I am wondering if any of you went through a "hermit" phase? I was just diagnosed on Monday, to have FMS, CFS, CTS, IBS, and a few other things like insomnia. Lately I don't care if I leave the house, and I rarely get dressed. I feel really blah most of the time since I feel like every bone in my body is broken, and I have been ran over by a bus or something.

I am tired almost all of the time, and going somewhere would require effort. So I guess mainly my question is do you just become a "hermit" when you are feeling your worst? And, does it get better?

I totally relate. In fact, for the past 7 months especially, I have hardly done anything except go to work and come home and sit around. It's not because I don't want to do anything but I simply feel like garbage. I know a lot of people don't understand this so I choose to stay away from people and doing anything social. Luckily, people at my work are very understanding and I have a great social outlet there. Also, because of this I do not keep myself up as well as I used to. I don't ever go shopping any more which is a huge change for me! I keep hoping things are going to get better or I am going to get some relief but I NEVER feel good. I have been through about every test known to man even for some rare diseases and nothing ever shows up. I think I'd rather have an acute problem than this horrible chronic invisible disease. If I sound bitter, it's because I am. I try to be positive most of the time but seriously this wears me down and sometimes the negativity and frustration comes out. It's like I am mourning the death of my old life. It also doesn't help that these should be the best years of my life...I'm 34.

I can totally relate. I have to FORCE myself out the door just to go buy pet food sometimes. I refuse to let my babies get hungry... lol. But anyway, being a hermit is just part of FM when you are in a flare, and sometimes just because it feels good just to get a little peace and quiet even when you do feel okay. Enjoy your "hermit" time, but try to figure out something you like to do outside if nothing but to get some sun. It helps. Take care. ;)

Yes i can relate and yes it has gotten better. I actually made a list of positive affirmations that I read each day to help motivate me. I always feel better if i get up and take a shower and put on a little make up. It also lifts my spirits to get outside even if it's just for 15 minutes. And making some kind of outside contact with a family member or friend even if i just listen.

But I am also gentle with myself and will allow myself to rest. I went through a terrible bout of acute pain, depression, isolation for about 6 months or so at onset of fibro. For 3 months or so I stayed in bed, I hurt so badly and was so tired. But it did get better. At first I only ventured out to the doctor's offices. And it took everything out of me. I started walking, but sometimes, I would just lay down in the grass. I just couldn't do it. There is this certain fatigue/pain feeling that I just can't push myself through. I don't have it very much anymore. Like i said it has gotten better.

Yes, the worst of the symptoms of FMS and IBS is you just simply can't plan on anything. You have to psyche yourself up at times just to make it to the doctor's appointments. I know I go for weeks that I do not leave my home. I do have a nice country atmosphere so I do try to at least sit outside on my good days and watch the birds or enjoy the flowers.

I would like to be able to work and socialize but I am in so much pain most days, I prefer to stay in with my heating pad and my pj's. FM is a mystery as it has it's ups and downs. I know how you all feel. I try to read the news, watch a little TV and I do have a dog that occupies a little of my time, and that keeps me content on most days but sometimes I feel if I could just get out and go spend a day out in the world, it would do me a world of good, but I would pay dearly for that privilege.

ahhhhhh a new word to call it..but is it a just a phase? mine has gotten much worse instead of better for the last 2 years now. if one thing stops theres another to take its place.

I am not only a hermit..I get in these dratted fogs that kick my @#@#.
when it lets up a bit..the fog is a hit and run game..I put on a cake yesterday which was around 3:oopm..it takes me all day now to just get around.. I have to do pick up around the house at night or I would be living in a pig sty. anyway the cake before I foget..lol I forgot all about it.. sometime much later...when the fog lifted a bit and all I "remembered" is CAKE!

I was in a panic! GREAT now I am haveing a panic attack too!
I always clean up as I work so no help there.


the oven is the last place I look but when I found it, it was in the oven..burnt almost to a crisp. :( (I always check the fridge first and the trash can when this kind of stuff happens)

I have learned the hard way that this evil diease is all consuming with no instruction page.

