I've decided to cut myself off of norcos and percocets this week! There have been a couple of things that have led up to this decision... first off, I've been dealing with a serious problem with a kidney stone. As you know, stones are extremely painful and I've had to have both IV pain meds and oral narcotics. The IV pain meds were less effective because I've been taking so many norcos and other pills and I had to take more oral meds to get pain relief, and believe me, I needed it!

The second thing that brought me to this decision was that I have received SO many rx's for pain meds over the past 3 weeks or so... I have my normal rx for 240 norcos to last 30 days, then I've had a couple of rx's from the ER for 20-30 percocets at a time and then an rx for 30 norcos from my urologist. And the thing is - I've gone through so many already that I'll still be short at the end of the month with my normal rx for norco. Finding that out was a huge wake up call as to just how many pills I go through. Also, they haven't been giving me the best high lately... I'll have a high for a couple of hours and then I'll end up sleeping for like 3 hours during the day and I don' like that.

They had to do surgery to remove the kidney stone and put in a stent so I've got the week off. Well I actually have the week off because I was supposed to go on an 8-day cruise to the Caribbean but I had to cancel due to surgery. So I figured that since I've got the week off this is the perfect time to stop taking the pills. I'm going to basically go c/t, with a very quick taper. I go back to work on Sunday so hopefully I'll be feeling better by then. I just can't live my life like this anymore - counting pills to see if I'll run out by the end of the month, being in pain and not getting relief like normal people would, etc.

I bought some detox tea from GNC so hopefully that will help a little. I'm going to read the "sample detox" thread for some more tips. I'm just curious though - how long does it usually take people to start feeling better? I've been taking at least 8 pills a day, but usually around 12 a day (10/325 norcos). Thanks for any help and support :)

Izzy76, Thats Gonna Be A Tough Ride. You Were Doin So Much And Now You Think You Can Just Stop In 7 Days? Why Don`t You Go On Sub Or Something To Ease That Ride? A Little Tea Is Not The Thing! I Don`t Know What Else To Say But Good Luck And Please Write Me Back On Wednesday And Let Me Know How You Feel I Can Suggest Some Natural Things For You That Will Help With The Wds.peace. Fitz.

Hi Lizzy. You sound like a very strong person and I want to offer you my support and encouragement on your detox plan. For me I can't do it cold turkey (which I would love to do to get off these hateful pills) because they are benzos that I am addicted to and going cold turkey can give me epileptic fits - I have had one before whilst going cold turkey.

I think what you are coming off are opiate pain relievers (ie. morphine based). I tapered off these also very quickly and it wasn't pleasant but it was bearable. Do you have anyone in your house who can support you. I think you will feel like the worst flu has hit you ever. I am no expert, there are others on this board who are and please try to find their posts and read them. I understand that you have the time at the moment with work and you want to sieze the opportunity. Be very careful though. If you feel that you can't do it mid detox then take a tablet - you will never be a failure.

In regards to your pain, I have had 4 x spinal operations in the last 2 yrs and have experienced severe pain and yes, the IV pethidine in hospital didn't even work in the end because of my high tolerance to the drugs. So when I tapered off the morphine pills the pain eased and I needed less and less very quickly. I am now only taking paracetemol for pain only 8 weeks after a major spinal fusion - I really can't believe that it is giving me pain relief, but I suppose the morphine tolerance is out of my system.

You will feel soooooo much better off the pills and will be able to live again. I can smell the flowers, feel the sun and enjoy my kids life instead of being a zombie and controlled by morphine pills.

What a wonderful decision to come to for you. I am very proud of you. Be careful, take care and do exactly what the home detox plan says as it seems very good and thorough. Remember the joy you will feel at the end of the long dark hard tunnel, it will be worth it whichever way you detox.

My best wishes and support to you and God Bless you, Tessa

Hey Lizzy, I have to agree with Fitz. Everyone has their way and I can only tell you how I got off of 370 hydocodone tablets a month. I tapered. Slowly. Since I used online drug dealers, thats what I call them, I let the prescriptions run out and then blocked their daily emails to have me reconsult. When I had my last bottle, I went from 8-10 a day to 6, and every 3 or 4 days, dropped down a pill. I did the math on how much I had left and spread 120 out over one month to one a day, and then even 1/2 a day. (Just before bedtime to sleep)

By doing it this way, I had a definite quit date, did not shock my system into a major withdrawal, but had mini withdrawals each time I tapered. They were not really bad, just yawning and a little jumpiness at night, but just for one night at a time.

