future and my goal right now.When I get my miracle everything in my life will feel complete.It will fill my whole life.In the meanwhile I will have my godson to fill my life and my BF baby which is due end of Sept.Cant wait for that I will be there with her again just like I was when my godson was born.

Well sweetie I pray u will get that BFP soon as well.Good luck.

Mapia:)

Mapia,

Hows things with you?
Hope all is ok. Whens your next cycle then? everytime is more heartbreaking than the other you'd think you get used to the dissapointment eh?
Well the guys on the 2ww now thought it wouldnt happen to them and had the heartache too they will start a new flow of bfp's and send all their babydust to s for the next time.

chin up x