Hello,

Long post but I wanted to speak about this to someone.

I woke up one morning 2 weeks ago and my heart was beating noticeably irregularly and fast at ~130 bpm. I was extremely anxious and thought I was going to die. I went to the ER and they diagnosed it as "afib" from the ekg. They gave me an iv dose of diltiazim and my heartrate returned to a regular pattern almost immediatly. They took blood and checked for some thyroid markers, sugar and such and sent me on my way.

I was in the ER again 2 times within the next 4 days because my heartrate was going up unexplainably. I'd be sitting in bed trying to rest and it would go up to 120. When I got to the ER it would be around 90 constantly. I tried to tell them my normal resting rate is 60-65 but they said it was probably just anxiety. My bp was around 140/100 and normally it is 120/80.

I have a semi-stressed job and was probably taking too much caffeine (~80-100 oz. diet soda and a couple excedrin migraine every day). A bit overweight but I ate well...wasn't in great aerobic health but I don't smoke, drink or do drugs either so I have been extremely worried it is a structural defect or another serious issue with my heart. I quit all caffeine cold turkey after the first ER trip so that may have been giving me the terrible headaches I was getting until a few days ago but there are too many variables.

I met with a cardiologist and he gave me a semi-quick exam and said I was fine but scheduled me for cholesterol, stress-echo, and echo tests. All the tests came back within normal parameters. Urine test came back normal at my primary care doctor, whom I saw about all the gi pain I was having as a result of being too stressed to eat much of anything through this ordeal.

This leads to now. I haven't been able to sleep well in 3 days. I almost fear going to bed now and I think it's because that's where I had this episode. This heart condition is taking up the majority of my thoughts through the daytime. At night I find that I can actually feel my pulse without taking it while laying in bed. This makes me think about it and keeps me up longer. I find myself waking up scared and my heart is up a bit.

I've never been the kind of person to outwardly show nervousness or much of any emotion and would never have thought of going to the ER before unless I thought I was in serious trouble. All the doctors I've seen say I'm fine but I can't stop thinking about it. One of the ER doctors gave me some xanax, which worked but I stopped taking it as I don't want to have to forever rely on a drug to sleep well. The cardiologist said I might want betablockers as I looked like a "worryer". I don't want to have to take those either as I know they will have some side effects.

I just want to be able to sleep well and function normally again. Does anyone have some tips for this anxiety? I was thinking about taking a melatonin or something. I started exercising again and while my heart rate was OK during it, I felt a little light headed and weak after 30 minutes of it which may or may not be due to my out-of-shapedness.

It sounds like anxiety. You've worked yourself up into having a big fear around this heart thing. I've had lots of anxiety attacks and a pulse rate of 130 isn't uncommon in a time of high anxiety. If you've been checked out by a cardiologist and had all those bloods done then you've got to believe the doctors. Anxiety about going to bed because that's where it happened is 'cued' anxiety. It's normal but you've got to work through it. Perhaps taking the xanax in the short term, in conjunction with a bit of 'self talk' (reminding yourself that you've had tests and they've come out okay and you're anxious...) might help. If you keep feeling really anxious maybe you'd better get a referral to a psychologist who can go through some cognitive behavioural therapy techniques to help you get over the cued anxiety. I had a friend who had a heart attack and he had angioplasty and was fine and everything but afterwards he kept having anxiety attacks and he thought they were heart attacks and had to go and see someone to help him through the anxiety. I guess it was like a form of post traumatic stress disorder. The mind is a very powerful thing, more than capable of sending your heart rate up with a huge shot of adrenaline if you're having stressful, heart-related thoughts. Lots of people with anxiety take betablockers but give it a bit of time, the fear should wear off after a while. If it doesn't get a referral.