A majority of threads are started and contributed by femail posters on this site.

Whether they have BP or commonly are dealing with partners who have BP, there is little input from male sufferers. This is understandable if under the grip of mania or depression. However I belive this may also be more typical of male behaviour in trying to deal with the problem without support or help.

I am looking for posts from other male BP sufferers who are prepared to share their thoughts, feelings and suggestions as to how to cope with this diagnosis.

I was diagnosed Type 1 BP in 2002 at the age of 35 following an extreem manic episode for which I was hospitalised. This was followed by 3 years of rapid cycling, which persisted in spite of treatment and compliance with medication. This 3 year period led to the break down of my marriage and loss of a senior job as well as financial difficulties resulting from excessive spending during manic phases.

In August 2005 I came under the care of my current Psychartrist who idetified that regular use on anti-depressants had contributed to my rapid cycling and took me off them as well as being prescribed an additional mood stabliliser, and since then I have been as my support team call it 'relativley stable'. Post divorce, again in August 2005 I have sorted my private life with a new partner, however have only recently been signed off as fit to work again and as yet, remain unemployed.

During my periods of illness I have expirienced all the extreems of mood familiar to both sufferers and carers alike. During mania I acted agressivly towards my partner and acted impulsivly without consideration of my actions in many key areas of my life. Which led to my judgement being questioned (which I found infuriating at the time) and the loss or damage to key relationships in my life and ultimately divorce and job loss.

As my condition has stabilised, I recieve less and less help from my support team and now see my Psychartrist just once every 6 months.

The main area of my life I now wish to improve is my job status. Having enjoyed demanding and challenging roles since graduation, I wish to return to a similar level of challenging well paid employment in the future. However only as recently as early Summer, I became delusional again (whilst not noteably manic) beliving as has been typified by such eppisodes that I in some way have the solution to world peace and harmony (my rispidone was increased and my thinking returned to normal). Clearly if I were to express such belifes in a working invironment my credability would be shot and it would be clear to future collegues and my employer that I have a mental health condition.

The combination of 5 years distruped health and the threat that this illness could start all over again has severly dented my self confidence. Whilst I still take Depakote as a mood stabiliser, my mood seems to have stabilised on the low side and I seem to lack, drive, confidence, creativity etc. All characteristics that I have relyed upon in my previous job roles and now feel lost without. Whilst I recognise that some of these characteristics may return once I am back in employment and presented by day to day challenges, right now I fear being lost in the working environment as I have expirienced these problems when previously trying to work whist dealing with depression.

In short since I have stabliized and no longer represent a threat to my self of others, care and support have been accordingly reduced and I am left to my self to make a return to the mainstream after a 2.5 year absence, not really trusting my own judgement anymore.

I am not interested in support groups, prefering the anominity of this site to express my views and concerns. I would welcome any ideas or views, (particularly although not exclusivly from the male BP point of view) as to how to deal and overcome the damage this illness can cause to ones view of self, and of course to those around us and our relationships.

I look forward to see if anyone posts

Regards

Paul

Paul...I am pleased that you took this challange to start this Thread.
Your story could be a "clone" for so many Male BPers. I know, because I went through almost all what you described in your early undiagnosed years and more.Truly,there is some relief, when we can say that the right combination and dosage of medication is starting to give stability. But compliance is manentory.

You may remember that my history is long one : 26 years of unstable and uncontrolable BP. It took 3 hospitalizations and an attemped sucide, to start any semlance of begining stability. I am now in my 23rd year of stability.

Below,I printed a portion of your post. It appears that your present main concern is reestablishment of your job statue :



The main area of my life I now wish to improve is my job status. Having enjoyed demanding and challenging roles since graduation, I wish to return to a similar level of challenging well paid employment in the future. However only as recently as early Summer, I became delusional again (whilst not noteably manic) beliving as has been typified by such eppisodes that I in some way have the solution to world peace and harmony (my rispidone was increased and my thinking returned to normal). Clearly if I were to express such belifes in a working invironment my credability would be shot and it would be clear to future collegues and my employer that I have a mental health condition.