I truly pray it is a phase and I will get threw it without burning my house down around my ears.:D

Boy can I relate. I get panic attacks when I know I have to go somewhere. My husband tries to understand but my daughter doesnt I feel bad because I used to love to go shopping with her but just cant

I also have multiple sclerosis but I have to say I think the FM is worse. I am totally anti-social. I will do anything so I dont have to go out i do alot of shopping online

Thanks for listening
Sue

:wave: Hiya Sue, like the others that have posted you, I, too can relate to the hermit phase, but as with other fibro problems we are all different as to how it affects us and for how long. Whenever possible, I take my dog with me and he seems to help me calm myself, must admit though on really bad days I don't go out, I try to have a walk about in the garden. Hope it passes soon take care Snoozyowl ;)

I am glad to hear that I am not the only one with the "hermit syndrome". After 1 1/2 years of problems, my problems have been given a name - fibromyalgia. I was just diagnosed today. Now I have a name for the pain and I don't feel quite as down. I have become a hermit for the last 3 months (off and on). I hate shopping and I find my grandkids are more "work" than they used to be. My doctor is still having me do a spinal tap to rule out MS. I think the thing that bothers me most is being tired and still not sleeping. I can go 2 days with no sleep and not feel sleepy just exhausted. When my doctor gets my meds straight, I am hoping that this will pass.

Thank you, everybody, for posting. I find all of you very interesting and informative.

God bless you all, may you have many GOOD days.

I Guess i'm not the only one who is a Hermit. I have absolutely no desire to leave my home. Anyone who wants to visit me, they come to me. My family has finally adjusted to my ways of life i have to live. My pain that lives with me keeps me home bound. Doc says stay totally away from any stress. Ha! My hubby has always been a hard worker, injured at work .At this time we have NO income. I'm at home and surrounded with stress. My Fibro just loves it! Sorry starting to vent here but as we all know stress will bring out Fibro much stronger. I can't do as i once did, i don't like being seen with a cane, I'm still young and wish i knew how to fight back with this Fibro. So for me , I'm comfortable being a hermit could care less to socialize. I'm sure many of you can relate to this, go to store, doctor appointments and get back home.I believe Fibro has made us become Hermitts.
and as always try and
BeHappy2

I Guess i'm not the only one who is a Hermit. I have absolutely no desire to leave my home. Anyone who wants to visit me, they come to me. My family has finally adjusted to my ways of life i have to live. My pain that lives with me keeps me home bound. Doc says stay totally away from any stress. Ha! My hubby has always been a hard worker, injured at work .At this time we have NO income. I'm at home and surrounded with stress. My Fibro just loves it! Sorry starting to vent here but as we all know stress will bring out Fibro much stronger. I can't do as i once did, i don't like being seen with a cane, I'm still young and wish i knew how to fight back with this Fibro. So for me , I'm comfortable being a hermit could care less to socialize. I'm sure many of you can relate to this, go to store, doctor appointments and get back home.I believe Fibro has made us become Hermitts.
and as always try and
BeHappy2

:wave: Hiya Behappy2, until we are able to come to terms with fibro, yeh being a hermit is safe and there ain't no shame in that. I use a cane, a very funky looking one, I am very consious of the looks I get, but then I find people will talk to me more often, not asking why I have a cane, but everyday conversation, I also get offered help with shopping and opening of doors etc. At first I was taken back and resented this kindness, now I smile and thank those considerate people. Can't help, but feel that it is sad that it takes a cane for people to help one another though. I'm so sorry about your financial worries, that sort of stress really is bad for us as you are aware. Venting is helping you get the stress out so vent away all you like, we understand, we all do it at one time or another. As for fighting fibro, you don't, you accept it as part of you, its HARD I know, only last week I was rebelling and fighting back, but it hurts too much to carry on like that for too long. Fibro is only part of you, not all of you. Take one day at a time, do what you can, when you can, how you can. You are still a warm, vibrant, loving woman doing the best she can in very difficult circumstances. In the UK, its different with benefits etc, but I'm sure the other ladies will be able to advise you, there are other sites on here where there is that kind of info, I'm sure. I really do wish you luck, keep posting, take care, try to keep well Behappy2, warm thoughts to you and your hubby, hugs Snoozyowl;)

