Hello friends....
Well...things are looking very grim at the moment.....late last week, my grandmother was so bad she was taken to hospital late at night for pains in her stomach. She was diagnosed with a kidney infection at 3am. Seeing the exhaustion and despair in my uncle, they finally came up with a place that she could go for a "week" to give my uncle some much needed rest. He hated doing it, but took her there. It killed him doing it, but he did it, as no other family member of course cares. She was there since Friday, and we were told she just sat "weeping heavily". My uncle took her out early and brought her home this morning.....she has not been awake since. This place was not a place that could administer any medication to actually "care" for her, it was just to provide him with a break.....so they wouldnt give her anything that wasnt already prescribed by her doctor. However, when she came out, and ever since, she is "out of it", has no idea where she is. Her mouth was completely caked in white powder, residue of medication. She woke and needed to go to the washroom, was very agitated, screaming "let me out"....and then her body began twitching for about 5 minutes. I called the hospital myself from all the way over here in Canada and asked them what they gave her as she was not like this when she went in, they said "nothing", and she kept "spitting it out".
To this point, she still hasnt woken up.....my uncle has called the doctor and based on his description of her symptoms was told that she is severely dehyrdated, which explains the twitching, and it is critical that she get to a hospital to be hooked up with fluids and antibiotics intravenously. Her regular doctor is on his way to the house, and will confirm the diagnosis and then they will attempt to get her to the hospital. The last time they tried, she freaked out when she saw the ambulance and if you can believe it, they told my uncle they may have to get the police to come and put handcuffs on her to get her in the ambulance. My god how inhuman! Fortunately, she settled down enough and my uncle drove her there. Today is another story since she's just come out of that place, she may think she's going back there again. I dont know what this is, is this the end? I just dont know.....this just breaks my heart all this pain.
Since Friday, her other daughters knew she was going to this home, we've heard nothing. They heard she was taken out and we've heard nothing. I know they know she's very ill today, and we've heard "nothing". Someone please explain to me how people can be so cruel to the person who gave birth to them, because I dont understand it.....
I really hate this.......
Thanks for listening....

Carsam

I'm so sorry Carsam, for your Grandma and for your Uncle and of course for you and your mother, so far away and trying so hard to do the right thing. I don't know much abut the medical condition she is in, but being unconscious for so long is not a good sign, so it is possible that the end is near. I just hope your Uncle doesn't crack up when the responsibility he has taken upon himself for so long comes to a sudden end.

You are all in my thoughts and prayers. Please let us know what happens.

love,

Martha

Dearest Martha,
You are such a wonderful and kind soul.....no matter when I come here you always respond to me, god bless you!
Well Martha, she was taken again to hospital, and has been released home. Doctor said yes, she was "slightly" dehydrated, and definitely being affected by her infection as she wasnt getting the antibiotics while in that place. (I'm realy not sure what type of place it was). He also said she took a bad turn from the change in environment and was heading "a bad way". So they decided to send her home thinking that there would be a better chance of her taking the antibiotics from her son, than in a hospital, as she gets so anxious in that environment. At the moment, she is home and actually trying to eat something.
I really dont know how much more her poor body can take......or how much my uncle can take. You know Martha, I think his hatred and bitterness towards his siblings is as difficult for him to deal with as her illness, it consumes and suffocates him. The things is Martha, this responsiblity was really "put" on him. He was unmarried and still living with her at the time and another uncle who has since passed from bowel cancer. The rest of the siblings are all married with families, and grandchildren, so they just basically left all of it to the son who was already in the right place at the right time. They helped at first, but they would give the time that they could, but soon it became less and less over time. When my uncle started going night after night with no sleep, thats when things went bad, and of course he started to lash out and beg for help, and that's how it all went from bad to worse.
I also have found it so hard to believe there is nowhere decent for her to go to....he really is now at the point where he would be willing to let her go if there was such a place. When I heard of this, I thought it was a good idea, and finally they've found somewhere.....but Martha, she did not have one bite of food for two days in this place.....and her entire mouth was caked in medication, from spitting it out. This cant be right? When she went there on Friday, she was as well as you could expect her to be, and she could respond to you. When she came out, two men had to carrry her, and she never opened her eyes for hours.....she was so far gone.
Anyways, Martha, I think I had told you we were waiting for some results on my mom's bonescan, and thank God it came back clear and she is okay. Thank the Lord for some mercy through all of this. But quickly we are back now dealing with this awful illness again.....there just never seems to be a break.
Thank you so much again for listening to me.....
Love, Carsam xo

I am so happy for your Mom's good news! One small light in the darkness. I also do not understand the medical system over there in Ireland. Surely anyone would have been able to help her swallow her meds, or if she can't swallow, to get them in liquid form. The powder in her mouth must have been remains of incompletely swallowed pills. You are in my prayers. Somehow, all will be well.

During our hassles with Mom's Alzheimer Disease, my brother always cheered me up with his philopsophy of life, which is:

"Everything will turn out all right in the end. If things don't seem to be going well, it isn't the end yet."

As bizarre as it may seem, there comes a time when death is the answer. The time comes when the person has suffered enough, and peace for the whole family is restored.

Love and prayers,

Martha

Well, it would seem my grandmother is at home again, and back to "normal"...whatever sad version of "normal" it is.....
That's the tough thing about this illness, so many times it looks like "this is it", and it just keeps going......

Carsam:angel: