Recently my girlfriend broke up with me, it was a unpleasant break up, she broke off all contact with me and afterwards I did and said some things I'm not proud of.

Worse still it'll be Christmas soon, everyone will be happy except me, I'm likely to have a miserable Christmas and new years now. :(

I've been incredibly depressed since losing her, I feel like I have nothing to live for anymore. :(

Every waking moment I think of her and what I could have done differently in our relationship to avoid what eventually happened.

Does anyone else have any experiences of this? What can I do to get through this?

Jonathan

Well, I think most of us have been where you are at one time or another in our lives. And of course its extremely painful and depressing.....
Its a bad time of year to break up, but there really is no "good time".
You will get through this though, you just need time to heal and grieve the loss of what you thought might be.
There are never any guarantees that a relationship will last- its just part of life.
You can't place your self in the position that with out someone you can't exist, that bad for you and to much pressure of them.
Try working on your self now, and on trying to be a independent person.
You will see the light at the end of the tunnel:) and feel better when you are ready too:)

Thank you for your kind words and advice.

I hope I can get through this, I really do, but it's going to be so hard for me. :-(

She was my first love, I didn't find a girlfriend until I was 26 due to my depression and social anxiety and I fear now that I've lost her I'll never experience that kind of love again. She made me so very happy during our time together, happier than I've ever been, now I fear I'll never experience that kind of happiness ever again.

Life now seems utterly pointless to me, things I once found interest in I don't care about anymore at all, my life revolves around her, everything else is meaningless.

Because of my social anxiety I have no friends that can comfort me and help me through this, I'm on my own.

I hate myself and I fear no other woman would ever want to be with me, my future looks bleak.

I have been in your shoes and I know how difficult it is. A few years ago my bf broke up with me and I was devestated. But, now I realize that it needed to happen because I was incapable of standing on my own. The breakup forced me to do so. I had to find the strength to pick myself up and get it together. It was very hard, and I did have the support of some good friends, which you mentioned you don't have. Maybe now is the time to change the things you don't like about yourself and your life. Do you like your job? Where you live? The people around you? You just have to believe that anything is possible and that you have the power to change things for yourself.

After the breakup, I went to a therapist. I expressed my fears that I will never find love again, that by believing this I was just being 'realistic'. She pointed out that maybe what I thought was being realistic was actually being negative. For some reason, that simple sentence hit home for me. I never forgot it. So now when I start saying that things are bad, or are going to be bad, or I'll never be this or that, I remember her and try my best to think that things will turn out okay no matter what.

Maybe if you keep posting here about how you want things to get better we can help you make those changes? Hang in there.

i too broke up with my gf of 2 years...especially that i've spent 2 xmas with her...my family is all gone to guatemala for the holidays so i'm here alone... but you know What...the way I see it is i'm kind of at a reset mode. Soon as the newyear comes in i'll try to live a better, positive, healthier life. Dont worry you wont be the only lonesome one this year....
SINGLES UNITE>...:jester:

I have also been in your shoes. My bf broke up with me a year ago and I am still trying to get over him. I think it happened for the same reason that bulletproof said "I was incapable of standing on my own. The breakup forced me to do so. I had to find the strength to pick myself up and get it together." It is still very hard but I am now finding strength inside myself that seems to come out of nowhere. I had a lot of friends but realized that they were not true friends thus leaving me alone to deal with these issues by myself(which almost cost me my life on a couple of occasions)....

Same thing here, it is x-mas and I am spending it by myself. No family, no friends, no ex. The worse part about it is he is spending it with his ex girlfriend. That tears my heart to pieces....

anyways i hope you find your strength but not at the expense that it almost cost me.

My music life---yes! Singles unite! Thats refreshing cause here I am typing this at 3:40 am Christmas morning..alone in my apt with my cat.. Merry Christmas to all the singles..you are not alone..I try and think its just another day so I don't have some horrible christmas break down by myself..oneday I hope to have a christmas with a great husband and some babies and a family; a real family that I've never had..until then it is what it is...but it is refreshing to know I'm not alone; you're not alone..there are several of us depressed people spread about alone for the holidays, but soon they will be over and I think it will be a lift for all of us.;)

Thank you all for your understanding and support, break ups can be very traumatic experiences but talking about them with others who've shared that experience does make it easier to cope with, thank you.

An update on my situation.

Myself and my ex, after our unpleasant parting, have agreed to have some time apart before we see whether we can ever be friends again.

Thank you for your help and understanding, I hope you all find that special person you're looking for to make you complete. :)