Don't worry about becoming a hermit...this too will pass. Then again it may not. You must do what is comfortable for you. When I was first DX with it seven years ago after a botched hsyterectomy/bladder tuck I thought I was dying. I went through denial, depression, had to quit working, seclusion, anger, bitterness, too much meds prescribed, total of 6 surgeries since Fibro DX!!! and finally... I am at a point in my life that I feel that it is up to me to take charge of my healthcare. I found doctors that didn't believe in FIbro...or medicated you to death....or were insolent...or were uncaring...or didn't know what the heck they were doing or had their own theory on what Fibro is!!! I have seen, felt, been through a lot in seven years and I cannot tell you a cure, what to use, what works best...all I can say is hang in there!!! You will survive this although at times it seems hopeless. At this stage I am waiting to find out if I have hypothyroidism after a left lobe thyroidectomy I had on Aug 22 to remove a calcified nodule. I also suffer terribly from severe insomnia often going 2 yo 4 days without sleeping. I hate meds and only take med for sleeping when I get to the end of my rope...otherwise I feel like a zombie. Being a hermit is sometimes a way of coping with this horrible disease (often with many secondary illnesses to go along with it). Don't be so hard on yourself and for heavens sake don't listen to the ignorant people who will say "Geez...you don't look sick" a well known phrase you will hear often from uninformed people. Try Positive meditation and for goodness sake...keep moving...I know it hurts but to not move means to be bedridden. Hang in there!!!!!!

I am so glad I found this thread this morning. While I truly hate to see that y'all are suffering so, these posts brought some comfort in knowing that there are others like me on this Board, thank you. I have been in the hermit category now for going on 3 years. I am not well enough to go anywhere but to doctor appts, and even on some days have to cancel and reschedule those.....no one outside of this Board can really understand how one can actually be too sick to the doctor, but I know that y'all understand that all too well. I am so tired of hearing from others, well I have FM, but I just don't let it hold me back, I just get on with it. I thought that once too....in early stages. As the years go on and you experience FM robbing you of your health and quality of life, only then does one truly realize how very disabling FM actually is. Doctors only think they know. They don't. So those in the early stages of this need to be cautious about totally embracing what general doctors, and even some specialists, say. Do your homework on FM. There is much available online. There are many different theories and just as many different treatment approaches. And, it may ultimately be determined that several causes can lead to the same condition, so you just have to not give up.....keep trying and find something that helps for you. And, this Board is a wonderful place to learn from others about their own experiences!

Hi, my ex-boyfriend was recently diagnosed with Fibro and CFS.....I say ex because after his diagnosis his condition deteriorated to a point where he felt he simply could not cope with a relationship......he is suffering all the same things that you have all described here.....I am devastated. I hate that he is in so much pain and only just has enough energy to go to work and virtually nothing more than that, but I am feeling grief and loss too. I love him so much and although he says I am still his "best friend" he is pushing me away so much....I barely even get a txt a week at the moment. It really, really hurts. I just wish there was something I could do for him.....How can I help him?? And how have those of you suffering this awful disease dealt with the obvious relationship issues it brings???

Any shared experiences/advice would be greatly appreciated

I found my cure, maybe it can help you to? I hope so..To make a long story shorter, I will explain my list of symptoms over the years that just got worse, and what I have done after trying many different diets, pills, doctors, naturopaths etc etc.
My symptoms started in my early twenties, I am now 38, and only in the last year has my life turned around dramatically. These were my symptoms:
Headaches/migraines, extreme fatigue & tiredness, irritable, extreme hunger pains, bloated, allergies, sinus, hayfever, itchy spots on back, anxiety, body flu like aches, hot sweats in the night, always catching colds/flus very easy which took a longer to recover and hit me harder than most people, blurred vision at times, dizzyness, numb/tingling face lips, numb/timgling hangs in the night, cramps, no energypoor memory, no confidence, depressed low blah feeling about life, shortness of breath, pulpitations...The list goes on. There have been simply too many to list here. One day I walked into a health shop I'm sure looking like death warmed up trying to make a sentence form so that I was making sense when the health care professional approached me. I thought she was just 'another one' of those people who thought she knew what I had, so her voice was just another one in the sea of many. There was something about her genuinely passionate nature that made her stand out from anyone else I had met, so I listened. I told her how I felt, that I had suffered from this for too long, and it was getting worse, and that I couldn't even work because of my terrible health. She said I sounded like I was suffering from a chronic case of Candida. She said that she believed that fibro, CFS and all the other fancy names stemmed from Candida. I had never heard of this, but this is what happens if you have have Candida...
"Candidiasis itself is a symptom, signally a weak immune system, and an upset balance in the digestive and hormonal systems, especially the adrenal and thyroid glands. The symptoms we then experience stem from three effects of the Candida in its invasive form: the fungus itself; the toxins it produces and the leaky gut caused by its hyphae or microscopic fingers growing through the gut wall. Once your gut wall is damaged like this, partially digested partilces of food can escape into the blood stream. At first, these are all filtered out by the liver, but once it gets overloaed (remember it is having to cope with all the toxins the candida is producing as well), all sorts of inappropriate material will get into the main bloodstream, triggering immune reactions. By then, complicated feedback loops and some of the many vicious cycles set it causing many dehibilitating symptoms over a long period of time. It is being called the silent epidemic."

