Hi Ladybug,

I am so sorry it has taken me days to post, please forgive me, I promise I'll be a better spiney friend :D in the future. This week has been so crazy for me in so many ways...I so wish we were neighbors, then you could just come over for coffee and chat, but I guess this message board is the next best thing...our fellow spineys are wonderful people that truly know how we feel everyday :angel:.

My son, little E, woke up last friday with the flu, despite getting his flu shot last fall, so friday was rough...and I had already planned his birthday party for saturday, I wanted to cancel b/c I didn't want my entire family to catch the flu bug but my mom convinced me otherwise...little E was also feeling better on saturday but they say hindsight is 20/20 for a reason...LOL...we had his party as scheduled and everything was fine until he threw up all over my hubby while we were eating cake...later that evening my hubby got the flu, I woke up sunday morning with it and by monday evening my entire family had caught the NASTY flu bug...we all agree that it's the worse flu we've ever had.

I put my first duragesic patch on saturday evening at 10pm and by 12:30 am I felt heavily sedated, so much so I had to go to bed. By sunday evening the flu symptoms had subsided and that's when I started to notice the side effects of the patch...from sunday evening to wednesday afternoon I was experiencing extreme weakness - when I would stand up I would feel like I was going to pass out, no energy to do even the simpliest things like get a glass of water, or even drink a glass of water, tiredness - I have never been so tired before, not even when my son was an infant, it was an odd tiredness, it was more of a drugged feeling, I couldn't stay awake, sick - I was so sick to my stomach, usually only when I was sitting or standing, I was fine as long as I was laying down, I couldn't eat either but I was very thirsty, I craved cold water so I drank a lot of it...I lost 8 pounds in 4 days...my mind was also a mess (it still is), the fentanyl from the patch made my mind mush, I couldn't begin to think of comprehending anything...it was weird...but every day I have felt a little better...I still have a hard time with eating and feeling sick but I'm working on it....the patch definately controls my back pain better than the oxy did so I have some hope for the future...up until today my pain level has been about a 5 on a pain scale of a 1-10 but today my pain has been about an 8 again...I change the patch every 3 days and today is day 3 so sometimes on day 3 my pain can increase b/c apparently the patch isn't as effective, alot of patients change their patches every 48 hours instead of every 72 so when I see my dr on March 14th that may be something we discuss but I don't want to jump the gun, to be honest I can't imagine an increase at this point...I saw my dad last week, and I haven't seen him since Christmas, he told me I was wasting away into nothing...he's right, I'm losing way too much weight...Tuesday night I hadn't really ate anything except some applesauce since Saturday and I couldn't force myself to eat anything mainly b/c I didn't feel good and also b/c I never have an appetite, my husband got really angry at me and told me I had to eat or I would end up in the hospital...I knew he was right and I didn't want that to happen so I choked down some saltines...since then I have made an effort to eat something everyday, the good thing is I have been drinking a lot of water and ice so I'm hydrated. It has been a big adjustment, let me tell you.

I did want to tell you that the neurosurgeon I saw last Monday now seems to think that there's a piece of the bulging disc at L1 floating around in my lumbar area...which would mean the disc is no longer bulging, right? Wouldn't that mean it's ruptured? That may explain my pain. I'm still not letting him do the fusion if he insists on taking me off pain meds beforehand, and there is no way I will ever change my mind, in fact, this lets me know how stingy he would be after surgery with pain meds...nope...if I've learned anything from this journey, it's to be wise. However, I am wise enough to know that I need to find a neuro or ortho surgeon to fix my back in the near future before my back problems/pain gets too out of my control...hence my next issue...
I also learned another great piece of info late this week. I have been trying, very professionally trying to obtain a copy of my records from my first neurosurgeon, b/c without those records no other surgeon is going to be willing to do further surgeries on my back. The last letter I sent his office was sent by certified mail and my records show his office received my letter on Jan 30th but as of this past Monday I had not heard back from them or received my records, so I called his office yesterday. Guess what? His assistant is now telling me they lost my file. She told me she would call me once she found my file. These people have made up every excuse under the sun not to give me my records, but they must be getting scared b/c another surgeon just requested them. I find it extremely hard to believe they lost my file...I don't understand why they are trying to keep what is legally mine from me. This neuro won't fix my back, even though he knows I need more surgery, but his assistant won't give me my file so another surgeon can fix it for me....I don't understand...there was never any problems between me and my surgeon...I don't care for his nurse or his administrative assistant but I have been professional with them even though they haven't always been the same to me...in my last letter I threw in how I would like a copy of my records as my neuro is legally obligated per HIPAA to send me a copy...this doesn't seem to matter to my neuro, which is surprising b/c he is professional and so is the group he works for...do you have any suggestions? The bottom line is I need my records before another surgeon will agree to attempt to fix my back through surgery.

What has been going on in your life Ladybug? I feel like I've been asleep for a week and need to catch up on everything. I know in one of the post I read a few days ago you mentioned a bad spell you were going through, tell me about that...and how the heck do you do it without pain meds? In so many ways I admire you for that, even though it's not your choice at this point, but at the same time I know how tough it has to also be for you. You are in my thoughts and prayers and have been all week, even when I couldn't think straight to let you know it...lol. I can't wait to hear back from you :). I've missed you!

Please disregard any misspelled words or crazy sentences, my brain is still on the mushy side :dizzy:

Take care,
Scrappin'

Hey Scrappi,

Am so glad to hear that you are on your way to getting better. Sounds like you have been through a major ordeal!! Dont worry about not being in touch for so long...I completely understand!! I have missed you too..and I knew that something had to be wrong since I hadnt heard from you in a few days!!!! But even though the patches made you so sick, Im glad to hear that they are working for you pain wise. Im not sure that I would have stuck in there long enough to find out if they had made me that sick. I need to lose some weight..but I certainly dont wanna lose it that way!! haha.

Wouldnt it be something if we really are "neighbors"..lol. I dont think we have ever asked each other where we are from..So here goes...where are you from? Im in NC. LOL.

I hate to hear about Little E's birthday...but at least he got to enjoy some of it anyway. Poor guy! Yeah, I know several thats had the flu this year...and it hit everyone of them very hard!! Just keeping our fingers crossed that we survive yet another year without getting it!

As far as the bulging/rupture...that is my situation..its still bulging out, and it did rupture...so no, just because it has ruptured, doesnt mean that its still not bulging out. And those pieces floating, I would assume that it does mean that it ruptured....not sure how much..could be just a little bit. In the May MRI that I had done last year, it showed the floating material..and they said that it was definitely ruptured...but mildly ruptured..and according to my recent MRI, its still bulging. So that should answer your question. I dont blame you about coming off the pain meds before the fusion..but...if its gonna make it worse on you in the end when trying to control the pain after surgery .I really dont know what I would do. I cant believe that drs office lost your file!!! OH MY!! Id be ticked!!!!! But it certainly does sound suspicious!! Wonder if they really did lose your file?? I have no idea what to tell you how to handle that one! I think if it were me, Id be telling them that if you do not have it in your hands within a certain number of days, that you will see what your attorney can do about it....(even if you dont have one..they dont know that!!) thats the only thing I would know to tell you. Is it possible that you could get some kind of records from the hospital where the surgery was performed?? They should have something pertaining to your surgery in their medical records office. Thats one thing I would check on first thing Monday morning.

