kellogg
01-01-2008, 09:05 PM
I had the New Year's Eve I've always wished for last night...dinner at home with the man I love, movies, champagne...you get the picture. The whole time I was having obsessive thoughts like, "if he's ever lied to you then none of this is real." My obsessions are around the fear that he has lied to me about things (from very trivial to important) and it sucks! I have no reason to have this belief as there have not been any incidents. Possibly this fear stems from the fact that I've dated a bunch of liars and cheaters in the past and I don't want that to happen again (for obvious reasons). Does this thought, "if he's lied then this isn't real" sound like OCD? Can anyone relate?
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ineedhelpasap21
01-01-2008, 09:12 PM
YEEEEAH. this happens to me. i lied to my family about something (as i was talking about in previous posts) and my ocd suddenly spiked up this month. Well all weekend i was out with all of my friends home from college and we were all drinking champagne and the whole time i was thinking "im a liar, i lie to my family..i dont deserve to be happy..id rather be anyone else in this room." so devestating.
BadMalibu
01-01-2008, 09:45 PM
Kellogg-
Alot of people here call OCD the "doubting" disease, but sometimes I like to call it the "sabotaging" disease because OCD always uses times when were happy to try to sabotage our own happiness. When were happy we don't think about the times we were miserable or the mistakes we've made in life, but our OCD wants us to remember these times so we don't make the same mistakes twice, so it tries to scare us out of what makes us happy with all these ridiculous thoughts.
You kind of have the answer to your own question:
Possibly this fear stems from the fact that I've dated a bunch of liars and cheaters in the past and I don't want that to happen again (for obvious reasons).
I would say that it's a good possiblity that from your past relationships you have trouble trusting other men and you're afraid that if you let your guard down, you'll wind up with a liar and a cheater again.
This is where trusting ourselves is so important, because if we trust ourselves to make the right decisions about life and about a mate, we don't have to be filled with anxiety about the decision to be with someone.:D
Alot of people here call OCD the "doubting" disease, but sometimes I like to call it the "sabotaging" disease because OCD always uses times when were happy to try to sabotage our own happiness. When were happy we don't think about the times we were miserable or the mistakes we've made in life, but our OCD wants us to remember these times so we don't make the same mistakes twice, so it tries to scare us out of what makes us happy with all these ridiculous thoughts.
You kind of have the answer to your own question:
Possibly this fear stems from the fact that I've dated a bunch of liars and cheaters in the past and I don't want that to happen again (for obvious reasons).
I would say that it's a good possiblity that from your past relationships you have trouble trusting other men and you're afraid that if you let your guard down, you'll wind up with a liar and a cheater again.
This is where trusting ourselves is so important, because if we trust ourselves to make the right decisions about life and about a mate, we don't have to be filled with anxiety about the decision to be with someone.:D
dksea
01-02-2008, 12:17 AM
"what if" "what if" its like the OCD theme song, what if this, what if that, no matter how illogical it sounds we just can't shake those thoughts that get stuck in our mind. For each of us its different things, but what you are describing is pretty much OCD sounding to me.
The best thing you can do is to stop trying to debate/argue with yourself about your worries. Ok, easier said than done :) But really thats what you will work on if you go through Cognative/Behavioral therapy. Just try and note that you are having the thought, note that its your OCD, and thats it. Just go onwith whatever you are doing, dwelling on your thought, trying to out logic your thought, it only keeps that thought on your mind (ironic isn't it).
If you can talk to a therapist or psychiatrist who specializes in anxiety/OCD disorders so you can get treatment to help you manage your OCD. Trust me it can get aLOT better.
The best thing you can do is to stop trying to debate/argue with yourself about your worries. Ok, easier said than done :) But really thats what you will work on if you go through Cognative/Behavioral therapy. Just try and note that you are having the thought, note that its your OCD, and thats it. Just go onwith whatever you are doing, dwelling on your thought, trying to out logic your thought, it only keeps that thought on your mind (ironic isn't it).
If you can talk to a therapist or psychiatrist who specializes in anxiety/OCD disorders so you can get treatment to help you manage your OCD. Trust me it can get aLOT better.