Hi All,

My Mom has mild dementia and some physical challenges (like incontinence) and is now living with me in my house. I've been taking leave from my job for a long time now and I need to get back to work, so I'm looking for someone to come into my house while I'm at work and look after Mom. Should be a pretty easy job, Mom is easy to deal with and sleeps almost all day, so no special skills are required, just someone reliable and trustworthy.

My major choice at this point, I think, is whether I should go with a company that provides in-home care, like Comfort Keepers, or should I just advertise directly for someone?

Any thoughts or advice?

Thanks,
jw

Personally, unless you know the individual that you have asked to stay with your Mom, I would go with a company. I would want to have someone that is licensed and bonded and is CPR trained. I would also want the person to be knowledgeable in elder care and in care of people with dementia and Alzherimers. I want to know what kind of experience they have and what their background is. After all, I am entrusting them with my parent, who is one of the most important people in my life.. but this is my decision.

I happen to live in Fairfax also, so know about our area. I think that you stand a risk of being hoodwinked by just any old soul who decided that an easy buck can be made by taking care of an old lady for awhile. Things can start to disappear or get misplaced...

The benefits from having a licensed company is that if your sitter can't make it for a day, they can provide a replacement, so you don't end up at home because of their illness. The company is responsible for checking their references and making sure that they are CPR trained and knowledgeable. It just seems to be a better situation to me. Plus, if you have issues with the sitter, it is the companies job to deal with the problem, not yours....

But then, your Mom might not be bad enough to need such specialized care, I don't know. You are the only one who can decide that.

I agree with Ibake. We were lucky enough to get a referal, actually an angel, at the very time we needed to find somebody. A family friend, who was also the hospital chaplin, had just lost her mother to ALZ and the lady that stayed with her mother for years was available. She was amazing and surpisingly willing to stay with two dementia patients at once. This lady was definitely a blessing. But I also know that it was a product of luck, coincidence, a small town, and knowing who to ask. We had tried to use the Department of Aging list of independent sitters with no luck. If it had not been for this lucky referal we were going to have to find placement or go with corporate inhome care.

As Ibake said, with corporate inhome care, they deal with most of the problems and are responsible for background checks and being sure their employees are trustworthy. They also provide replacements if your sitter can not be there. Be sure to ask 1,000 question before you decide what you want to do. You are entrusting them with a precious person that cannot give you feed back on the care she is receiving. Also be vigilent until you are comfortable that you have the best fit possible.

You might also want to determine the level of care you need. If there are no medications involved you can use a certified care giver or aid. If medications are involved only a licensed nurse can administer them (by corporate rules). Be sure to determine what you want done and make sure the sitter knows what you expect. We were lucky in that our Angel would give medications, cook, clean, take mom and Dad to appointments, and even take them out to social activities. She just didn't do windows!

Good luck in your search, whichever way you go. Just be thorough in your preinvestigation of whoever you chose.

Love, deb

Thanks to everyone who replied. Your comments convinced me to go with corporate care and I was fortunate to find a very good caregiver through Home Instead. She and Mom hit it off right away. We just completed our first week with the caregiver here and me at work, and so far everything is going well.

jw

I am so very pleased for you and your Mother jw. I hope it continues to be a perfect match and you can work in peace...

Love, Deb