As far as me....I go through those spells every so often. It seems to be happening more and more here lately though. I can tolerate the leg pain (nerve) and the burning...but I CANNOT tolerate that horrible toothache feeling pain. When it gets like that...sorry...but I aint tough no more..LOL...I HAVE to rely on my pain meds...Ive taken more of them over the last couple of weeks than I have in the last year. I dont really consider them pain pills....as they dont really help. It makes me more groggy and out of it than anything...but it does help a touch with the pain. Im hoping my new dr can give me something better than those darn things for times when it gets that bad. (oh yeah...I forgot to tell you...my rx account as been reactivated a couple of weeks ago..lol). So I was able to get my refill on the joke of a pain pill that I have.

Well, I look forward to hearing from you again. Just hope that you will be completely back to "normal" again. Take care and I look forward to hearing from you!

Hi Ladybug :),

How are you feeling today? Today I feel great, which surprises me b/c today is day 3 on my current patch and usually on day 3 I experience some nausea and pain b/c the fentanyl in the patch is no longer at its peak, it's on a downward spiral, meaning I can experience mild withdrawal symptoms. At my next appt, not until 03.14.08, I plan to ask my doctor about applying a new patch every 48 hrs instead of every 72 hrs. I have learned alot about how the patch works from the chronic pain veterans over on the PM board..they have been patient and answered all of my questions...there are some wonderful people over there...I don't know what I would have done without their help. I am getting use to the patch...every day is a better day, in fact yesterday I did not experience any nausea whatsoever...it was a nice day...LOL...unfortunately today I had 1 small nausea episode, but 1 episode is nothing compared to what I went through last week! My doctor is still prescribing for me 3 percocet a day for breakthrough pain, when I was still on oxy I would take pecocet to take the edge off my severe pain, now when I take a percocet it actually takes most of my pain away...it's so nice to have my pain under control most of the time...I had gone so long without my pain being properly controlled that I think I forgot what it feels like to not be in severe pain all the time...Ladybug, it's wonderful and I know you'll find out for yourself very soon, I just know it!

How did you get your RX account reactivated? What pain med are you taking? I'm glad you have something to take, something has to be better than nothing. Your pain must be bad if you're using them, I know all about your crazy high pain tolerance....I also know what you mean when you say the pills make you groggy and feel out of it but don't touch your pain...that sounds so familiar to me. I can't wait until you see your neuro on the 17th, you do still have the same appt, right? I'm still praying he's a great doctor - a great surgeon w/a great bedside manner.

I knew you had to be southern...I could tell by the way you word things...lol, have you always lived in NC? Is it warm there? I bet you have a tan all year round. I live in Ohio...the weather is never predictable here, 1 day it can be 60 degrees and the next it's in the 20's and snowing. Considering how big the United States is, we aren't that far apart, maybe when it gets warmer outside, you can open a window and smell my coffee brewing...LOL.

I'm glad you and your family haven't caught the flu bug, I hope you don't...I wouldn't wish that on anyone...my grandparents live in Florida during the winter months (like every other elderly person) and they both caught the flu this year, my grandma said alot of old people have the flu down there this year.

I was sad little E was sick at his birthday party too but there was one moment from his party that will forever replay in my mind...first let me explain that E's not the type of child that is deliberately always trying to get your attention, he is instead more of a loner and a thinker...at his party, I will never forget the smile on his face when my husband was holding his Elmo cake in front of him with his birthday candle lite, and everyone was singing 'happy birthday' to him...it was such a priceless moment...you could tell he was in awe, he couldn't believe everyone had stopped what they were doing to sing to him...I may not be able to do many of the things with my son that other mothers can but I can make my son feel like he's the greatest little guy in the world, no matter how disabled I am...maybe God slowed me down on purpose, maybe so I wouldn't be one of these mothers that is too busy to pay attention to their child...I don't know...I'm still trying to figure the why part out. It still was a great party, even though everyone took home the flu bug...what a gift that was...luckily no one in the family is holding a grudge...LOL.

I think I've figured out how I'm going to go about getting MY records from my former neurosurgeon. I have a few more things to work out tomorrow before I'll bore you with the details, but if all goes well, I think I'll be able to prove his office never lost my file and I'll get my copy of it...I just would like to know why his office doesn't want me to see my records...it doesn't make sense...I'll update you tomorrow unless it turns out to be a flop, then I'll still tell you so we can get a good laugh about it.

I'm so glad I'm getting back to life as I know it. I missed chatting with you so much! Keep me updated.

Take care,
Scrappi

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Thank you

Hey Scrappi,

It is sooooo nice to hear that you are finally getting your pain under control. I know that just has to be the greatest feeling in the world!! Im sooo happy for you!!!! :D

Im doing fairly well. In the last few days since I last wrote you, I have only had to resort to taking pain meds once...which was last night.

Im not sure when they actually activated my rx account. My pharmacist called wanting to know if I wanted the Topomax (there was a mix up, and they had filled it again, and they were wondering why I hadnt picked it up, so while he was on the phone, I had him to check my rx account, and thats when I learned that it had been reactivated). I just had them to refill the tramadol with acetomenophin....thats all I have since I havent seen a dr to get something different. Yeah, my appt is still on the 17th. Its getting closer...cant wait..I think!! lol. Im still determined to avoid surgery...at least until they get me into some kind of intense therapy/exercise program to get my muscles/strength built back up.

Yeah Im a southern gal..lol. I was born and raised in NC and love it!! I used to stay out in the sun all day years ago...but I dont get into that anymore. LOL. I very rarely lay out in the sun. I will for a few days if we plan on a beach trip...but other than that..I could care less about being dark..lol. I cant tolerate the sun/heat like I could 20 years ago..lol. The weather is unpredictable at times here, but for the most part, its fairly stable during the seasons. We dont get alot of snow. Im kinda glad...I like the kind where its here today, gone tomorrow...and over the last few winters, thats pretty much what we get...if we get any at all! I like NC...we get the "good weather"..lol...not many tornadoes, rarely deal with hurricane storms (we do get the remnants at times though, but its mostly just rain), not much snow/ice problems, not many problems with extreme bitter cold. But it can get very hot and dry in the summer. Last year was our worst ever. We are still 14" below normal on rain. We rely on tropical systems for our rain in the summer....but we just didnt have any last year. I like that about opening the window and being able to smell your coffee!! LOL. That was cute. :D I have a good friend, as well as kin folks in Ohio...I havent been to Ohio in at least 25 years though.