My story is in August last year I did the Candida diet. It is a complete sugar free, yeast free diet. No bread, white sugar, vinegar, low carb ( as carbs turn into sugar in the body )any food that rots too fast like bananas. No mushrooms it is a fungus. I also stopped eating wheat/gluten. You can search on line for a full list of foods you can't eat. It is hard, but the reward for myself was a chance at a new life. I did the diet for three months, supported with a strong high potency pro-biotic, and anti-fungus pills. After three months I neglected my diet, and started feeling the pains and sluggishness creep back into my body I went back on the diet. A year later and more relaxed with my diet, but still consciously making a good effort, and still taking my pills, I am now happy to say I work fulltime and have all the energy in the world. My spirit has lifted emmensly, and I feel like a normal human being that is not missing out on life any more. I suggest you give it a go. I really believe we are what we eat after my own personal experience. I have no body aches, no headaches, none of the above that I mentioned. My confidence is back, my head is clear, life is great!
Remember if you do this, to look under 'ingredients' on any food item, if it has 'sugar' on there, don't buy it. Only after you start to feel well that you can reintroduce it slowly and moderately into your diet. All the best if you decide to give it a go! I really hope I have helped someone from my own experience. Goodluck!!

I have suffered from Fibro for over 3 years. I have tried supplement after supplement. Can you give me more information on this candida cleanse? Is there a book I can buy or web site to learn more infor or how to do this cleanse?

Thanks for all your help

I am so glad I found this thread this morning. While I truly hate to see that y'all are suffering so, these posts brought some comfort in knowing that there are others like me on this Board, thank you. I have been in the hermit category now for going on 3 years. I am not well enough to go anywhere but to doctor appts, and even on some days have to cancel and reschedule those.....no one outside of this Board can really understand how one can actually be too sick to the doctor, but I know that y'all understand that all too well. I am so tired of hearing from others, well I have FM, but I just don't let it hold me back, I just get on with it. I thought that once too....in early stages. As the years go on and you experience FM robbing you of your health and quality of life, only then does one truly realize how very disabling FM actually is. Doctors only think they know. They don't. So those in the early stages of this need to be cautious about totally embracing what general doctors, and even some specialists, say. Do your homework on FM. There is much available online. There are many different theories and just as many different treatment approaches. And, it may ultimately be determined that several causes can lead to the same condition, so you just have to not give up.....keep trying and find something that helps for you. And, this Board is a wonderful place to learn from others about their own experiences!

I cannot believe I stumbled upon this thread. What a relief. I get so tired of hearing it doesn't look like there is anything wrong with you. I guess maybe that is where the hermit phase of life comes into play. If I do try and go out with someone, I can't keep up with them and they look at you like your acting like there is something is wrong with you. I worked up until June of 06 when I suffered multiple TIA strokes and had was being treated for generalized anxiety disorder and severe depression for over 25 years. After the TIA stokes, my doc would not let me go to work as my moods were going way off base, hence, the real diagnoses became BP1. With the BP diagnoses the fibro became much worse. My sleep patterns are horrible as I can go for up to 100 hours (not kidding) with no sleep, this is not by choice. I have told my docs and they give me sleep meds and have tried up to 8 and none have worked. I tried to keep a positive attitude about both the fibro and bp but I am fighting SSD and am getting no where, I am waiting for a hearing with the judge, finanacial burden of having the disease, and trying to see what it is that I have to offer to the household.

