So, final natural cycle before a non trying cycle (with BC to gear up for IVF) or possible IUI (before IVF)...we'll see what happens. I did not chart my temps this month at all and I'm not going to. I think from my CM, I O'd today...but I sort of wanted to take a break, but didn't want to go through the cycle without even trying, so we did the deed through the weekend and yesterday. ;) I refuse to stress myself out with all kinds of symptoms and wonderings and doubts...it's just too much and it's really taken it's toll in the last months.:dizzy: I am currently fasting and trying to lose weight at the moment (I know, :rolleyes: not a great time but only for a week) and I'm going to focus on being active and toning up this month before my cruise...I have my RE appointment next week to see what lies ahead.:angel:

Hey I'm all for NOT obsessing...not very good at it,that's the problem!:rolleyes:
I'm charting my temps online for first time this month...excited and relieved to see that I've O'd and we can relax and not feel 'the pressure' to BD.

Last night was funny, cos DH and I had a chat, and he said he wanted me to keep busy in this 2ww...and even though he was up really early for work did I want to BD...I said no, I think we've done all we can, let's have a rest, to which he replied, 'cool well you're home tomorrow night aren't you' ....I just paused, trying to formulate my response, when he laughed and said 'ahhh you meant a 2 week rest not a 24 hour one!!:D' typical male/female coversation I'd say.

My online fertility site's pretty groovy, and has even given me the earliest date they think I should do a HPT....so I need to focus on continueing the rest of this month being as good and positive as I have been for the first 2 weeks....oh it's gonna be tough....:(

Im in this one too. We did 3 day 3 embryo transfer last friday and have the beta on the 6th.
Good luck to us all ladies.
Mady

Hi ladies!
...my official testing day (too pee or not to pee;)) is the 11th...but AF will probably show her ugly red face on or before.:o
I hope one of us can carry through this horrid 2ww with some terrific news! Baby dust all around!:angel:

Hi there ladies I am in the end of my 2ww I test on Monday.So affraid of Beta day I swear I have such a fear of that day after so many BFN's.So a few more days of not obsessing for me to go :D I swear ladies this 2ww is horrible.Well heres to our BFP's ladies.Have a good afternoon.

Eva:)

I'm starting to sneeze with all that babydust floating around..bring it on!!:D

My online charting folk have given me a date of 14th June....it's longer than normal as it's my first chartered cycle and they have no history...but DH wants to test sooner than that....we'll see. I'd like to hang on as long as possible.

We all need to have a busy weekend, with a bit of pampering thrown in! I'm working nights Fri/Sat/Sun but then I have 3 days off with DH, so we'll have our weekend then.

Hope AF stays at bay ladies...

So I had to go off the fast and do a modified fast...was feeling REALLY low energy today.:yawn: I was so weak, my mind was clouded and I literally couldn't think straight. That has never happened before when I did my other fasts...so I think it's better to be healthy even though I want to lose weight quickly. I don't think this "light-headedness" is a sign, I'm not reading into it at all.:cool: It's most probably my fasting but it does seem awfuly strange. :jester:It's only 3 or 4 days past O, so I wouldn't feel anything yet...and I'm definitely not questioning it!!! AAHHHH!!! :p So much for not obsessing!!!!

I wouldn't be able to fast if you paid me!!! I've been eating really healthily though for a while now, with some junk thrown in occasionally. I'd say fasting isn't good if you're pregnant though....you need to nourish the wee :angel:

I'm taking more vitamens and supplements than ever before, eating better, more fruit and veg than before....and for the first time in over 2 years I'm sick:(

Have had to call in sick for work tonight...missing a Sat wage:mad:

course my temperature went from 36.63 up to 37.31...not a true reflection obviously. oh well ho hum, hope this doesn't affect anything that may be going on in there.

I just want to clarify that my fast is by no means NO food. It's supposed to be 3 protien shakes a day and nothing else but green tea and vegetable broth. It's a specific brand of soy protein. :)
Yeah, I agree, I think it's better to just eat healthy, especially if I'm pg (which I doubt). However, I have done this fast before and lost a lot of weight quickly and was proned to do that again (especially before IVF).:jester:
I don't think getting sick is a terrible thing...I have heard of others getting really sick during 2ww and it turned out that they were indeed pregnant by the end!;) Your body just has to work double duty so you may be even more tired.

