michelle991
04-02-2008, 10:02 AM
Hi,
I'm wondering if anyone can share some insite for me. My husband is 49 and was diagnosed with hep c and cisshosis about 6 years ago. They told him to stop drinking, but of course he hasn't. He now refuses to go back to the doctor (its been 3 yrs) because he says, its like driving off a cliff. If you don't know your going to go its not so bad. The problem is in the last year his stomach has grown to the point of looking pregnant. He also has blacked out 4 times in the last year. Another thing that worries me is he lost a perfectly good tooth from gum diesaese. I forgot to mention he also was diagnosed with high blood pressure and acid reflux disease. He is on medication for those, but not for the swelling because the doctor is unaware of it. He is still working full time doing constuction and has never missed work. can anyone tell me what to expect??? He sneaks drinking vodka but will drink beer in front of me. His prime complanit is being tired. He will go to bed at 8-8:30. We have a 4 year old son and I'd like to know more about what to expect on how long he might have and how to get him some help. I lost my first husband to a heoin od and I raised my 17 year old myself. I feel like Im reliving the past... Please Help!
I'm wondering if anyone can share some insite for me. My husband is 49 and was diagnosed with hep c and cisshosis about 6 years ago. They told him to stop drinking, but of course he hasn't. He now refuses to go back to the doctor (its been 3 yrs) because he says, its like driving off a cliff. If you don't know your going to go its not so bad. The problem is in the last year his stomach has grown to the point of looking pregnant. He also has blacked out 4 times in the last year. Another thing that worries me is he lost a perfectly good tooth from gum diesaese. I forgot to mention he also was diagnosed with high blood pressure and acid reflux disease. He is on medication for those, but not for the swelling because the doctor is unaware of it. He is still working full time doing constuction and has never missed work. can anyone tell me what to expect??? He sneaks drinking vodka but will drink beer in front of me. His prime complanit is being tired. He will go to bed at 8-8:30. We have a 4 year old son and I'd like to know more about what to expect on how long he might have and how to get him some help. I lost my first husband to a heoin od and I raised my 17 year old myself. I feel like Im reliving the past... Please Help!
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jayneflop
04-04-2008, 10:00 AM
hi my husband is the same age and has recently been diagnosed with chirrosis but he didnt know and has stopped drinking completely cuz it frightened him to death,he had been diagnosed with cellebellar ataxia 4 yrs ago which affects his gait,he has no balance cant walk without aids has constant shaking in his legs his memory his vacant at times and all this is through drinking and now he has chirrosis his legs and stomach are full of water,he looks 10mths pregnant he was yellow couldnt wee when he did it was dark brown was constanly tired all this through booze. Like i said he has stopped drinking but when i asked the doctor his outcome he said cuz hges stopped drinking his outcome can be good but if he carried on he would probably have maximum 5yrs to live could be shorter if he carried on drinking so please tell him about my husband and try to get him to stop he has no life he has aged 20yrs and i have to everything for him let me know how you get on jayne
michelle991
04-04-2008, 04:00 PM
I am going to show him this, but I don't know that it will matter. I just found out through a friend, he has been drinking vodka before he comes home from work as well. I think he does this, so I won't know how much he drinks. You said your husband is swelling ...can't they drain it? My husband has gone from a 34 waist to a 40 over the last year and it is all in his stomach. It really lays heavy on my mind.....You see we have a four year old...If thats not bad enough I also have an 18 year old who lost his father (and my first husband) to a heroin overdose.... I feel like I am reliving the past.... I am only 44 and I know if he doesn't stop drinking his days are limited..... Thanks for responding ...keep me up to date.
jayneflop
04-05-2008, 10:55 AM
hi michelle991 yea they can drain it but at the mo there fobbing us off with taking water tablets but my hubby was the same he went from a 34 waist and now hes about a 42 cuz im having to buy him xxl jogging bottoms which hes never wore in his life,but its a nightmare with him not being able to walk with the cellebellar with this enormous belly its impossible.hes having to sleep downstairs cuz he cant get upstairs,this cellebellar is really hard to cope with its like looking after another baby and i hope your hubby dont get it,my hubby used to sneak drink vodka,he woulld drink it front of me but i didnt know how much,but i am really proud of him now cuz he hasnt had a drink for about 6 weeks because the doctors warned him he would be dead if he carried on,also you now your hubby might be frightened to go to doctors cuz they can smell it on them cuz the 1st time we went the doctor could smell it,i think they can smell it through the skin,perhaps when hes been in the past they might have said that to him but tell him not to worry if he wants help they will help him,but please tell him from me to try and stop we have just lost a friend to it and its not a nice death speak to you soon jayne
michelle991
04-07-2008, 07:20 AM
Hi Jayne,
Thanks for your input....I've tried talking to my husband and showing him things, but he just doesn't want to hear it. He continues to drink.... I have to ask you, does your husband eat okay? I have read that with cirrhosis that their appitite dissappears. That is still not the case with my husband. He eats very well. I have to admit though he is having problems walking with his stomach. He won't admit it, but he waddles like it's uncomfortable. I prey for him as I don't know what else to do....His mood swings seem to be increasingly worse...I know that could be the booze or the liver... I am at wits end....I know it's only a matter of time....I also notice he burps and has a lot of heartburn. He also drinks a tremendous amount of milk. I don't know that it can harm him, but to much of anthing can't be good for you. I am glad your husband stopped drinking...hopefully they can get the swelling down... Let me know how he's doing. Keep in touch - michelle -
Thanks for your input....I've tried talking to my husband and showing him things, but he just doesn't want to hear it. He continues to drink.... I have to ask you, does your husband eat okay? I have read that with cirrhosis that their appitite dissappears. That is still not the case with my husband. He eats very well. I have to admit though he is having problems walking with his stomach. He won't admit it, but he waddles like it's uncomfortable. I prey for him as I don't know what else to do....His mood swings seem to be increasingly worse...I know that could be the booze or the liver... I am at wits end....I know it's only a matter of time....I also notice he burps and has a lot of heartburn. He also drinks a tremendous amount of milk. I don't know that it can harm him, but to much of anthing can't be good for you. I am glad your husband stopped drinking...hopefully they can get the swelling down... Let me know how he's doing. Keep in touch - michelle -
jayneflop
04-07-2008, 09:43 AM
