I was in the gulf in 93-94.I served from 92-97, when I was discharged for Undiferensiated Somataform Disorder. Meaning I was sick but they couldnt find anything wrong, so they told me it was in my head.
I was diagnosed with sevier clinical depression a year later, but the list goes on.

When I found the list of symtoms I was devestated, the list coencides with the alot of the stuff I've been dealing with. A while ago when I realized what GWS was I thought I was there too late to get it. I was, wasn't I? There have been things going wrong with me that I cant exsplain, and niether can they.

I'm going to be a father in June, and if I'm fuct so be it, but I'm afraid now - afraid for my baby, and my wife.

I dont want to say I have it, I wouldnt feel right if I did, but form the list I read last night - I 'm not sure what to think, or what to feel..I'm really freak'n out.

Go figure though, my father was exsposed to agent orange.

I pray this isn't a trend for American history.

*****Email is welcome.*****
prym@adelphia.net

Hang in there! You are not alone, but you're right - it's scary. I served 87-93, was in the Gulf in 89, then again in 92. And I didn't get there until the worst was long over, so never even considered it. Until I started falling apart, mentally/physically.
I ran across a list of symptoms, and realized at least half fit my problems. Talk about an eye opener. I've been to no less than 5 different family doctors, an not a one could find anything. It sucks!!! I'm not one who gets a runny nose and runs down to the doctor. I pretty much have to be squirtin' blood out of a major artery before I'll go. But the aches and pains, they start to really get to you after a while. And all my damn teeth fall out in a span of a year? Come on, what's goin' on??? Back aches from hell, but it's just muscular they say. Yeah, okay, too bad NOTHING helps! And the mental side of it, the depression and all that, it's embarassing to even admit. But it's too bad to hide, and it's worse than the physical problems. I'd love to say GWS doesn't apply to me, but my aching mind and body is saying otherwise. Frustrated doesn't even begin to describe how I feel. Hang in there, I have a pretty good idea of how ya feel. And it sucks. And I really don't know what to think either, much like yourself.

AG3
I AM MARK I AM NOT NEW HERE I JUST COULD NOT REMEMBER MY PASSWORD.I HAVE READ YOUR POSTS
AND I SEE THAT YOU ARE NAVY.ME TOO I AM NAVY
AS WELL,I TRIED TO DROP YOU A LINE ON THE E-MAIL BUT MY COMPUTER FAILED.I HAVE BEEN SUFFERING WITH THIS FOR THE PAST TEN YEARS.I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO FIND MORE NAVY PEOPLE OUT THERE SO WHEN YOU HAVE TIME AND DROP ME A LINE AND WE WILL EXCHANGE INFO MY E-MAIL ADDRESS IS JULIO_2@USA.NET GOD BLESS


MARK A

MY NAME IS ROBERT HOLDGE AND I WAS WITH THE 101ST IN 90 AND 91 I HAVE BEEN SICK SINCE I CAME BACK STATESIDE ABOUT 3 DAYS EVERY SINCE THEN I HAVE SEVERAL DIFFERENT SIMPTOMS SUCH AS HEADACHES,CONSTANT JOINT ACHES AND DIZZENESS I ALSO HAVE A THREE YEAR OLD SON WHO HAS THE JOINT ACHES SO IT HURTS ME SO MUCH WHEN I KNOW HOW MUCH IT HURTS AND ALSO KNOW THAT I CANT DO ANYTHING FOR HIM SO I KEEP TRYING TO FIND A ANSWER TO THE MILLION DOLLAR QUESTION WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME AND WHAT WILL MAKE IT BETTER SO UNTILL I FIND THE ANSWER I WILL KEEP ON SERCHING SO I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL SO KEEP YOUR HEAD UP AND DONT LET IT GET YOU TO DOWN JUST REMEBER THAT THERE ARE ALOT OF PEOPLE THAT FEEL THE SAME WAY SINCERLY ROBERT HOLDGE
EMAIL ADDRESS

AG3, hope things have gone ok for you since this was posted. I completly identify with the scared thing, my kids are the ones that are sick. It's tough, I know, but there are WONDERFUL people out there for you to talk to. Robb is a most AWSOME person, and so is his wife. I am quite sure that he can talk to you better than I can, he knows alot, and knows more than I feel like I'll ever learn about this stuff. Use the support, and keep the faith. It's the only way we're all going to make it to the point of getting some answers. Hang in there. I'm a mom, so I have to ask, did you (your wife) have the baby yet? You said june, I pray that everything went Ok for you guys, or is going OK. GOOD LUCK!!! let us know if you can,

------------------

The baby (boy: Zachery 9lbs 13.6 ounces) seems healthy, but hes only 3 1/2 weeks old so far, although he is lactaing out of his left nipple ..???? The Docs say it fine and will go away, I hope so.

I am living, I was reasently diag with asthma, so the list goes on. BUT...
I am doing well (for me) I hope you all are doing the best that is possable, and thanks for all your suport.
My computer crashed and I lost the way here, but an email led me back (thanks btw, you know who you are.)