So, my appointment with a new RE is in 2 days and I'm getting a little nervous to start this process all over again!:rolleyes: I think it's going to be harder and easier this time around with a little one in toe. Easier, because there's not SO much pressure since we already have one, and of course, I'll know what to expect. But harder, because I have to worry about my daughter too as I'm off stressing about my shots, appointments and so on and also I'll be more tired as I take care of more than just myself this time around.
On a side note, I'm feeling better on a modified diet but still feeling off.:yawn: NOT looking into those feelings at all. This cycle, any and all symptoms will be chalked up to PMS and getting over from being sick and the fast...if I am at all pregnant, I will be so shocked!:eek: Tuesday should be about 1 week in and 1 week left. So, the wait continues...:p

If you don't post between now and then, good luck with your RE appointment. You sound like you have a plan and are positive, which is great. Fingers and toes crossed.

I've had a stitch like pain on my left side down low, and had 2 bouts of nausea last night at work. The second lasted all the way home, and although my appetite had diminished..(that's a first!), I had eaten enough but had some toast before going to bed.

Last month I had both symptoms, and AF arrived on doorstep days later...but here's hoping and praying....temperature went up again on 7DPO, highest so far (except my one day of illness).

I read on elsewhere that pregnant women are susceptible to picking up bugs and colds etc due to their immune system being suppressed so that the body doesn't reject the embryo as a foreign object. That made me happy!:D

Airline, oooooh, I've heard that too! You know, apparently a sniffly nose is a sign of pregnancy! :D I'm hoping what yu're going through is indeed a sign! :D

KM, that fast sounds interesting! I like how they emphasize the protein shakes----our western carb based diets tend to shut out the importance of protein. Good luck with your new RE! And I am so hoping that your under the weather-ness is because of a hiding BFP!!! :D

I htink I O'ed yesterday (full story on May/June and "my" thread) but am not sure. By the way that today is going, I htink yesterday was O day, CD 14, a little earlier than usual, but still good. :) So I guess that means I'm offically in the 2ww. Sooooooo excited about that :rolleyes: I'm really doing my best not to get too excited this time around. But ebing that I am trying to redeem myself at work and I'm enrolling in school again, maybe that won't be too hard. :)

Hoping we're having a great day and *****************babydust*************** *********

Very weird cramping today...it felt like AF/PMS was here and it was coming on really strong!:o But, I'm like a week away so I don't know what that was all about!!:confused: Can a person implant and feel strong cramping like AF cramping?? Also, feeling incredibly tired today!:yawn:
Still, not looking into any symptom at all!!:jester:

Hi Princess! :D So glad you could join us!
I will go to my RE appointment tomorrow. Feeling a bit anxious, but happy and hopeful to move forward from where we are.:angel:

KM, good luck at your RE appointment tomorrow. I'm hoping he'll be able to fit the IVF cycle (should you need it) into your summer schedule. - April

Thanks April!:D I was just reading your posts on May/June cycles and saw you are getting your ER Wednesday!! How exciting! You're almost at the end!!! Happy Triggering!! And here's some baby (petri) dancing:bouncing::bouncing: and doubling vibes :blob_fire:blob_fire coming your way!!;):angel:

Princess welcome, welcome to the 2ww....it's a blast!!:dizzy:

Km fingers crossed still....hmmm I get the odd cramp mid cycle, isn't the body a wonderful thing!!

DH and I had a bit of a sad day cos I had my acupunture session and she took me by surprise and said she didn't think I was pregnant:(
I'd told her everything that had happened in the last 2 weeks...thyroid test - all good, charting temps - BDing in right times for the software to evaluate we had a 'high' chance of conceiving re. timing, nausea, 8DPO and on CD26etc. But after checking my pulse, she said she didn't think I was, but would not do certain things just in case.

It was the first -ve thing that's happened this cycle, and we were both really quite +ve. Anyway, I reckon that western medical experts can get it wrong, so can eastern. It's not over till the fat lady sings and all that.

I've got some horrible chinese stuff to take daily, so we'll just wait and wait and wait a bit more.

Hahahah KM, it's SO hard not to obsess over every event isn't it? But I htink that yes, it is indeed possible to feel implantation as strong as AF cramps. Here's hoping for that BFP!! I'm really excited to hear abotu the RE appointment!

Oh Airline, I'm sorry that your acupuncturist gave you such news. Was she taking your pulse, to see if you have the pregnancy pulse? If that's what (s)he did, take heart. My boss (acupuncturist and herbalist) says that it's hard to detect until the fourth month! Oh. And I see that it was during the pulse taking. Please, don't lose hope yet. I'm a bit peeved on your behalf, because honestly, I've only ever heard that they can detect pregnancy from the pulse only really by the fourth month. There are some indications before then, yes, but they are really unreliable. So unless your acupuncturist thinks that yu're greater than four months along, she would do best to keep that "information" to herself.