When I finally quit, it was not that noticable in the short term. The long term is a different story. Fighting off what I call phantom withdrawal or maybe very real ones, not sure, 10 days, 20 days, 30 days, and now 40 days later was really a shock to me. However, I've been more normal and fine than not.

I hope you do quit. However, do it safely, look at the detox plan at the top of the boards for good advice, and make the committment if you can with clear goals.

Cold Turkey can be tough. As an aside, getting off suboxone I've heard is VERY difficult. From the miriad of posts I have read, the majority of people and experts don't recommend it. Too each is his or her own though.

How are you now?

Tripleair :jester:

Thanks everyone. I've tried to stop the pills before but hated the withdrawals and couldn't follow through. However, this time I am VERY motivated and can't wait to have this crap out of my life! Also, a few months ago I was on the Fentanyl patch (100mcg) and I was able to go off of that pretty much c/t. I did a very quick taper and the withdrawals for that were awful so I do know what I'm in for here.

I'm really happy to have this time off - I was really bummed that I had to miss my cruise due to having surgery but I'm happy that I'll be able to use this time for something good. And when I do go on my cruise (hopefully reschedule for December) I'll be pill free!! Everyone kept telling me that things happen for a reason and now I think I know the reason :)

I know for myself that I really can't do a real taper of decreasing the pills by one every week or something like that. I know that I would give in on a hard day (which I know there are a lot of) and I would go back to taking a lot of pills. So for me going c/t is best. I know physically it's not good for the body but I think it's the only way I'll be able to beat this addiction.

Day one starts tomorrow...

Wow, it's barely into day 1 and I'm already wanting to give in for the day and "just start tomorrow". I'm not feeling any withdrawals at all because it's way too early but it's the mental part that's hard. I want to take those pills so so bad. And it doesn't help that I still have over 100 pills. Things would be easier if I didn't have anything. And I do need to keep some pills because I still have that stent in going up into my kidney and there is some pain associated with it, and the norco does relieve that pain.

The thing that is keeping me focused and ready to start today is the fact that I only have 5 days off work and so the longer I put this off, the more likely it will be that I'll be some terrible withdrawals at work and I don't want that. I know that I need to get rid of these pills because at this point they are just tempting me big time. I think I'll keep enough to try and do some sort of fast taper but the rest I need to just flush away.

Oh my this is going to be hard!!!!

Hi lizzy,

First of all - congratulations, for recognizing that you NEED to get rid of those pills. However, can you do it? Can you keep a certain amount (maybe 6-8 pills) and get rid of the rest? Do you have someone who can hold those 6-8 pills?

If there's one thing I know for sure - you CAN'T have those pills available to you, like you do right now. We've all tried this, and "most" of us couldn't do it. Please take your own advice and give them to someone and flush the rest away.

My hubby, for example, has mine (I am almost done tapering) they are kept in a locked bank bag (yep, thats right) which he takes to work with him everyday, in his briefcase.

I completely understand how you're feeling - regarding "I will do this tomorrow" Wow, if I had a dollar for every time I said that!!

Stay strong my dear, and stay focused - you are doing a GREAT job.

Love and hugs,
emsmom

Emsmom, thanks for your encouragement. I live alone and no one knows about my addiction except for a friend who lives in Florida - I'm in Southern California. I do like the idea of having someone hold onto the pills for me and I have a lot of friends in the area but I'm just not ready to tell anyone about this. I'm scared enough as it is right now.

I've counted out the pills that I have left and it's a total of 125. I've decided to do a little bit longer of a taper instead of going c/t today. Yesterday I took 20 pills (norco 10/325) and today I've taken 8. Tomorrow I'm going to take 7, then the next day I'll drop it to 6, and then to 5 and so on. I'm not sure if this will help or not but it must be a tiny bit better than just stopping everything at once.

Has anyone tried detox tea? I'm going to start drinking that today and I'm hoping it will help a little, although I'm not expecting much. But I figure any little bit will help.

I'm really very motivated to stop and I'm so excited about getting my life back and not being tied down to these awful pills!! I've been talking about quitting (I posted here about a month ago) and was always on the fence about things but I really really feel it inside of me that I can do this because I'm actually READY to do it!