The combination of 5 years distruped health and the threat that this illness could start all over again has severly dented my self confidence. Whilst I still take Depakote as a mood stabiliser, my mood seems to have stabilised on the low side and I seem to lack, drive, confidence, creativity etc. All characteristics that I have relyed upon in my previous job roles and now feel lost without. Whilst I recognise that some of these characteristics may return once I am back in employment and presented by day to day challenges, right now I fear being lost in the working environment as I have expirienced these problems when previously trying to work whist dealing with depression.
l

Truly,Paul,your job status is perhaps and will be the most challenging goal of maintaining stability with BP. Setting your goals to high by attaining the same level of financial employment as in the past,was the trigger to more episodes.
However, you relized the symptoms of delusions soon enough to take full control with medication change. That was most important. And I hope helped you understand that patience and tolerence of BP is needed in all of your goal settings.

Know and learn to accept that your fears of this illness can and may start over in your present life, is very valid. If your self confidence has changed, then is the time ask why. And working on ways to change your feelings. Again, possible med changes may be necessary. Depression can be controled.
Keep your goals level and strive toward stability,again. Give yourself the benifit of time and patience. Your stability will return. You have a new wife and a new family on the way. Always think in the present ( about them). Never revert back to your older episodes and your troubled past. You can find stability only in your furture !

What I bring to you in these thoughts come from my continued work on my 23 years of stability. It still can be a day to day challange....but I have found that the days can strech father apart when I know that my stability will always continue. It's learning to read the "clues" ;)

I welcome your continued thoughts toward stability,Paul.
I also welcome other Male BPer to your new thread. Together, we can
provide some answers to continued stability.

Carry On,

I have kind of a weird form of BP. Its basically manic and my main symptoms are number 1. severe irratation, which results in a piss poor overall mood and outlook on things. most would think it to be depression if they didn't know any better.... but its not. number 2 would be highly irregular sleeping patterns. wanting to sleep from 7 AM to 3 PM like a rock, but there no way in hell could i sleep from 11 PM to 7 AM. I could lay in bed for hours awake. number 3 was extreme ADHD symptoms. I couldn't remember anything, couldnt pay attention for the life of me, no interest in things, and i was tired ALL the time yet couldn't go to sleep. no matter what I did i couldn't get on a regular sleep pattern. I could sleep as much as I could at night then try to stay awake and somewhere about 8PM i would be sooooooo tired my eyes would just shut, but my body only treated it as a nap and i would wake up around 11 or 12 and I'd be up all night. and my last main symptom was migraine headaches.

I can not take any mood stabilizer that has any antipsychotic properties. I took one pill of geodon once and it paralyzed me in certain parts of my body, i took one pill of serequel and i wasn't right for 2 days. etc. I'm now on Depakote and i was on 2000mg and i couldnt stand it anymore. I had NO ambition or energy to do anything, i could sit and stare at a wall..... literally. or watch TV shows for hours that I didn't even like. I just didn't care about anything. and housework that I had to do i dreaded because I didn't want to get off my ***. my exercise equipment had dust on it.

i could expound more on certain areas if you want but thats my basic story.

Jason :

Your post mostly related to irregular sleeping patterns and some of the anxiety it causes. Two possible causes : 1). A comination of mood stabilizers may may be needed. Check with your pdoc. Two or three mood stabilizers are often perscribed for conteol of sleep patterns. 2) It so happened when I was still going through my episodes, 25 years ago,that I found myself worrying so much about everything and anything. I found that I also complained so much about my Anxiety. I deceided that my Anxieties were some what related to my Worry. However, I reasoned that my worrying seemed to follow my constant procrastination of needs to complete the tasks in front of me. So I decided to take on the task that I was worrying about the most. I told my self not procrastinate any longer,and resolve the task that I was worrying about. And I did resolve it . The worry left me and also my Anxiety level was reduced. I decided that from then on I would not procrastinate on ANYTHING.

What I learned from this was a whole "Chain Reaction" could take place : Reducing Procrastination - Reduces Worry - Reduces Anxiety - Reduces Fears - Reduces Stress - And then Reduces Triggers to Mood Swings - Which Reduces Reoccurrence of BP Episodes.
This,"Chain Reaction" takes practice and time.
Stay with it -- and stay away for Procrastination.
Everything then, will follow !