Im so glad that little E enjoyed his party! You know...maybe you are right about God slowing us down. Before my dad died, I didnt get to spend much time with my girls with all the hospital/dr visits during the 5 years that he was sick.....I was sad and depressed for about a year after that...then I went to work a year after he passed....I just rarely got to see them. So now..I see them all the time!! So just maybe that was His plan!! I think Im gonna look at it like that and make that the bright side of all of this..haha.

well, I wish you luck on getting your medical records. let me know how it goes. but I guess I need to get off this computer and try to get some things done. talk to you later!!

Hey Ladybug :wave:,

How are you today? I'm good but my back and leg has ached all day...it has either rained or snowed here all day...just another typical winter day...I guess that's what we get in the middle of winter...lol. I was born and raised in Ohio and I'm sure I'll be here until the day I leave this earth and move up to Heaven :angel:...just think, in Heaven we'll have no more pain or limitations put on us by our failing bodies, won't that be wonderful? My mother, sister and I had a conversation not too long ago about death and the afterlife...my sister said she wants to be cremated when she dies, I personally think that's an odd choice...I told her I didn't want to be cremated just in case I need my body in the afterlife...my mom looked at me and said "with all the problems you've had b/c of your body, don't you want to request a new one once you get to Heaven?"...I said yes, I would love it if Jesus decides to bless me with a new body in Heaven, but just incase He doesn't I'm not going to let anyone burn up the one I lived in on earth, disabled or not...my mother and my sister got such a laugh out of my view on that...I think they're the silly ones.

Do you live on a farm? I guess for some reason I have always thought that b/c of different things you've said in past posts. When I was a kid, my parents use to take us to Myrtle Beach every summer for a week...we had so much fun during those vacations. I have a question and I'm going to warn you ahead of time that it's going to make you laugh, but I honestly don't know the answer...what are kin folks? You mentioned in your last post that you have some in Ohio.

Tramadol makes you groggy and feel out of it? What is the strongest narcotic you've ever taken? If you started taking what I'm on, heck, you'd be knocked out for a month...lol...it'd take a while for your body to get use to such stronge meds...you can certainly use that to your benefit though, especially if you find yourself resorting to surgery...the first month or so of your recovery, when you'll be in the most pain, you'll spend sleeping off the prescription meds...that won't be so terrible, but then again you do have an amazingly HIGH pain tolerance so you'll probably tell your neuro you don't need pain meds...lol...please don't tell him that, you never know when you might need them down the road. Speaking of post-op pain, I honestly didn't think post-op pain was all that bad, I did think it was easier to deal with than the pain I dealt with day-to-day prior to surgery, so if you do end up having surgery, don't let your neuro and his nurse scare you when they repeatedly explain to you how much pain you'll have post-op...I don't think they understand how much pain we've had to deal with pre-op for months and sometimes years...it's almost like they think our first option is surgery, instead of it being our last option.

I'm really beginning to think the reason I have back problems is b/c God wanted to slow me down too...it's the only thing that makes sense...I have sat and thought and thought and thought about why this happened to me at the greatest time in my life, I had just become a mother...my husband and I tried to have a baby for four years before we had Little E...I lost one baby - the baby didn't make it to term...the problem was me, I wasn't ovulating every month, I took meds to force ovulation but that takes all the fun out of making a baby so my husband and I decided to stop the meds shortly after starting them...we had actually stopped trying to get pregnant when we finally got pregnant with Little E...lol...wouldn't you know, and even then, I had a rough pregnancy, I had hypermesis, which means I was extremely sick my entire pregnancy, in and out of the hospital for IV fluids...nothing was easy about it...I had to quit my job by the time I was 6 weeks pregnant b/c I was so sick....I had planned to quit working after E was born, my plans just changed slightly...I can't help but think God allowed us to try to conceive for 4 years before actually being successful, He allowed me to be extremely sick the entire time I was pregnant, and then He allowed my back to basically fall apart after my son was born all to get us to slow down and enjoy Little E...who is the greatest little guy in the world. I would like to mention that since my back problems started, many other things in my life have also fallen apart...lol...but my husband and I have to laugh b/c sometimes there's nothing else to do...we do know that God knew what He was doing when He blessed us with Little E...He knew we would NEVER be able to get through all these valley's without that little guy, he makes us smile so many times a day, he makes it all worth it and sometimes I enjoy the "slowed down" pace, it's nice to sit back and watch Little E and not have another care in the world.

I'll tell you about the medical record fiasco tomorrow...I've blabbed way too much tonight...sorry if I've bored you :yawn:.

Take care,
Scrappin'

Hey Scrappi,

Im fairly good today. Kinda achy and stiff, but nothing I cant deal with. It rained here yesterday..too warm for snow. lol. But its gonna be kinda cold today and tomorrow...with temps around 40 with 25-30 mph winds.

I dont wanna be cremated either. But I never thought about your philosophy of it..lol. I like that!

We kinda live on a farm..lol. Its 16 acres of farm land. But its not being used for anything now. My hubby and his father used to grow 50+ acres of tobacco (on his dads land too)..of tobacco up until a few years ago when it phased out so bad, and no one could make any money off of it. Now our cash crop is sweet potatoes. We usually have about 2 acres of it. I used to help him...but now....I cant! My hubby grows about an acre of vegetables during the summer...but he gives most of it away...he just LOVES farming and growing things.

I just LOVE your question..LOL. Kin Folks = relatives...LOL. I have relatives in Cincinnati. And yes, I did get a laugh out of that one! :D


I guess the strongest narcotic I have ever taken is Percocet and Tylenol with Codeine. They make me groggy as well. With the Tramadol, Im supposed to take 1 every 8 hours...but thats like taking nothing at all...so I take 2 of them. As far as surgery pain..I dont let that scare me. Between the laparoscopies I had for endometriosis, Tonsillectomy, and hysterectomy...none of them were painful as everyone told me it would be. lol. In fact, hours after my hysterectomy, my dr asked me "are you SURE you had surgery today??!!"...I laughed and told him that I was beginning to wonder! That was with nothing more than Ibuprofen that they gave me every few hours, which I didnt even think I needed that! I was driving myself to the dentist one week later to get that darn tooth pulled that got infected...and they were AMAZED that I was out and about by myself..lol. I told them that the tooth pain was by far worse than having the hysterectomy!!

I hate to hear that you had a rough time getting pg..then a rough pregnancy when you finally did conceive. wow. But, I guess it was all worth it in the end, huh? Thankfully, both of my pregnancies were good....it was the delivery and after that got me. With my first, they gave me too much epidural..which made me sick and weak....to the point to where they told my hubby that if things didnt progress within a certain time frame...he was gonna have to make the decision as to whether to save me or the baby. With my second..things went great with delivery....BUT...3 weeks later I nearly died due to a severe infection from not having all of the afterbirth expelled from my body. Now that was rough!!

I cant wait to hear about your medical report ordeal. I'll be watchin and waitin for it....lol. Have a good day.