Sorry, Airline, if that sounds harsh, but honestly, at this point, it's too early to tell by pulse. Don't let this get you down. As you said, yu've been having a positive cycle so far, keep it positive!! You ARE going to get your BFP!!! :D

Hi there ladies first off want to wish you all good luck in the rest of your 2ww.My 2ww came to an end yesturday with a BFP.I just wanted to tell you all that you shouldent look into signs.I am a perfect example.I had some brown discharge on Sunday so I stopped my progesterone AF never came went for beta on Monday knowing it was BFN.I had NO signs and thankfully still dont.I not only got a BFP but RE says possible twins or triplets with such high numbers.So see my hcg is in the 400's and I still have no signs.My RE told me not to worry not all women get signs and I might be one of the lucky ones who doesnt get signs.

Airline I am sorry to hear about what your accupuncurist said but I wouldent pay to much mind to that I think its all silly.So whats a pregnancy pulse exaclty?First time I heard about that.Ok well I wish you luck girls.

Eva:)

Eva!!! WOW!: Congrats! And twins or triplets!!:bouncing::bouncing::bouncing: That's amazing! I can't believe you stopped the progesterone after a negative hpt since you never know with one of those...but I'm sure everything is fine!;) Can't wait to hear how many little beans you have in there!
Sorry Airline about what your acupuncturist said, but I definitely think it's too early to tell with pulse.
Speaking of acupuncture, my acupuncturist gave me some interesting news today...I told her about my cramping and she said, at best it could be implantation cramping:D and at worst, an ectopic pregnancy:eek: but not likely since it would be too early to have pain from that! In the in between, it could just be "poo cramping" she said, but it really doesn't feel like constipation which is usually more in the stomach region for me. This is coming from way low and deep inside. So, if I wasn't obsessing before, now, I certainly will be thinking about it!!!:dizzy: She also asked if I took a pregnancy test, which I of course told her no since it was too early!! I still have a week to go!
Got to get ready to meet my new RE! Wouldn't it be incredibly ironic to go through the motions to start something new and actually be pg!!! OMG!!!:jester:

Hahahah, KM I am SO hoping you are PG!! :D And you know, that sounds like it really could be implantation!! I'm so excited fo ryou!! Sorry,you're probably going to knife me with your mouspad of something, :jester: but when do you beta? I'm just DYINGGGGG to hear abotu your BFP!

Hi KM I am praying to hear some good news from you.As for me stopping the progesterone I know it was silly but it was only for one day dont think there was much harm done.I am such a firm believer that if something is meant to be it will be no matter what.Well I will be praying for your BFP.

Eva

Oh my God Eva....flippin' fantastic!!! twins or triplets???? those BFPs just keep coming and coming don't they!! whoo hoo!:bouncing:

Thank you ladies for your thoughts and comments, appreciated more than you know. I went to bed feeling a bit low, and woke up feeling the same....then had to deal with my furbabies being sick and peeing over the side of the litter tray not 'in' the tray :rolleyes:.....then fed them all (I have 3 cats and 1 chocolate lab)....and finally I could logon, by which time I was just irritable.:(

Anyway....Princess I didn't know you worked for an acupuncturist, how interesting!! Your words definately did hearten me, although I'm wondering about my acupuncturist. She trained in China, and has been practicing for 20 years, and was recommended. Will wait and see what happens next time, which according to her will be just after AF...but hoprfully not!:D

Eva, I'm not sure what a pregnancy pulse is exactly, but she also told me she could sex a baby depending whether the yin or yang pulse was stronger. She's also turned breach babies and helped induce births.

Thanks KM for confirming what Princess said. I think it's too early for most signs too....I guess you start to believe what you want to and not what you don't .... then eventually your head starts to spin!:dizzy:

Catch you all later and look forward to seeing your HCG levels keep rising Eva!