A majority of threads are started and contributed by female posters on this site.

Whether they have BP or commonly are dealing with partners who have BP, there is little input from male sufferers. This is understandable if under the grip of mania or depression. However I belive this may also be more typical of male behaviour in trying to deal with the problem without support or help.

I am looking for posts from other male BP sufferers who are prepared to share their thoughts, feelings and suggestions as to how to cope with this diagnosis.......................

Paul

Paul,I really don't have the answer why the male BPer will not come forth and discuse and "share their thoughts,feeling and suggestions as to how to cope with this diagnosis." It has been over a week and a half, and only one male has posted beside myself. (yet there has been 160 "views" to this thread.to date).

Perhaps the "answer" needs to come from females who have BP or are dealing ith partners and children who have BP. I know,Paul, that this thread was started for the male BPer. However, If we consider to open it up to the females,we may just see why us male BPer are reluctant to share.

Is it just that males don't "take the time" to share ? (note below).

Hi Guys,

I hope you don't mind me jumping in here, I am not BP but my b/f has been diagnosed BP1. I am having a hard time trying to communicate with him about what's going on with him. I often get the silent treatment from him. I think this is a typical male pride thing in not wanting to discuss their feelings as it may make them sound "weak" and not feeling masculine. I think most men, BP or not, don't like to open up and talking about their thoughts or feelings, so I would imagine if they have BP they would feel some kind of embarressment and also that no-one is going to understand how they feel so they just keep themselves to themselves and try to sort it out alone. It's such a shame, if only they would reach out for help they would find so much relief finding someone else that is going through the same. I think thats why us women, when we have a problem the first thing we do is get on the phone and talk to our girlfriends about our feelings, just having someone listen sometimes makes me feel so much better about getting everything out, even if I know there is nothing that they can say or suggest to help, having some support goes along way. I personally find a man more attractive and genuine when they are happy to discuss and give their opinions on their thoughts and feelings! Just my two pennies worth anyway!

Paul, Congratualtions by the way with the good news on the soon-to-be new addition to the family!

wend x

Wend x :

Thanks for being so honest with your thoughts on why the males find it so hard to share their feeling on BP. What else can I say exect that you really "hit the nail on the head".

Perhaps we males need to "Start changing our thoughts,so that we can change our life." This comes from a resent book that's now on the best sellers list by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer. He discuses 81 verse from Tao Te Ching,which are regarded by many as the ultimate commentary on the nature of our existance. "Living in the Flow" is one of the verses. The Tao asks us to behave and move like "water". When your free to flow as water,you're free to communicate naturally---information is exchanged,and knowledge advances in a way that benefits everyone. I would challange us males with BP to simply start "flowing like water". We may just be able to open up with our feelings and step out of the "box" that keeps us from stability.

What are your thoughts guys ? Ladies continue to give us your thoughts, too.

Carry On

Hello EYES ~

You haven't been posting much. How is the rehab going? I imagine the second knee is harder than the first....

Could you pop over to another thread and add your wisdom? It is called "When is enough, enough" )or words to that effect. I think you'll pick up the gist of it fairly quickly and he could really use some help!!

Take good care,

Tsohl

Hello EYES ~

You haven't been posting much. How is the rehab going? I imagine the second knee is harder than the first....

Could you pop over to another thread and add your wisdom? It is called "When is enough, enough" )or words to that effect. I think you'll pick up the gist of it fairly quickly and he could really use some help!!

Take good care,

Tsohl

Tsohl : My rehab on both knees is coming to halt. Will see my "bone" man today for final check up. ( my goal is to walk with and as fast as Mrs. Eyes every morning by christman time :D ). I hear that a back surgery is in your furture? You sure have done your reaseach.

I posted on the "Enough is Enough" thread. It seems like very few males want to share their thoughts and feelings when it comes to dealing with BP on this thread.

Perhaps, if they wounder over to the other thread,they may even benifit from what I had to say.

Us fellows needed to follow a "GAME PLAN" when we played football or basketball,or we lost tht "Game". :mad: My point here is that a "GAME PLAN" is needed to deal with BP......Or you again will loose.

Hope someone responds with more suggestions ...