I wonder if anyone can give me their opinion on my exposure and if you think I need to have an HIV test. I want to know if oral sex between two woman is risky for HIV transmission? This girl that I've been seeing for a couple of months now has informed me that she's actually been with a couple of men too. The only thing we did when we were together was have oral sex - both giving and receiving. Is this what they call a risky activity? I've heard so many conflicting reports that yes it is and no it isn't.
We were both not menstrating at that point in time, so there was no blood involved, but what about vaginal fluids - is that not a high risk? :(

I'm going to say you're probably fine. You don't know if she even has HIV first of all. Even if she did, you'll still be fine. Although saliva has been known to carry very small trace amount of HIV, it is usually not enough to infect another person. A study once followed 13 indivduals who had been bitten by HIV positive people. The bites HAD broken the skin and saliva had entered the blood stream. All 13 people tested negative. Now, there is the potential as cited by the CDC amongst other reliable sources that have reported that people HAVE contracted hiv through oral sex. Understand though that this number is incredibly low and it doesn't happen often. At any rate, I would get tested just to be sure.

Thank you for your reply. So basically what you're saying is that if there was no blood involved then I really have nothing to worry about? If it was ever transmitted this way - female to female ... how would this happen?
I've spoken to her and she has informed me that I've got nothing to worry about as she's HIV negative, a lesbian and has never been with a man or done drugs. Your opinion would really be appreciated. Have you got any medical, HIV knowledge?

a lesbian and has never been with a man or done drugs.

Just because she's a lesbian doesn't mean she's HIV negative. Don't let that fool you. :)

Just because she's a lesbian doesn't mean she's HIV negative. Don't let that fool you. :)
very true, but i don't think there is even a recorded transmission of hiv ever in that manner so for it to happen would be pretty far out there.
i think there are only a couple of cases from oral sex and they were being done on a male and a few extreme circumstances were going on also besides the sex like bad sores,bleeding and things that would be very obvious.
getting hiv thru oral sex is a rare thing. possible? yes
probable? no

i wouldn't stress over it myself
good luck

very true, but i don't think there is even a recorded transmission of hiv ever in that manner so for it to happen would be pretty far out there.
i think there are only a couple of cases from oral sex and they were being done on a male and a few extreme circumstances were going on also besides the sex like bad sores,bleeding and things that would be very obvious.
getting hiv thru oral sex is a rare thing. possible? yes
probable? no

i wouldn't stress over it myself
good luck

Yeah, that is extremely rare. I just meant that so many people are confused about others who are lesbian, gay or bisexual. ANYONE could have it reguardless of what you are. That's what I should of said. :)

Thank you for your responses guys, I really do appreciate them. She promised me that she's HIV Negative, has never been with a man, never done drugs and there was no blood or sores visible. I was more on the receiving end too, so I guess I'm only really being exposed to her saliva. Are you all in agreement with me there? Do you honestly feel that I should still go and have an HIV test done? I feel so alone and desperatly confused at the moment, so your comments would be appreciated! :confused:
Thank you!!

Sorry, forgot to add ..... does anyone know if there has been transmission from oral sex woman to woman? Not sure how this would actually happen. I mean afterall, don't we all practice oral sex and believe that this is a form of 'safe sex'. They're always promoting condoms, but never dental dams for oral sex .... why do you think that is?

Are you all in agreement with me there?

Yes. I think you'll be fine. I've never heard it of, but then again I'm no doctor. :) If it's really getting to you then have a test done.. Just to put your mind at ease.

Hi AmberD .... thank you for your post. I feel as if I've been on every website dedicated to HIV and transmission - some say it isn't a risk and some say it is. You just don't know what to believe anymore and it is so frustrating. Where I live in South African ... there aren't too many testing stations, so I'm not sure how I'm actually going to go and have it done. I've now developed a really sore mouth - bumps on my upper and lower gums. I'm really stressing out now that this has something to do with being infected. I'm going out of my mind with worry.
Can I ask you ..... how did you come across this site and have you got a similar situation like mine? This is all so scary!:(

You're welcome. :) I've always been interested in health/body and enjoy giving/receiving advice. So here I am! No, I've never been in a situation like yours, but I do know someone with HIV. Unfortunately she does not take care of herself properly and is going down hill.

If I were you I'd call around to different clinics and see if you can set up an appointment just to be safe.

Thank you Amber for your encouragment and help - I really do appreciate it. Here's hoping I have nothing to worry about - afterall, doesn't every couple practice oral sex and there hasn't been documented cases? This is my real question to all.
I'm sorry to hear about your friend, but just remember that you're support and help will encourage her every day. Must say ... if I do turn out to be HIV positive, I'd love to have you as a friend! You seem really caring and supportive! THANK YOU!

