Well I am trying to not think negative, but I really am scared. I started not feeling well yesterday (day 8 of stims), and then thru the night the pressure and discomfort in my abdomen escalated. This morning I felt nausea (probably nerves) and quite a bit fatigued and out of breath.

Was in tears on the drive to the doctor and even still when I got there this morning (so embarassing :( ). I had my u/s (which was fairly painful) and it showed a whole bunch of follies again... maybe too many. So far there are a significant number that are quite small at 12 or so, but there are some leads on each side at 19/20. I couldn't look much at the screen cause I was so uncomfortable with that stupid wand pressing on my swollen ovaries. The RE said they would count all of them tomorrow and they just counted the large ones today.

They are gonna see what my E2 comes back at. Yesterday it was only 839... on day 8 of stims during my cancelled cycle it was over 2900. My RE said he'd still like to trigger tomorrow and E/R on Mon, but he wants to do an u/s tomorrow to take a look at the smaller follies. He is hoping that they don't start to catch up :confused: He mentioned we might postpone the E/R until Tues (which I think means we might have to coast a day :confused: :( :( :( ).

I don't know why I respond like this. I'm fearful again that maybe they won't do transfer b/c of the risk of severe OHSS. And last cycle when I started with that fear we ended up cancelling the whole thing altogether. I heard the nurse tell the RE today that they already have the order of what ever medicine is used intraveinously during E/R to help fend of OHSS (starts with an "a" but I can't remember the name). I hate this.... I hate the fear I am feeling. I just pray the NP calls back with good news about my E2.

Kari, Im sorry you dont feel good, but dont give up hope. Why isn't he triggering you already though, if you dont mind me asking? Are you still on follistim now? Or he just has you coasting? He must know better though , he has the full picture.
I think my biggest follie was around 19 when RE had me trigger that same evening. They still get to grow until retrieval, and all of mine were matured.
Good luck,
Mady

Kari

I am so sorry that you are going through all this..........i am also sure that the added stress is not doing you any good so ....i know it s so much easy said and done ....but try to take it easy. Spend some time with DH.......i am sure he will help you feel better.

Also remember the faith that you have in your dr.....you throughout thic cycle showed the particular attention to each and every single day of your cycle. I am sure that he has experience in the field and i am sure that history won t repeat itself.

It is completely normal for you too be afraid and anxious but remember you are in very good hands.I am praying hard that your E2 levels will come back ok and that you will get good news from your u/s tomorrow so that you can out your mind at rest.

Sending you big hugs

Amy

Hey Kari, I'm so sorry you are going through all this worry. I'm not surprised you are fearful after last time, but your numbers are so much lower this time, I'm sure you will be ok. I hope you manage to rest up until your u/s and take it as easy as you possibly can. Take lots of deep breaths and get DH to look after you. Massive hugs and good luck. Keep us posted. Thinking of you & praying for you,
Lizzie

Kari, I'm so sorry you're feeling scared and you're in pain. I wish there was something I could do as you've been so kind to me during this cycle. I will be praying for good e2 levels and a positive outcome. Hang in there and I hope the pain subsides a bit. - April

Oh you guys, thank you so much for your encouragement. I have been sitting here taking lots of deep relaxing breaths (good advice Lizzie;) ), and trying to get my mind focused on relaxing my body. I know that my very experienced RE and his NP care so much about seeing me all the way thru this cycle... and if I can keep that thought at the forefront of all others, I believe I can stay calm. And I believe that staying calm is going to be very important if I want to make it to E/R and to E/T. So that is my plan. Good thoughts from here forward, right?

Mady, I'm not totally sure why we aren't triggering yet, but I have a feeling it's b/c a majority of my follies are like at 14/15... he told me today that most of the follies he saw on the screen he would not be able to get eggs out of. Guess we are hoping those 14's/15's catch up, but the smaller ones don't. Jeesh, I am a tough nut to crack!

Just gotta keep drinking my smartwater and get through one more day. Then everything will be cool. :cool:

Kari, I have to run to a meeting, so I don't have much time to write, but I just wanted you to know I'll be thinking of you. I am so sorry you have to worry about all this again!!!! Take good care of yourself sweetie. I will write more later.

Holly

Kari, dear friend, I wish I knew what to say!! I don't know how to help you, an dthat makes me feel bad because you always know the right thing to say!

But darling, I'm sure your dr knows exactly what he is doing. I think, from what I have gathered, he is very attentive and he would learn from last time, dearest.

Is there any way to stay calm that would get you to get your mind off of this? Maybe eat lobster?
(It tastes so good, but is so complicated to eat it'll take your mind off of anything! :D)

Sorry, darling, when will you hear back from your RE for further instructions, dearest?

********babydust*********

Oh my goodness, Princess, on the contrary you know just what to say! You keep me laughing all the time and I just love you for that. Maybe I should suggest a lobster dinner to DH... it'd be intersting to see how that would go over... hahaha :D And I LOVE lobster... DH always laughs at me cause I tear that crustacian apart to ensure I get every last bit of yummy meat... def not me at my most femanine ;)

Holly, hope your meeting is going well. Just so you know, I am already feeling much better (physically and emotionally). But of course I'm still anxious for my NP to call and tell me everything still looks good. I'll let you know what I find out.