So my new RE said it was unlikely I was pg even though I didn't tell him about my cramping and my DH hasn't done a recent SA to see if there's been improvement...:rolleyes:, so now I'm not feeling that positive about it.
As far as my appointment, he sort of rubbed me the wrong way saying it was "unusual" to be obsessing about the small details of my past cycles especially if I indeed became pregnant. I just told him I am and was concerned with what was happening to my body. I really don't think being successful with IF should change a person's perspective on the whole process, as if I'm not supposed to care about the procedure just because it worked!!:o
But, on a brighter side, he does seem extremely knowledgeable and even wrote an infertility book! And, he seemed confused about the protocal at my last clinic, wondering why they seemed to "overstim" me...he reassured me that wouldn't happen again and I would get all my questions answered. And, I can do IVF in July like I wanted!!:bouncing: I am going to take BCPs starting with this next cycle (if I'm not pg now of course;)) and keep taking them to delay AF during my cruise. So, now I can relax, have a good time on my vacation and not stress over any of those things! :D

Princess, I won't have a beta b/c this was a natural cycle but I'll probably POAS with an hpt by this weekend to see what's up!

KM good luck Hun. I hope that BFP will surface this weekend. And just in case, what great news that you'll be able to do IVF in July like you were hoping!

Airline, hang in there. That acupuncturist can't know for certain by your pulse. In my first couple IVF attempts my acupuncturist told me I had the perfect pregnancy pulse and bfn's. This time I never saw my acupuncturist once and of course got my bfp. I still think acupuncture is great, but I know from experience it's not a perfect medicine. I'm still very hopeful for you!

Princess, I know your 2ww is just getting started but some early good luck wishes can't hurt right??? Wishing you the best!

*****Babydust to All******

Airline-- Oh sweeit,e I knwo it's hard to not worry, especially when someone in the health care profession tells us something we don't want to hear. She sounds very well qualified, but reemmber, in the end, she's just liek the hpt. But don't pee on her, okay? :jester: What I mean is, it could very well be too early for her to tell. And she is human, which means she is just as susceptible to human error as you or myself or anyone. Maybe she had a bad day and couldn't tell. Or maybe it was very thin, since it's still a bit early, and she didn't want to raise hopes. But, as you said, we shall see, and one thng is for certian, you WILL be a mommy very soon!!

KM, I'm so sorry, I shoudl have remembered!!! :o I'll be crossing my fingers for you this weekend, hoping to read a BFP announcement on Monday!! :D

Kari-- Good luck wishes can never, ever hurt! I still can't believe I'm in the 2ww already. This cycle has just blown by! And I'm further distracted by my school things coming! :D I dont know what CD I am, or how many dpo I am.... I'm so distracted. On one hand, that feels llike a good thing, like i"m not letting IF rule my life. But on the other hand, I feel liek I'm being unfaithful, as in I'm showing god or whoever, that I don't care. That I don't want to be a mother. I don't know, my feeling are conflicting again, lol.

Anyway, I hope you ladies are doing well!!

OMG! OMG! OMG!:eek: I think I had implantation bleeding today!! I had a few brownish spots today on my undies and with all that cramping the other day, I'm wondering, could it really be?? Is implantation usually red or brown? Maybe it's old blood b/c my little embaby implanted 2 days ago when I had all those cramps? I really don't want to get my hopes up, but OMG!!!:angel:

Oh KM I am praying thats it.Usually implantation spotting is brown or pink not red.I am really excited for you I really hope thats what it is.Keep us posted.When is beta?Have a nice afternoon.

Eva :)

Actually, I don't have a beta b/c this was a natural cycle. I am going to wait at least until the weekend to test with an hpt because AF is not expected until a week from today so if I test any earlier, than it's probably too soon!!:jester: I'm still not going to believe it until I know for sure!

Oh thats right natural cycle sorry I forgot.Well I will be looking forward to hearing your results.Take care.

Eva :)

So, feeling REALLY exhausted lately:yawn:...my boobs were a bit tingly as well yesterday and this morning and nausia:p yesterday on a long field trip bus ride. I still don't want to get my hopes up and I'm finding it hard to NOT think about it all! I have had tingly boobies, nausia, exhaustion and all those positive signs in the past and :mad:NOTHING!! But, I've never had sever cramping:o or brownish spots halfway through 2ww, which is making me nuts right now b/c I can't stop thinking about it!!:jester: Could that cramping or spotting be attributed to anything else???:confused:
Princess, Airline, how are the two of you?? Anything to report? :wave:

KM... it actually sounds very promising if you ask me!!! And I must say I love all of the smilies! It sends out this very positive vibe! I really hope this cycle has brought your BFP and then you will just be able to enjoy it this summer and not have to worry about any other cycles!!! The weekend is almost upon us! Good luck! Really looking forward to hearing good news from you!!!

Hey Km, well my temps dropped the last 2 days (10 and 11 DPO), which is not great...but still above coverline...I had mild cramping last night.

We were really silly though, and due to everything that I'd been feeling including the dinner on the 9DPO night where I gagged and couldn't eat it...(poor DH had cooked:(), we did a HPT on morning of 10DPO...BFN:(:(:(

Too early I know....but DH is as keen as me and between the two of us we couldn't help ourselves. Anyway, Ive been feeling quite positive cos he made a big point of saying, remember it could just be too early.

Sometimes I feel stupid clinging onto the hope that inspite of things I'm still hoping...but whatya do??:confused:

KM, I love those smileys!! I have to say, it sounds REAALYYYY promising!!! I really hope that this is your BFP, and you know what, I have a feeling it is!

Airline, I am SO sorry you had to see that BFN!! :( But as you said, and rightly so, it is still really early to tell. It's not at all stupid to hold on to hope, in fact, I htink it's very strong of you! Your BFP could still very well be waiting and developing inside of you! I'm praying for you, and all my sisters!

I'm diong all right, I'm only in the first half of 2ww, so I'm not analyzing for signs just yet. With work and preparing for school, I'm kind of busy. But Monday is my CD20 progesterone (Only I'll be CD22) and it seems that after that point, that's when I start getting (or imagining depending on how you look at it) signs. So hopefully, my books will arrive shortly, and I won't be able to obsess :p

Hoping you ladies are ahivng an amamzing day! HAPPY FRIDAY!! Its a HOT one today (was already T-shirt and short weather by 8:50am! :blob_fire) and I get off at 3. So I'm going to go home, watch Tyra, and then maybe sneak into a friend's pool! :D Love to you all!!

Hope you enjoyed your swim Princess:D 12DPO and CD30...slight temp increase after last 2 slight decreases. no cramping in over 24 hours, still praying.
Everyone enjoy their weekend;)

Airline, that's great that you had an increase! I'm hoping that's a positive sign for you that you have a lurking BFP!

Princess, I'm with you. Really only stressing in the 2nd half of the 2ww. I only started freaking out when I had those strong cramps and my acupuncturist said it could be implantation cramping! Then, the spotting...:dizzy: If there's no BFP somewhere in there, I don't know what to think!!! And, then, I'll start the process for another IVF, which I'm willing to accept but, it scares me too.:rolleyes:

So, the 2ww rolls on...good luck to all!!:angel:

Hi there ladies just wanted you to all know that I am really praying for you all.I hope to see some BFP's all around.KM let us know if you deceide to test tomorrow and if you do I will be praying you see that BFP.Well ladies enjoy the rest of your weekend.

Eva :)

Thanks for your kind words eva. Km....ooh keep us posted, waiting with bated breath.

Unfortunately I've had that kind of brown CM (sorry TMI) the last 2 days and mild cramping. Then this morning my temperature dropped from 36.78 to 36.35, still a fraction above coverline. Not v. hopeful at all now I'm afraid. Starting to get my mindset around the next cycle :( which will be my last Clomid.

My positive thoughts remain for all you guys. **** babydust **** twister coming your way

Well ladies, **REMOVED***, it looks my race is over...***REMOVED***I was just hanging on by the skin of my teeth and clutching at straws, and not feeling too gracious in the defeat! :(

My cramping is now constant and increasing with every minute to the point where panadol and hot water bottle are required. She's arrived...just not fully unpacked yet.

Gotta go to chemist to buy last round of clomid (was hanging out hoping there'd be no need).

DH's working tonight and I'm off, so I'm going to my parents for dinner.

May all the babydust in the world float around you lovely ladies still in the 2ww and make you sneeze;)

Oh, so sorry Airline!!:( Have you tested yet officially? When is AF expected to show? Maybe it's not over yet. :angel:Sometimes, period cramping mimics pregnancy cramping. Keep us posted, I'm still pulling for you!
As for me, I didn't test today either!!:D I am going to buy an hpt today so I don't know how long I can hold off until Wednesday with it in the house!;) I was thinking that with my daughter, she must have implanted late b/c my numbers were so low in the beginning and that might happen again so I should wait...but then I thought about it and I think I know when this little one implanted, so maybe I'd be okay to test tomorrow (which should be 12 or 13 dpo, and 7 days past possible implantation). Well, we'll see! Right now, I'm having a bit of nausia!:p so early in the morning....so I hope that's a good sign!!!:angel::jester::)
Princess, good luck tomorrow with your b/w. I hope your progesterone is where it should be!!

