Hi Julie,
You sure are going through a lot and im sorry for it. Really dont know how much advise i can offer. your medical problems are awful. The state you live in is gorgeous but probably deadly on your body with all it goes through. I went to college in Wisconsin and i know it snowed almost everyday. Its a long winter, a short spring where everything was melting and even a shorter summer because it can start snowing sometimes in August, beginning of Sept. Of course i was at the top of the state, so im not sure if it was worse up there but man oh man the weather sure can be brutal, so thats not helping.

I know its hard on you but bankruptcy is kinda the norm for people now a days and although im sure you and your husband are thinking this is the end of the world its not, you didnt ask for this and its not your fault. Try not to blame yourself. If you guys really love one another you will get through this. Some friends of ours just went through bankruptcy and you would never had thought it, they both made decent money but over extended themselves!
They were embarrassed by it but hey it happens ! I know thats not the reason it happened to you but that part of it will iron itself out.

You should be able to get medicare for your scripts, but just in case when things go wrong in that area, remember they are tax deductable and so are the out of pocket cost for Doctors up to a standard deduction. If you paid for medical insurance last year, plus scripts and doctors. You may be entitled to that, its usually between eight to ten thousand. We always were able to have that deduction, so if you havent done your taxes yet, see if that can help for now. Not sure what it is for this year but look into it and see if you can qualify. I was also laid off in May and lost my insurance so we didnt qualify this year because of the loss and blessedly not having to see a Doctor that often or be on meds. I wanted to be off them for awhile anyway, so even while i was still working I went the vitamin route but thats not enough for flair ups.

You and your daughter can find things to do together even if your in bed, perhaps she can do drawings, arts and crafts, watch movies together. (Those you can get free from the local library) Remember where there is a will there is a way, you can look them up on the computer once you have a library card and perhaps, you can get books on tape, she can read to you, might make her feel better. But i know she's getting at that age also, so just talk with her and explain you have to do things this way for now. Youngins are usually more understanding when they know mommys just not feeling well. Even if its only an hr. its still quality time.

I know this is not the way you wanted to start your marriage but what doesnt kill us makes us stronger and the power of prayer can be remarkable. One time i was really really sick and out of the blue i found myself starting to feel better but couldnt understand why, come to find out the church had me on their pray list and prayed for me every week. I had no way to know that until the pastor who visited often came over and we were talking about it and he told me. Even the Ladies guild were praying for me at the meetings and it was one of my little miracles. Now if you dont believe, maybe you should give it a try. At this point couldnt hurt, im not trying to preach and things dont happen overnight but I have had quite a few miracles in my life and though you may feel, it will never happened to you, it wouldnt hurt. Joel Olsteen, i think im spelling his last name correctly has some really good books, you can probably find at the library and he has a T.V. show also but i prefer the books vs. a half hr. show. My mom always said "God helps those who help themselves" and your doing that as much as you can, by filing the bankruptcy and filing for welfare, your helping yourself in that way. Thats a good start. Your trying, so give yourself some credit. Be somewhat positive, anything is better than nothing.

Hopefully your husband will come to understand in time but as you have heard a lot of us say, they didnt understand at first, and remember men are just different in their way of thinking. They dont like to talk about things and they find ways to deal with it, that doesnt include us. Computers, games, staying away and doing things outside. Every once in awhile my husband says i just need to go blow off some steam and i let him go, as long as its not a lot and he always thanks me the next day. I give him a kiss and say i understand, just dont make it a habit........... I dont care who you are marriage is a lot of work for anyone, even if you have the best husband, people have problems that tends to stress the marriage, but if you can get through this together, you will start to feel that your both doing something for one another and it starts to make sense. Compassion towards one another goes a long way and even if your sick, its good to give him compassion also. Just tell him i understand how you feel but unfortunatly this is the way it is for now, we just need to get through it. Sometimes it takes an awfully long time to get a break through to a man but its not impossible.

Welfare, well im sure thats not a good feeling either but hey your truely in need and in a small way be glad you can get the help. We all know there are people out there that abuse the system. Im orginally from New Jersey where people would shop with welfare stamps (as they were back then) buying the most expensive steaks and lobster, that outraged us, they would have pools and cadillacs in the drive way. I could never afford that and i wasnt even on welfare.

Dont ever worry about writing a long post, just vent and get it off your chest. Geez look at the mini book i just wrote you. I tried to cover all the basis that i could remember from your post and i read it a few times because i knew i couldnt go back and look at it as i was writing this. I just remember i forgot one thing about your meds. Dont give up, we all had to try different ones until we found what worked for us. You can look on line and find out about meds, what they are for, and what is in them, What they can do for for you. Iv had some bad reactions so If your up to it do some homework on your own. Always ask for samples, thats why they are given to the Doctors. I believe Lyrica is for the nerves, sounds like you may need to take a muscle relaxer along with it. Take it one step at a time. Cross each bridge as you cross it, try to keep the stress off you cause that makes things worse. Good luck, i will continue to keep you in my prayers and for now im sending you some :angel: :angel: :angel: :angel: to watch over you. Take care of yourself for now and try to have a good day. Keep that pretty smile on your face or put it back on there, cause thats where it belongs and laughing is the best medicine sometimes, so i goof on myself a lot ;)