Even if you have insurance the cost of the co-pays still makes the meds and office visits expensive. I take 12 different meds for a total of 26 pills per pay and must see my shrink, therapist and pain management doc every month. My therapist told me that I had an old life that I have to let go of and that I now have to understand and accept my new life. I am not even in a depressed mood right now I am just hurting so bad physically. The only person I really tell is my husband but not all the time. He is asleep now. He just tells me to go to bed. Which is what my pain doc tells me. I get so sick and tired of hearing go to bed.

I don't know what to do about the fibro anymore. I take 7.5mg of mobic, 2 pills 3x per day of norco 10/325, muscle relaxer 1 pill 4 x per day and anywhere from 4-9 trigger point injections per month. I started keeping a mood chart for my BP but added a column for my pain level and I never get below a 6 but normally stay at about an 8 or 9. Can somebody please tell me how this can be?

The most I get out is to pick my son up from school occasionally as he decided to move in with his dad (another story) so I probably haven't picked him up except 8 times since school started. I go to my doctor appts. (Three per month) I go to my Mom and Dads. They live on the lake. Very Peaceful. I go in the back yard with my dogs. That is it. I live in a rented house so I can't do anything to the house even if I felt like it. Such as planting flowers. Well I could but why would I want to put money into it, I don't have it.

Does anyone really get a lot of relief from their treatment plan for fibro? I know I just got 9 trigger point injections 12 days ago and everywhere I got them I still hurt like hell.

I do not wish to bring anyone but I really needed to talk (vent) tonight. I guess it is a little bit of the fibro and a little bit BP.

God Bless to all of you who listened and God Bless all of you that are here with me as I know how you feel.

Hi, my ex-boyfriend was recently diagnosed with Fibro and CFS.....I say ex because after his diagnosis his condition deteriorated to a point where he felt he simply could not cope with a relationship......he is suffering all the same things that you have all described here.....I am devastated. I hate that he is in so much pain and only just has enough energy to go to work and virtually nothing more than that, but I am feeling grief and loss too. I love him so much and although he says I am still his "best friend" he is pushing me away so much....I barely even get a txt a week at the moment. It really, really hurts. I just wish there was something I could do for him.....How can I help him?? And how have those of you suffering this awful disease dealt with the obvious relationship issues it brings???

Any shared experiences/advice would be greatly appreciated

First of all, he may not remain an ex, he may just need time to cope with the hand he has just been dealt. He probably doesn't have the energy to do anything other than work as that is how I was before I had to stop working. You have to understand that this is something that is chronic and he has to accept and maybe he is having a problem with that.

He also may have so much love for you that he does not want you to have to go through all of this. If you still love him, let him know that and let him know you will be there for him when he is ready.

I am on my second marriage and have always worked and had to stop working a little over a year ago. I have only been married a little less than two years. My husband is so caring and understanding. I still worry that he didn't sign up for this however, my husband wants me to take care of myself and not worry about anything else.

Learn what you can about the diseases. Then talk to your ex about it and the things you have learned. That way he will know you truly care and are not afraid of them.

God Bless you for caring so much. :angel:

I have suffered from Fibro for over 3 years. I have tried supplement after supplement. Can you give me more information on this candida cleanse? Is there a book I can buy or web site to learn more infor or how to do this cleanse?

Thanks for all your help

Hi there

I'm not really an expert on Candida, I can only go from my own personal experience, and what information I have been given from my own health care professional. I would suggest to try the diet along with a very good high potency pro-biotic (you keep them stored in the fridge) along with an anti-fungal supplement from a good health shop. If you enter 'Candida Diet' into a web search it will give you a lot of choices. There isn't a book on the Candida diet that I am aware of. Just basically get back to the basics for two to three months and see if you feel better. No dressings, sauces, vinegers, food that goes off too fast, and especially no sugar or anything with yeast. I also went off wheat and gluten, as I also have an allergy to wheat but thought I would stop eating both for better health. I was so lethargic, it was very hard to me to get off the couch and do anything! Just achy, tired, with muscle stiffness, backaches, neckaches etc etc. Within four weeks of this specific diet I was racing around everywhere! It was quite an amazing transformation.
Candida sufferers can also develop from people who have taken long term medications or especially antibiotics, they are very harmful to our body. It is important to restore the healthy bacteria in our gut for good health. Do some searches or just follow what I have suggested to see if there is any improvement in your health and energy levels. You just have to be very organised when it comes to meals/snacks etc. I have rice bread that I toast that has no sugar or yeast in it. You just have to search for different food in the supermarket and check labels. It is well worth it though. Sometimes it might take up to a couple of months before you feel better, but be patient and hopefully this will be your cure too!