Hi ladies :) just stopping by to wish you all a storm of BABY DUST!!!! :angel: Hope you're all doing well... and cannot wait to hear a tonne of BFPs... take care and hang in there girls! :angel:

No Km I'm outta the game now. Most definately AF. She's arrived, unpacked her bags, checked out how comfy the bed is and ordered breakfast :mad: Bloody unwanted guest! Anyway I've had a good cry with my furbabies watching and wondering what the hell I'm doing..and now I'm moving on...kind of:confused::(;)

Oh...again, I'm sorry!:( I wish there was some magic way we could all know when exactly is our time, our month, our chance to become mothers, or to continue our motherhood with another child. It is really so frustrating. I wish you comfort through this time. I'm here.:angel:

So, I've had some very sensitive boobs yesterday with some tingly pain but I also had some AF cramping towards the evening which scared me.:rolleyes: Now, I'm holding off testing due to fear. I thought this would be a NON obsessive cycle, I would relax and not think about it at all!! Well, I'm trying to relax but there's been some big indicators this time that it could have happened, but I just think sometimes that my body is trying to defy me! I know that doesn't make sense!!:jester:
Anyway, now I've decided to wait at least until Wednesday. I've been having 28 day cycles lately, so that would be the 28th day. I think I just want to see if AF is going to come or if I'll even be late. And watch, it'll be late simply because I'm officially obsessing!!:o
Well, I know that Mady, Eva and Airline started this post off with me...Princess you joined us and now we're the only 2 left...I think there are some others from June/July cycles that just started their 2ww and others who have been lurking and reading all of these non sensical posts I keep adding!!:p Thank you for staying here and supporting me. Even you lurkers! It brings me silent comfort knowing someone out there is reading. :)

Oh Airline I am so sorry to hear about AF showing she seems to always show when not wanted.I know the feeling but hang in there your time is coming.

KM I think its best that you wait the longer you wait the better.Sounds like you have some promising signs.I will defently keep praying for you.Good luck and keep us posted.

Pam good luck keep us posted on transfer.Looks like you got some strong embies there.Take care girls and know I am thinking of you all.

Eva :)

Oh Airline, I'm so sorry that AF is here, and you so right!! She is SUCH an unwanted guest! And I bet that not only did she order breakfast, but she wants gourmet jams and exotic fruit. What a pill! But my fingers are crossed for your next cycle! :D Are you going to wait, or stay right on track?

KM, corssing my fingers for you! You sound liek you have some really good events there! I think that holding off and waiting is wise. Sometimes you have to wait unitl you are ready.

I htink I may still be in the beginning of my 2ww!! LOL!! KM, when you get your BFP, I'll be the only one! I thought I O'ed CD 14-15......but Firday (CD19) I think that's when it may have happened. You can read all the gory details on the June July cycles thread....but in case you don't feel like going over.... TMI......I had SO much CM I thought I was wetting myself and a lower backache :) So.... hopefully I've O'ed and I can begin the official 2ww LOL.

Hoping everyone has an amazing day!! :D

Oh! Well, TMI, I keep checking to see if AF is here...but it's just CM!! I can't wait to know either way. Right now though, a sinus infection is wearing me out!:(

KM, that's an awesome sign, lack of AF! :D And Cm is always good :D Feel better soon, sinus infections are so mean. Rest up-- you'll be celebrating your BFP in no time! :D

Thank you girls, hang on in there km...you could still bring home gold!!

Princess started 6th and final round of clomid100mcg. Feeling quite low and introspective since Af arrived. Trying to get myself out of the feeling but have had a few nights on own due DH working so have had some good sob in hand sessions.:(

Anyway, day off together today - he's about to go get his sperm analysis results. '''pray''' I've started writing a diary. It's just to get outta my system everything that goes through my head. These forums are very carthartic, but naturally you don't put everything down...people get bored and tune out!!:(

I wrote a diary 2 other occassions in my life when I felt down and lonely sometimes, and they really work for me.

Saying that I had a dream last night that DH didn't want to have sex with me anymore....he'd gone off me:eek::confused: what does that say about my psyche??

Anway, hopefully Princess and Km will get that BFP you deserve and not rejoin me in my next 2ww - ;)

Everyone have a great day

Airline, I'm so sorry that you're feeling down. Maybe it's emphasized because of the Clomid. 100mcg doesn't seem to be anyone's friend. Sometimes, a few good sob sessions is what you need. You have to let your feelings out, or else it's going to cause stress, even unconciously, and we all know what stress does when TTC. I think starting a diary to get it out of your system is a wonderful idea- I do it myself (on and off) and it's incredibly cathartic. I'm so glad that you know they work for you, based on previous experiences.