hi michele his appetite is good now but when he was drinking hed go days without hardly anything to eat but then he would like binge i think it was when he felt well,he too was living on heartburn remedies always complaining of heartburn,now when i come to think of it we has wives just keep going on as though is happening but we now that there is when i look back all the signs he was showing was due to the booze and his liver,he was constantly feeling unwell saying hed got the flu,always had diahorrea and sickness but was always putting it down to bugs.I know exactly how you feel they now best and youve just got to shut up and get on with things but at the end of the day i was glad that my hubby was taken very ill and had to go to the hospital and thats when things started rolling and he finally admitted to his drinking causing damage to his body we can only do so much,I hope your hubby does take note but you know im always here if you want to chat and scream speak to you soon jayne
simonsez2
04-08-2008, 07:50 PM
Hi Michelle, my name is Donna and I was reading your post about your husband. I swear I could have been reading about my own except we are not married, we've been together for 14 yrs though. Mine was told he had cirrhosis about two and a half yrs ago and didn't stop drinking either. Then last Nov he was in the hospital for an infection on his feet and we found out he had hep C. He is still drinking beer daily and on the weekends his choice is crown royal. He's another one that won't go back to the dr. only he knows he's sick. I know he wants to live but it's almost as though he doesn't care. The infectious disease dr told him he had to quit drinking for 3 months before he could be treated for the hep,didn't stop, so he is not being treated
I hope to hear back from you soon, Donna
I hope to hear back from you soon, Donna
iluvwv
04-08-2008, 09:21 PM
hello everyone. my hubby is in the hospital... he was told he had hep-c and cirrohis in 2000. he is only 44 years old. he quit drinking july last year. too late. he's in for seizures right now. i didn't know they had seizures. i did a search last night found that seizures do occur with cirrohis. i thought i had studied and knew what to expect with this disease. this is so terrible! if only he would have quit drinking when he found out about the problem we probably wouldn't be going through this. i asked them if they could drain some of the fluid off of my hubby today at the hospital, and they told me no... it would just come right back.
i will be praying for you all. what's ahead is no picnic.
i will be praying for you all. what's ahead is no picnic.
michelle991
04-09-2008, 08:14 AM
Hi Donna,
You know its weied you mentioned crown royal. That is what my husband would drink when we go out. He is now sneaking a pint of vodka (or more) before he comes home from work. I know this because I borrowed me sons friends car and followed him 2 days in a row. I watched him from the parking lot. He drinks it and throws away the bottle before coming home and then brings beer home. I don't dare tell him what I did. He is already very angry that I keep talking about it. Last night I said look at that little boy and look at me ....Are we not more important than liquor....I wanted so badly to tell him what I did, but I know his temper and it wouldn't have been pretty. He won't listen at all. His feet are itching all the time and there is a rash all over them. I know in my heart that his belly is not gonna hold up much longer....I wish so damn much there was something I could do....To make matters worse he loves salt and I know you are supposed to stop the salt because of the fluid retention. You worry me talking about seizures. Could my husband have one driving??? Did yours have any signs that it was going to happen? And what causes it??? I am like you, I have been searching the web for information on Hep c and cirrhosis, but I havn,t seen anything on seizures. Well, My prayers are with you....Let me know how everything is going and I'll do the same. I'm flat angry - scared and afraid.... Michelle
You know its weied you mentioned crown royal. That is what my husband would drink when we go out. He is now sneaking a pint of vodka (or more) before he comes home from work. I know this because I borrowed me sons friends car and followed him 2 days in a row. I watched him from the parking lot. He drinks it and throws away the bottle before coming home and then brings beer home. I don't dare tell him what I did. He is already very angry that I keep talking about it. Last night I said look at that little boy and look at me ....Are we not more important than liquor....I wanted so badly to tell him what I did, but I know his temper and it wouldn't have been pretty. He won't listen at all. His feet are itching all the time and there is a rash all over them. I know in my heart that his belly is not gonna hold up much longer....I wish so damn much there was something I could do....To make matters worse he loves salt and I know you are supposed to stop the salt because of the fluid retention. You worry me talking about seizures. Could my husband have one driving??? Did yours have any signs that it was going to happen? And what causes it??? I am like you, I have been searching the web for information on Hep c and cirrhosis, but I havn,t seen anything on seizures. Well, My prayers are with you....Let me know how everything is going and I'll do the same. I'm flat angry - scared and afraid.... Michelle
michelle991
04-09-2008, 08:17 AM
to iluvwv, Sorry you were the one speaking of seizures....can you give me some insite???? Thanks, Michelle
jayneflop
04-09-2008, 03:04 PM
hi all hope all your hubbys can get well there like kids aint they my prayers are with you and them jayne
simonsez2
04-09-2008, 03:51 PM
Hi Michelle, it's Donna again. How's it going? Good I hope. I didn't know about seizures either. It was news to me when I read it here. The other day is when I accidently found these message boards and I wasn't even going to bother telling my "hubby" about it. This morning when I was getting ready to leave for work, I mentioned it to him, and told him about it and that if he was to stop drinking that there was still hope for him to live a longer life. He seemed like he was a little interested and said umm., but by the time he gets off work tonight, the first thing he is going to do is crack open a tall boy of busch!!! I just know it too well. Hopefully something will click in though.
iluvwv
04-09-2008, 07:51 PM
i had never heard of seizures with cirhossis. when i did the search i put in seizures and cirrhosis and read some interesting stuff, but i'm still so confused. i didn't expect any of this and i thought i had read enough and knew what to expect next... wrong. yesterday they gave him albumin thru his iv... never knew of that either. and gave him 2 units of blood last night and today magnesium, calcium, potassium, and something else thru the iv. they put some really tight socks on his feet (he raised hell cause they hurt) and this morning his feet looked great. the fluid was almost gone, but it still leaves a dent when you push in on his legs...they said that's not good. his stomach is still so big! this is a total nightmare. and tell your hubby that my husband only drank beer. the gastroenterologist told me they had more patients from drinking beer than anything... cause everyone thinks it won't hurt them I guess. Once the damage is there you have to stop! Not to mention what it's putting their family thru.
Prayers are with you all. I'm too tired to type any more.
