Do any of you have any experience in this? My dad's blood pressure is just all over the map. One hour it's 140/105 and the next it's 90/40. When it's high, he has a little more zip, but when it's low, he's just out of it. The doctor does not seem to feel this is anything to be concerned with, but it just doesn't seem right to me.

Also - his lips and nose and chin are getting purple. Again - doctor does not seem concerned, but his lips especially are dark purple. And he is functioning! His chin is starting to be purplish and his nose is periodically purplish. And his nail beds are pink, but his fingers are bluish.

Maybe I am just being a hypochondriac about all this. If I am, please straighten me out!

Thanks, all...

...deb

Sounds definitely like poor circulation. My mom's BP drops when she stands, but nothing that dramatic!

I'd definitely get a second opinion. If your dad is up there in age, maybe that is why the doctor is dismissing this, but it's still no reason not to look into why!

Good luck!

Thanks, Sunnydaze. I will definitely get a second opinion. I have a hard time trusting my own instincts sometimes.

I often feel like the things that seem so wrong with daddy don't seem all that wrong to the doctor. Makes me think that I am just hyper-sensitive about him.

Especially this purple-lips thing.

...deb

I dont' think you are being hypersensitive, especially about the purplish tinges. I do know that there is a huge error potential in blood pressure readings. The difference can be 25 to 30 mg but that is a bit more than you are seeing with those two readings. The way the blood pressure is take is very important. Different positions on the arm gives you different readings. Salt intake, stress levels, exercise level, and other factors can also make it fluctuate. I would be more concerned as to why the purple tinges to his lips, chin, and fingers.

Is your Dad on any blood pressure medication? If so is he taking it regularly? Other medications can cause changes in BP as well. Especially medications for colds and allergies. Time of day will give you different pressures if medication is related.

If you have a home BP monitor try taking the BP 3 to 5 times during the day, keeping a log, to see if you can find a pattern that relates to something such as food, medication, stress level. Take it several times in a row to see if there is any consistency. It should not fluctuate that dramatically only minutes apart. Then you can be armed with information to give the doctor.

There is also a condition called Pheochromocytoma which is marked by small adrenal tumors that can cause radical spikes in BP. There is a clonidine test and a 24 hour urine test that is a preliminary screening for this condition. It might be worth asking the doctor to do these test to rule out this condition.

My Dad has horrible circulation in his legs. He has limited feeling and color in his feet and toes but we know that is partly caused by the veins that were taken for his heart bypasses and his other vascular problems (he has vascular dementia). We have not noticed that kind of BP variations with him. Yet we have seen the purple tinges that you mentioned in areas.

Good luck in looking for an answer and I say go for that second opinion if you are not satisfied with the answers you are receiving. You are your Dad's best advocate :)

Love, deb

deb,

does youdad complain of his heart beating fast when he stands up? and does he say his legs ache? The only reason I ask is my dad had alot of the same symptoms and had in addtion to vascular demtia, an abdominal anuerism that could have been caught if the doctor would have been more aggresive in tracking dowm why daddy was having problems instead of telling him to take Tylenol because his legs ached!

Keep pushing girl!

Wow, Ibake. I have never asked him. But I will - you can bet on that!

I just got daddy's blood work results from the doctor. They told me they would call with the results, and they didn't, so I placed a total of 5 calls to the office to get some answers. I think the doctor's office hates me. In fact, I am sure of it.

I don't think the physicians realize that they may see our loved ones every month, or two weeks, or whatever, but we see them 24/7, and every little thing can bring us worry. Panic, even.

If I had a magic wand, I would wave it above all the doctor's heads to grant them the insight into our worlds. We are the ones that catch them when they tip over. We are the ones that try to explain to our loved ones that it really IS Tuesday. We are the ones that try to patiently spoon applesauce into the mouths of those that don't want it. We are the ones that wash their faces, wipe their butts, clip their nails and cook their meals.

We are the ones. And we'd all do it over and over again.

Why can't the medical profession give our loved ones and their caregivers that extra 10 minutes to check for an aneurism? It's so sad.

