My 90-year-old mother just moved in with me. She has a touch of dementia, possibly beginnings of AD. When she has made herself dirty she fights me to get cleaned (she has even bitten me and tried to choke me). She fights to get out of bed (I think she has a touch of depressison also). She fights to eat. I'm trying to make her comfortable, welcome, and healthier and happy. The bathing thing is very strange because she has always been a very clean person. Any ideas out there?
Thanks!!!

No ideas, kiddo, but a whole lot of care! So sorry you're going through this and that she is going through this. I hope someone writes with great ideas. Good gracious, you have so much on your plate!

*******REMOVED********
this says an elderly patient who becomes violent (bathing/toileting are the two most common areas where the violence happens from what all I read) needs to be moved from the home to a nursing facility. :( Probably not the help you were looking for, but it does seem to happen to others as well. Wish I could find better info!

Talk to her PCP about Risperdal. This medicine is used in nursing homes for exactly these behaviors. My grandmother was on it and it works wonders! I know it is tough and I feel for you. I cared for my grandmother for 2 years before she passed. We also had her on Lexapro for the depression. I highly recommend both medications. These lifesavers kept her from having to be placed in a nursing home and made it easier to care for her. God bless you it is not an easy undertaking. Also, you should look into having a caretaker/CNA come in every so often to help and take some pressure off you. :angel:

Bella

WOW Denehocken,you are a truly wonderful person,I cant tell you the admiration I have for you. most people are avoiding responsibility and you are right there.your mother is truly Blessed and most have done a wonderful job in raising you.AD is a very difficult disease and each case is completely different.My father had AD and it was the hardest thing to tolerate for my mother and myself,he had hyperactive behavior,we had to give his car away because he thought he could still go to work,all I can say is its a very difficult position,dont beat yourself up if you lose your temper,or if you decide its to much for you,you are only human,Im pulling for you GOD BLESS YOU. You are my new hero.have a great day you really deserve it. marywoo

It sounds to me like your Mom may have dementia. This is a classic sign of someone who has dementia. The lack of bathing, fighting against being cleaned, all of these are signs of dementia. Has she been to a doctor lately? What is his diagnosis.

I would be cautious putting someone of her age on any meds unless she has had a full workup and you know how she is going to respond. It's one thing to give these in a NH where there are RNs and doctors around, but I would be cautious giving them at home as the side effects can be hard also.

I lost my mother to alzheimers, so I've been down that road...
good luck..

I agree with ibake....My grandmother lived with my parents and my father is a doctor and my mother a nurse and I was also in the medical field. So she was monitored very well. These are harsh medications but they can be life savers...both emotionally and physically. She started them in last couple of years before she passed. They were definitely necessary for her safety and emotional well-being. Hope all is well.

Bella

I keep looking for signs of AD in myself because my oldest brother developed it and it eventually killed him.
He always had a sweet nature and it stayed with him right to the end, he did however forget most of his previous life, remembering best the time in his young manhood when he went to Tahiti and lived with the natives. (I have a snapshot of this handsome man standing on a palm tree that is bent out over the ocean.) I was just a little girl then and he sent me a grass skirt, a shell necklace and an oatmeal box full of beautiful sea shells. He was my hero.
Before he died I received a telephone call...with the aid of his son he called and this plaintive frail voice asked, "Where are you?" He wanted to come and see me! He thought he could get on a bus, travel from Washington State to Indiana and find my house. I begged my nephew to never let him out of his sight!
I did have a scary run in with a woman in the grocery store who was ahead of me in line...she suddenly turned on me and started to berate me for some reason and just as I was about to reply in anger her husband gently put his arm around her shoulders and pull her against his chest and whispered over her head, "She has Alzheimer's..."
I think I would rather be hit by a freight train than suffer that sad disease.