Prayers are with you all. I'm too tired to type any more.
michelle991
04-10-2008, 08:31 AM
Hi all, I really appreciate all your replies. I still have to ask could my husband just out of the blue have a seizure? He often drives with our 4 yr old in the truck without me. It really worries me.... I also noticed last night my husbands feet are itching more and more and there is a rash. I said something to him about the swelling in them too, but he said there not swelling. I am not crazy, you can't even see his ankle bone and the arch in his feet is almost unnoticeable. He has also had a cold forever...I mean 2 months.....I can't get through to him...He drank vodka and beer last night again. It doesn't seem that anything I say matters. I can only thank God I have all of you to help me through this. I am so fearful as to what is to come. Thanks for listening ...I'm praying- Michelle
simonsez2
04-10-2008, 12:53 PM
You know my hubby ended up in the hospital last Nov because of an infection on his feet. I don't know if it's from the cirrhosis or not, but I believe with all my heart that it was. It started out as a little red rash that itched and he scratched it so bad it got infected on both feet. The top of his feet turned so dark where it had been inflamed that it was just about black. Please try to talk your husband to go to the dr to get this checked out. My hubby's feet was so bad they addmitted him into the hosp. and he was there for one week! That's when we found out he had hep. C
michelle991
04-10-2008, 04:13 PM
I'm glad you told me about your husbands feet. I'm going to say something tonight about it. His are a little black and blue on top and a reddish rash on the sidesand toes. He has had this on and off for several years, but I've never seen them this bad. He has gone in the past to a dermatologist, but I doubt he ever told them he had hep c and cirrhosis. The stuff they gave him helped a little, but it seems to come and go. I heard that when they stop itching that person is in trouble. I read it somewhere online. I'm still looking for info on these seizures....Thanks - Michelle
michelle991
04-10-2008, 04:16 PM
to iluvwv - my prayers are with you and your husband....i'm here if you want vent...
God Bless you both...Michelle
God Bless you both...Michelle
simonsez2
04-13-2008, 12:24 AM
To Michelle--- I wasn't talking about just the color of my husbands feet. He had scratched them raw and they looked like they were burnt from the infection and it almost destroyed the layers of skin from the healing process. I believe the rash came from the cirrhosis but the blackness I believe was from the infection from him scratching and getting it infected. Do you know how they scrape the dead skin from a burn victim? That's what they were discussing with my husband, but luckily, the meds and the cream worked. It took a week but they did work. When he came home from the hosp. I had to put the cream on his feet, wrap his feet in hot wet towels,and cover them with plastic bags for hours. That was for 3 or 4 days. While he was in the hosp. they were even discussing the possibilty of maybe having to amputate his feet if they didn't clear up!!! You would think that would scare him into getting sober, but no such luck!!! Sorry for such a long reply but I wanted to clear up any misconceptions if there was any. Hope all is well, keep me posted please
michelle991
04-17-2008, 08:36 AM
Hi All,
Just thought I'd let you know my husband finally listened to me last night without getting angry. We will see what the day brings - hopefully no alcohol. He did of course drink yesterday....I keep telling him he has to go back to the doctors because of the swelling and the problems urinating. He's gained 45 pounds over the last year and a half, all in his belly and starting in his legs! I told him, I know he loves Tyler and me, and what am I supposed to tell your son when you get sick(er) or worse....That Daddy couldn,t stop drinking! I also told him I didn't hate him, because he drinks...He didn't raise his hand and say "I want to be an alcoholic", it's something that happened and now it's time to do something about it. I am somewhat worried about his kidneys... I heard that if not treated they most likely would fail in about 90 days.....Do you all have any info on that? I heard also that sepsus could set in, due to the back up of waste....That is where the infection goes into the blood system and it is extremely hard to treat. My first mother-in-law died from it. She went into the hospital and 5 days later was gone.....I've gotta admit it's got me a bit scared.....Well, I'll let you know how the evening goes....My prayers are with you all and THANK YOU for putting up with me going on and on...
Just thought I'd let you know my husband finally listened to me last night without getting angry. We will see what the day brings - hopefully no alcohol. He did of course drink yesterday....I keep telling him he has to go back to the doctors because of the swelling and the problems urinating. He's gained 45 pounds over the last year and a half, all in his belly and starting in his legs! I told him, I know he loves Tyler and me, and what am I supposed to tell your son when you get sick(er) or worse....That Daddy couldn,t stop drinking! I also told him I didn't hate him, because he drinks...He didn't raise his hand and say "I want to be an alcoholic", it's something that happened and now it's time to do something about it. I am somewhat worried about his kidneys... I heard that if not treated they most likely would fail in about 90 days.....Do you all have any info on that? I heard also that sepsus could set in, due to the back up of waste....That is where the infection goes into the blood system and it is extremely hard to treat. My first mother-in-law died from it. She went into the hospital and 5 days later was gone.....I've gotta admit it's got me a bit scared.....Well, I'll let you know how the evening goes....My prayers are with you all and THANK YOU for putting up with me going on and on...
iluvwv
04-17-2008, 03:28 PM
my hubby also has problems urinating. a few weeks ago the urologist put him on cardura, to help. also told him to take cranberry pills. it has helped a little bit.
tell your hubby he has made us proud. to just take it one day at a time.
good luck.
tell your hubby he has made us proud. to just take it one day at a time.
good luck.
Michael600
04-26-2008, 07:45 AM
Hi Michelle,
The best thing you could do for your husband is to have him come here and read the messages from other people in similar situations. Maybe, just maybe, it would help him realize that he is KILLING HIMSELF with his present course of action. He may not yet have some of the symptoms that other people here have described, but he WILL get them if he keeps it up.
Another thing you could do is to have him read up on the importance of the liver to the whole body. It is right up there with the heart and the lungs and the stomach, and if the liver is not functioning properly, it is only a matter of time before the whole system breaks down. Toxins that should have been purified by the liver spread throughout the body and the brain. That is why liver disease affects not only physical functioning but also mental acuity.
Tell him to look at it this way: so far he has not experienced the worst of the symptoms, but he can see it happening. And he is the only one who can do anything about it. If he doesnt STOP drinking, he will die. Period.
And if I could talk to him, I would say: "Look, man, your wife who loves you is on this board searching for answers, begging others for suggestions on how to help you, when in reality it is only you who can help yourself. Look what you are putting her through. Think of how she will feel when you have drunk yourself into an early grave because you were too selfish and lazy to shape up and get a grip."
I know he's not a bad person but sometimes you just have to hit the mule over the head with a board to get his attention.
Good luck and God bless you.
Michael
The best thing you could do for your husband is to have him come here and read the messages from other people in similar situations. Maybe, just maybe, it would help him realize that he is KILLING HIMSELF with his present course of action. He may not yet have some of the symptoms that other people here have described, but he WILL get them if he keeps it up.
Another thing you could do is to have him read up on the importance of the liver to the whole body. It is right up there with the heart and the lungs and the stomach, and if the liver is not functioning properly, it is only a matter of time before the whole system breaks down. Toxins that should have been purified by the liver spread throughout the body and the brain. That is why liver disease affects not only physical functioning but also mental acuity.
Tell him to look at it this way: so far he has not experienced the worst of the symptoms, but he can see it happening. And he is the only one who can do anything about it. If he doesnt STOP drinking, he will die. Period.
And if I could talk to him, I would say: "Look, man, your wife who loves you is on this board searching for answers, begging others for suggestions on how to help you, when in reality it is only you who can help yourself. Look what you are putting her through. Think of how she will feel when you have drunk yourself into an early grave because you were too selfish and lazy to shape up and get a grip."
I know he's not a bad person but sometimes you just have to hit the mule over the head with a board to get his attention.
Good luck and God bless you.
Michael
michelle991
04-28-2008, 08:18 AM
Michael,
It's weird to see that name...It is my husbands. I thought he was heading in the right direction as he said he was going to quit drinking. But the very next day he was drinking again....He uses every reason there is (as I knew he would). I printed information on cirrhosis for him and he hasn't even looked at it.
I really worry because of his symptoms. His stomach is extremely swollen, his feet and ankles have edema. He is constantly scratching them and they have sores on them and little bumps. He has started weezing badly and has had a cold for months. He still seems to eat good, but not things that are good for him. He only eats meat and pasta and he loves milk. No fruits and vegies. He never has slept very well and he's been complaining lately he's exhausted. However, he still works full time in the sun and is a pipe foreman. So far it hasn't affected his job. He recently got a great review and a raise. He says if I was so sick, he couldn't do all I do. Also, he has very weird mood swings. For example he actually cried twice the night before last. For him that is weird...He went from joking, to being mean, to crying and back to laughing. I'm having a hard time with this..... I feel I am walking on eggshells.
I wish I knew more about what is going on inside of him. But he refuses to go back to the doctor. He does not have varices yet. But he was diagnosed with acid reflux disease 3 years ago. He is not taking anything for it now, as he says he doesn't have heartburn. I would think that would be a sign of varices??? do you now???? Besides what happens if that goes untreated?
I am at a complete blank. He knows I go on this site and I have researched this a lot. I don't want to watch him die, but I feel I'm already doing that....
I only wish I knew what happens next and how long I have with him....
I really am grateful for people like you. My heart and mind are shot.
Thanks for listening. If you have anything you can help me with, I could use it. I am just flat out beat up over this.
Thanks for your time. Michelle
It's weird to see that name...It is my husbands. I thought he was heading in the right direction as he said he was going to quit drinking. But the very next day he was drinking again....He uses every reason there is (as I knew he would). I printed information on cirrhosis for him and he hasn't even looked at it.
I really worry because of his symptoms. His stomach is extremely swollen, his feet and ankles have edema. He is constantly scratching them and they have sores on them and little bumps. He has started weezing badly and has had a cold for months. He still seems to eat good, but not things that are good for him. He only eats meat and pasta and he loves milk. No fruits and vegies. He never has slept very well and he's been complaining lately he's exhausted. However, he still works full time in the sun and is a pipe foreman. So far it hasn't affected his job. He recently got a great review and a raise. He says if I was so sick, he couldn't do all I do. Also, he has very weird mood swings. For example he actually cried twice the night before last. For him that is weird...He went from joking, to being mean, to crying and back to laughing. I'm having a hard time with this..... I feel I am walking on eggshells.
I wish I knew more about what is going on inside of him. But he refuses to go back to the doctor. He does not have varices yet. But he was diagnosed with acid reflux disease 3 years ago. He is not taking anything for it now, as he says he doesn't have heartburn. I would think that would be a sign of varices??? do you now???? Besides what happens if that goes untreated?
I am at a complete blank. He knows I go on this site and I have researched this a lot. I don't want to watch him die, but I feel I'm already doing that....
I only wish I knew what happens next and how long I have with him....
I really am grateful for people like you. My heart and mind are shot.
Thanks for listening. If you have anything you can help me with, I could use it. I am just flat out beat up over this.
Thanks for your time. Michelle
Michael600
05-01-2008, 04:06 AM
Michelle, my heart goes out to you, and to the others who have posted comments here about their struggles with the effects of this devastating disease on their families and themselves.
I have some personal experience with this myself, but I'll save that for another time. Right now the important thing is to get your husband to stop drinking any way you can. That's your mission. Whatever you have to do, I think you should do it.
All the symptoms and complications you are wondering about will only get worse if he doesn't stop drinking. Maybe even if he does. The liver is such an important organ, and if it stops functioning properly, so does the whole body. Anything is possible - even seizures. It affects every system in the body.
I have heard that in some cases where the patient stopped drinking, the liver actually improved. I'm sceptical about that, because my understanding is that once the liver cells are destroyed they don't grow back.
So how are we going to get your husband to stop drinking?
Well, first of all, he will never do it if he does not have a firm desire to. You say he uses every argument in the book to not quit. I'm just wondering - what possible argument can there be to keep on drinking when you KNOW it is going to kill you?
It seems like there is every argument in the book to STOP drinking. I think you should write every one of those arguments down (I'd be happy to help you), and then ask him if you two can set aside some time to calmly talk about his disease. Then explain your concerns just like you have explained them here, and go over your list with him. Give him a chance to talk too, but tell him it has to be a calm and serious discussion.
I'm going to stop here because last night I typed you a long reply and then I went to another website to look something up for you and I lost everything I had written. By that time I was too tired to try and write it again. I'll post again. Meanwhile, think about what I have said and if it helps any, great. If not, I have plenty more suggestions :)
I sure wish you the best.
Michael
I have some personal experience with this myself, but I'll save that for another time. Right now the important thing is to get your husband to stop drinking any way you can. That's your mission. Whatever you have to do, I think you should do it.
All the symptoms and complications you are wondering about will only get worse if he doesn't stop drinking. Maybe even if he does. The liver is such an important organ, and if it stops functioning properly, so does the whole body. Anything is possible - even seizures. It affects every system in the body.
I have heard that in some cases where the patient stopped drinking, the liver actually improved. I'm sceptical about that, because my understanding is that once the liver cells are destroyed they don't grow back.
So how are we going to get your husband to stop drinking?
Well, first of all, he will never do it if he does not have a firm desire to. You say he uses every argument in the book to not quit. I'm just wondering - what possible argument can there be to keep on drinking when you KNOW it is going to kill you?
It seems like there is every argument in the book to STOP drinking. I think you should write every one of those arguments down (I'd be happy to help you), and then ask him if you two can set aside some time to calmly talk about his disease. Then explain your concerns just like you have explained them here, and go over your list with him. Give him a chance to talk too, but tell him it has to be a calm and serious discussion.
I'm going to stop here because last night I typed you a long reply and then I went to another website to look something up for you and I lost everything I had written. By that time I was too tired to try and write it again. I'll post again. Meanwhile, think about what I have said and if it helps any, great. If not, I have plenty more suggestions :)
I sure wish you the best.
Michael
iluvwv
05-02-2008, 06:10 PM
Hi Michael. I was waiting on Michelle to reply first, but she hasn't yet. That's really good advise you gave there. I wish so bad that I could have got my husband to quit drinking back in 2000 when he found out he had cirrhosis. he didn't quit until last year and now i'm praying he will get a liver transplant really soon.
I'm ready to hear your story.
I'm ready to hear your story.
michelle991
05-03-2008, 05:05 PM
Hi, It's me. I am having no luck....He just doesn't seem to want to quit drinking or go back to the doctors. He claimed he didn't drink yesterday but I could smell it on his breath. He didn't deny it when I said something either. Yet he did get irritated rather quickly, so I let it go...I don't want to fight. His feet are getting so swollen, I don't know how he can stand it. And there are sores on them from him scratching. They look like they are black and blue....He also is getting, what looks like pimples all over his chest. He has never had anything like this before. He has a really dark tan from working outside so the little veins I used to see are faded in . Also he is french so his skin color is on the olive side. He still denies that his stomach is from the cirrhosis. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to tell!!!! He gained 35-40 pounds in the last year - all in his stomach.... He also says his problem urinating is due to the fact he is tired. I say BS... I told him his father is 80 and he can go pee just fine. My biggest concern is his memory. In the last week 3 times he told me something (all different things) and then he denies ever saying it.... I am not nuts and I DON'T DRINK.... What the hell is this all about???? I am really at wits end...Mood swings too..From I love you to - he's mad - to crying.. I am living on a roller coaster ride.... Please Help! I had only ever seen him cry once before and that was over a death....Anything you all could tell me would be helpful..Are the pimple like things related?What about the mood swings??? How long did the swelling go on in your husband until he couldn't walk...I am such a mess...Whats next.................................... .......Help
Michael600
05-04-2008, 09:47 PM
Thanks, iluvwv, but I don't know how good my advice is. I'm great at giving advice but not necessarily at following it. I just wish I could help these guys quit drinking because I know how hard it is. That's great that your husband finally quit - how did he do it? I know that a person who is addicted will never quit until they are convinced that they must, and sometimes not even then, as the wives and others posting here know.
A great book I would recommend for Michelle or anyone else is "Allen Carr's Easy Way To Control Alcohol". Don't let the title fool you (but do let it fool your hubby) - the book pretends to be for somebody who thinks they might have a drinking problem, but then it leads the reader to the conclusion that the only way to "control alcohol" is to quit completely, and the reason we don't is because we are afraid of what life will be like without it. But the book shows how life will only be better without alcohol, and once you see that, quitting is "easy" because the withdrawal isn't really that bad if your mind is clear. So, Michelle, you could give the book to your husband and let him think it is about just cutting down on drinking, and then he will read it and hopefully be convinced that he needs to stop altogether.
Of course, I realize from what you have said that it's not likely that your husband is going to be willing to read a book about alcohol, but at this point anything is worth a try. He says it's like going over a cliff because if you don't know it's coming it's not so bad. Well, the fallacy with that thinking is that he DOES know it's coming, he's just not facing it. It's more like knowing there is a cliff in front of you, and then driving blindfolded so you don't know exactly when you are going to go over it. But it's coming.
He also says that if he was so sick he couldn't still do his job so well. OK, and it's great that he got a raise, but ask him: is he going to wait until he CAN'T still do it? Or is he going to keep denying it until it's too late?
The name of your thread says it all - he is in denial. That's the worst part, because as long as he denies what is happening, it will keep happening. Even if he admits it, it will still be a struggle, but at least there will be hope. My prayers are with you.
As for my story, I'll get to that after the break. But it's nothing compared to the others here.
Michael
A great book I would recommend for Michelle or anyone else is "Allen Carr's Easy Way To Control Alcohol". Don't let the title fool you (but do let it fool your hubby) - the book pretends to be for somebody who thinks they might have a drinking problem, but then it leads the reader to the conclusion that the only way to "control alcohol" is to quit completely, and the reason we don't is because we are afraid of what life will be like without it. But the book shows how life will only be better without alcohol, and once you see that, quitting is "easy" because the withdrawal isn't really that bad if your mind is clear. So, Michelle, you could give the book to your husband and let him think it is about just cutting down on drinking, and then he will read it and hopefully be convinced that he needs to stop altogether.
Of course, I realize from what you have said that it's not likely that your husband is going to be willing to read a book about alcohol, but at this point anything is worth a try. He says it's like going over a cliff because if you don't know it's coming it's not so bad. Well, the fallacy with that thinking is that he DOES know it's coming, he's just not facing it. It's more like knowing there is a cliff in front of you, and then driving blindfolded so you don't know exactly when you are going to go over it. But it's coming.
He also says that if he was so sick he couldn't still do his job so well. OK, and it's great that he got a raise, but ask him: is he going to wait until he CAN'T still do it? Or is he going to keep denying it until it's too late?
The name of your thread says it all - he is in denial. That's the worst part, because as long as he denies what is happening, it will keep happening. Even if he admits it, it will still be a struggle, but at least there will be hope. My prayers are with you.
As for my story, I'll get to that after the break. But it's nothing compared to the others here.
Michael
Michael600
05-05-2008, 01:24 AM
Well, I better get to bed soon since I have to go in tomorrow for a CT scan to see if I have any liver tumors, because a hepatitis test my doctor did had some indicator for possible tumors. I was diagnosed with stage 4 cirrhosis in January and am currently struggling to quit drinking. I haven't suffered anywhere near the symptoms yet that I have read about here, but I do know that any more drinking will just kill me faster. My problem is that I haven't succeeded in quitting yet. If this scan shows tumors, though, I don't know how much time I will have anyway.
So wish me luck. I'll let you know how it turns out.
Michael
So wish me luck. I'll let you know how it turns out.
Michael
gss2003
05-05-2008, 06:43 AM
Well, I better get to bed soon since I have to go in tomorrow for a CT scan to see if I have any liver tumors, because a hepatitis test my doctor did had some indicator for possible tumors. I was diagnosed with stage 4 cirrhosis in January and am currently struggling to quit drinking. I haven't suffered anywhere near the symptoms yet that I have read about here, but I do know that any more drinking will just kill me faster. My problem is that I haven't succeeded in quitting yet. If this scan shows tumors, though, I don't know how much time I will have anyway.
So wish me luck. I'll let you know how it turns out.
Michael
It's not too late to stop drinking. In fact, more reason as it will open up more treatment options.
I have a 4 year old son too & 6 year old daughter. The minute I thought I had alch cirrh I quit immediately.
So wish me luck. I'll let you know how it turns out.
Michael
It's not too late to stop drinking. In fact, more reason as it will open up more treatment options.
I have a 4 year old son too & 6 year old daughter. The minute I thought I had alch cirrh I quit immediately.
iluvwv
05-05-2008, 05:12 PM
Michael... I pray that you don't have tumors and if you do that it can be treated.
My hubby only drank beer, hardly ever anything stronger. but he drank a lot of beer. he just got so sick, i guess that's how he quit. they told him the only chance he had was a liver transplant and he had to quit drinking for 6 months to get an evaluation. that is when he quit. but i'm not sure if he is going to make it to a transplant or not. he's pretty bad.
Let us know how your your scan went. Good luck.
My hubby only drank beer, hardly ever anything stronger. but he drank a lot of beer. he just got so sick, i guess that's how he quit. they told him the only chance he had was a liver transplant and he had to quit drinking for 6 months to get an evaluation. that is when he quit. but i'm not sure if he is going to make it to a transplant or not. he's pretty bad.
Let us know how your your scan went. Good luck.
Michael600
05-06-2008, 04:34 AM
Thanks so much. I always thought it was the smoking that would kill me so I was kind of surprised when I had a checkup last fall and my doc felt around in the liver area (knowing that I drank alcohol) and told me that if I quit only one of the two, it should be drinking because it would kill me faster. From there I went to the gastroenterologist who did ultrasound, mri, and finally biopsy before diagnosing the cirrhosis. Guess my doc was right, just a little too late.
I should hear from the gastroenterologist tomorrow or the next day, but judging from his past performance, I will have to call him. I didn't hear from him after the biopsy and I found out the results from my cardiologist when I went in for a checkup and I mentioned it. He went into the hospital computer and came back in 5 minutes with the news. Then when I called my gastro guy, he claimed he hadn't seen the results but he called me back in 5 minutes after he "got them sent over". So a friend with liver problems has recommended her doctor and I'll try to see him.
Meanwhile I will wait for the results of the scan. I always knew I was abusing my body but it held up pretty well until now, so it was a bit of a shock to find out I have cirrhosis. It just goes to show that you can only push your luck for so long.
I wonder where Michelle is and how she and her husband are doing. I hope she's ok. I wish you and wv all the best too. I'll pray for that liver transplant for him.
Michael
I should hear from the gastroenterologist tomorrow or the next day, but judging from his past performance, I will have to call him. I didn't hear from him after the biopsy and I found out the results from my cardiologist when I went in for a checkup and I mentioned it. He went into the hospital computer and came back in 5 minutes with the news. Then when I called my gastro guy, he claimed he hadn't seen the results but he called me back in 5 minutes after he "got them sent over". So a friend with liver problems has recommended her doctor and I'll try to see him.
Meanwhile I will wait for the results of the scan. I always knew I was abusing my body but it held up pretty well until now, so it was a bit of a shock to find out I have cirrhosis. It just goes to show that you can only push your luck for so long.
I wonder where Michelle is and how she and her husband are doing. I hope she's ok. I wish you and wv all the best too. I'll pray for that liver transplant for him.
Michael
gss2003
05-06-2008, 06:17 AM
When you said they did an ultrasound, mri and then biopsy -- did the ultrasound and mri not show cirrhosis or were inconclusive?
Were you labs normal too?
Were you labs normal too?
michelle991
05-06-2008, 09:26 AM
Hi Michael, I had no idea you also had these problems. Keep in mind my husbands been living with hep c and cirrhosis going on 10 years. He went to the doctors about once a year until 3 years ago. They told him if he didn't stop drinking he would be dead in 5 years. Well, he pretty much quit the first year when he did interferon treatments but then they didn't help and he went right back to drinking. Then 3 years ago the doctor told him he had gotton worse and that keeping on with his pace he'd be lucky to live a couple more years. He really didn't start to show all these signs until about a year ago. It's been a slow progression in his case. I've heard horror stories on the ascites and he started retaining water a little over a year ago. He's now gained a total of 40-45 pounds and he doesn't hardly eat anything like he used to. Also his diet is horrible...He won't eat fruits or vegies.
I guess what I am saying is, if you quit now you have a good chance of living a full life. You need to surround yourself with others who don't drink. Buy an AA big Book. I have read the whole thing and it really has some great stuff in it. You never say I quit forever, you do it one day at a time. I have learned that drinking is a bad habit and your mind will talk you into doing it again and again if you let it. There is a book by Joyce Meyers called "Battle Field of the Mind". Old habits are the worst thing to break, but we can if we choose to!! I don't know if you believe in God but this is a powerful book. You would be surprised what you can do if you really want to. It's a disease of the mind.....
Anyway, nothing has changed on my end. I am just grateful he's been pretty stable (mood wise) the last few days. Each day I just say a prayer, I have just about given up on the hope he will quit drinking. I only think he will when he really gets sick and is unable to do what he is doing now. Then it might be too late....Only God knows
I am praying for you Michael.....
I guess what I am saying is, if you quit now you have a good chance of living a full life. You need to surround yourself with others who don't drink. Buy an AA big Book. I have read the whole thing and it really has some great stuff in it. You never say I quit forever, you do it one day at a time. I have learned that drinking is a bad habit and your mind will talk you into doing it again and again if you let it. There is a book by Joyce Meyers called "Battle Field of the Mind". Old habits are the worst thing to break, but we can if we choose to!! I don't know if you believe in God but this is a powerful book. You would be surprised what you can do if you really want to. It's a disease of the mind.....
Anyway, nothing has changed on my end. I am just grateful he's been pretty stable (mood wise) the last few days. Each day I just say a prayer, I have just about given up on the hope he will quit drinking. I only think he will when he really gets sick and is unable to do what he is doing now. Then it might be too late....Only God knows
I am praying for you Michael.....
iluvwv
05-06-2008, 06:34 PM
Michael....what is your age? hope that's ok to ask. be sure and let us know as soon as you get your results, we'll be waiting.
Michelle....how are you? hope you had a good day. my hubby seems to be feeling a little better today. you just never know, day to day what's going to happen next. my worst fear is that he won't get a liver transplant. my 2nd worst fear is that he will drink again if he gets better. keep in touch.
Michelle....how are you? hope you had a good day. my hubby seems to be feeling a little better today. you just never know, day to day what's going to happen next. my worst fear is that he won't get a liver transplant. my 2nd worst fear is that he will drink again if he gets better. keep in touch.
Michael600
05-07-2008, 05:23 AM
I'm 57 (ugh). Don't feel a day over 60.
I've been drinking and smoking for forty years.
I haven't spoken to the doc yet about the CT scan yesterday but if I don't hear from him tomorrow I'll give him a call.
Let's see..my blood tests from the first checkup showed elevated liver enzymes, so they ordered the ultrasound and mri. I had them both done on the same day. I actually thought it was a CT scan that they did that time, but when the doc ordered this CT scan I said I thought that's what I had and he said that was something else, mri I think. Anyway, the ultrasound showed inflammation and I think the scan showed scarring, but those tests didn't confirm cirrhosis, so I had the biopsy three weeks later and that made it official. Then when I went in for a follow up the doc tested to see if I had ever been vaccinated for hepatitis and that's when he noticed some reading for tumors.
I also had an ultrasound about two years ago when I had similar results on some blood tests. Supposedly that ultrasound didn't show anything abnormal.
I've always had some weird results on tests, such as high triglycerides, low HDL, high white blood cells, etc. Everything has always checked out ok, even the chest xrays I have done once a year. But I noticed some things that, looking back, were probably signs of liver damage. For example, a red sort of rash like a permanent sunburn on my chest and upper arms. I asked two dermatologists about it (see, I like to get check everything out) and they just said it was from the sun (I live in Florida). Also spidery veins on my legs around the knees and ankles. Nobody ever suggested they had anything to do with the liver, but maybe they do?
Thanks for the advice, Michelle. I do know I have to quit drinking. With me it's always like, welp, I'm gonna start tomorrow for sure. A friend of mine is trying to get me to go to AA, but I actually wonder if maybe rehab for a couple of weeks might be a better idea. What do you think?
When I first found out, I asked the doc what is the prognosis. He said, well if you quit drinking the prognosis is good; if you don't, five years down the road you may start to have complications. He's probably too optimistic. But that fits in with the time frame with your husband. Believe me though, I don't plan to test the theory.
If you want to hear a funny story (kind of), the thing is, my health insurance was due to expire so that's why I had all these tests done while I still had insurance to pay for them. Wouldn't you know, that's when they find something. So then I had to sweat out getting insurance even more because now I had a preexisting condition. Well, long story short, thanks to some regulation the insurance companies are required to comply with, I was able to get insurance, and it covers preexisting conditions. It costs almost a thousand a month but it's worth it.
Sorry to go on and on, but it's nice to be able to talk about it and hear other people talk about it. I especially liked that comment Jayne made a while back about how men are like kids. So true. I might add that women are like mothers, and where would we kids be without them?
I've been drinking and smoking for forty years.
I haven't spoken to the doc yet about the CT scan yesterday but if I don't hear from him tomorrow I'll give him a call.
Let's see..my blood tests from the first checkup showed elevated liver enzymes, so they ordered the ultrasound and mri. I had them both done on the same day. I actually thought it was a CT scan that they did that time, but when the doc ordered this CT scan I said I thought that's what I had and he said that was something else, mri I think. Anyway, the ultrasound showed inflammation and I think the scan showed scarring, but those tests didn't confirm cirrhosis, so I had the biopsy three weeks later and that made it official. Then when I went in for a follow up the doc tested to see if I had ever been vaccinated for hepatitis and that's when he noticed some reading for tumors.
I also had an ultrasound about two years ago when I had similar results on some blood tests. Supposedly that ultrasound didn't show anything abnormal.
I've always had some weird results on tests, such as high triglycerides, low HDL, high white blood cells, etc. Everything has always checked out ok, even the chest xrays I have done once a year. But I noticed some things that, looking back, were probably signs of liver damage. For example, a red sort of rash like a permanent sunburn on my chest and upper arms. I asked two dermatologists about it (see, I like to get check everything out) and they just said it was from the sun (I live in Florida). Also spidery veins on my legs around the knees and ankles. Nobody ever suggested they had anything to do with the liver, but maybe they do?
Thanks for the advice, Michelle. I do know I have to quit drinking. With me it's always like, welp, I'm gonna start tomorrow for sure. A friend of mine is trying to get me to go to AA, but I actually wonder if maybe rehab for a couple of weeks might be a better idea. What do you think?
When I first found out, I asked the doc what is the prognosis. He said, well if you quit drinking the prognosis is good; if you don't, five years down the road you may start to have complications. He's probably too optimistic. But that fits in with the time frame with your husband. Believe me though, I don't plan to test the theory.
If you want to hear a funny story (kind of), the thing is, my health insurance was due to expire so that's why I had all these tests done while I still had insurance to pay for them. Wouldn't you know, that's when they find something. So then I had to sweat out getting insurance even more because now I had a preexisting condition. Well, long story short, thanks to some regulation the insurance companies are required to comply with, I was able to get insurance, and it covers preexisting conditions. It costs almost a thousand a month but it's worth it.
Sorry to go on and on, but it's nice to be able to talk about it and hear other people talk about it. I especially liked that comment Jayne made a while back about how men are like kids. So true. I might add that women are like mothers, and where would we kids be without them?
gss2003
05-07-2008, 07:45 AM
Michael,
How much are you drinking/daily and what?
I wouldn't push your luck. Best course of action is to quit. Easier said than done. But just do it. Have the will power. Gets easier. I drank beer almost daily for probably 12 years and then (believe it or not), when the Atkins craze came around and the idea was to avoid carbs I got into Whiskey. I had a fatty liver scare and then doing research on the internet convinced myself (stupidly) that I could protect my liver via supplements while continuing to drink heavy.
When I thought I had serious damage I just quit immediately. And now, 2+ years later I miss the social component at times. But don't really have a desire.
How much are you drinking/daily and what?
I wouldn't push your luck. Best course of action is to quit. Easier said than done. But just do it. Have the will power. Gets easier. I drank beer almost daily for probably 12 years and then (believe it or not), when the Atkins craze came around and the idea was to avoid carbs I got into Whiskey. I had a fatty liver scare and then doing research on the internet convinced myself (stupidly) that I could protect my liver via supplements while continuing to drink heavy.
When I thought I had serious damage I just quit immediately. And now, 2+ years later I miss the social component at times. But don't really have a desire.
iluvwv
05-09-2008, 06:53 PM
Michael... any news?
Can't help but ask, it's the 'mother' in us.
Can't help but ask, it's the 'mother' in us.
Michael600
05-11-2008, 03:58 AM
Hey there,
Sorry to leave you hanging. I heard from my doctor on Wednesday, but then I had some computer issues and such.
So anyway...no tumors. Well actually I guess there is a growth on my adrenal gland but he says it's benign. I have to go in every six months for an ultrasound to check on things. And quit drinking, of course.
I'm doing better with that but I still have a long way to go. The doctor said it will help me "get better". I don't know about that. Basically stage 4 cirrhosis means your entire liver is scarred so I don't know how that will get better. My doctor is not too informative so I'm going to try out that other guy and see what he has to say about treatments, etc.
Thanks for your interest. How is your husband doing, iluvwv? If you feel like sharing more about how they decided he needs a liver transplant, I would like very much to hear about it. And of course please keep us posted on his progress.
One more thing: Happy Mother's Day!
Michael
Sorry to leave you hanging. I heard from my doctor on Wednesday, but then I had some computer issues and such.
So anyway...no tumors. Well actually I guess there is a growth on my adrenal gland but he says it's benign. I have to go in every six months for an ultrasound to check on things. And quit drinking, of course.
I'm doing better with that but I still have a long way to go. The doctor said it will help me "get better". I don't know about that. Basically stage 4 cirrhosis means your entire liver is scarred so I don't know how that will get better. My doctor is not too informative so I'm going to try out that other guy and see what he has to say about treatments, etc.
Thanks for your interest. How is your husband doing, iluvwv? If you feel like sharing more about how they decided he needs a liver transplant, I would like very much to hear about it. And of course please keep us posted on his progress.
One more thing: Happy Mother's Day!
Michael
Michael600
05-11-2008, 04:31 AM
iluvwv, I was just reading your posts on some other threads and I think I got the story. Sorry for being so clueless.
God Bless You
God Bless You
iluvwv
05-11-2008, 09:52 AM
michael, i am so glad there are no tumors.
i felt the same way about this end stage cirrohis. i swear, my husband looks so much better this morning. if he could just stay the way he is right now everything would be fine. but i know thats not going to happen. i am scared to death about this transplant thing.
i still think that if he had quit drinking when he knew about the problem that he would not be in this shape. i'm trying to learn to get over this resentment i feel and be more patient with him.
i quit drinking when i found out he had cirrohis. i refused to touch it, hoping it would help him. he quit 7 years after I did. his friends would talk him in to drinking and i would raise cain, i told them a true friend would encourage him to stop. needless to say, they don't come around when he's sick cause that's what a true friend would do. i still went out and stuff and didn't drink. it was very hard to get around everyone drinking and me not. it got on my nerves, but i learned to loosen up and have fun without drinking. found out i could dance pretty good when i wasn't drunk. found out life was pretty good when i wasn't drunk.
i wish you all the luck in quitting and ask that you keep in touch. i didn't have much luck with helping my hubby quit but hope that you will quit before you get in his shape.
i felt the same way about this end stage cirrohis. i swear, my husband looks so much better this morning. if he could just stay the way he is right now everything would be fine. but i know thats not going to happen. i am scared to death about this transplant thing.
i still think that if he had quit drinking when he knew about the problem that he would not be in this shape. i'm trying to learn to get over this resentment i feel and be more patient with him.
i quit drinking when i found out he had cirrohis. i refused to touch it, hoping it would help him. he quit 7 years after I did. his friends would talk him in to drinking and i would raise cain, i told them a true friend would encourage him to stop. needless to say, they don't come around when he's sick cause that's what a true friend would do. i still went out and stuff and didn't drink. it was very hard to get around everyone drinking and me not. it got on my nerves, but i learned to loosen up and have fun without drinking. found out i could dance pretty good when i wasn't drunk. found out life was pretty good when i wasn't drunk.
i wish you all the luck in quitting and ask that you keep in touch. i didn't have much luck with helping my hubby quit but hope that you will quit before you get in his shape.