Amy I was thinking of you today and wondering about your newest beta results, looking forward to reading your post when I log on tommorrow. Best wishes!

Amy, I'm thinking of you too. Hope that second beta is sky high for you. :) Please let us know.

Holly

I'm praying so much for you Amy. Please let us know about your numbers, okay sweetie? Thinking of you!

Hi Amy! I saw on the other thread that your beta was great for 10 dpo!! I am very excited for you. Good luck with your second beta today!! Let us know what it is.

Anna Leigh

Amy sweetie I have been thinking about u constantly.I hope all went well with ur 2nd beta.Please let us know sweetie.

Mapia

Oh Mariella that was so sweet of you...ladies thanks for chiming in.

Well my b/w got LOSt GRRRRRRRRR. By the time they realised and called me back it was 2pm so had to draw blood again but they close at 4 so didn t get my results ready. Have to wait till tomorrow.
My thyroidtests and prog where also lost.........

Something that put my mind at rest was a darker HPT....but i am 12dpo today so its still not so dark.

Spoke to my heamo who posponed the heparin until tomorrow when my 2nd beta is out. He assured me that this does not cross the placenta as it is low molecular and a very expensive form. However my platelets are rather high so i might also need to take interferon......an injection to lower them down. This is the safest drug for pregnancy.
Contacted the best Gynea on the island really hope that he accepts me........waiting for his call.

Feel i m in a kind of dilemma.......one moment i think i should be happy . If sometyhing happens it won t make me feel any better just because i didn t celebrate. I feel i am missing out on happy moments just becuase i am so scared.

Thanks for letting me vent here.

Mariella really hope taht your IUI will result in your much awaited BFP. Glad that it all went smoothly.

ALM....hold on a few more days to go.

Mapia thanks for your constant support...looking forward to having you around in my hours.........you must be looking forward to youe next IUI .

Holly.......how are you? Did you have any news yet?

Thanks ...you ladies are amazing and i don t know how i d go through all this without you.

Amy

Hi Amy, good to hear from you...although I can't believe the labs lost your b/w. That is incredibly frustrating!! Hopefully they can speed up the new b/w and get some results to you shortly. Glad to hear your HPT is getting darker. That's definitely promising!!

Thanks for asking about me. No news from my dr yet, although I don't expect to hear from him for another week or so. I hate to say it, but I am down again today...Went to a cookout yesterday and was surrounded by everybody else's kids and the never ending questions of when we are planning to have our own as a constant reminder that our arms are still empty. Haven't felt like posting much today. Hopefully tomorrow will be better. I know celebrating your good beta #s will help to bring my spirits up. :angel:

Holly

Holly

I am sorry that you are feeling down........however i think it s completely understandable.
I know it is n ot pleasant being surrounded by everybody else s kids and that usual when are you going to get preggo question just sucks.
I arrived to a point that my relationship with my bro and sis really suffered coz of the kids. Their kids love me to pieces but that kind of used to hurt even more.Today whilst waiting for my dr a group of preggo women came out from another room......i literally stared with envy.

However i believe that if we don t give up we ll get there.
I know taht i have alot of things against me.....and even if it won t work out......i will be ever so upset but i will try again until i succeed.

You ve been through so much so it makes you think that you are less strong........but you are one of the strongest women around and i am sure that your arms will be full soon.
You are young....you have a supporting BF and a wonderful doctor.........hold on Holly.

Hugs

AMy

I can't believe thy lost your b/w!! I know it may be hard, but try not to worry too much.. it's not good for you or the baby. We'll be here for every step of the way, so let us know how it goes. We're praying for you!

Holly, I'm sorry you're feeling down. You'll be a mommy soon! You just have to hold on a little longer, ok? We're all here for you.

Luv you ladies!! ****BABY DUST****

OMG Amy I cant believe they lost ur B/W.Oh well I guess we will have to wait till tomorrow.Yes I soon will be in ur time zone cant wait.Although I am getting more and more depressed about leaving my mom as the time nears.I leave in exactly 7 weeks.Wow I cant believe how fast time is going. I am looking forward now to my next IUI since I have had this big break.Well sweetie enjoy ur night.