Thanks for the heads-up, ibake. I will get right on that...

...deb

Good question Deb!! That is the very reason I have changed doctor's repeatedly until I have one that listens. I had major problems with Mom's doctor. He wanted Mom to say home and functional as long as possible but he didn't see what we saw and would not accept that it was no longer possible. He was also the one that told my Mom, after reading a bleek cognative testing report, that she just needed to pay more attention to her driving. Hello Doctor... are you in there.... she has moderate to sever dementia!!! Telling her to pay more attention is like telling a bone to heal itself. I called him because Mom was laying in the yard sobbing and saying she wanted to die. They offered an appointment next week. NOT!!! I will bring her in and she can do that in your lobby until you see her. On the other hand Dad's doctor branded him with ALZ without a second thought when in fact he has vascular dementia. The doctor stories I could tell......

Just be sure to have your name on your Dad's HIPPA forms at every medical facility and be your Dad's best advocate. It doesn't matter if you are liked, it matters if you Dad is well cared for. So say whatever you need to say, say it loud enough to be heard, and say it often if necessary. If necessary find another doctor that has ears that listen. There are good caring doctor's out there.

Love, Deb

Thanks, Deb. The validation means so much. And I do have my name on the HIPPA forms at every hospital and at the doctor's office. Assuming I stay with this doctor. Dad will throw a major hissy if we change doctors - he knows this one is gorgeous, and he is a man, after all! Ha.

Deb, since you obviously (thank God) have a lot of experience here, let me ask you a question. It's kind of indelicate, so forgive me, please.

One of dad's obsessions is his...um...bowels. He eats so little, and I try to get him plenty of fiber, but he just doesn't "go" every day, and will spend (I am not kidding here) 2 hours a day on the toilet, straining, trying to produce something that will not appear. He has actually fallen asleep on the toilet he spends so long in there. He uses Preparation H suppositories every day, expecting them to help him. I cannot for the life of me convince him that it is not necessary he has a bowel movement every day, especially since he only eats about 800 calories a day now.

Any words of wisdom? Thanks!

...deb

I had similar experiences with my Mom. Her legs turned dark purple. There were cracks in them, which the NH staff treated with some kind of metal strip bandaged down (pressure bandages?) Her legs have always been bad, she had varicose veins. But the real reason for the purple legs was heart failure, and that may also have affected her brain. All the heart medicines she was on stopped working about a year before her death - they simply had NO effect any more. It was a masterful act that she didnt have to have a leg amputated. Yet she never seemed to feel any pain in her legs. Of cóurse not being able to walk those last 2 years did nothing to help her circulation.

IT is OK to be pushy at the doctor's. Mom's doc laughed and laughed at my descriptions of her forgetfulness, running away, problems with continence etc. It struck him as funny that this 90 something year old lady was acting like a child. He was near retirement himself and later when his son took over the practice, FINALLY AD was diagnosed. Everyone is in denial, even doctors. What an awful disease.

I am up early for my flight home this afternoon/evening ... will be back on this Board regularly after this ... it has been great being in Germany these 2 weeks.

Love,

Martha

Martha, I am so pleased that you have enjoyed your trip and I look forward to your return home. You have been such a blessing to me and have been missed here :-)

I wish I knew the answer to your question Deb but it is not unusual for the elderly to be obcessed with bowl movements. We get color notifications from Dad but not the obcession since he really doesn't have a time frame to know when he goes. He actually gives us very little warning when the time comes. I do remember this obcession too well from my days working long term care. Prunes were a favorite side dish and Exlax was the hottest commodity on the back hall black market. Our number one requested med was laxatives. Just make sure he is not constipated. Otherwise all you can do is be sure that he gets the fiber he needs and you might try prunes or prune juice if needed. If you can suggest that he has gone earlier in the day convincingly it might coax him off the toilet. Or you might be able to make suggestions of something enticing with a let's wait and see what happens later in the afternoon comment. You are right, at 800 calories a day he is not going to go every day. But remember it is his reality and not yours that counts. Logic is not there. You just have to be creative, while not argumentative, to get him where he needs to be. Wonder if you could convince him that if he eats something it will happen sooner? It is a phase that goes with not knowing when they have to go but knowing that they should go. I wish you luck with this one but know it will not last forever.....