As for your dream, I think that it's not a prophetic dream, I think it's one of those dreams that is a manifestation of our fears. Trying so much, of course you're worried, maybe a little deep down, or very much concerned, that DH will get tired of BD. But he won't!! He lvoes you and of course he wants to BD with you, whether it's trying for a baby, or simply making love to his wife. I think that diary writing will certainly help you get out these IF fears and worries and stress. And before you know it, you'll be getting that BFP and this will all be a memory. :D

KM-- How are you? Any more signs today? No sign of AF, I hope!

Airline, I am sorry it ddint work this month, I am wishing you the best of luck and any AF is a new hope for a new beginning. Take it easy.

Km, it sure gets exciting knowing that you have all the prego symptoms. I love it when IF doesnt get its ways. Good luck tomorrow, will be checking in to see your BFP.

Princess, any plans of HPT soon for you?

Babydust,
Mady

Airline I am sorry you are feeling so down but like the others have said writing in your diary should make you feel better. Good luck with your next cyle of clomid.

KM I am glad that AF has not shown and that you have lots of CM it is always a good sign. I pray that you will be posting a BFP very very soon.

Princess my friend how are you holding up? I missed you while I was away. I hope the 2ww is not too bad for you. I have been thinking of you. I read on some thread that is is hot over there, I am soooooo jealous. I hate the winter soooooo much.

Love
Charlene

Hi Char-Char! :D I've been missing you! So far, my 2ww has been going well, I"m really focusing hard on school... I had my first test and got 100% on it! So I guess the distraction is paying off ;) I did have a little "Why me" IF blip today, but I htink I'm doing better. It was really hot yesterday! But we had storms all last night and this morning, so most of the humidity is gone, though the heat is still here. Don't worry, it's already June, your summer is in sight! :D This weather always kind of gets me wistful----thinking of taking my baby for walks around the neighbourhood.....taking them to the park to swing on swings, play in sand and smell the heady scent of lilac in the air. But, it's going to happen, right? And, lilacs will bloom every spring :angel:

Mady, hahahahaha no, I think I've developed a fear of all things peed on. :jester: I can't OPK to save my life, and I'm petrified of an hpt :D But I'm thinking of taking the Benadryl soon. How are you doing?

Princess I am sorry you had an IF blip but I am glad that you are feeling better, your time is coming. Next summer you WILL be walking with your Baby in the neibourhood. You are going be an excellent mommy. I read on another thread that, that silly woman from DH's work is getting to you......well she is not worth your energy, but I know how you feel, I had the same feelings....still do when I hear of people npt looking after their children.

You are right our summer is not too far away even if it does seem to drag on forever.

I hope you have a wonderful day.

I am off to bed soon so i will chat again tomorrow

Love
CHar

Oh Princess, I hate them HPT's too, they never treat me with respect. OPK,s are ok with me, dont really need them though.
Thanks for asking, I am ok, will be natural this cycle, will probably for the next 3 months at least. My RE is not willing to test me further and I am in a bit of a pickle here, as I will have to see another RE that wants to give me this tests. And to get appt to a new RE might take 2 to 3 months, so Im just taking it easy. Will go on vacation this Friday, and when I come back I want to get on a diet, lose 15 lbs and searching for RE. The one I really want to go to is in Dallas, but thats a bit far just for some bloodwork, Im in Florida. Will try it though for an IVF.
Congrats on the good school reports, and Im sorry you got the "why me?" session today. I must get that almost all the time I got out in public and see bad parenting around me.
Take care,
Mady

Hi girls! I'm holding on. No AF yet...slight cramping and some bloating and major tiredness but other than that, nothing to report. And now my boobs are tingling as I type this as if some impending little one is trying to say "I'm here!" Well, I hope that's the case anyway!:D Going to test tomorrow! Will keep you all posted!
Princess, way to go on the test! Hope to hear more good news from you soon!:cool:
Airline, we all have those days. Allow yourself some time and comfort. Hope the clomid works this time around!! :angel:

So, I'm about to go to sleep and having some pinching cramping...for some reason I am scared to death about testing tomorrow.:rolleyes: I have so much anxiety about it. Maybe because I have a feeling it might have worked and I'm so scared of being crushed again if it didn't. I don't remember being this nervous except before my IVF beta(s). Well, I hope I can get some sleep.:yawn: Only a few hours before I know. Big changes will happen either way. Either I'll be pregnant and begin getting ready to be a mommy of 2, or I'll start the overwhelming process of yet another IVF. As my husband said, "it is what it is" which was my mantra when I went through all of this in '06. He's right. There's nothing I can do now...just hope for the best;) but prepare for the worst.:p

Good luck km!! You will be in my prayers tonight that you will get the BFP you deserve :)

Thank you for all your kind words. Princess, you always know how to put a positive spin on things:)

Km.....how'd it go???