Hi again lizzy,

First of all, I agree with a taper, rather than c/t however, thats only my opinion. So, you went from 20 down to 8? Thats amazing!! I would recommend you did 8 for a couple days, let your body w/d and then stablize, then cut that down to 5 for two days, then down to 2 for two days. Then the detox won't be harsh at all.

BUT...its still NOT going to be easy. I was taking 500-700 mgs of Oxycontin a day - three weeks ago. Thats equivalent to over 100 percocets...in one day. I am now down to 40-50 mgs, equivalent to 8 - 10 percocets. I really feel its a huge accomplishment thus far, however it was NOT an easy ride. I suffered horrible withdrawals, and I mean horrible. I can't imagine having gone cold turkey on the amounts I was on. In fact, my doctor was very against it. So please don't think of this as a set-back (I hope you're not) however, having those pills in front of you, and no one else knowing is only asking for trouble. I've been there. I hid my addiction for two years...and NO ONE knew. I tried so many times to do it on my own, and I failed every time. Thats not to say that you will fail, but its a fact that this disease is endless unless we tell someone, and get help.

I do know for a fact, that you will not tell anyone else, until you are ready. I get that. However, is there antone you can think of (that comes to mind right now) that you could confide in? If so, just think about it. You'd be so surprised how people handle this stuff. I was SO surprised. All in all, if you're not ready to tell anyone else, than you won't so thats prefectly ok...but it would be ALOT easier if someone else knew. For you and for your recovery.

As for work next week - is there any chance you can get more time off? It doesn't sound like it. My suggestion would be to taper down to 2 pills, then on a Friday night, detox. Throughout that weekend, you'll have wd's and it won't be pretty, but from what I've read, you should be ok for Monday to go back to work. And if anything should happen (you need another day) don't be afraid to call in sick. Keep in mind that work will always be there, and this is a disease you must take care of.

I'm proud of you for sharing your experience and I hope to read more :)

All the best,
Hugs,
emsmom

Lizzy,
Have you ever quit before since you started? I think you said you did. Here is something I've heard from others and it is definitely something I've experienced. If you have quit and detoxed before, better serveral times, the withdrawals seem to be less intense. For me, this is the 4th time in a year I've gone without for more than 10 days. This last time I took my last pill, the physical symptoms were FAR less intense than they were the first time I quit.

I'm also writing this for anyone else who might be afraid of the physical symptom part of stopping. Everybody is different so I can't make any promises, but I'm hopeful that I'm right about this.

Again, it is the mental part. The negotiations, the I need a few for some energy voices, I'm stressed voices, whatever your addiction says to you. ANother thing that has helped me is that when you are ready to break down, stop yourself from finding more pills and breathe, make a 15 minute promise to wait. Often, the cravings are just that, they only last a short while.

Anyway, I support you and hope that you decide to taper........slowly. It also truly lessons the effects of the physical symptoms.

Tripleair:jester:

Hi, I am new to this thread and I wanted to thank you all for being on this board. Reading all of your messages just gave me my first glimmer of hope. I just went to my first day of outpatient rehab and I've never been so discouraged. They made me feel even more horrible than I already felt. I don't expect them to be good to me or anything but one minute they lectured me how I was ruining my life and my body and the next they said they don't know what to do with me because they normally deal with more serious things like alcohol and meth.
I've been taking around 30+ Lortab 10mg a day for a long time now. After my husband found them and left me, I new I had to do something. I've been wanted to stop for so long and just have been so alone. My husband came back and is trying to understand and support me, but is having a difficult time doing so.
The rehab center didn't have any confidence in me that I could taper, but reading your posts I have alot more confidence in myself and for once I am seeing a very dim light at the end of the tunnel. Tell me this can be done! Or do I have to lock myself up? They are telling me it's impossible and I can't do it. I've never really ever tried so how do they know? I left today feeling less confident than ever. I think they were disappointed I didn't have any serious mental issues or past secrets to share, I just like the pills, I like feeling happy, period. My session was to be 2 hours long and it took 45 minutes because I didn't have any other issues. Is counciling worth it for me then?

Well I made it through yesterday with only taking 8 pills!!! I can't believe it... I was tempted so many times to just pop 4 more but I resisted the urges and came out on top!

