I have been married for 26 years to my husband and I was just diagnoised with herpes and was told that we can't point the finger-that it leither one of us could be the carrier and not even know we had it. How do we resuem a normal sexual relationship with oral sex and all?

Does your husband have it too? If so, then I would not worry about anything. If you both have it you can't reinfect eachother. If you both have genital HVS2 the chances of transfering it orally when you don't have OB is VERY small...and even if you do get it, so what??!!! You can take valtrex and it will go a way in a couple of days. Really the chance (and consequence) is so small it's not worth worrying about and you both could have had it all along and never worried about it before.

My husband and I both have G HVS2 and have perfectly normal and active sex life after 21 years. (He had it all along....I got it latter)

Why, After 26 Years Of Marriage And I Now Have Herpes And Wentto The Dr. And First Was Told It Was A Yeast Infection But Then A Week Later Things Didn't Improve And Was Told It Is Herpes--and Why After All These Years, Did I Not Ever Experience Any Symptoms?

My Husband And I Have Had A Great Sex Life For The 26 Years We Have Been Married-oral Sex And All And I Am Concerned Will This Change Things For Us? Also, Since I Am The Only One Of The Two Of Us That Are Experiencing An Outbreak-should He Also Have To Take Medication To Avoid An Outbreak?

Go get yourself a blood test to see if you've been packing the herpes virus around for a long while. If this is your first occurrence with the virus then your blood will show negative.

I'd scoot mr. husband into the doctor too for a blood draw and test. He might of been carrying it around for ever and you're just now catching up with it.

You dont have to show signs to have it! And you dont have to show signs to spread it.

good luck

Since I Have The Outbreak Am I The Only One That Should Medicate Or Should He Also?

I Want To Resume To A Normal Sex Life But Can We Still Have Oral Sex IN OUR RELATIONSHIP?

What type (and where]) of herpes do you and your husband have? If you just got genital type 1, he has oral 1 already and he can't get it again. He could have had that for years with no symptoms and it really could have been domant which is why you are getting it now. It is also very possible you have oral type 1 already from kissing him and have no symptoms....and you may infect him genitally one day without knowing. If that happens, first OB might be bad but very infrequent and mild after that.

You really have to have the facts...who has what where.

IF it is the scenerio I suggest (type 1 all around) I would not let that inhibit my married sex life at all.

He should not medicate if he has no symptoms.

I agree.

The other thing to consider is this. You've been with this man for 26 years. Obviously this isn't going to change the way you feel about each other. I found that the hardest thing after I was diagnosed was having sex with my partner (same guy) the first time. But he was totally accepting. He was/is asymptomatic, so we don't know if he has genital or oral. But we know that he gave it to me genitally. Neither of us cared if it turned up on me orally, or on him in any way - it was about the intimacy that we wanted.

From the sounds of your relationship, I think that once you've figured out the facts and you've both processed the information a bit, this really isn't going to inhibit you at all.

I'd like to add, within a marriage, I would not let the fear of the inconvenience of a little itchyness now and then affect my sex life...it's worth it. Benefits outweigh the symptoms.