Well, let's see.. I met my boyfriend over a year ago. Around the time, I had been informed that I needed to go to the doctor because someone told me I gave them syphilis.. Which I thought to be impossible because we used a condom. Anyhow, I went and found out that I didn't have it, but that I did have chlamydia. (Weird turn of events, right?) Anyways, I had told this guy I had been talking to about all of it and the day before I found out if I had syphilis or not, I had sex with him... and we used a condom. Oddly enough, him thinking I had syphilis, he took the condom off without my knowing it. He didn't tell me until we were done. (Then finding out I had chlamydia, turns out it's easier to contract HIV.) Well, I found out later that he had sex with some girl the same week as me, and about 2 weeks later, he ended up very sick. Sore throat, fever, the whole nine yards. It was winter, so I figured he just had a cold. I never got sick from him, so I never thought anything more of it. Well, we started dating around march and have been together even since, and now I am starting to get worried after looking up the symptoms of hiv and remembering he had that cold. I have been having diarrhea on and off for while. I am lactose intolerant, so that could explain that, but I don't know. My boyfriend sweats a lot on his back when he sleeps and I have noticed this small purple dot on the inside of my leg. It isn't raised and it doesn't itch or anything. Just one spot. We both have been feeling very nauseated lately, but it could be due to lack of diet... We live with his parents who are poor and we eat about once a day and it alwasy consists of the same thing... Ramen noodles. Sometimes I also cough for no reason... Not a lot, but enough to worry me... The other night, I woke up coughing and there was blood in my mouth. And after putting all of this together, it seems definite to me that he got hiv from whatever girl he slept with before me and then gave it to me.

Oh, might I add that he has been getting weird pimply things that I was just informed about last night. I looked up pictures online and they look similar to a picture I found that said the man was hiv positive. :(

I really don't want to go to the doctor, because I would feel very embarrassed them telling me to my face that I was HIV positive. Also, if it ended up being that way, I have no money and would not be able to afford meds, so I don't know what to do. :(

go to the doctor, it's probably not hiv and you can take that big weight off you shoulders!

I know, I always think that, but then I think about the what if it is...

you can't self-diagnose based on symptoms!!!

Well, my boyfriend went and got tested today. He had the mouth swab test and blood test. The mouth swab test came back negative and we have to wait for the blood test. Is the mouth swab test reliable? Also, is there any possibility that I could have it and he doesn't? We have unprotected sex like everyday.... :x