BsChikie... I've been in treatment several times over the past few years - 5 residential centers and a few outpatient centers as well. I couln't believe what you were saying about how things went yesterday. Treatment should be a place where you go and feel safe and feel like you can freely share your struggles, feelings, etc. For you to leave feeling so bad about yourself is a bad sign. I would highly recommend looking for another treatment facility, one that is way more sympathetic to what you're going through. Also, regardless of whether or not you have "issues" from the past, you were/are addicted to pain meds and there is a reason for it beyond just wanting to feel happy. Pills mask our real feelings and for you it sounds like you can't be as happy in real life without taking pills. There is a reason for that... it may not feel like there is, but there is.

The first time I went to a residential facility for treatment for anorexia I didn't think I had any issues to talk about. My family are all very supportive and we all pretty much get along, and up to that point my life had been very "normal". Well, everything was normal with the exception of the fact that I weighed 87 pounds at a height of 5'6. No matter how much I felt there was nothing wrong, my actions said there was definitely something wrong. I would encourage you to find a different therapist, and a different program and give therapy a chance, beyond one or two sessions.. it takes time to get to know a therapist and the more they know you and you know them you would be surprised at what can come up.

Also, to get more replies to your situation I would suggest opening up a new thread. I'm afraid that your situation might get lost in the middle of this one. Hang in there!

Ugh. I didn't do so well today. I took 12 pills. Yesterday I only took 8. It's still better than taking 20 but it's not the progress I was hoping for. Tomorrow I'm going to only take 6. That's it. 6. I decided to do a little bit of a taper since I have the pills to be able to do it but I think I need to really plan this out better. And once I have it planned out I need to count out the pills I'll need to taper and get rid of the rest. I think that's the only way I'll be able to do this.

Hi lizzy,

Thats a great idea!! To count out the pills you'll need and throw the rest away. That way - you can't afford to have a set-back, cause you will eventually run out and thats NOT good.

Good for you for recognizing that you have to plan it out better. I hope you're proud of yourself. Don't be so hard on yourself for taking 12...yesterday was yesterday. Today is a new day, and tomorrow is tomorrow. Make sense? You recognized that you did something wrong, and thats a great step.

Good luck, you are doing a great job :)

Hugs,
emsmom

LIZZY76,girl, you have to go see a doctor you can not do this by yourself.it`s nice for people to say "you can do it" but at the end of the day you did not. My first message to you stated that it was gonna be tough and i kinda knew you were not gonna make it. forget the pat`s on the back and take the real approach to this problem or you`ll give up completely.This is a big problem, it takes proffesional help, no typing, go get help.peace.fitz.

Fitz, I completly agree with you. My brother had a big time problem with Vicoden for years. I had him stay over my house many times trying to taper down and withdraw from them. Tapering was also impossible for him. He was going out of his mind. There were times I was afraid he would kill himself. He was taking 20-30 vics a day.

Finally I took him to my doctor who is a great guy and agreed to help. He gave him the meds he needed to taper and detoxed. The only thing he requested that he sees him once a week for at least 3 months. He even gave him a break on charging him for office visits and also gave him a bunch of med samples to use.


So far so good. My brother has been clean for over a year now and hasn't looked back. He is now working and paying back what he owes to the doctor.

There are still a lot of good doctors out there to help you. Don't get discouraged about what may happen with one doctor or what you may hear from others. One of the first steps in getting better is asking for help.

Joe

Joe55, Thankyou brother but write a note to lizzy, i`m glad for you and your brother, them vics will mess you up and we as addicts are completely helpless to fight it by are selves, lizzy if you are reading this go to a doc and get on a suboxone program it is the only thing that will save you. And please all you who say she can do it you are just giving her false hope. I don`t only call it the way i see it , I call it the way it is.........peace.fitz

Fitz and Joe, I'm afraid you might be right. I have been trying to tell myself that I can do this, that I can taper no problem. But it is a problem and it's just too hard. I still can't get myself to flush the pills away, no matter how much I know it's a good idea.

Like most people, I'm afraid to go to a doctor about this. I don't know why... I've seen doctors for my fair share of "shameful" things, like self harm, suicide, anorexia, and depression. I have a lot of experience meeting with doctors and telling them my most guarded secrets. I don't know why I can't do this. Maybe it's because that with the other conditions I had to see the doctor - the self harm had to be fixed through emergency surgery, I overdosed on pills and was found unconscious, I was clearly underweight with the anorexia... all of those conditions basically spoke for themselves, whereas this does not. I can hide this a lot easier than I could anything else.

