does anyone have outbreaks with no pain, just general itching in the scrotum area (not neccessarily where the sore is). does anyone have outbreaks with lesions that don't have a waterfilled blister? has anyone ever had one outbreak than never had anymore? has anyone had a first outbreak that didn't hurt and then following ones did? also has anyone heard of a supplement called Monolaurin? thanks!

Hi TG,

Herpes can take on all kinds of different variations of symptoms, including simply redness of the skin, a rash, tiny breaks in the skin, etc., as well as the classic blisters. In addition, some people (most, actually) never get visible symptoms, although some might get sensory symptoms (tingling, itching, pain or burning; or swollen lymph nodes and a flu-ish feeling).

Yes, it's possible to have one outbreak and then none after that (or none for a long time after that). You would still have herpes regardless of whether you get symptoms or not, though, and could still be contagious. Unfortunately, we don't always know when those contagious times are (even those of us who get regular OBs). That's the tricky part about herpes.

Yes, I've heard of Monolaurin, although I've never tried it personally. I believe it has worked well for some people, but different people seem to respond differently to different products, so it's not a guarantee that it will work for a particular person.

Hope that helps!

TheOneInFour

tyler
hi there i would be new as well. i have to say from my experience with this virus ( which has not been that long ) that it all depends on what my stress level is like as far as the ob's go. i can say that i now know the signs of an oncomming ob, so i start to take medicine for it. with my first ob i was not sure what it was and i thought that it would go away, so i waited. boy i can tell you that was the wrong thing to do. i ended up having problems going to the bathroom due to the sores. i did end up going to the doctor to find out what it was, i just new something was not right. i am working on keeping my stres level normal so that i do not have anymore ob's. i hope that this helps you.

tylergibson,

Unfortunately, if you read the info out on the Internet you're going to find that about any type of skin irritation in the "boxer shorts" region could be herpes. A scratch, sore, rash, pimple, you name it...

You're getting some good information here, but remember that a diagnosis over the Internet simply isn't possible. Especially for something as vague as herpes. That's like trying to diagnose Parkinson's over the Internet. Is it possible that you have herpes? Absolutely. Could it be something entierly different and end up bing nothing to be worried about? Absolutely.

Go to the doctor, get it checked out and get some testing done. That's about all you can do. Chances are they'll tell you "it's not herpes", and chances are they'll be right. However, since you're not having classic sx's you'll need to get some testing done to be sure.

I'm in the same boat and it stinks to be sure. Hang in there...

Okay..okay...I should haved prefaced my response by saying that "in the event you have not yet been diagnosed (dx'd) with herpes you should..."

However, if you have been dx'd, I apologize and feel free to call me an idiot.

That is all...

no havent been diagnosed yet with it..but my head keeps saying i have it http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/frown.gif ive had 3 lesions basically, all at seperate times..and ive only been able to show one to a dr, he said it was folliculitis, it was in my pubic area..though i had one thing near the head of penis which im scared was something more serious..so i had a antigen blood test done and am waiting for the results..but I am still taking a crap load of supplements in preperation for the worst..Does anyone here think that the supplements designed for fighting herpes works even while herpes is dormant, or is it too hidden away at that time to touch it?thanks

I think the bottom line is you're just going to have to wait this out till you get conclusive results from a blood test. (I know...I know...waiting sucks, I'm in that same boat.)

I know it's hard, but try to remain positive. You did go see a doctor and he/she is a doctor for a reason - give them a little credit for knowing more than you about diseases. Also, it's not like you walked in and he/she said "ooohhh...I know what that is...let's get you going on some Valtrex asap."

You may have herpes but you may not. Try to give both sides of the equation some time instead of focusing on only the herpes side.

Well, I'm certainly no expert but based upon my understanding the technical answer would be yes, it might be a herpedic lesion. That said an Internet diagnosis isn't even remotely possible. Take everyting here with a grain of salt because we're all colored by our own experiences and we're not doctors.

It certianly doesn't sound like classic herpes and most doctors would probably tell you that it's not herpes unless it appears, blisters and then crusts over. That said, they will probably do some testing (which they should) since it's a concern.

Who knows what it is...maybe it's some sort of sun damage...I've got a spot on my nose that gets rough and peels off only to reappear again at a later time. It's from a sunburn. That's only one small example of what it might be other than herpes. Probably the best bet would be to go to a dermatologist; there's a reason why there are doctors who specialize only in skin conditions (it's damn complex).

Bottom line is the only way to know is to be tested. My understanding is that one of the newer blood tests would be conclusive (or as close to it as you can get) after 4 months and would differtiate between types I and II.

Good luck.

Patty,

I've known guys like the one you're describing and, although I've called a couple of them my friends, I wouldn't set them up on a date with my sister. I think you've got a big fat red light based upon his refusal to get tested. The thinking goes like this (and it's pretty much limited to guys). "It's nothing that's going to kill me and if it does I don't want to know about it till after I'm dead." It's a state of denial and a desire to keep the status quo. He doesn't want to know that anything's wrong in his little paradise where he gets to screw all the girls he wants to (probably a fare share without a condom). They can be fun guys, but use a condom or you're really rolling the dice. Not to scare you but there's bigger fish in the STD sea than herpes (i.e., HIV).

Now, that said, here's what I'd do if I were you. If you want to stay with this guy and you're not using a condom start doing so. Here's why, you're basically concerned about being infected and are curious about how long it might take before you're infected (or when symptoms show up). So, short of not having sex with this guy, it's going to be challenging to be able to establish a baseline since there's always going to be a 4 month window that will be constantly sliding forward with each sex act.

If you do start using condoms and avoid sex when he's looking contagious (i.e., having an outbreak of whatever he's got) you've reduced your risk as much as you can short of not having sex with him. After four months have passed go get tested for herpes (and whatever else you are concerned about). That should provide you with some assurance. It won't be total assuance unless you don't have sex with him for 4 months and then go get tested. BTW, tested = one of the newer blood test that differntiate between types I&II and if there's been a recent exposure.

Make sense?

Good luck with it all. http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/cool.gif

Patty,

Sorry, I got a bit long winded and didn't answer your question directly. The answer to your question is yes you could have herpes indefinately and have it never manifest itself as a lesion or the like. Apparently the majority of herpes carriers are not aware they have it. Oh the things a person learns after the fact...

That is why the blood testing is important.

Hi Patty,

I agree with ToughSpot on pretty much everything he's written. It should be a big red warning light when someone is unwilling to get tested. I hate to say it but if he isn't capable of respecting you enough to even find out (never mind take precautions), he's likely to be disrespectful to you in other ways too. It's your choice of course, but you might want to consider whether it's worth the risk of getting a chronic STD for someone with those kinds of priorities.

Having said that, it's not a typical placement for a herpes outbreak...not to say it couldn't be herpes but it doesn't sound like the first diagnosis that comes to mind. However, if whatever he has is contagious, any skin-to-skin contact with the sore will put you at risk. It could take one time, it could take several times, or you might never get it, but do you really want to take that risk just to be with this person? That's the question you need to ask yourself.

If it *is* herpes and if you catch it from him, symptoms take at least 2 days to show up after initial infection, but could take weeks, months, years or never. However, even without symptoms you (and he) can still be contagious; it's less likely but still happens.

Although using a condom is definitely a good idea (esp. with someone who thinks testing is unnecessary) it won't protect you from skin-to-skin contact with any skin outside the condom area. So it would do little to protect you from herpes if that's what he's got around his navel. I don't know exactly where the dermatomes begin and end but I wonder if above the navel might be in a different dermatome (area of skin served by the same nerve complex) from the genital area anyway, in which case a condom would offer even less protection from whatever he's got.

Good luck Patty. I really want to encourage you to think twice before risking your health for someone who would not respect your right to know what you're letting yourself in for. Keep us posted how you make out with this.

TheOneInFour

[This message has been screwed up by moderator1 (edited 03-20-2003).]

[This message has been edited by daisymiller (edited 03-20-2003).]

Hey Patty,

I want to challenge a few things you've mentioned, but I also want to support you following your instincts about what is in your own best interests right now.

Just because someone is on disability or has a mental health problem doesn't make them a bad person or even an undesirable person...any more than having a physical disability or a chronic STD would. Even using mild drugs like pot aren't *necessarily* a blocking concern IMO, any more than regular drinking *necessarily* is. However, if you feel he's got an addiction problem or if his substances seem to be a central part of his life, that's another matter.

We all have our "stuff." Some of us are able to deal with certain "stuff" in others and some of us just don't know how. If being around a mental illness is a problem for you then clearly you are not the right person for him, nor he for you. That doesn't make either of you bad people.

I can really understand how you'd be very drawn to someone who obviously likes you (and you him), especially if you've come out of a difficult relationship that left you feeling empty, lonely and in need of some TLC. I don't know if you've "been played" or not but I suspect not as much as you might fear. I certainly don't get the sense from what you've said that he'd be a good candidate for a steady, solid, committed, long-term relationship, but there's a lot of room between that and him simply being a "player." And if the best way he can think of spending his days is drinking at the local bar, he doesn't strike me as someone who's going to be able to offer you a very inspired or passionate relationship.

Somewhere I once read that you should always believe what a man says about himself -- if he says he doesn't want to hurt you, that suggests he sees in himself the capacity to do just that and doesn't know how to conduct himself in a way that would ensure that didn't happen. You might be wise to believe him.

As for the herpes, for your own peace of mind you should consider getting a type-specific blood test 4 months after the last time you two were together sexually, just so you can rest assured that you didn't catch anything from him.

Keep us posted how you're doing. http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif

TheOneInFour

Hi Patty,

Thanks for clarifying. http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif It really doesn't sound like he's the right guy for you, all feelings of natural attraction notwithstanding. You can't love someone who doesn't love and respect the best in himself enough to cultivate it...and who doesn't respect his own health (and yours) enough to find out whether or not he has a chronic STD. The right guy for you IS out there http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif but I think you're going to have to look elsewhere. Is there a support group for people with herpes near where you are? It might be a way of introducing some new possibilities into your life and distract you from Mr. Dog Jogger. http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/wink.gif

1in4

AAGK!! Sorry!! My brain must have gone offline when I assumed you have herpes. (duh) Okay, well I was suggesting the support group because people with herpes often prefer to avoid having to have "the talk" with prospective partners (telling them about having herpes).

Since you don't have herpes (that we know of), you might check out various dating events, services and social organisations. (Not that people with herpes can't do that, of course...) I was just responding to you saying how hard it is when you see him pass by your house all the time, so I thought maybe bringing in some new possibilities might make that easier for you.

Okay, I'll shut up now. LOL

1in4