Mapia

i cant believe they lost your bloodwork, and didnt notice until that late!! ugh. id be so angry, but a darker hpt is a good sign. i guess you can only take it one day at a time!! feeling scared is natural i guess, the first time and only time i ever got a positive test, i thought a sense of relief and excitement would come over me, and instead i was a zombie scared to death. and i hope next time i get pregnant, i can out the happy, excited feelings first :blob_fire im sure each day something new and exciting happens it will sink in, and you will get more and more excited!!

p.s holly im sorry you are feeling down! i hate those questions. my family is always asking when me and dh are gonna have any, and hey are you pregnant yet, are you sure you should be having that drink, which only makes me want more! and then the friends who dont know, at any party "so when do you and dh want kids" then i love the "you should wait, kids are a pain in the butt, etc etc" im like ha! infertility is a pain in the butt, literally and figuratively. anyway, just wanted to chime in and tell you i hope you are feeling better soon!! :angel: Love aimee

Amy-
So sorry you have to wait yet another day. I'm sure these days have been dragging for you!! I hope to hear good news from you tomorrow.

Holly-
I'm sorry you are feeling down today! I went to a BBQ also yesterday and walked away feeling pretty terrible. I'm still a little down from it. All of my cousins were there with ALL of their kids. There were six babies total and I wanted to sneak away and leave but didn't. Nobody would have understood so I just smiled and chated but the whole time I was feeling so sad. I think about half of the time the conversation was focused on babies, pregnancy, stages, etc. It was pretty frustrating. I'm sure out turn will come, it's just so hard to be patient. :angel:

Carisa

Hi Amy and Holly

Can't believe that lost your paper work..good luck for today and yes, keep doing those HPTs, I'd be doing one every day and just sitting there watching the line wanting to open lots of bottles of wine to celebrate or at least buying something nice for the baby and me.

Holly,

You time will come as I have said before, remember that you have got pregnant. I had my egg retrival yesterday and there were three women in the operating waiting room, all prepared, the first lady when in and got 5 eggs, I got 11 and the next lady got 25. I felt lucky because the lady with 25 was told she couldn't do a fresh cycle and the lady with 5 looked really dissappointed. I have a few friends that are much older then me and who conceived by 'accident' and none of my friends understand what this is like. So I started to change my thinking about it all. I started to surround my myself with happy pregnany women or those that had just given birth, I try to hold their children and I am hoping that thier luck and content me will rub off on me. They probably think I am a little weired but I really enjoy holding babies and and imagaining myself with one. An older friend of my did 14 full cycles of IVF and didn't get pregnant, she was 44 when she stopped and they had invest over $100 000, she is an aunt to my DD. I know people (and probably many of you think...what does she know...she's got one) I get that a lot and find it frustrating and hurtful as I never wanted to just have one. I want to have three children. But I am lucky, it doesn't make it any easier. So when ever I am in situations where people are yabbing on about their pregnancies, I pick up their sleeping baby, walk to somewhere quite and just take some time out and pretend that for a moment...this will be me in 12 months. Don't know, I always walk away a little more motivated to give up the caffine, the alcohol, the cycling etc. etc.....

Try not to be too down, you have a lot going for you: you're young, producing good eggs and a DH that is keen...it will come.

Best wishes to you both

Pauline

Hey Amy... I was out and about all day today, but def thinking of you. I can't believe they lost the b/w!!! That is just nuts! Well I'm gonna be checking in tomorrow to see if the results are in... good luck sweetie!!!!

Holly hun, so sorry you are down today. It's a roller coaster ride of emotions and the low days really stink, don't they? :( Just remember we all have you in our thoughts and love you lots!!!!

OMG - thank you all for your encouragement and understanding. You ladies always know how to make me feel better. I felt like I was the only one stuck at cookouts w/ fertile mertles, and you all reminded me that I am not alone, not even close.

Amy, I'm sorry I hi-jacked your thread, but thank you for your sweet reply. ;) I am getting ready to read your update now. Really hope it is good news. :angel:

Thanks again ladies. I was still feeling a bit discouraged this morning until I read all your responses. Pauline, I really like your idea about just picking up a friend's baby and sitting in a quiet place to imagine myself in 12 months w/ my own little one. That really might help me to deal w/ all the upcoming occassions where it seems BF and I are the only nonparents.

Holly

Holly, hunny, I just want you know that I'm thinking about you and hope that you're doing well. It really does suck to be the only non-parents at "family" events, or having people who barely know you ask if there's a baby on the way...i could go on. But your time will come, and soon. You're in my prayers!
***BABY DUST***

Thanks Princess. Some days it is so hard to realize that IF is not going to consume my life forever. I really look forward to the day when each of us can look back at this time in our life w/ pride in how we gave it our all. I pray all our hard work will pay off. You are in my prayers as well.

Holly

Thanks, holly :) I'm sure someday, and someday SOON we'll look back at our IF days and be proud that we walked that hard road, and grateful that we did it together. **BABY DUST**