Hello.

I really need some help and advice about my nan, i'm 19 and having watched my nan deteriate over the past few years has been really hard v_v

The main problem me and my family are having with her is her lack of desire to eat. It's getting worse and worse day by day. She lives down the road from me and my parents with my grandad and he has said that some days she refuses to eat anything at all and others she'll only eat a little.
Today they have come round for dinner like they do most Sundays and my dad gave my nan a small portion of dinner, half of that she passed onto my grandad's plate and most of the other half she left, this is what happens every week :(

My parents and my grandad get really cross at her, it's obviously because they are so worried but i don't think that's the right thing to do. I've tried encouraging her, making her varying food but it doesn't work. She's quite a stubborn old lady and if she refuses to eat it because she "doesn't want it" then it's almost impossible convincing her otherwise.

The only thing she will eat is fruit... i know that's a good thing that she's eating lots of fruit but it's hardly providing her with the strength and nutrition a good meal will. It's causing so many arguements and worry, right now i can hear the raised voice of my grandad shouting at her that she won't eat, it's not helping her is it?

The only insite i've had into why is something she said a little while ago about having trouble swallowing, i don't know if this is an excuse or not, does anyone know about any health issues to do with swallowing in old age?
She said "when you get to my age you wont want to eat alot" that's fair enough but there's a difference between not eating alot and eating hardly anything.

How can we get her eating properly again? :confused:

PLEASE help

Thanks. XxX

I'm sorry to hear about the troubles you're having coaxing your nan to eat. The changes that come with old age are challenging enough; poor lady doesn't need everyone yelling at her at every meal... although you're absolutely right to be concerned. Good nutrition is vital for everyone, young and old.

Lack of appetite is a common problem of aging. The hint your nan gave about having swallowing difficulty is revealing. Think about it... If you couldn't swallow food easily, you'd be afraid of choking on it. Every bite of food would be a scary proposition.

Some things to consider: Does she take any medication with a side effect of dry mouth? Or perhaps does she have an undiagnosed/untreated condition known as Sjogren's syndrome? A dry mouth can't produce enough saliva to enable easing swallowing.
Sometimes, a neck/spinal misalignment problem can cause swallowing trouble.
Dental problems or poorly fitting dentures won't allow proper chewing, making it a chore to eat.
Older people frequently don't smell as keenly as when they were younger, so whetting their appetites with the aroma of formerly favorite dishes is much harder to do.
She may get indigestion so frequently that she feels it isn't worth eating because of the discomfort.
There are remedies for all of these conditions, but she must see a doctor or speech pathologist to evaluate what the exact problem is.

Lastly, you must consider mental depression whenever there is a lack of appetite. There's an old saying that says "Old age isn't for sissies". It's hard! Physically and mentally. Does your nan otherwise seem blue... less cheery than she has been in the past? Does she ever express the fact that she feels her life is useless? Is she more irritable than ever (besides when she's being given orders to eat, which would make anyone angry)? There is help for depression, too.

Please urge her to see her doctor. If she doesn't want to, make clear to her how much you love her and want her to have a fulfilling long life.
Good luck to you all!