teresa2007
11-01-2007, 09:21 AM
Hello ladies!
My computer had a meltdown but i made it back
Anyways, im not sure if i seen anything on here concerning this except me of course lol
Do any of you get rages ? like you been going through your.
day ok and then something will happen to set you off and then your do or say something that your not proud or a shame of.
I have been under alot of stress lately but i did something a couple of days ago that is not me at all:(
I went to mcdonalds and got an iced coffee and it was horrible and i have gotton them before when they are horrible and they always fix them for me.
Well this one paticular manager shes not very nice anyways she wouldnt fix it or do anything and she was very rude so i turn around and went back and sit down but the more i got to thinking about it the more i got madder so i went up there and told her to stick it and threw it over the counter in front of alot of people and i walked out the door calmly. The next day i could not believe i did that. That is not me at all!!!!!! Its like something came over me and i freaked out and did it.
I mean i had every right to be upset but not to respond in that manner. Please tell me does anyone else do things like that and is it part of bp or is it just me? Please tell me im not going crazy? any help would be appreciated
Thanks Tee
SweetDeanie
11-01-2007, 09:28 AM
I find most of the time I'm quite controlled with my anger. I feel it of course and it feels way out of proportion to the trigger, but I use it to enable me to get results. I use it to make me more assertive when I need to be. Perhaps not at first but eventually with that build up you describe. I often find it hard to confront people when I should, it used to mean I bottled things up till I exploded. Now I allow myself to get mad, I tell myself how I have every right to feel upset and then I use it to confront people rather than bottle it up. I think having my kids helped me in this aspect, because we are less likely to accept things that make our kids suffer or lose out I think. I also did attend an assertiveness course which taught me how to talk to people in a manner that gets more results.
I think anyone who is getting anger issues would benefit from an assertiveness course because often anger comes from being unable to communicate how we are feeling, what we are thinking and a feeling of being out of control.
tsohl
11-01-2007, 11:04 AM
Hey Tee,
I bet the lady at McDonald's thought you'd already had too much coffee when she saw it coming across the counter at her :eek: :eek: :eek: !!!
Seriously though I think it is just another sign of the stress you are feeling and the fact that you do not have access to the meds that would help you with these feelings. These outbursts are signs of hypomania.
Also, SweetDeanie makes some good points. I know you feel people never listen to what you have to say. I know you keep things bottled up...and this was the last straw and you just kind of popped!!
Try not to worry about it. Hopefully you'll be able to get the right meds soon and then you will feel more in control.
In the meantime,watch that caffeine!! :rolleyes:
love ya,
xx Tsohl
LissasDream
11-01-2007, 12:31 PM
Tee,
I get the rage feeling a lot. It's scary...and at some point afterwards I end up crying and despairing.
When I was still in high school my senior year was the worst and I really started to deteriorate, there was an issue from home that somehow the school officials made their business and I leaped across the principal's desk and tried to two piece him in the mouth.
Things have all been downhill from there.
:blob_fire
always smiling
11-01-2007, 04:09 PM
I get rages, too.
One bad day I went driving through the Walmart parking lot and some woman called me a b**** because I accidentally blew through the stop sign. Well, I immediatley stopped the car and got out and started yelling at her. I ended up throwing a punch at her. Then I got in my car and sped home. I cried. I couldn't believe what I did.
The next day a cop showed up at my door. The lady filed assault charges against me!
Now I have that on my record. I also had to take Anger Management classes, a drivers course,pay a fine, and 40 hours community service. I was able to get out of that though, I wrote a letter to the judge explaining that I'm bipolar and I was getting too paranoid to do it. At least being bipolar helped me that time!
I just have to watch myself now. I'm really not a trouble maker or the tough type. I think I'm a sweet person. So yeah, I think it's definately a bipolar thing. It was a manic rage.
Something told me to stay home that night. I was actually looking for a fight, that's how I felt.
naturemomma816
11-01-2007, 05:35 PM
Wow, those are some great stories. I needed to laugh a lil'. I can just see the coffee flyin' and the brakes slammin". I get rages too. But I know people who aren't BP that do the same. Sometimes (no matter what our label) people just lose it. Especially at Mcdonalds and Wal-mart! Look around the next time your there, it happens all the time.
I agree with what SweetD said, a class would be good. If you don't have time for that, try a meditaion cd that you can listen to in the car or at home. I listen sometimes in the car - I hate driving, I lose it! People can't drive and need to take a class for that! Vent, sorry. As I was saying, I find it very relaxing.
Don't be so hard on yourself, Love thy self and the rest will fall into place. ;)
Naturemomma
teresa2007
11-01-2007, 08:21 PM
Thank you ladies!
I needed a good laugh too! You all had some interesting points and it gave me alot to think about.
I think part of me was looking for something to be angry about b/c i say i feel like im a walking time bomb just waiting to blow up.
I do keep alot bottled up and try to hide who i am and when something like that happens i cant seem to control my actions and it is scary it really is.
It also got me to thinking about when i was younger, different things like that happen then too and i would respond like that too.
I have been feeling more high strung then usual and im sure that the cafffeine is adding fuel to the fire.
Well i might look into an anger management course im sure it wouldnt hurt:D
Thank you for your encouragement! I feel better now Hugs Tee