mickeymad11
07-31-2008, 07:44 PM
:)
For years i was diagnosed as having clinical depression and with therapy and anti-depressants i felt myself getting a lot better, however for a while now (approx 18 months) i have been having extreme highs and extreme lows, not sleeping very well, probably getting by on 2 hours a night and feeling full of energy after such a short rest. Every few weeks or so my body would literally shut down, i couldnt function, constantly tired, irritable, aggitated and wanted to sleep forever.
The highs were excellent, i felt like i could do anything, I would sign myself up for loads of courses at night school and would fill my diary with events i would never normally dream of doing, I found i was full of energy and could feel the adrenaline rushing though my body, my house was spotless, i was so organised with everything, people used to tell me i would chat for england and rarely came up for breath and constantly jumped from one subject to another, my concentration was terrible, my sex drive went through the roof, poor hubby found it hard to keep up lol. i felt like i could take on the world and that everything and everyone was wonderful. I would get overwhelming urges to stand up in school assembly and do a speech about how wonderful life was, a few weeks ago i did actually stand up but luckily my rational side kicked in and i just sat back down (how embarrassing).
I have found though that the highs also had a down side as I found i was doing things that were really out of character for me, if you read my previous thread about me being infactuated with my daughers teacher (this is just one of the embarrassing moments i have had) it all seems to make sense why i was doing things out of character.
The lows were terrible, i couldnt function, found it hard to relate to my kids and close family, couldnt stand the thought of anyone touching me and would even get very irritated when my hubby or my kids would hug me, felt very detached from everything and everyone and found that i ended up cancelling all the courses i had arranged when i was on a high as the thought of doing them all frightened the living daylights out of me. i would literally find it impossible to do anything that i could do when i was on a high.
Sorry for babbling on but i would be interested to hear from anyone who has had similar symptons? and how do you learn to cope with this illness? Will i be on meds for life? Have i really got bipolar as for years i was mis-diagnosed?So many questions but unfortunately i was at a low point when visiting my specialist and didnt ask many questions.
Thank you for taking the time to read this and if you havent fallen asleep with boredom ha ha then i would love to hear of your experiences.
mickeymad11 :)
For years i was diagnosed as having clinical depression and with therapy and anti-depressants i felt myself getting a lot better, however for a while now (approx 18 months) i have been having extreme highs and extreme lows, not sleeping very well, probably getting by on 2 hours a night and feeling full of energy after such a short rest. Every few weeks or so my body would literally shut down, i couldnt function, constantly tired, irritable, aggitated and wanted to sleep forever.
The highs were excellent, i felt like i could do anything, I would sign myself up for loads of courses at night school and would fill my diary with events i would never normally dream of doing, I found i was full of energy and could feel the adrenaline rushing though my body, my house was spotless, i was so organised with everything, people used to tell me i would chat for england and rarely came up for breath and constantly jumped from one subject to another, my concentration was terrible, my sex drive went through the roof, poor hubby found it hard to keep up lol. i felt like i could take on the world and that everything and everyone was wonderful. I would get overwhelming urges to stand up in school assembly and do a speech about how wonderful life was, a few weeks ago i did actually stand up but luckily my rational side kicked in and i just sat back down (how embarrassing).
I have found though that the highs also had a down side as I found i was doing things that were really out of character for me, if you read my previous thread about me being infactuated with my daughers teacher (this is just one of the embarrassing moments i have had) it all seems to make sense why i was doing things out of character.
The lows were terrible, i couldnt function, found it hard to relate to my kids and close family, couldnt stand the thought of anyone touching me and would even get very irritated when my hubby or my kids would hug me, felt very detached from everything and everyone and found that i ended up cancelling all the courses i had arranged when i was on a high as the thought of doing them all frightened the living daylights out of me. i would literally find it impossible to do anything that i could do when i was on a high.
Sorry for babbling on but i would be interested to hear from anyone who has had similar symptons? and how do you learn to cope with this illness? Will i be on meds for life? Have i really got bipolar as for years i was mis-diagnosed?So many questions but unfortunately i was at a low point when visiting my specialist and didnt ask many questions.
Thank you for taking the time to read this and if you havent fallen asleep with boredom ha ha then i would love to hear of your experiences.
mickeymad11 :)
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CarenR
08-01-2008, 11:57 AM
welcome to the board..... I have Bipolar 1, and most likely you should stay on medications for years..... Bipolar get s worse as we age if we dont take the meds... so very important to stay on your meds....
