My one year old daughter WILL not sleep in her playpen no matter what I do. From day one she was never a good sleeper. Always wakes up during the night. If she sleeps though it, I get up every hour checking on her wondering what's wrong. Any time I have ever tried to put her in the crib/playpen for either her nap or bedtime, it usually ends up a screaming episode...this can last a long time. I always have to rock her to sleep and most times if she is out cold I can put her in with no problems but usually she will wake up two hours later crying and wants to be held and sleep with us. For the two months that we were on holidays(waiting for our new house to be completed) she would sleep in the playpen at my parent's place for about a week. I would have to get up once or twice during the night, rock her to sleep for five minutes and then put her back with no problem. . Now, it's totally different. I don't know what to do. The other day I tried putting her in the playpen for her afternoon nap while she was awake and she screamed and cried till her little face was red. I will let her cry for about ten minutes then I can't take it no more and go get her. I have gotten so frustrated during the nights that I would bring her into bed with us and the minute she is with us, she falls asleep. Needless to say, she has slept with us alot lately. I'm not sure if she is scared of the playpen or has some sort of seperation anxiety but I am going crazy. They dayhome lady that will be looking after her when I go back to work full time, will be putting her in a playpen for her naps so I am desperately trying to get her into this routine. When she does sleep in our bed, I get NO sleep. What do I do?...any suggestions???

The problem is that she is gotten used to you putting her to sleep by rocking. Everyone wakes some time in the night, but we roll over and go back to sleep. Babies look to fall back to sleep the same way they went to sleep in the first place. So if you've rocked her, she'll look to be rocked to go back to sleep.

It's going to be hard, but you need to be firm and consistent. You need to allow her to fall asleep on her own. That way when she does wake up she'll know how to go back on her own without crying for you. Giving in and taking her to your bed only helps for a little while, but you never really solve the problem. And I'm like you, I CANNOT sleep with one of our children in the bed. I would be miserable the next day.

You have to do a nightly routine of bath, pjs, brush teeth, books etc. Keep the lights low to signal it's time for bed. Turn off the lights and it's okay to rock her, but just not to full sleep. Make sure she is drowsy, but definitely still awake. Lay her down and walk out of the room. She will scream, as you know. You can go back in and reassure her, but leave quickly, and you can't pick her up. Just rub her back and shhhhh, but then leave. Increase the time you go back. It will be awful for a few nights, but she needs to learn to fall asleep on her own. Before you know it, she'll cry and stop before you even leave the room, or possibly not make a peep! Like I said, it's going to be tough, but in the end it'll be a great gift to her and you!