i have been going through this for 4 yrs now, it started witha missed period 3x a yr. then a period evry other month than a period 3x a year till now last period was april,dont no what to expect next,
i have hot flashes like labor pains, every 20 minutes . they have lessened now to every hr, but still restless and sleepless nights. you would think with all this sweating and restlessness that one would lose weight.
can anyone tell me why not , i think i get more exercize in bed during the night.

You'd think you'd lose weight ... sounds logical. Unfortunately, when you're trying to stay awake after getting up for the day, you're so sluggish that you need to consume things to keep you awake and that often means carbs and sugar. Since you're so tired though, your metabolism slows down too.

It's a miserable situation but eventually it does level out. Your body isn't the same as it was, but that does not equate to a bad thing. Afterall, when you entered puberty your body changed too and that wasn't necessarily a bad thing except that's when you started having periods and cramps (so maybe at times it did feel like a bad thing).

This time your body finally, after all the crap, does get to rest and do what it wants and NOT what hormones have always led it to do. Just give it time...it does get better!

thanks btoons,
for giving me some hope. this is such a distressing time.
i always waited for the time when my period would go away and i would be able to plan trips without worring about it coming unannounced.like it did on my honey moon and every special occasion i ever went to and had.
now a new set of problems arises. dont want to go anywhere because im tired and because i dont feel comfortable in my own skin anymore.
nothing fits,i feel old and sometimes i look old and i think old. and im getting depressed over just the general lack of interest in everything.
i try to have a positive attitude and to eat right and exercise, but lack of enthusiasium wins out.
how long before you started feeling like your oldself(back to normal)

Hi there!

Loved reading your note...because I am feeling the same way. I just thought this morning, "God, when will I start to feel like looking forward to something any more"? I hurt in every bone/muscle in my body, have acid reflux, nausea and just plain yuck! Skipped monthly for 6 months, then started again...went for 4 months and now skipped 2 again. Feel bloated, old, my skin from what everyone says, looks great, but I feel so old. ONly wonderful thing that has happened to me in the past is my beautiful grand daughter was born in Feb. She gives me the strength I need to keep going. I am at work today with no motivation to do ANYTHING!!! I feel so sorry for my poor husband, I try not to complain, but he can tell that I am so unmotivated. There are days that I just hate everything and everybody although I try not to show it, I feel it. How long before I can start to feel good again. Used to be that once a week I would feel like this, now every day I feel like this and the doc. just keeps saying that I am not there yet! Every night at 2:30 am I am up and just roll and toss....started to sleep half the night in the other room so I don't wake my other half...can keep cool enough. Acid Reflux is so bad, had a scope done just to be sure nothing was wrong...
So, you are not alone. Having this site helps me a lot...nice to know that we are not alone, but does not help in making us feel better. What did our poor mothers do before computers? They had to suffer alone! Lets be happy that we don't have to do that.....!! Try to have a good day.

i just wish there was a magic pill for all these symtoms. especially the weight gain hot flashes and the giant breasts.
i was always the sexy one, now im the schlep. it bothers me to look at myself. i dont like what i see. im becoming one ofthose woman who where strecth pants all the time and thats not me.
reallybad time for me.

a spot of retail therapy might just make you feel a little better about the weight gain.
i've put 2 stone (28 pounds) on over the last few years, got very unhappy with myself and decided i wasn't going to buy any bigger clothes but was really going to knuckle down and lose the weight. well, i never did, and just kept putting the pounds on and my clothes just kept getting tighter and more unconfortable.
finally, last autumn/winter i had a good talk to myself, decided that in truth there was very little chance of me dieting along with all the other stuff going on, and went out and bought the next size up (and in some cases the NEXT size too) in a couple of pairs of trousers and a few tops, and a couple of pretty necklaces too. over this summer i've added a few summer bits in a size bigger too. and i feel a whole heck of a lot happier. i actually think i look a little slimmer to, as the clothes FIT me rather than making me look squeezed in to a size too small.
i decided if i ever to manage to lose any weight, then i'm going to treat myself to some new clothes in that slimmer size too, as a reward for losing the weight.
i'm not grossly overweight but could do with losing the weight i've put on, but it doesn't worry me anymore, i'm happy in my skin, and i know it's down to accepting it and buying the bigger size.

sue

We couldn't wait until we reached our teens either. Remember that? When we'd be old enough to go on a REAL date...or old enough to vote, or old enough to be on our own..........

During those times my mother used to say 'don't rush childhood. It doesn't last as long as you think'

The same thing applies today, well the part that says '...it doesn't last as long as you think'

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liverpoolsue, i didnt gain alot of weight,about 20lbs, it just looks like it because my breasts have gotten so big they arrive before i do.my clothes still fit, just a little tight,and i refuse to go up a size. wear alot a stretch pants for now pride gets in the way.
i do exercise 30min.a day and eat right.stilltired
its just this passage of life that keeps bringing me down. thank goodness my husbandl oves me,icouldnt do this on my own.

I feel the same way. Everyone says I don't look old. But I FEEL old right now. My body hurts. It feels like I'm losing control. I rarely eat but I'm gaining weight. I have no energy. My libdo is gone because I just feel terrible all the time. Men are the last thing on my mind right now. I just want to FEEL better!!!

I still get my period every month (am 47 yrs) but have peri symptoms, one of which is hot flashes.
What really helps is taking Black Cohosh and Evening Primrose Oil.

Terri