Hey Ladybug,

It's bright and white here today...yeah :cool:! Last night it snowed a few inches...I LOVE snow and I've turned my son into a snow lover too :bouncing:. You're probably stiff and achey b/c you have a back injury that needs medical attention and also b/c it's cold outside today :D...lol.

I actually feel pretty good today, probably b/c I'm only on day 2 of the patch. The worst side effect of the patch is constipation...everyone knows narcotics cause constipation...before I started using the patch I did know constipation was a more severe side effect of the patch than with other narcotics...when I was taking oxy I had to stay on top of my fiber intake but so far with the patch it doesn't seem to matter what I do, nothing has worked...everyday since last Tuesday I have taken stool softeners and so far I haven't had any BM's, I know from Tuesday to Friday I was still having a hard time eating but since Friday I've been eating okay, I've also been taking daily fiber supplements...I guess at my next appt I'll have to talk to my doctor and see if there's something she can prescribe...lol...if it's not 1 thing it's another.

Your former doctor prescribed 1 tramadol every 8 hours for a back injury? You can take more tylenol than that! Back in early December when my pain dramatically increased, my PM doctor refused to move up my monthly appt, he advised me to go to the urgent care/ER instead...so I did and ofcourse I got lucky enough to get stuck with the only doctor in the place that didn't "believe" in narcotics...she gave me a script for tramadol instead, but even she wrote it for 2 every 6 hours...my mother takes it for arthritis and when I told her that's what they gave me she laughed and said it should work about as well as tylenol does for me...lol...the urgent care doctor said she was prescribing it b/c she thought my back was inflammed and tramadol would help decrease that...I'm sure my back has been inflammed for years now and will be for years to come...lol.

My grandparents have always lived on a farm, my mother grew up on it...I loved going there as a kid and now Little E loves to visit...my grandparents grow their own veggies, my grandma's tomatoes are out of this world, she makes her own applesauce...yum, it makes me hungry thinking about it.

Yes, Little E was so worth it, the 4 long years it took to get him here, the 9 long months of being so sick, the baby I lost...I would do it again in a heartbeat, in fact I pray I'm able to have 1 more baby before I'm too old...I didn't tell you that at the same time I was pregnant with the baby I lost, my sister was also pregnant, we actually had the same due date, February 1st, she already had 1 son, after my baby died, she had an ultrasound and was so upset when she was told she was having another boy, she cried and made a big scene...I remember thinking how ungrateful she was, I would have loved to have had a boy but my baby died...the worse part was she had her son on February 1st, she decided to be induced...I still don't understand why she didn't pick any other date :(. Wow! It sounds like you went through alot to get your girls here. Did you have a bad headache with your first daughter, when they gave you too much of the epidural medicine? I ask b/c I recall seeing a news program a while back with a husband telling a similar story, except his wife did not live, he said after she had the baby she had a terrible headache and then she went down hill very quickly. It sounds like with both deliveries you could have had pretty good grounds to sue...it just goes to show there's nothing like a mother's love...look how much we can go through to get our children here, yet we're willing to do it over and over again, now that's love.

Okay, here's how I was planning to get a copy of my records from my other neuro. A few weeks ago, when I saw the stingy neuro (the neuro who wanted to take me off all pain meds months before surgery...btw, that reminds me, I now know he wanted to take me off all pain meds to be mean, not b/c it's medically necessary...the only thing I would need to do before surgery is have a consult with the anesthesiologist who would be present during my surgery and let him or her know what pain meds I'm currently on so they could give me stronger meds than what they would normally give...apparently the stingy surgeon is still using methods from the "stone age" :eek:.) I acted like I had intentions of letting him fix L1, I did it just to get out of his office...he gave me an x-ray order b/c he wanted to make sure my fused site, L5-S1, is stable and the hardware is still in its correct place...he said in the meantime he would have his assistant, Trish, request my records from my other neuro. (I've told you this part already.) Last week Trish called and left a message saying she received my records from my old neuro...I thought that was odd b/c on Jan 30th my other neuro's office had signed for a letter I sent them by certified mail, in the letter I requested a copy of my records and I still had not received them...that's when I called and spoke with my other neuro's assistant, Deb, and was told she had lost my records...so I thought, ok, I need to have x-rays of my fused site done anyway, so I know my fused site is not the cause of my pain...I thought I would have the x-rays done, make a follow-up appt with stingy neuro so he could read the x-rays for me and give me, in writing of course, his opinion of what needs to be done to fix my back problems/pain problems and at that same visit ask his assistant for a copy of the records my other neuro sent them...if stingy neuro's assistant refused to give me a copy of the records from my other neuro I planned to take my "second opinion" from stingy neuro and make an appt with my other neuro to show him the "second opinion" (even though our doctor/patient relationship was broken months ago and I have no intention of ever mending it) and I figured once he came into the exam room with my file I'd tell him he could go make a copy of everything inside it or I would but either way I had no intention of leaving his office without my medical records.

My husband thought my plan was too complicated, he said the bottom line is it's a heck of a big deal if, infact, his office really did lose my medical records, not to mention a breach of the privacy act...it means any joe on the street could have my medical records and my neuro could care less...why did I not find out about it until I called his assistant? Why didn't they call me? They obviously received my letter...can you tell my husband is angry about this? He thinks I should go to his office and demand a copy of my medical records and if they still say they can't find them, say, "oh really, I believe that's a violation of my privacy rights, do I need to call my lawyer?"....he thinks that will shake them up enough to get results...he says I'll atleast know if they really lost my records or not. Now I only need to find someone to go with me. I think that's what I will end up doing. What do you think?

I'm sorry I wrote a novel today. I had so much to say :D.

Take Care,
Scrappi

Hello Ladybug :wave:,

I haven't seen you online or heard from you in a few days...is everything okay? I hope your back problems and nerve pain are not causing you more pain than normal.

I honestly hope I haven't heard from you because you've felt GREAT the last few days and have been out and about enjoying it :).

Unfortunately, I have some not-so-good news to report :(...since last Friday, which was basically when I resumed living again after being flat on my back for a week...you know the details...sick from the flu and from starting the Duragesic patch, anyhow, since last Friday my pain level has skyrocketed once again. I would say it's every bit as high as it was when I was taking Oxy :(...I just called my doctor today because I thought it would work itself out but it hasn't eased up one bit. I have an appt with her on Monday morning. I feel very confident that she will adjust the patch for me. She is, after all, an angel :angel: in disguise. I'll let you know what she decides to do.

I hope to hear from you soon. Have a wonderful weekend.