Love, deb

Deb and Deb,

I have something that you can try. Miralax. It is now sold OTC. It was a script. I take it because of the heavy narcotic meds that I take bc of my back issues. You stir it in juice or water or whatever...it has no taste or mouth feel and I can guarantee that in three days you will be (excuse me), poo-ing on a regular basis and it won't be hard and our dear elderly won't be straining. What more can you ask for? Ok, so it does cause a little gas...and I do remember my aunt Clara who couldn't hear any more walking across the kitchen floor tooting as she walked, thinking that no could hear her, carrying on her conversation...she was slightly deaf so she couldn't hear herself. OBviously she couldn't smell either! Oh dear LOL.....

Anyway... Miralax is great. My DIL uses it for our grandson when he has issues so that's how gentle it is.. You can get it at Target, Walmart. The best deal is at Costco, BJ, Sams... It is well worth trying. It does take a few days for it to work, but it is worth it. And it is an every day deal. I take my pills with it every morning without fail. It has made my life manageable, and that is a blessing. This may be the solution to your problems...

I feel so good for having an answer... :) when you said delicate I thought it was going to be about....you know...the other topic......(ssssshhhhhh sexxxx)

You need to go on the pain management board. We talk about this all the time because we all suffer from it on a on going basis...

Thanks, ibake...

I read your post a couple of hours ago and was headed to Target for dog food for daddy's dog, and picked up a thingy of the Miralax. I stirred it into daddy's juice and he drank it right down. As far as gas, who cares? If he will just poop about 17 times a day, maybe he will feel better about his bowels. Heh.

Today is a weird day. Really weird. Can any of you relate to this...?

Remember, yesterday, daddy accused me of torturing him because I showered him and got him cleaned up. He went to bed at 1pm, and stayed there till this morning. OK - here's the weird part - HE WOKE UP THIS MORNING LIKE THE GUY OF A YEAR AGO! Now, his mental state is still all demented, as he has dementia, but he dressed HIMSELF appropriately, shaved HIMSELF, ate cereal and juice and applesauce for breakfast, 2 slices of pizza and chocolate cake and ice cream for lunch, is walking all over the place (shuffling, actually, but motating!)...what is up with this? One day, I am thinking Hospice is the way to go, and the next, he is begging for the shed keys so he can work outside. (He ain't gettin' the keys. I'll never find them again, and he is not gonna work outside...no matter what.)

Is this typical? I can't keep up. I swear. This damned disease is not just horrible and cruel and ugly, it's also confusing.

Thanks again, ibake. I will be giving daddy miralax daily...

...deb

Thank you Ibake!! More than Dad, Mom has a major problem when she is on pain meds so I will put that in my bag of tricks for her.

I chuckled myself when the sensitive subject turned out to be bathroom behavior. Working with the elder that is the main topic of discussion rather than a taboo subject. I was thinking that other subject too Ibake... :-) But I have stories about that as well. I will kepe them to myself!!

Yes Skimps this IS the way this disease is. Dad's rather stable with his vascular dementia but Mom is all over the place. One day she is tearful, the next she is angry, the next she is happy. Some days she is very cooperative and others she is stubborn and ornery as an old snake. I don't know which Mom will show up. All you can do is just be weary until you figure out what mood then are in. Enjoy the good day and count them as a blessing and a respit that helps you endure the not so good days. As for working outside, Mom loved days she could do that. I just kept all power tools away from her. How much trouble can you get into with some work gloves and a spade. The hours she spent rearranging the pine straw (literally taking it up, picking out all the leaves and debris and laying it back down) and pulling weeds out of the grass were some of her happiest. We just had to be careful that she didn't overheat and drank enough to keep properly hydrated. Oh and we had to go get her out of the rain a few times. But she loved it!! Anything that makes the smile and is not dangerous is ok.

Love, Deb

PS.. I needed this chuckle this after noon. Thank you both :)