Recently, I have been thinking seriously about my diagnosis. More than two years ago, I was diagnosed with clinical depression (which was clearly the case). However, my symptoms started to change at the beginning of this year. I was soon diagnosed with Major Depression with Psychotic Features. I became uncomfortable with this diagnosis, because everything but the manic episodes were explained.
To clarify, I would have periods (usually at least 2 hours) where I felt euphoric and energized. I would often have racing thoughts and constant movement. I felt like I had uncontrollable energy that just encouraged me to be destructive or act foolishly. In all, I’ve had at least 6 of these episodes. Most of the time, I feel emotionally flat. When I heard my grandmother died, I really did not even react. I also have had several visual hallucinations, seeing the devil’s face and black images. I also feel firmly that demons implant thoughts in my head, and had multiple voices in my head. Additionally, I am paranoid and feel that my roommates are plotting against me. I honestly can’t tell if this is a delusion or if it is genuine. I just don’t know why they would hold such animosity against me.
I would not be that concerned with my diagnosis, but I don’t feel that the medication is doing anything to stop the delusions and hallucinations. I’ve had a series of ECTs, which made me feel better at first, but seem to have done nothing to help me in the long run. I currently take Risperdal, Trazodone, and Nortryptiline.
I’ve looked into schizo-affective disorder and feel maybe this is a more appropriate diagnosis. I want to bring up my concerns to my pdoc, but he is currently on leave. If anyone in the know could help me figure out what I may have I would greatly appreciate it.

I'm wondering if you are bi-polar
the energetic euphoric episodes would be the "manic" period

I thought about being bipolar, but I thought that the psychosis was not really an element of being bipolar.

I think in some cases it is

Yeah... I was diagnosed with schizoeffective, and generally, that is a combination of bipolar, and schizophrenia...I can relate, because, I"ve felt paranoid, beyond the point of questioning, but I still do not know...The insertion of thoughts, the subliminal messages that come from tv. specially directed towards you, etc...Typical symptoms of schizophrenia.. My guess is, schizoeffective.. Maybe.? Get a second opinion from a well trusted psych..HOnestly, I don't know enough about it to diagnose you.

I appreciate the replies. I'm getting so tired and frustrated w/ the numerous medications and treatments that show promise and then stop working altogether. I also apparently have to wait another week before I can meet with my pdoc, who is on vacation. That means having to deal with this virtual hell for at least that long.

Waffles ,

sorry you have to wait a week to see pdoc. Its rough around this time of year when they take breaks. Needed i know but hard on us lot with burning questions or just in need of their support. Mine's been away for three weeks and it has been a rocky road, with 3 days to go til i see him i feel like i've been dragging myself around by my tongue!

Hang in there and keep posting, its not your pdoc but we can listen and offer hugs of support

Ed