AG3, congrads!!! and boy was he big!!! Me, I had tiny ones, 6lb 3oz, 7lb 6oz, and 5lb 12oz. Yes, lactation in newborns is normal. it should stop soon if it hasn't already. It is just mom's hormones affecting the baby. I truely wish you and your family the best of luck, and congrads again,

------------------

It's great to find you guys! I was in the gulf for 9 mos. and was on board ship almost the entire 9 mos.! (That's a whole other syndrome!) I have gotten divorced, dropped out of college (twice!), job hopped all over the place, monster headaches, been diagnosed w/ both depression and ADD (been too embarrased to make known), severe muscle aches & cramps, recurring respiratory problems, etc, etc! In addition, since my divorce, I can't seem to make any relationships work, (mood swings, lack of focus, memory problems, and unexplainable lapses in judgement) I was engaged to be married earlier this month, but it fell apart, now I am basically homeless, and I just lost my job over having called in sick during the recent attacks! Aint life grand!? Please, anyone with any info, please feel free to drop me a line, we can keep in touch!

stephennellett@aol.com or sgnellett@mail.com

I just wanted to reassure you that one's service in the Gulf was never too late or too early to get sick. I believe that the majority of the illnesses we suffer are due to vaccinations/biological weapons.

Biological weapons were used early in the Iraq-Iran war. With the desert winds and desert conditions perfect for harboring bacteria-filled spores to survive and thrive, the weapons used during that war will affect everyone who treads across the desert sands for decades to come.

On top of that, if you received military vaccines even as late as 1993, your immune system was compromised before you even set foot in that massive wasteland called the Middle East.

You have reason to fear for your baby and your wife: I never made it to the Gulf. I got my vaccines shortly after Bush signed the presidential order allowing vaccines that had not been approved for public use by the FDA on Oct. 16. I received my vaccines on Nov. 21. I was so debilitated that I was confined to quarters within three weeks. I was medically boarded out of the Reserve a year after the ceasefire.

I met my husband a year later. Within a year-and-a-half, he too, was deathly ill. We both have spent a fortune on Infectious Diseases doctors, internists, antibiotics, antivirals, antifungals, antiparasitics, special diets, de-contaminating our home -- and yes, veterinarians, who are the only health professionals who fully understand Gulf War Illness.

Gulf War Illness is such a large umbrella of pathogens (manmade diseases) mixed with uncontrolled warfare exposure, that it's difficult to diagnose one victim's problems. But the veterinarians understand that most of the diseases the veterans have stem from animal diseases:
Mycoplasmal infections are normally associated with dogs and cats
Anthrax, brucella and brucellosis are normally associated with cattle
Leishmaniasis, once a Middle Eastern disease, was associated with people who served in Desert Storm. Now, there are areas of the country, New York and the Texas Coast/Valley, where the disease runs rampant
Q fever, once associated with service in Egypt and wetlands in the Mediterranean, now runs rampant in the New York/New Jersey/Washington, D.C. area

Yes, us veterans are walking typhoid Marys. The diseases we were injected with and ingested through our lungs, and even our skin, are transmissable by means of airborne, sweat (shared sheets, shared towels), saliva (inadequately sterilized dishes), not to mention sexually transmitted.

My best advice to you is to get on antibiotics of any kind for any possible reason you can give a medical physician, and see if you feel better within three to seven days. From there, you'll need to search the Internet exhaustively to cure the illness that will surely kill you, your wife, and your children, and your pets if you have them.

It's no joke. I've lived through the dreadful sickness, kicked most of it, and am alive today just to tell about it.

Hi AG3,

I know this is no constolation for all you have lost, and all you will loose to this, but, perceverence, and searching for an answer, can yeild some good benefits.

I served in Saudi, in the desert, durring the actual war.

My life ended, less than a year after returning home (I've also had a whole slew of symptoms, that devistated me), and a whole, dark aura just set down all around me. The worst of it lasted for four or five years.

I found that boosting my nutrition with high quality suppliments, was a good (though expensive) route for me to go...even if it is not a cure.

Today, I am far from perfectly healthy, but I am doing various things, that only a year ago I thought would be nearly impossible.

For one, I've held a job (though part time) for nearly a year, which is the longest I've ever been employed, in my entire life (with exception to my six years in the National Guard). I was young, and in college when called to war, so I didn't have any long history of working jobs. After the war, it was impossible for me to hold down a regular job.

I don't get out much, but I am finally starting to experience a renewed interest in life, and have even taken up learning to play a musical instrument (which is somthing I wanted to do, from my earlier years).

I strongly advocate throwing youself into activities that bring you joy, and uplift. I know it's difficult (and somtimes impossible) to maintain interests, while having this, though...but, loosing interest in life, is hitting the bottom (I've been there), and it's far better to try staying focused on the positive...Don't let yourself stagnate with this.

My life may be pathetic by some peoples standards, but from a personal standpoint, I am breaking through the shell, and making victorious strides forward, despite the illness.

The symptoms are still there, to some extent...I don't think they will ever leave...but, they will control me no longer.

There is life after GWS.


[This message has been edited by Steve Knight (edited 09-23-2001).]