Smilter .... please can you comment on this for me!

Hi AmberD .... thank you for your post. I feel as if I've been on every website dedicated to HIV and transmission - some say it isn't a risk and some say it is. You just don't know what to believe anymore and it is so frustrating. Where I live in South African ... there aren't too many testing stations, so I'm not sure how I'm actually going to go and have it done. I've now developed a really sore mouth - bumps on my upper and lower gums. I'm really stressing out now that this has something to do with being infected. I'm going out of my mind with worry.

No problem! I try to be supportive, but you can't help someone that doesn't want to help themselves. SO with that said I just have to sit back and watch. I do wish you the best of luck though. :angel:

Thank you Amber .... I really do want to help myself, believe me....I'm just really scared and often think to myself, it might be better not knowing as you can't change it if you are. Not sure if that makes sense to you, but I'M JUST SO NERVOUS! You're a very supportive person Amber and I just hope your friend realises that too!:angel:

I'm just really scared and often think to myself, it might be better not knowing as you can't change it if you are. Not sure if that makes sense to you, but I'M JUST SO NERVOUS!

It's always best to know. Especially if you are sexually active your partner(s) needs to know. It does make sense to me to be nervous. But if it were me I'd want to know asap! I guess that's because I am impatient. LOL

Thanks Amber .... I know you're right and I really need to go and do this so that I can finally put this nightmare behind me. Here's hoping all is okay!
Thanks for your patience, caring and support!

To my knowledge, no, there has never been a recorded case of HIV transmission in this manner. A common misconception by most is that saliva contains HIV. While there is SOME truth to this, most of what is found in saliva is HIV antibodies. I highly doubt that you could have gotten HIV in this manner. I'm not sure what to tell you, if you can't get tested, you may never know. However, i am almost 100% positive that you do not have HIV. I really would not worry.

Now, about the bumps on your lips, that does sound consistent with perhaps herpes oh something of that nature. If possible, get checked.

Thank you smar for your comments - helps relieve abit of my anxiety I'm having at the moment.
Of all the HIV websites I've been onto, pretty much of them say the same thing too. That there has never been a documented case of HIV transmission via cunninglus, so I'm sure I'm going to be okay - WELL, AT LEAST I PRAY EVERYDAY I'LL BE!
As far as the bumps I have. They aren't situated on my lips, but rather on the lower and upper back of my gums. I've had dental problems for awhile now, so I'm not sure if that's the cause and I'm a smoker. What do you think?

Hm...that's odd that they're on your gums. While that is a symptom consistent with HIV, it does NOT mean that you have it. Sadly, the only way to know for sure is to get tested, but since that's difficult in your area, you really may never know. I do know you can get an at home test where you swab your mouth and send it in and they'll mail you back the results.
However, I am confident you do not have HIV. The bumps on your lips could be from dental issues as you said you were experiencing. oral sex simply is not one of the modes of transmission for HIV.

I don't know if I mentioned this before, but saliva is known to deactivate anywhere from 90-99% of the HIV virus. There simply is not enough of the virus in saliva to infect you, the viral load is far to low.

Thank you smar for your comments. Now you've really got me worried that these bumps I have on my gums are consistant with HIV. When I showed them to my dentist about 3 months ago, she said that she couldn't see them, although I can feel them. I've had them for quite awhile now - going on for about 2 years. Been to an oral hygenist too, but again they said that they couldn't see anything, so there wasn't anything to worry about. They just feel like a whole group of bumps on the back of my lower and upper gums - not visable, but I can feel them when I rub my tongue up against them. What do you think? Do you honestly believe that this could be HIV related?

Oh, also forgot to ask you - how far into HIV would you have mouth problems? And would this be one of them?
Meant to also ask you if you've got any medical expierence of knowledge of HIV and ways it's transmitted.
Thank you

I think you misunderstood me, you do NOT have HIV. It would be impossible for you to have gotten it from that risk. In fact, I don't even like calling it a risk since it wasn't one. You really need to stop worrying, you're doing what I did when I thought I had HIV. You work yourself into a world of worry and nothing anyone says will deter you from thinking about it. Eventually you either need counseling or it goes away (my anxiety went away). It's not worth letting HIV consume your life. The bumps in your mouth really could be anything, don't let it get down to "oh no, it HAS to be HIV". Now, don't quote me on this one, as I am actually researching this right now just for you, but I do NOT think that bumps in the mouth are a sign of early infection of HIV. I do believe that comes many many years down the road. I will know for sure in at most an hour or two, so check back then for a definite answer.