First of all, he may not remain an ex, he may just need time to cope with the hand he has just been dealt. He probably doesn't have the energy to do anything other than work as that is how I was before I had to stop working. You have to understand that this is something that is chronic and he has to accept and maybe he is having a problem with that.

He also may have so much love for you that he does not want you to have to go through all of this. If you still love him, let him know that and let him know you will be there for him when he is ready.

I am on my second marriage and have always worked and had to stop working a little over a year ago. I have only been married a little less than two years. My husband is so caring and understanding. I still worry that he didn't sign up for this however, my husband wants me to take care of myself and not worry about anything else.

Learn what you can about the diseases. Then talk to your ex about it and the things you have learned. That way he will know you truly care and are not afraid of them.

God Bless you for caring so much. :angel:

Thank you so much for your reply! :) It really helps to hear from someone who is going through the same thing that my ex is....I can't imagine what he's going through, but I totally understand how real and how debilitating it can be.....I have told him that I love him and want to be there for him but he insists that he feels he needs to deal with this on his own and that he just can't give me a relationship. I have to accept this for now I feel, because to push for anything else would be selfish on my part...I know he doesn't need the pressure....I just want to be able to spend time with him and have more communication as a supportive friend.....this isn't really happening at the moment. But, I did really, really want to thank you. Your email was a huge help. I think that what I will do now is do some research as you suggest, share with him what I learn and also all the helpful tips people have posted on this board.

Thank you again!! :)

;) Oh the word 'hermit' I can relate to...on several levels....

One I hurt so bad that I stayed in nightgrowns all winter...took hot showers, tylenols and another clean nightgown, the less near/around/or on me the better. I was sitting in the recliner while watching tv with my grandson and he was hitting the chair with his foot, I thought I would die...couldn't believe the pain could be so great.

Never went out or wanted to go anywhere so I wouldn't have to even put the clothes on...just the drs which was a challenge.

Then my mother actually said to me...'oh you're becoming a hermit'...we laughed but it was a little hurtful...she lives downstairs and knows I'm in pain although I'm not a complainer, but inspite of her knowing about fibro, don't really think she understood it completely....except to see I can no longer walk up the stairs...I am getting a stair lift.

That's what's wonderful about coming to the boards, people relate, we can vent etc.

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)) ))))))))))))))))) gentle of course to everyone today for getting through another day trying to smile. :)

You are correct.... Gentle hugs at that. I am so particular that I cannot even have wrinkles in the sheets during the night as it will start hurting my skin and muscles. How do you make people understand that with them thinking you aren't completely out of your mind. It is raining here today and I hurt sooooooooooo bad, (no pity party please) I just want to crawl in bed and cry but have decided to make dinner tonight and do laundry. I have decided that I am going to my parents after my two doc appts on Friday and am staying until a week from Sunday. I don't feel needed here and it is more depressing here so I want to stay there. So Megan I hope you see from how little it takes to bring pain from wrinkles in sheets, to what CGBuzz said about kicking the chair and not wearing clothes at all. I either wear a very soft pair of thin sweat pants, sleeveless tee shirt and jacket which comes off and on all throughout the day at home. The other big pet peeve, is hair stubs from shaving. I shave almost everyday. If I don't have the energy, I sometimes have to get up in the middle of the night just to shave my legs as the stubs bother me so much.

I know this sounds ridiculous to you however, all of these small things can cause so much pain to us. The other things that bother me are to much noise (sensory overload, lights and noise together), and just a soft touch or hug from a family member, which I wouldn't tell them for the world. I know there are many more but I am in some what of a fibro fog today so I will have to wait when I am thinking more clearly.

Megan - You hang in there and keep asking questions, posting, venting or whatever else you need to do.

For my fellow fibromites - (((((((BIG GENTLE HUGS))))))))))) To You All, Megan, you are included in the Big Gentle Hugs also because you care for one.

God Bless and I am sending you all lots of Sunshine :cool: