My dad has end stage lung cancer & is under hospice home care.
I've noticed that he just started gritting his teeth while resting/sleeping.
Has anyone else experienced this and if so what does it mean please?
My dad says he's not in any pain.
Thanks.

Hi Marie

I am so sorry to read of your situation with Dad. I also lost my Pop to lung cancer and it was a time of turmoil for me.

I think that the gritting of the teeth is not a symptom of the cancer so much as it is to Dad's own thoughts about the cancer. Probably symptomatic of thoughts going on in his subconcious as he sleeps.

I have also had cancer. While I tried to be brave about it, there were many times I woke myself up from a sound sleep with loud moaning and groaning. Often I did not have pain, but was probably trying to come to twerms with the whole thing in my mind.

You know, my Pop was in the final stages of lung cancer as my Mom was being treated for breast cancer. I know that a big worry for him was that he was not taking her through her illness the way he wanted to do and he was worried about the burden on me. I walked into his room one day (he received hospice care in a nursing home) and he was moaning and very agitated in his sleep. I started talking to him and told him things I thought would ease his mind. I told him about insurance things and how all the money was in place and approved for his care as well as my Mom's. I told him how well she was doing and how many people were lined up to help with the daily rides to radiation for her. I told him how I was off from work to help and how my job was being saved for me. I told him how I was enjoying tending to his gardens in which he had spent so much time and effort in for so many years. I tried to address all the things that I knew would probably be weighing on his mind. And then I told him that he had no concerns anymore except to think about himself. His agitation truly calmed down. I really believed that he needed someone to acknowledge and address things that were weighing on him.

My Pop died within a week of that conversation. Perhaps he became more peaceful with the things that were weighing on him and understanding that his responsibilities to my Mom and his worry about me could end, he stopped fighting so hard because he knew it would be okay to let go of his worries. We spent that last week just enjoying each other. We played little hand held games and watched animal shows and sometimes just sat in the room. He was peaceful when he passed.

I certainly was more peaceful at his passing. So maybe, even if he can not respond, Dad would appreciate hearing about the things that might be worrying him. Talk to him about household matters, about finances and assure him that all is okay. Help him settle in his mind his affairs with his family. Then he is free to settle his affairs of himself and his maker.

Marie, as a daughter who was loved greatly, I know that our fathers put a great store in what we say to them. I think you can do a lot to help your Dad at this time with your voice and words. I wish you peace at this really difficult time.

With many good wishes
reach

Thank you reach.;)

Thank you reach.;)
I'm sorry for what you have went through.
My mom is also currently receiving treatment for stage 4 breast cancer,while my dad is battling this horrible lung cancer.
She was told 6 months in Jan.2007.
She's still going strong God bless her.

I've posted somewhere else that when they discovered her cancer-they recommended chemo (after the mastectomy).
That was in July 2005.
She refused and only recieved hormone therapy until February of 2008.She's now on navelbine and herceptin.

Hey There, Marie

We sure have shared some similar things, haven't we? Sometimes I used to shake my head in disbelief at what was happening in my family. Both parents in treatment... and my uncle also. All diagnosed one week after another. Geeze. My Pop and my Uncle passed away within an hour of one another.. kind of went home together, I guess.

Marie, I thought I would never find peace again after that time. I was wrong... it did come again. I just want you to know that it does come. It is pretty horrific to face both parents being so ill at the same time. I will never understand in this life the why of it, but we do survive it and go on living.

Please try to find some rest for yourself. Remember to try and take care of you also in all of this.

It may not be the best of times, but it is a very special time for you and your parents. When I was so ill myself, the time my children spent with me was all the sweeter.

God Bless you
reach

Hello Marie and Reachout..I was browsing around the cancer board, and came upon Marie's post, as well as Reachout's thoughts. My grandaughter, 21 yrs old, passsed away from brain cancer, and now, my daughter, 42, had oral cancer...that C..word is chilling! However, just wanted to say my thoughts are with you, Marie, and your parents. I am so sorry that they are so ill.

I just wanted to comment on the advice Reachout gave to you, Marie. What a wonderful word of advice, and Reachout explained it so well. When my grandaughter was going through her brain cancer......I just continued to talk to her as I always did.....at times I felt I was rambeling....but that was ok......I just kept talking!

Reachout....my very best to you and hope thatyour doing well, and Marie, bless you and parents.

My very best to you both..and prayers, as well.

Judy

Hi Chablis

Thank you for the kind thoughts and care. I am doing well now and remain cancer free... a few scares along the way, but all is well!

My heart breaks with yours on the loss of your granddaughter. Such a short life. There is no understanding of it in this life, is there? It is pretty obvious you loved her very much and cared... I know the sound of your voice was a comfort to her. And your daughter now.... gee, Chablis, so much on one plate. I wish you many, many blessings. God seems to have a special purpose for you... I am not sure what or why, but if He is allowing these things to enter your life, there is certainly a purpose.

All best wishes to your daughter in her battle. And all best wishes in your riole as a caregiver. Both are hard battles.

TO MARIE

You continue to be in my thoughts. None of us would ever choose to be in the position of having two gravely ill parents at the same time. As I wrote to Chablis, though, God is very aware of the situation. He obviously chose well when he choe to have you be the daughter in this.

Blesssings
reach

Chablis,I am so very sorry for your daughter being sick.There are no words to describle what you are going through I'm sure.It has to be one of the worst things-if not the worst,to go through-God forbid.
I wish you & lots of luck & hope and I'm also so very sorry for what you have been through with your grand daughter.
May she rest in peace.Thank you for stepping out of
your circumstance to help me.How very kind of you.

Reach,thank you so much again for your words of advice and comfort.
I'm very grateful for having found this board and those on it.
It is giving me strength & understanding.
It's very nice to be able to communicate with others who know exactly what you are going through because they have been there.
Thank you all so much.