DH got his results....first SA was 8million, second was 24 mill. this time 130million
!! Morphology not great though....to our untrained eye.

Well...BFN. :( I just don't get it!! No sign of AF yet. Now, I'm wondering if it could still be too soon??:confused: I thought I would know for sure, and I guess I do but something feels so wrong about that final answer! Am I crazy to get a blood test done? I have heard so many times when these stupid hpts don't work right, but I'm probably not that lucky!!:rolleyes:
I guess I'll just wait it out and if AF doesn't come in the next couple of days, I'll test again.

Sometimes, I don't even know why I have a little hope left when it comes to these months trying naturally. I've been told by two different REs that it is unlikely I could get pg on our own. I guess IVF has been my only option all along...I knew that and accepted it when I went through it before, I just thought maybe it was possible to not have to go through it again.
Well, the good news is, I have lost weight (about 20 pounds since January) and will try to lose more through this month of BCPs and I can enjoy my cruise without stress, and I've been doing acupuncture for months to prepare for it all...so I think I'm ready. I wasn't going to obsess this cycle and that got blown out of the water, but maybe I was just "inventing" things that were never even there to start with. It's okay, I keep trying to tell myself that. But, it's just so hard still.

It's over...I started spotting this morning. I thought as much. So, now I'm looking forward to a nice break this month of preparing my body, and, the possibility of actually becoming pregnant this summer...maybe even the possibility of multiples!:D:angel:

KM; sorry you didn't get a BFP.. but today is a new day and a new cycle and a fresh start.

airline; thats great news about your DH!!!! all those little future babies of yours swimming around there!!!!

OH KM, I'm so sorry that AF has arrived! :( I know we were all clinging to the hope that the hpt was wonky and gave you a false bfn. But you know what? I"m really proud of you that you're keeping your chin up and looking so forward to this month, where you can enjoy the break---have a couple of pina coladas if you want to--- and prepare yourself to get pregnant in the summertime! And you know what, you go ahead and prepare yourself for multiples! :D:D:D:D

Airline-- congrats on all the spermies!! :D That's going to be great, you know there's a shooting chance this time!

Mady-- good luck on your natural cycle, I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you!

Char-- thanks for the words of suppert, they really mean a lot! Hopefully, I will be taking my baby (or babies) around the neighbourhood this time of year. Lilacs bloom every spring ;)

Hoping everyone is haivng an amazing day!! I have a meeting with my scary boss later!! YIKES!! :eek:

Km, I'm so sorry, :( your emotion came through in your post. But as Princess said, you're putting a positive spin on it and well done on your weight loss!!!!!!!:)

Princess, how'd the meeting go with scary boss???

Grrrr, scary boss is evil, he left without saying anyhting so I culdn't have that metting with him. We'll liekly have it sometime today, if only for five minutes. Hopefully he isn't evil and it goes smoothly. Thanks to his and his arrogance, I'm really starting to hate my job----but i"m holding on because I need the money if we're ttc and if this cycle doesn't work out, we're planning to move to Ontario. I like Ontario more because it has a provincial health plan and a LOT more stuff is covered, and I just feel more at home there, even though I"ve only been twice :p :angel:

Well, it's right on time. The first week of my 2ww, I"m always very blasé and focusing on other things. But here I am, at the end of my 2ww and beginning the last bit. And the last bit is where I get crazy insane and start pinching at my nipples to see if they're sore, wondering if that slight pinch in my lower abs in implantation or gas, and basically just driving myself crazy. :jester:

How is everyone doing today? If it's a tough morning, just remember, it's Friday!

Princess,
I'm very new to this message board (just joined today). I'm 6 days into my 17 day wait, and I'm freaking out a little bit. It's good to know someone else somewhere else is in the same wait. Thanks!

Oh princess he's mean:mad: Keep focusing....although who am I kidding...I find it impossible to focus on anything other than...
am i pregnant?????.....:D

Heatheranne, welcome, and good luck:jester:

princess your so funny:D :D. it funny because i do the exact same thing.