LOL, Kari, now you have me laughing so hard!! :D Picturing you (as best I can ;)) tearing into the lobster...and the "not me at my most feminine" LOL. That got me cracking up so hard!!!! :D:D:D:D

I'm glad I said something good-- I was really worried that I said something stupid or bumbling oaf-ish. :p

Enjoy the rest of your week and have a restful, relaxing weekend!

********babydust**********

Kari, I'm glad that you're feeling better both physically & emotionally. I hope that you're still going to take it easy & stay hydrated. I can't wait for your NP to call w/ your e2 levels already!!! I'm on the edge of my seat! I hope it is a good sign that so far there has been no mention of cancelling the cycle. You have really got some SUPER powerful ovaries! ;) Well, just know that we are all behind you 100%, hoping and praying that nothing will go wrong and you will be able to proceed w/ e/r AND e/t. I know if there is any way it is possible, your dr WILL make it happen. :angel:

Holly

Well I just got the call (finally!) from my NP. She said that everything is just fine and I will almost for sure trigger tomorrow and E/R on Mon. In fact she already has set up the appt for the anasteisiologist (sp?) for Mon morning. She did not tell me my E2 nor did I ask (I am def doing better not knowing the details :) ). But she didn't express any concern at all in her voice so I feel pretty good about it. They had me down to only 25 units of follistim this morning and I'll take a little more tonite, but none tomorrow morning before my u/s.

Holly, I will continue to take it easy you don't have to worry about that. My evening will be spent on my couch with my dog watching tv and reading. How's that for a Friday nite!!! ;)

Thank you guys so much for being there for me through this. I don't know how I could do it without you all, I really really don't. Hugs and Love,

Kari

Woohoo, thats a relief, I bet.:)
Good luck tomorrow, finally you made it to trigger :blob_fire :blob_fire :blob_fire
BFP just 2 weeks away.....
Babydust,
Mady

Oh Kari,
I have a feeling that everything is going to be OK this time. Good luck with your trigger tomorrow!
Baby dust

Luba

Hi Kari

Poor darling, I'm glad you're feeling a bit better now. Your Friday night on the couch sounds divine (I am jelous) and I think it will do you a world of good.
Good luck with your trigger tomorrow and e/r on Monday - you are so close now sweetie!

Thinking of you and sending gentle hugs.

Ruby

Luba, thank you for your kind words. I know it hasn't been the best of days for you, but believe me, your kind heart will be warmed with a baby of your own sooner than you know. :angel:

Mady, I AM relieved! I know I still have to get through one more u/s tomorrow morning, but I guess I have successfully made it this far and I think it's okay to start getting a little excited. I REALLY can't wait to join you in the 2WW. But hey, your beta is Monday, isn't it???? Your BFP will be here in no time!

Ruby, I think the time is getting close for the both of us. :) And maybe in about 8 months you'll have yourself a nice big belly and your family will have to pamper you while you relax on the couch until your baby is born! Enjoy your weekend over beyond the seas, and I look forward to sharing some E/R details on Monday.

Kari, sweetie I am so glad you are starting to feel better. I just logged on and read through the thread. I also felt pretty sick last Friday and thats when my RE gave us the OHHS talk, but he coasted me and I made it to ER and ET just like you will :) If there was any concern then I am sure your NP would tell you. I am so excited you are triggering tomorrow and can't wait to hear how many eggs you get. You must have some very powerful ovaries:angel: ........just hang in there and soon enough you will be bored on bedrest letting those embies snuggle in. :D
I really hope you take it easy tonight and have a peaceful weekend. You will be in my thoughts all day Monday as we wait for your egg report :)AimeeM

Hi Kari

You have such a nice way with words, your posts always make me smile! I hope you have a lovely weekend too and good luck with your u/s tomorrow - you know I'll be keeping you in my thoughts.

Big hugs!

Ruby

Aimee, wow I didn't realize you were also given the talk, but I did just read on your thread that you've had some mild symptoms since trigger. I hope that you are feeling better, and really I would love any suggestions to fight it off that seem to work best for you. Most importantly, I pray that we are talking about your BFP ten days from now! I'm very excited for you too!

Ruby, thanks for the big hugs and good luck wishes... they must have worked as I did get good news at my u/s today. Left the details in the IVF thread, but the jist of it is that I will be triggering tonite! Woo-Hoo!!!!! :angel:

Kari, I'm so excited for you!!!! FINALLY, after all you have been through, you've made it to e/r. :D :D :D You must be getting so excited!! I just know all this hard work is going to pay off & you will be blessed with that beautiful bfp in 2 weeks. :angel:

Holly

Hi Kari

I just posted my congratulations to you on the IVF thread but wanted to respond here as well.
I am so happy for you, you deserve this so much and I can't wait to read about your BFP which I just know is coming in a couple of weeks!

Good, good luck honey, everything is going to be great!

Ruby