a few minutes ago. I thought I had a spider bite on my hairline down there. I had something on my elbow last year that was basically identical to this one. The only reason I went to the doctor today is because it was in a private place. The doc says it is a form of herpes. I haven't had sex in 4 or 5 months. Should I get a second opinion? He gave me valtrex samples to take one for 3 days. I just told my boyfriend, well he's been my ex boyfriend and we've been slowly talking lately. He seemed to be upset about it too. I haven't been with anyone else since him. How could I have gotten this? :confused:

Will this make him love me less, or worse tell everybody he knows and move on?

Did he do tests to see if that's what it really was? If he did... In my opinion, I would wait to see what the results are. And if he didn't... I would definitly get a second opinion. You would need to do it right away though before it heals b/c they usually take fluids from the OB to run tests. I've also heard they can do blood tests but if the virus is dormant then you may not get true results.

I read that it can lie dormant for a long time... Maybe even years. Certain foods and stress (among other things) can trigger an OB. Some people have just one OB and don't ever have another one but then on the other end of the spectrum some have constant OBs. It all depends on how your body reacts to the virus.

I don't think he has been tested, but I'm sure he will now. But again, I had this place on my arm (elbow) that I thought was a spider bite, and this spot down there looks identical to it. So my elbow may have been herpes also.

The question that is running me down is who I got it from. I've only had a one night stand once in my life, and that was years ago. I believe my relationship will end because of this. I haven't had sex in 4 or 5 months, why am i having this outbreak now?

Yes I see what you mean now. He used a q-tip thingy and scraped it several times. But what doesnt make sense as how could I have gotten it?

I have been realllllyyy stressed lately, to the point I didnt even go to work yesterday.

LIke Kitkat says, you could have one ob and not get one for years. I had my primary ob 7 years ago and never (knock on wood) since then. doctors also say that many don't even know they have it because they don't get symptoms. Maybe one of you had it before without knowing. You could also get it from oral sex if your partner has cold sores. that's how I got it. I would wait until the dr calls you back with the test result. try not to stress too much, it will just make things worse, herpes strives on stress!

My boyfriend had a doc appt today to get checked. The doc told him he doesn't have it. They did a blood test on him because he has no symptoms. He also hasn't has sex in the last 4 or 5 months because we were with each other last. The doc told him that if he hasn't had sex in the last 4 or 5 months, if he had it he would have had an outbreak by now.

I am confused because my doc told me something different. My doc told me that you can have it for years and not have your first outbreak. I haven't been with anyone else since him, and it bothers me that he doesn't have it. I mean, I'm glad he doesnt have it, I just want to know where *I* got it from.
I dont want to ever pass it to him and we have always had unprotected sex. I just found out that I have it.

Why is he clean but not me? Either of us have been with anyone else?

You still don't know that you have it. It really doesn't sound like it. Just because a doctor tests for something, that doesn't mean you have it. They just have to rule out things.

Even though the doc says I have herpes, I may not still? I have been mentally insane since yesterday over this, and even more so today since my SO doesn't have it. His doctor told him that if he had it, he would have had an outbreak by now. He says he doesn't care and still wants to be with me, but I already told him that if it were me, I would have questioned who he's been with recently, or even cheated on me with.

PS I took my second dose of the valtrex and its already about gone.

I have been literally shaking in my skin and crying off an on wondering who gave it to me, or even worse, who I could have possibly given it to.

Some other info, I noticed about 5 years ago that I had been getting "spider bites" more often than the regular person. My own mother even asked me (before I went to the doc) why I keep getting spider bites. This is the only one that I've been to the doctor for, and its herpes. I know I've been with around 4 people in the last 5 years, maybe even 5. I just get upset that I may have given it to someone else. I dont even know how to get in touch with most of them. I've only been with 2 people in the last couple of years. The others were more at a time when I used to hang out with friends, drinking and clubbing which I dont do anymore

You're getting yourself all whipped up over possibly nothing. It could be hives for all you know now. If it is herpes, it is not likely that you'll have an outbreak on your elbow and later on your genital area. The doctor thought it looked like herpes but did not test you yet. A lot of things can LOOK like herpes.

Where are you getting "spider bites" so you mother notices them? You said this is the first time you got it in "a private place", that is why you went to the doctor. If it has been showing up on your arms, legs, face....it is not herpes. Herpes outbreaks tend to recur in the same general area.

You need a second opinion.

I'll also point out that your SO's doctor is wrong. Just because he hasn't had an outbreak by now, doesn't mean he doesn' t have it. A person can have herpes and go a lifetime without having an outbreak - they can still spread the virus.

Of course, that doesn't mean he has it, it's a just a point to consider.