I have a 75 yr old mother who is addicted to pain pill (codein) since I can remember (I am 44).
She denies she has a problem.
She has been sent to the hospital more times than I am made aware of - due to falls. This last time she broke her leg.
She has home care for 3 hrs per day, but she waits for them to leave and then takes her pills, home care nurse finds her past out on floor next day-from falls?
My brothers and I live 2,000 miles away from her.
We believe she has the onset of Alzheimers as well.

Here is my situation, please don't hold it against me, but- I CAN'T STAND IT ANYMORE!!!!
She plays mind games with me.
She is hurtful
She never asks about her grandchildren
She never asks about me or my husband
She is pushing me away
I can only take so much (44 years of it) and I am begining to think I would be better of distancing myself from her and her nastiness - Is is the drugs taking?

This is just a short rant.
I hope I'm in the right area of the board.

Please help me

Hey Kmh224, Well Here I Go Again, Lets Look At This Situation Together, Your Mom Is 75 And Been On This Stuff For As Long As You Can Remember Well The Answer For Me Is Easy, Leave Her Alone, I Don`t Think There Is Much Left Of Her Life If She Is What You Say She Is, Let Her Continue Down This Path She Has Been On For So Many Years And Live Your Life I Mean If She Is Getting Alzheimers It`s Just A Matter Of Time Before She Fogets Where She Hid The Pills, I`m Not Trying To Be Funny It`s Just The Fact Of This Life She Has Made For Herself, Call Her From Time To Time Tell Her You Love Her And Pray For Her I`m Afraid Thats All You Can Do For Your Mom At 75 There Aint Much There To Fix Or The Will To Get Fixed.peace. Fitz.

well somebody has to be prescribing these pills..act on it, call her doctors ,try to make them see that she is adddicted. Ive seen it happen to people that age..and the doc just keeps prescibing away..

well somebody has to be prescribing these pills..act on it, call her doctors ,try to make them see that she is adddicted. Ive seen it happen to people that age..and the doc just keeps prescibing away..

Hi Jules3
The unfortunate part of this is the pills she is addicted to are over the counter pills. She gets the strongest pain meds she can without a prescription, and I'm sure she goes to different pharmacies so they don't start asking questions.
I don't know exactly what she's mixing these days, but she use to get tylenol with codein (just by asking the pharmacist) and gravol (anti-nausea med) and benadryl (for allergies). I know the last two make you drowsy.
She does have some meds that she is given by the dr's, but I'm not sure just what they are, I pretty sure she also gets tylenol #3's for her arthritis.

I never had a chance to tell her whole story last time, but this last fall was just one of many.

A couple of years ago she had fallen down the stairs and was not found until the next morning. She is still not sure how she fell, and she had no reason to be near the stairs she fell down. She punctered a lung, received a concusion, had a cut on head that required stitches, and was pretty much bruised up.
Since then she has had numerous falls ( I figure because she was sooo drugged up she is unstable, confused, and just not aware of her suroundings(sp).
A couple of weeks ago, the homecare nurse found her past out beside her bed, soaked in urine. She thinks she fell off her bed? No injuries this time.
She stayed in hospital 1 week, came home friday, sounded great (clear headed) when I spoke to her, I guess she wasn't able to get her hands on any extra meds in the hospital.
Monday I get a call, home care found her on floor again, this time leg broken. She thinks she slammed it in the bathroom door when she got up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom, but she's not sure.
It sure didn't take long to o.d again with 2 days.

The hospital won't let her go home alone, she is going to a retirement home, until the cast comes off. But I know it won't be long after she gets home before this starts up again.

Hey Kmh224, Well Here I Go Again, Lets Look At This Situation Together, Your Mom Is 75 And Been On This Stuff For As Long As You Can Remember Well The Answer For Me Is Easy, Leave Her Alone, I Don`t Think There Is Much Left Of Her Life If She Is What You Say She Is, Let Her Continue Down This Path She Has Been On For So Many Years And Live Your Life I Mean If She Is Getting Alzheimers It`s Just A Matter Of Time Before She Fogets Where She Hid The Pills, I`m Not Trying To Be Funny It`s Just The Fact Of This Life She Has Made For Herself, Call Her From Time To Time Tell Her You Love Her And Pray For Her I`m Afraid Thats All You Can Do For Your Mom At 75 There Aint Much There To Fix Or The Will To Get Fixed.peace. Fitz.

Hi Fitz,
The sad part is I don't think I have the energy or will to even call her anymore. Maybe when the pain of her "meaness" and her "lashing out" simmer in my mind after a while, I will call her, but I don't think it will ever be the same.
I try to convince myself it's the pills talking and not her, but like I said before, How much is one person expected to take before they say "I've got to move on with my own life and do what's best for me, my family, my children and husband"?
KMH

It could very well be the onset of Alzheimer's too. The falling could be from a balance problem that a lot of older people get. Falling then passing out? That could be from the pain meds or maybe a heart problem? A friend of mines Father had heart problems and they found him passed out a few times. It could be anything or a combo of things causing this.

Maybe you should talk with her Doctor and see if he can have her tested for Alzheimer's (if there is a test for it) and have her heart tested, but then I'm sure they already done some heart tests if she has been in the hospital a few times.

I know it must be a hard situation for you, hopefully you can find out what's really going on with her.

-GSX