I am 41, have been married 10 years and have two kids aged 5 and 7. I had a first OB about 8 months ago and have had two OB's since then. Ihave never had sex outside my marriage in 10 years.

My husband has never had an OB.

Is it possible that I (or my husband) could have had the virus all this time and I have only had OB's recently. I have always thought my husband would never have an affair - this is causing me to wonder.

Please help

Ozzie, please do a search for my postings and look for my second post dated March 29th titled, "I suppose I'm living proof".

I have been in practically the same situation as you are and have also found others like us, too. Unfortunately, the way this has entered our lives after all this time is not abnormal, as I have come to find out. Neither is your concern about your husband's fidelity. I can't say what's good for you but for me, the first question I asked my wife was if she cheated on me (after telling her that I loved her no matter what her reply was). Then I told her why I was asking. Our marriage is currently stronger than it has ever been, by the way. Also, she has no symptoms as of yet.

If I can answer any questions, please post back. I know what you are going through and I know how you feel. It'll be okay and so will you.

(I've tried to reply to this 3 times so if multiple posts show up, my apologies. I keep getting "banned messages for some reason)

If your husband gets cold sores, you might have got it via oral sex.

Otherwise, it is certainly possibly that either of you have had it, didn't realize it, and it is just now becoming active for some reason.

You might have him get a blood test (i.e. the Western Blot test) that can tell if he as been exposed to the virus and which virus type he has. (You will need this, too.) If he hasn't been exposed, then you know beyond a doubt he is innocent - but that he is also suspectible to catching the virus from you. If he has been exposed, then he can't be reinfected, but it can't be told if he gave it to or if you gave it to him.