Melvin4
08-18-2007, 08:32 AM
I just finished reading Jeffrey Schwartz's book Brain Lock recently and I have been trying to apply to the four steps here and there, but it's very difficult to apply the Refocus step for some of my obcessions. For instance I take a 20 minute showers which I use to be able to take shorter but it was due to the fact that the shower head could come off the wall. Now my shower head is stationary where I have moved to and I find it harder to feel I'm clean.
The big issue though is at the end of my shower I will wash my hands for quite a while like 20-30 seconds because I'm always worried about feces being on my hands or just the idea that an odor could be on my hands from cleaning myself in that region. I have to know my hands are clean enough so that I can grab the towel and get dressed. Until recently I would wash my hands after getting dressed because I was always afraid my hands would come in contact with an area of the towel that touched the rectal area.
Basically what I'm getting at is there is all this talk about refocusing and doing another behavior, but I can't just always go and grab a book very easily if I can't touch it with my hands.
To me this is why fear of germs is the hardest of the OCD's to overcome.
The big issue though is at the end of my shower I will wash my hands for quite a while like 20-30 seconds because I'm always worried about feces being on my hands or just the idea that an odor could be on my hands from cleaning myself in that region. I have to know my hands are clean enough so that I can grab the towel and get dressed. Until recently I would wash my hands after getting dressed because I was always afraid my hands would come in contact with an area of the towel that touched the rectal area.
Basically what I'm getting at is there is all this talk about refocusing and doing another behavior, but I can't just always go and grab a book very easily if I can't touch it with my hands.
To me this is why fear of germs is the hardest of the OCD's to overcome.
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Mark5000
08-18-2007, 12:54 PM
I have tried this method in this book and found it counter productive. My OCD accually got worse. This method is based on giving yourself constant reassurances which in turn feeds the OCD. Unfortunatly there is no easy road to recovery but at least there is a road if a sufferer is willing to take it.CBT if done properly and long enough is the only therapy proven to get over this crap.
purplegirl1
08-19-2007, 04:13 AM
CBT is the best to help. Although, I used to have a huge and I mean about 1 hour if not longer shower ritual...which did include getting dressed...over time, with meds and CBT it is pretty much gone. Except sometimes i do feel that I have to rewash my hands, etc.. so once in a blue moon if I have to rewhash my hands, so be it, better than all the time rituals. I used to have to check the tags on my clothes to see the size and instructions on how to wash the material, befoer I could put it on. I would check, go to put it on an dhave to recheck.. over and over before I knew it - it would be 10 minutes and still no dressed or half dressed.....
lbreeze
08-19-2007, 04:25 AM
First, let me say that I'm new to this board and it feels so good to be able to talk about this stuff without fear of ridicule. I listened to Brain Lock on tape and it really helped me differentiate between normal thoughts and ocd thoughts. In doing so, I had more will power to resist performing certain compulsions. I used to wash my hands and then minutes later, question whether or not they were clean. To avoid the hassle of worrying and trying to convince myself otherwise, I'd inevitably go wash them again, and sometimes again and again.
Now, although I obsess still, I hardly ever go back to wash my hands once I'm done. I know that the obsessions aren't rational, so I've learned to trust myself and the obsessions have dissapated greatly.
I can relate though. I used to find myself trying to change my behavior and do something constructive but couldn't touch anything (the phone, computer keyboard, remote, ect.). This thought process would lead me to give in sooner. But if I'm conciously aware of what I'm doing when I'm washing (I envy people who can be so carefree as to actually sing in the shower:) ), I know for certain that I'm clean and simply will not listen to anything that suggests otherwise. And now the obsessions aren't as overwhelming.
Now, although I obsess still, I hardly ever go back to wash my hands once I'm done. I know that the obsessions aren't rational, so I've learned to trust myself and the obsessions have dissapated greatly.
I can relate though. I used to find myself trying to change my behavior and do something constructive but couldn't touch anything (the phone, computer keyboard, remote, ect.). This thought process would lead me to give in sooner. But if I'm conciously aware of what I'm doing when I'm washing (I envy people who can be so carefree as to actually sing in the shower:) ), I know for certain that I'm clean and simply will not listen to anything that suggests otherwise. And now the obsessions aren't as overwhelming.
Melvin4
08-22-2007, 02:50 AM
Thanks for the helps everyone. I question whether my hands are clean quite a bit. But another thing that I do that is even worse is I'll wash until I feel my hands are clean. It is too long many of times and I'm always having cracked hands. The worst is in the shower or after I've gone to the restroom.