And for the record, all of my information comes from the CDC and I have done my research. I am not a doctor, and not even a doctor could diagnose you simply through symptoms alone, only a test can do that. I do know quite a bit about the virus off the top of my head since I find it very interesting and I do know how it can be transmitted. I can honestly say that the way you think you got it is not a mode of transmission.

Thank you smar for your post - help me put my mind to ease abit as I got really worried from your last message.
So basically what you're saying is that I really never had a risk of contracting HIV through that manner? Afterall we were only transmitting saliva and what I've read is that it has properties not to infect someone.
The bumps at the back of my upper and lower gums have been there for quite some time now and didn't really appear after the incident happened. It could possibly be from stress, smoking or cancer? Not sure ... really worried, but don't think it's from HIV.
What is your opinion on this?:(

Unfortunately, I don't know since I'm not a dentist. After reviewing the Center for Disease control's website, I've read that there has never been a case of HIV transmitted through saliva. I highly doubt you'd be the first case. Now, that's not to say that you couldn't have gotten something like herpes or syphilis. You need to get an STD test because those bumps really could be anything, and like I tell everyone else, you cannot diagnose HIV based on symptoms.

Thank you for your post.
As much as I tend to agree with you, I still get this nagging feeling in my head. I've read countless websites regarding HIV and STD's and ways it's transmitted and most of them say that there has never been a recorded case through cunnilingus, so with all this in mind, I'm going to try and put these feelings aside and get on with my life. Thank you Smar for taking the time to hear me out, patience and support! If my dentist didn't pick up anything too serious then why should I worry, hey??

That's the spirit =)

I checked many different websites because after you brought this up, I too became curious. Amongst those websites was the CDC, the Center for Disease control. According to them, there is no recorded case of HIV through saliva.

So, as long as there was no blood in the saliva, you are just fine, and even if there was, the odds of you contracting it are incredibly low, so I really just wouldn't worry.

Hi Smar .... I'm really trying not to worry about the whole situation and pray each day that I haven't infected myself by this one off encounter. The reports I've been reading pretty much say the same thing - if there was no blood or sores involved (which I didn't see any) then I really have nothing to worry about. Think I'm going to stick it out and closer to the D Day, maybe go and have the test done to put my mind to rest. Can I ask you the reason why you're on this site? We're you infected or effected by HIV in some way too?
God Bless you!

Hey if you can get yourself tested, more power to you. I highly recommend it, as it will definately put your mind at ease. A test is cold hard proof of whether or not you have it (and i promise to you, you will be negative). I'm on this site because I thought I might have had HIV because of a highly unprofessional tattoo I got which now I regret because it looks horrible. Turns out, tattoos aren't a mode of HIV transmission, but prior to coming on here, I pretty much spent day and night researching everything I possibly could about HIv and sifting through what's true and what's not. Eventually, I came here and they told me to stop worrying, etc. Anyways, after that, I kind of just stuck around.

Hi Smar
This whole HIV thing is really quite scary, hey.
I'm going to try my best to go and have the test done, so that I can eventually put this whole thing behind me ... afterall I think all the worrying and checking every mark on my body, etc is too much for me. I just don't know where to go and have it done, as I live in quite a remote place. Did you go and have the test done yourself or are you just going to leave it?

Well, I was going to get a test, but since HIV has never been transmitted via Tattoo, I'm just going to leave it. However, there could easily be times where I had it transmitted in other ways. I'm not worried since I know that I'll be fine, but everyone should still get tested. You need to get tested, or get counseling. Don't let it consume your life.

Hi Smar
I totally agree with you - you never know until you actually have the test done! I'm not going to stress about my situation any longer either - there's never been a recorded case of HIV getting transmitted via cunnilingus, so I need to get on with my life.
Thank you Smar for all your time, patience and support.
I'm sure we will both be fine!;)

There you go =)
Remember, if you can't stop thinking about it, get counseling.

Life's no fun if you can't stop worrying.

good luck! =D

Thank you Smar ..... I'm trying to put all this behind me ... to get on with my life and not to worry about it. Afterall, everyone that I've spoken to say's it's not a form of transmission, so like you, I think I'm worrying for no reason. I wish you all the best too and hope that you get past this too!
Good Luck!

I can't think tonight, extremely tired, but yeah, no more worries. Remember, if you need to, there's no shame in seeing a counseler. I'll probably respond more later, but I'm very tired, it's been a long night.

good night all

After doing some more research, I can tell you that I have not been able to find a single documented case of HIV being transmitted in this way. Get tested if you're still unsure, but really, you have nothing to worry about. If your anxiety persists, then I recommend getting counseling. Don't go through life worrying about nothing.

Good luck =)