Patiently waiting,
Scrappi

Hey Scrappi,

Sorry that I havent responded....Im fine...lol. I have been really really busy...so not much computer time over the last couple of weeks. We started almost 2 years ago getting the house painted...got most of it done...then I got hurt...so we had put the rest of the house on hold. Well...it was well past time to get the rest of the house done...not having the money to pay the guy that we hired 2 years ago do the painting..(he was VERY expensive..but really good! LOL) ..some friends came over last weekend and finished up the painting for us. so I have been busy trying to get the house back together....cleaning everything really good before putting things back into its place. What would have taken me a day..maybe 2..a couple of years ago....is now taking me 5+ days so far to complete. I HOPE to be finished by tomorrow...so that I can get the rest of the house cleaning caught up! ha! I have been hurting....as you can imagine...but...i just try to suck it up because its gotta get done. I do not like things out of order!!! It drives me insane!!!!! and alot of the deep cleaning has not been done since I got hurt....so Im taking advantage of getting everyones help while we have everything torn upside down! ha! it really has been hard...but I have been extra careful to take it easy and not overdo it...or to do something that I shouldnt be doing.

But since this is going to be a catch up response..and will be quite lengthy..Im not gonna respond on the small talk issues if thats ok?! lol. But I do want to answer one of your questions....lol..."kin folk" is relatives...LOL. I have relatives in Cincinnati. That was just too funny...you learned a new word today...haha.

As far as your constipation....been there...done that!!! I've been through it with narcotics (no one told me that narcotics affect you that way...I learned it the hard way!!)....then the spell that I had last year for 5 months....(i still think its back related...but thank GOD its pretty much better now)....so I know all too well about it!! I dont really know what all you have been doing...but heres things that I done....I increased my fiber..by foods and fiber sure (not sure if you know, but we are supposed to get like 35 grams a day..which I barely get 15 most of the time...lol)......LOTS of water...i took 4 stool softeners a day.....and lets not forget those suppositories!!! I literally was using 2 at a time 3-4 times a day!!!!! Then I started drinking mineral oil NONE of it worked for me to where I was able to get back on track on a permanent basis...it would help for the moment, or for a day or two...but then right back where I started. The ONE THING that worked....and I continue doing when I feel that I have to go but cant....3 cups of coffee with sugar and creamer....that will do the trick EVERYTIME!!! Ive never been one to drink coffee on a regular basis...but it really does help...so its almost an every day thing now...or at least 3 times a week. I have not been badly constipated since I started doing that. I would feel that way for a day..or heck even for an hour.....drink the coffee..and within an hour...Im going to the potty!! lol....

I was also told by a nurse to drink hot water...the hottest you can stand it...prior to bedtime...along with your milk of magnesia or whatever you take for constipation. so maybe that will help you.

yes, my former dr prescribed me tramadol 1 every 8 hours. as you well know, it isnt strong enough!! which is why i take 2. up until the last month or so, I rarely had to resort to taking it that often....now Im having to take it alot more often (and this was before dealing with the painting issues).

that sounds like a great plan on how to get copies of your medical records!! your plan and your hubbies....between the two...one of them should work!! let me know how it goes!

im sooooo sorry to hear that your pain is back! man i hate that...i really do. but hopefully your dr will do something more to help you. let me know how it goes. at least you did have a few pain free days to enjoy life again...I certainly hope the dr can get you to that point again and for it to last a little longer than it did this time.

Well...Im gonna go on to bed now. Forgive me if I dont get back to you as quickly as I normally would...but I am really hoping that things will start to slow down after tomorrow...;)

Scrappi.......where have you been?? are you ok???? talk to me.

Scrappi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i havent heard from you since 2-29.....please tell me that you are just taking a break from the computer and that you are ok!!! :confused:

my drs appt is monday........im nervous/scared and yet excited too.
how did your appt go today???? (the 14th)

come back!!! i miss my back buddy!! :(

Hello Ladybug,

I'm sorry I haven't posted in the last 2 weeks, I honestly had no idea that much time had gone by. I didn't deliberately plan on taking a break, things have just been really hectic lately. I can't fully explain what has been going on now, but I will in the next day or two...I hope to be able to explain everything later tonight.

Thanks for not giving up on me!

Scrappi'

Scrappi!! Thank goodness!!!! girl you scared the crap out of me!! I didnt know what in the world to think...and didnt know how to find out anything. Im glad that you finally came back....and I look forward to hearing from you again. You have kept me sane these last few months...well...half way anyway...lol.

Ladybug,

Lol, I'm glad I've kept someone sane, atleast halfway...lol. I can't believe your appt with the neuro is Monday. It seemed so far away and now it seems so close, doesn't it? I'm praying your appt goes well and you don't end up a spiney for life like me, but if you do at least we can be online back buddies for life...lol...you can find some comfort in that, right? Lol.

I'm exhausted tonight, like I seem to be all the time these days, but I'll post tomorrow to update you on my back/pain problems. I hope your pain has been bearable and continues to be until atleast Monday. Did you get your house put back the way you wanted it? I hope so!

I wish we were neighbors, that would be nice during times like these :).

I'll talk to you tomorrow.

Take care,
Scrappi'

Hey Scrappi!!

Nice to see you back on here..lol.
Yeah my appt is Monday..Im excited..and scared. Its almost like its gonna be the first day of the rest of my life. Ive NEVER been this excited to go to a dr!! :D I just pray that he keeps the "s" word out of the picture. I know that it sounds kinda insane...but..I do kinda hope that I hear the words that its too late for surgery.....but Im sure that you can understand my meaning on that one. Life is depressing enough....I dont want surgery to make things worse and complicate my life even more. For the most part, I have adapted to my "disabilities" and accepted my limitations and pain. But every so often...I get smacked in the face with it, and it gets so depressing. I used to love to go bowling...never done it on a regular basis (I guess thats a good thing, since I wasnt addicted to it!)...but I still enjoyed it when I did go. Every so often, my kids, or friends, makes plans to go..and it just upsets me because I cant do it anymore. I ALWAYS LOVED going to the fair and riding rides with my girls....another part of my life that is history. And just a few weeks ago, my mother in law was wanting to plan another family vacation....well.....what is there to plan that I can do??? She was wanting to go to Disney World..or Dollywood. I cant ride rides..I cant walk as much walking as those would take....Soooooo....everyone is having to try to come up with a trip idea that I would be able to do. Now thats asking the impossible!! The beach is about the only thing that I can do....and thats just not fair to everyone. This weekend, Joyce Meyers ministries is in town...I LOVE listening to her!! She is comical, and makes things make sense....but....once again....its something I had to do without. I dont know how long she would be preaching......but I can imagine that its at least 2 hours......theres no way in this world I could sit that long...and on top of that, I would be sooo freaking embarrassed once it was over, trying to stand back up. It really is truly embarrassing. So anyway...back to the dr....Im hoping all goes well too....thank you for the good luck wishes.

As far as the house......Im kinda done..lol. Once I got down to the small stuff...pretty much done....I was so tired and bored with it...I kinda stopped..lol. I have 4 sets of curtains to wash and put the curtain hangers up, then hang the curtains. BUT...from where we painted the other rooms 2 years ago....i STILL have pictures in the closets that I have to hang!!! I have a bad habit of that. A few years ago, I stripped and re-stained my kitchen table and have 6 chairs with it....I got down to the very last chair..and decided I had had enough!! .and after 2 very long years of procrastinating....I FINALLY got it done this past year..lol. ALL I had left to do on it was stain it......I just got so bored with it, that I couldnt seem to bring myself to finish it.