I'm scheduled to see my primary care doctor the beginning of October but I'm not sure if I should wait that long. I guess the one good thing is that I finally want to be done with these pills.... prior to this I was very ambivilent about things. So that's progress.

fitz, joe and lizzy,

I do agree with fitz and joe, however I was just trying to pass on some encouraging words. I apologize if I said something to offend anyone, moreso if something I said would or has hindered lizzy's progress.

I hope there are no hard feelings.

Sincerely,
emsmom

EMSMOM, No hard feelings from me and i pretty sure no one else.I think it`s great when so many people care enough to jot down a message, I just know that lizzy is in for a real rough time. Lizzy, hit me back and let me know if you read this, here we go, first, do you have insurance,can you take more time off work. If you answered yes to the first and no to the second then you need to go to suboxone registered doctor{not all doctors are} and get on a simple program that will set you straight, suboxone is powerful stuff make no mistake. If you can take time off then go to a seven day detox, they will use methodone to bring you in for a soft landing, I know i`ve been there. Then when you get out ask to be treated with suboxone and put on a program that will give you a great opportunty to speak with a counselor{probably a physc} for a few months then the ball is in your court again because suboxone is like changing seats on the titanic, you will still have to ween yourself down real slow but most everyone here can help you with that. Well that was easy, now find a sub doc and write us all back with some really really good news....peace fitz;)

Wow, it's barely into day 1 and I'm already wanting to give in for the day and "just start tomorrow". I'm not feeling any withdrawals at all because it's way too early but it's the mental part that's hard. I want to take those pills so so bad. And it doesn't help that I still have over 100 pills. Things would be easier if I didn't have anything. And I do need to keep some pills because I still have that stent in going up into my kidney and there is some pain associated with it, and the norco does relieve that pain.

The thing that is keeping me focused and ready to start today is the fact that I only have 5 days off work and so the longer I put this off, the more likely it will be that I'll be some terrible withdrawals at work and I don't want that. I know that I need to get rid of these pills because at this point they are just tempting me big time. I think I'll keep enough to try and do some sort of fast taper but the rest I need to just flush away.

Oh my this is going to be hard!!!!

Ofcourse its hard if not impossible to do yourself. Have you though of seeking professional help?
Weening yourself is probably the way to go. However as long as you have the means to keep getting the pills, you will eventually relapse, especially if you have no outside support.
I speak from many years of addiction. I was addicted to demeral and dilaudid for a long time. I haven't had those drugs for 6 years. I was a nurse with access to more then one could imagine.
While withdrawl stinks, you wont die from it (not from opiates)

Thanks for your replies. My internet is down and will be for awhile. There is a problem with my laptop so I've got to send it in for repairs. I won't have regular access to the internet - I can sometimes get online at work but not often... that's where I am right now.

I do have insurance and am seriously thinking about doing either the suboxone thing or just checking myself in to do detox. I don't really have anymore time off work but I can get some, just not right now. It's going to be hard to resist getting any more rx's for norco because I can basically get some at any point. But like I've said, I'm really ready to be off of these pills and get on with my life!!!

Emsmom - thank you so much for your encouraging words. It really means a lot to me and is helpful, even if I can't do this by myself. I wish I could, and I really thought I could but it's not looking like I can. I just can't taper with all of these pills sitting around and tempting me. And I've been unable to flush them, which I guess isn't all that surprising.

I'll be trying to get online when I can... I've got to find a local library lol! I'm going through internet withdrawals right now!!

I'm at the library right now and I just printed off a list of local docs that do suboxone treatment. I'm going to go home and call all of them until I find one that is accepting new patients and hopefully get in this week for an appointment. I'm going out of town next week so hopefully that won't be a problem. I don't know what the typical wait is for this stuff.

I'm not too excited about replacing one medication for another but I think that for right now that's the best option. I'd really like to detox completely from this stuff but since I have access to more pills I think I would be tempted to get some more. So the sub seems to be the best route right now. I'll let you all know how it goes!

Good luck lizzy - and I hope everything works out for you.

Sincerely,
emsmom