I really wish that we were neighbors too!! I really enjoy chatting with you. If I ever take too long getting back to you..its because for some reason, yahoo doesnt send me the notifications all the time. its kinda strange. Just looking through the new postings..there have been times that Im like "oh my....here that person has been waiting on me to respond and I didnt even know it!" I dont know why it does that??

Well..I hope to hear from you soon about how things are going with you and your pain and your drs visit. I certainly hope things are looking brighter for you now. Take care!

You know it would be so nice to have some of my spiney friends as my neighbors! We could just all "gimp" around the neighborhood visiting each other. When my pain is a "3" I could help someone having a "7,8,9,10" day!

Deb

Deb...that would be very nice, wouldnt it? lol. ya'll come on down to NC and we can all have a blast complaining....and be there for each other when we are having our worst of days. man.....that really would be the best! LOL. all of you seem to be so nice and seem like you could keep one laughing! thats what we all need!

Hey Ladybug,
I will wait anxiously for your update about this LONG awaited doctors appt. Post as soon as you can! I hope the news is not as bad as you anticipate. OK...North Carolina isn't too far away from me! I'll just have to bring the grandkids though.....I'd miss them too much! Can't you see us all comparing scars, rods, pain ? What a site! :)

Deb

Hey Deb,

I will be certain to post how things go at the dr as soon as I get home. ;)
I hope it isnt as bad as I anticipate either. If he is as good as everyone says, I think he will be just as ticked as I am for how long it has taken to get me medical treatment.....and I think he will see things my way, as far as needing/wanting me to attempt physical therapy before mentioning surgery. I just hope that he doesnt let me down too.
Thats right...Im just a few hours away....what 2-3-4?? something like that..lol. Yeah...Bring them grandkids!! The more the merrier!! lol. How old are they? After I posted earlier, I got to chuckling...it would be great to have a neighborhood full of us ole spineys...just build a development especially for people with back problems..we certainly would never run out of anything to talk about or to compare..lol. :D
How are things your way?

Yep, all first floor master bedrooms, high bathroom sinks so we don't have to bend to brush our teeth, showers with seats....you know all the geriatric stuff!! ;) even though some on this board are not geriatric. Oh well, we'd be comfy right? Grandkids are 7, 5, 3 and 15 months. Now that will keep us all on our toes!
Good luck with your appt tomorrow. keep us posted!

Deb

Hey Deb!

LOL...that is so funny!!! Yes ma'am...Id be very comfy if things were at the right height!!
Yep.....grandkids are at the right ages to keep everyone hopping!! lol But i love kids...so thats ok! Im excited to have grandkids of my own one day....just not for at least another 5-8 years...LOL gotta get em out of high school and college before i want them to give me grandkids...lol.
Thanks. I will report on here how things went as soon as I get home. Probably around noon-ish.

Hello Ladybug,

Any news yet? I'm anxiously waiting to hear how your appt went?

I'm sorry I didn't post over the weekend. My doctor increased my pain meds not long ago and I've been having a difficult time getting use to the higher dose...to say the least, it was a LONG weekend. I'll explain it a little better later, after I know what your future holds...lol...a future, I hope that is much better than mine :D.

Take care,
Scrappi

Scrappi and Deb,

Im NOT a very happy camper. My expectations of him were quickly diminished. Not that friendly, more down to business than anything. No exams given. He did not ask about my pain level, or if I needed anything for pain. He very quickly glanced over my records...so fast, that there is no way he absorbed anything. He's ready for me to set the surgery up...I asked about therapy, and he said "sure, we can try that, cant guarantee that you wont get worse with it"...."but in the mean time, go ahead and get it penciled in for surgery". But in the same sentence he said....surgery will not fix my back pain (which i knew) because of the arthritis....and that since its been so long since the injury occurred, it may not help with the leg pain, if it does, it will take a very long time. and yet....hes said that theres a 90% success rate. OKKKK....how can those two sentences be said together???? I didnt ask....he didnt make me feel that I was there to be his patient. Im a wc deal....he wants to hurry up and get me out of there. Thats the way I was made to feel. His very last words to me was, "my goal is to hurry up and get you back to work".........!!!!!!!!!!!!! Not to hurry up and make me get better!! I dont know, he just made me feel that all of this prolonging and procrastination is my fault. He never said one word about my not having a dr for so long.....So now what do I do?????? I just want AWAY from wc!!

Oh yeah.........I have NO follow-up visits with him....period........the next time i see him will be when/if I have surgery!!????? Met him today.....and will never see him again until the day of surgery?? Whats up with that????

I'm sorry Ladybug :(.

Unfortunately, some of the things he said to you sound so familiar to me! I don't think he said them b/c you are wc...it must be something neuro's are taught in medical school - how to talk down to patients and treat 'em like dirt.

I have so much to say but I have to lay my son down for his nap first. Hang on for a sec.

I'll be back.

Scrappi'

ok..just let me know when you are here. i will have to keep checking to see if you have posted.

Ladybug,
I'm sure you are just furious :mad: You have waited so long for this appt and then to have the doctor be so abrupt and uncaring! I am so sorry for you. What does he feel the problem is? Does he want to do a fusion, laminectomy? I'll have to think about this one! I'm not sure what I think you should do. Bummer girlfriend :( Hang in there and see what kind of responses you get from your spiney buddies! I'll catch up with you later.

Deb

Hey Deb....

His first words to me was "you dont smoke do you?"...i said that i do. he reached up, grabbed a paper and abruptly handed it to me...and told me that i needed to stop, that that is what ruined my back. ??????????? and then i mentioned that i didnt want one surgery turning into two or three...and he said....keep smoking...and it will. ??!!! because smoking destroys your discs, vessels, etc. he said that i dont need fusion at this point, but if i dont quit smoking, it would cause the first surgery to fail. and I would eventually need fusion??

the problem is definitely the L5-S1 herniated disc with nerve impingement...the disc material is trapped with no where to go....so lamin. and microdisc. is needed.

im just so disappointed, and ticked at the same time. why would he be so eager to race into surgery....why not give me time to see if therapy helps, come back in a few weeks for a follow up, then go from there?? but he wants to get the surgery date set now.....and if therapy helps, then i can cancel the surgery if i want. i dont know..i just dont like the idea of meeting someone today, and not see them again until cutting time...that just doesnt sound right to me.

Ladybug,

Listen to your gut on this one. If I've learned anything through my back journey it's been to listen to my own instincts...I know how easy it is to push our own ideas aside, especially when we have everyone around us chiming in with their own opinions, but this decision is primarily going to affect you, for the rest of your life, no one else's. From my own personal experience, I would NEVER let another surgeon have 1 pre-op appt with me, perform surgery without me seeing him again until my 6 week post-op appt. Speaking from experience, a good, caring surgeon doesn't run a practice this way. A good surgeon is looking out for you, regardless if you're a wc case or not...if he was a good surgeon, as soon as you let him know how you felt about surgery, he would've stopped trying to push it onto you and would have put together a game plan you were comfortable with. Ladybug, I know you don't want to hear this, but please do not let this doctor touch you. How a doctor treats you prior to surgery is a good indicator of how he will treat you post-op...I believe you told me that. I know you have a good head on your shoulders and make good decisions, I just don't want you to make an unwise decision this time b/c you've been made to feel like this is your only option...surgery may be your only option but this doctor is not the one that needs to be performing it. I'm not sure how this will affect your wc claim, will wc drop the claim, or deny it, if you refuse to let this neuro do the surgery? If wc tried to push you into a corner, it may be time to decide whether it's worth it to wait it out and fight longer or if you should drop the claim and use your health ins to get proper care.

Hang in there Ladybug. I know how you feel, you can talk to me anytime, I'll be here for you.

Take care,
Scrappin'

Ladybug,

After I replied to your post, I was rereading your post and found something your neuro said to you very familiar.

But in the same sentence he said....surgery will not fix my back pain (which i knew) because of the arthritis....and that since its been so long since the injury occurred, it may not help with the leg pain, if it does, it will take a very long time. and yet....hes said that theres a 90% success rate. OKKKK....how can those two sentences be said together????

My neuro and your neuro must have gone to the same medical school. My fusion was also at L5-S1 and before surgery I was led to believe that the fusion would take care of my back pain...my neuro said my left leg would probably be permanently numb b/c the nerve had been pinched for over a year....ofcourse my neuro used those unusually high success statistics, which I didn't think to question back then (now I know those numbers are doctored)...after surgery when my back pain didn't go away all anyone in his office could talk about was my left leg (yeah, the NUMB one) and how my neuro did the fusion to take care of my nerve pain in my leg, not to relieve my back pain...since day 1 I have NEVER had leg pain, so after surgery my doctor, his nurse and his secretary all told me how great I did b/c I had no leg pain...it's hard to have leg pain when I have no feeling in my leg...I'm also sure I'm included in his success rate that he's giving to his new patients. I'm convinced all of this neuro's are terrible doctor's, none of them truly want to help people like us, they're in this business for the money, that's why your neuro wanted to get you on the schedule asap, more money in his pocket quicker. He was honest with you though, I have to give him credit for that...being on the other side of surgery, surgery isn't going to make a difference, it sounds like you have an injury similar to mine and statistics do show that people that have surgery versuses people that don't, don't do any better in the long run, people that have surgery still need lifetime pain meds, etc. Unbelievable, hun?

How did you leave things with him? Did you schedule surgery?

Hang in there! I'm praying for you.

Scrappi

Hey Ladybug,
Several thoughts......
Usually your private insurance will not pay for any medical care that has been filed through W/C. Even if you drop W/C there is a good chance they will not cover anything related to this particular back injury. Check with your insurance company.
Check and research the W/C laws for your state. Every state is different, but in Va. they have to grant you a second opinion.
If you have an L5-S1 herniation with nerve pain and it has not improved over all these months, there is a chance it may not improve without surgery. When PT knows that you are already herniated with nerve impingment they are not going to be as agressive with PT for fear they will make your issue worse. At least that is what I found. The lami may help with the nerve pain but then again since the nerve has been impinged for so long you may have permanent nerve damage. So you really have some thinking to do girl. But I would definitely ask for a second opinion and try PT before you do anything.
OK, now for the nurse side of me....he is right about the smoking. I don't agree though with the way he presented it to you. When you are injured you need all your blood cells to help heal the injured site. Blood cells carry oxygen and nutrients. Your blood cells don't carrry as much oxygen and nutrients as someone who does not smoke. Instead of being saturated with all oxygen, the smoke saturates a part of your blood cells. Since the tissue doesn't receive as much oxygen and nutrients it really slows down and hampers the healing time as well as making tissue, muscles, etc. a little more fragile. So he is right, but being critical doesn't accomplish as much as explaining WHY smoking causes this to happen. Now, we all know many smokers who have healed just fine and are doing well. There is no way to predict which smokers will have problems but if you ask any surgeon about operating on smokers, they will tell you that healing times are longer and they have many more complications. When a smoker has surgery and is inactive (as you have to be after any back surgery)the chances increase for pneumonia. I'm not being critical here Ladybug, just trying to explain and give you the facts as I know them. ;)
Good luck girl and let us know what you decide.

Deb

Hey Deb and Scrappi,

Sorry it took me so long to get back with you. Been absorbing all of this, trying to figure out what to do. Im checking into things with my attorney about giving up wc and to learn if my insurance will take over. I just spoke with a friend of mine who is one that gave me a high recommendation of the neurosurgeon. She was not on wc..so I felt that in talking with her, I would know if thats his standard way of doing things, or if it was just me because I am on wc. She told me that he was the same with her....the when a dr sends you to a neurosurgeon, that its because they cant do anything further to help you, and the neurosurgeon can only do surgery...so thats why they dont offer more help to you. That you are being sent to his office for surgery, because thats just what he does. So that made me feel better to know that it wasnt just me.

As far as smoking, I will be the first to agree that smoking is horrible for a person. My dad died..yesterday marked 3 years, from emphysema. I know that I need to quit for MANY reasons, and I do plan to attempt it again. I quit 2 years ago for 4 months...so I know that I can do it. But, it seems that every dr blames everything on smoking...and that irks me. My sister had the surgery a few years back....and she NEVER smoked a day in her life....and the surgery didnt help her. The friend I was talking about earlier, she never smoked in her life....the surgery helped...to a point...but she still had spasms real bad after surgery, so they went in a few months later and killed the nerved. Her surgery was 10 years ago....so I guess, all in all, it did kinda help her. But it wasnt the surgery itself that helped...she had to have that additional procedure. When my hubby had his many years ago...(20+)...it didnt help him at all...in fact, within a couple of months, they had to go back in and do another surgery to fix and repair things....scar tissue, disc problems, etc....so to me...smoking should not be mentioned as a reason why surgery will fail. Smoking is blamed on everything....and it just gets old. My girls have allergies, and I was told that smoking around them was the cause of their problems, keeping things irritated. Soooo....I no longer smoked around them......I smoke outside ONLY........they are never around smoking....havent been in the last 10 years...and their allergies are still bad. So it just irritates me to hear that smoking is the problem of everything going wrong...
I know that you werent being critical....as I said, I very well know the problems that smoking causes......and everything you said does make sense. But the way the dr approached things yesterday, that was the very first thing and I just dont feel that smoking will cause the surgery to fail....it might help to contribute, but it wont be the full cause.

I have not scheduled surgery.....Im holding off on that decision. My primary focus at this point is to do more therapy.....and get my strength built back up.....I dont have to make that decision right now, I was advised by my attorney to take as long as I needed to decide....to not rush into any decision, and feel that its something i have to agree or disagree to right now....but that i will eventually have to make up my mind somehow....but i am allowed to take a few months to toss it.

If I absolutely refuse to do the surgery, wc has the right to end paying me weekly benefits...and send me back to work just as I am right now, with no restrictions. Because in their eyes, if I refuse surgery, thats saying that Im not suffering and and ok, and therefore, I should be fine to go to work with no restrictions. So, I cant just "refuse" the surgery.....BUT, if I take my time on a decision, and decide to go with a settlement.....they cant make me do the surgery, or make me go back to work.

I dont know what I want to do. As I told my friend....I would like to get back to work one day.....as sitting around the house doing nothing is absolutely boring and Im ready to get back out there and work. BUT, if I dont do the surgery.....i CANT work....period. So, thats another part of my decision. I know that its no guarantee that I can work after surgery.....BUT, I do know that with my condition today, I cannot work. So...thats another thing to think on. UGH!! lol..

thank you for listening to me gripe and grumble....and giving me things to think on, and advice. its not a decision that im going to race into either way.

Hey Ladybug,
That certainly sounds like a plan! I'm glad you are going to take time to ponder this and check out all of your options. You've been on this board long enough to know that surgery carries no gaurantees for pain relief. I'm glad you didn't think I was being critical of your smoking. Since your doc didn't take the time to tell you WHY AND HOW smoking effects surgical outcomes, I thought I would just tell you. My parents both smoked also, Dad died of emphysema and Mom quit smoking cold turkey after smoking for 50 years! I NEVER in my wildest dreams thought she would ever quit. Keep us updated girl and I will pray that you find guidance to aid in your decision. Keep the old chin up ;)

Deb

Hello Ladybug,

W/C can stop paying you and release you back to work if you refuse to have surgery based on this neuro you had the appt with last Monday? There is something terribly wrong with our system if that's true! In my opinion, I think b/c you were without any medical care for so long thanks to wc, surgery will prove to be unsuccessful...it's easier for me to see that b/c I'm on the other side of surgery...I had a compressed nerve for 9 months in my left leg and foot prior to my fusion and, as you know, I will never have feeling in my left leg or foot ever again, unless of course a miracle occurs...apparently surgeons do fusions to correct nerve problems/pain, not back problems/pain, which may be possible if your nerve has been compressed for a few weeks or even a few months but not months and years. You should ask wc what happens after surgery when your neuro has officially classified you as a failed fusion statistic...is wc then going to foot your medical bills for the rest of your life? I honestly think your best bet is to not have surgery and deal with the chronic pain and other symptoms from your injury as they appear...find a good pain management doctor or GP who can control your pain, but it sounds like it's not your choice, wc gets to make the choice, right? How wrong! I'm sorry if my post has an angry tone to it...I feel angry for you b/c I care and b/c I've been through a similiar situation...what doctors and insurance companies and wc can do to us honest people is terrible...I hate it! It drives me crazy!

I am glad they're giving you time to think things over, even if your options are limited. I hope whatever decision you make turns out to be the right one for you. I'll be praying for you, praying for the Good Lord to guide you in your decision-making.

Take care,
Scrappin'

hey scrappi....are you online now? just wondering. am thinking that its time to start a new thread. LOL i will be watching for you.

Hey Scrappi....

Yes, legally, if I refuse any recommended treatment, then wc can stop paying my weekly benefits, and my dr can legally release me back to work with no restrictions........as crazy and stupid as it sounds...so yes, it would be "fatal" for me to refuse treatments. (im not sure if you know what weekly benefits are...its 2/3 of what i was earning per week when i got hurt, they have to pay that until im released to go back to work). yes, there is something terribly wrong with our system....but its just as crazy and whacky as any other system in our country. maybe even moreso. They take a refusal as my saying that Im ok and dont need further care. I have time to think on it, which of course, I am going to do. They arent "giving" me the time..Im taking the time!!! lol Given that I will be doing more PT, that will bide me a little more time...and in the meantime...other options will be tossed and talked about with my attorney...settlement wise. thats the ONLY thing that will save me from having to go through surgery. Im not sold on surgery, but, Im at least not knocking it totally out of my mind. 95% against....lets just say that much. with wc....NOTHING is your choice. you do just as the dr recommends...period! if he tells me to stand on my head and yell that im a loser...i HAVE to legally do it or lose my benefits! LOL. as long as i abide by their rules and dr recommendations, they have to pay for my medical for as long as it takes...or until a settlement agreement is reached. BUT they have the right to refuse to pay for any treatment that a dr recommends. for instance, if a dr suggests me to try a chiropractor.....wc has the right to deny it. ????????? i cant deny any course of treatment that the dr recommends....but wc CAN!! even though the dr is recommending surgery.......its VERY possible that wc will refuse to pay for it. its really crazy and so far beyond ridiculous.....so yeah....you kinda feel screwed no matter which way you turn with it.

The only thing thats important to me is either getting better....which I dont think is possible now.......and making certain that I dont lose out on even more with my life and my girls. Hearing all of the stories on this forum has really been informative, and has helped me to learn just exactly what i will be facing if i allow them to force me into surgery. If I didnt have this forum to go to.....I probably would have done the surgery, no questions asked....and went on the drs word that they could help me. I have even had some of the drs to tell me that I shouldnt read these forums, because the "success stories do not post on the boards, that all Im hearing from is the 10% that didnt work". well, i tell you what...between this board and another board i go to.....there sure are a heck of alot of 10%'ers out there.....lol.

It still doesnt make the decision totally easy to make. I will always wonder "what if" I can be able to go back to at least living 80% of my life again?? am i screwing myself out of that chance by not trying?? its just so hard to make that final decision. and the sad part is...no one can make that decision except for me. i have to live with whatever decision i make.


Deb..........no, i wasnt thinking of you as being critical on my smoking...lol. its a bad bad bad habit, i know!!! actually, ive decided to go to my primary dr on thurs and get an rx for the chantix. IF..thats a BIG IF....i do the surgery...i do not want to give the dr ANY reason to say "it failed because you smoke!!". ive quit before, i can and will again! Im sorry to hear about your dad. That is one horrible disease to watch your loved one suffer with. I literally watched my dad die on his last day. I have a posting in the grief section if you want to read it. To a point, Im thankful that my girls were there for a few minutes of his suffering on his last day......(we didnt allow them to stay because we didnt want to traumatize them, they were there long enough to say i love you and goodbyes)......but it was enough for them to say....smoking is stupid...you get what you ask for!!! (yes, thats what they tell me, in trying to get me to quit). so given that.....i have no worries at all about them ever smoking!!

I will keep you updated....and will TRY to keep my chin up ;) its hard at times, thats for certain.

Hey Ladybug,

Yeah, I do think we should start a new thread. I'll start a new one titled, "Treatment Options".

Does my status show I'm always online? I was wondering b/c of your post around 2 this morning. I have DSL, so my connection is always up and running...atleast that's how the cable co advertised it as being, lol...and I've always thought once I shut my laptop my status shows I'm no longer online.

I'll go post on the new thread.

See ya,
Scrappi