I cope with Bipolar by praying, God helps me.
please come back often to the boards. Ask your dr. all the questions you can. next visit ... It is important to stay informed..
hugs, caren
I cope with Bipolar by praying, God helps me.
please come back often to the boards. Ask your dr. all the questions you can. next visit ... It is important to stay informed..
hugs, caren
tish25
08-01-2008, 04:25 PM
I can relate. I was diagnosed with depression after the birth of my first child was born. I was on meds for the most part until this last year when I realized no medication was helping me get through the day. During my high I was working full time, had five children to care for(hubby was in Iraq), and working to get my masters done. I was coming down at the time I had to finish my thesis. I almost didn't graduate. It's been almost a year. I've been in and out of the hospital two times. I tried to commit suicide a couple of times during the year. I think things are getting better. Right now I'm on so much medication everyone thinks I should be completely knocked out, but it's barely keeping me afloat.
I don't know if that helps, but it's nice to know we're not alone. This is difficult for my family and I worry about how they get through this. I worry that our life is spun around this illness and it gets old. Oh yeah, and the weight effects totally suck! Sorry for the language. At any rate, good luck!
I don't know if that helps, but it's nice to know we're not alone. This is difficult for my family and I worry about how they get through this. I worry that our life is spun around this illness and it gets old. Oh yeah, and the weight effects totally suck! Sorry for the language. At any rate, good luck!
mickeymad11
08-01-2008, 07:10 PM
;)
Thank you both so much for replying, its nice to know im not on my own, its a strange illness isnt it?, i wonder what causes it?, my doctor told me that it is very common for women who have had post-natal depression, it can then progress to bi-polar. Like i said for years i was diagnosed with clinical depression, i ran my own depression group and was quite informed with it all, then they tell me i have something different, is there much of a difference betwwen depression and bi-polar? (apart from the obvious highs that you dont get with depression) - its a strange illness isnt it, im trying to do as much research about it at the moment and am grateful for any support people have given me. Can i ask - what is Bi-polar 1? are their many stages in Bi-polar?
Thank you once again xx :)
Thank you both so much for replying, its nice to know im not on my own, its a strange illness isnt it?, i wonder what causes it?, my doctor told me that it is very common for women who have had post-natal depression, it can then progress to bi-polar. Like i said for years i was diagnosed with clinical depression, i ran my own depression group and was quite informed with it all, then they tell me i have something different, is there much of a difference betwwen depression and bi-polar? (apart from the obvious highs that you dont get with depression) - its a strange illness isnt it, im trying to do as much research about it at the moment and am grateful for any support people have given me. Can i ask - what is Bi-polar 1? are their many stages in Bi-polar?
Thank you once again xx :)
seaturtle
08-01-2008, 11:42 PM
HI,
It's pretty common for us to be diagnosed just w/depression for years until someone finally gets the bp. Yes, your symptoms sound familiar.
Have you been formally diagnosed with bp? I'd suggest you get a thorough evaluation, if not. And are you still on an anti-depressant without a mood stabilizer? That can make things worse.
Just IMHO, medical help (medication) is the first place to get help. I speak just from my experience that until just recently, when I was finally put on Lamictal, a mood stabilizer, I wasn't able to make much progress at all, despite years of therapy.
You can work this one out. I'm glad you're aware of your cycles now.
It's pretty common for us to be diagnosed just w/depression for years until someone finally gets the bp. Yes, your symptoms sound familiar.
Have you been formally diagnosed with bp? I'd suggest you get a thorough evaluation, if not. And are you still on an anti-depressant without a mood stabilizer? That can make things worse.
Just IMHO, medical help (medication) is the first place to get help. I speak just from my experience that until just recently, when I was finally put on Lamictal, a mood stabilizer, I wasn't able to make much progress at all, despite years of therapy.
You can work this one out. I'm glad you're aware of your cycles now.
mickeymad11
08-02-2008, 04:38 AM
hiya
yes i have been diagnosed with BP and am on mood stabalisers twice a day plus anti depressants, plus another one to control the extreme highs, i feel a lot calmer at the moment so think tabs are starting take affect.
yes i have been diagnosed with BP and am on mood stabalisers twice a day plus anti depressants, plus another one to control the extreme highs, i feel a lot calmer at the moment so think tabs are starting take affect.
MouseOnMars
08-02-2008, 10:44 AM
I was only officially diagnosed last summer but had suspected I had some form of BP as my mother was clinically diagnosed in the 70s as "manic depressive" and she spent much of my childhood struggling with BP. I was always told that I had depression and I knew that I did but I also knew that I had these manic periods. I have BPII, my cycles are generally far apart and I am mostly depressed. When I do have the manic period, I do feel extremely creative and on top of the world. I actually love those times now but when I first started having them "severely", I didn't know that all the "out of character" things that I was doing was because of my illness. I quit a job, sold a house, left a long-term partner in a rush (within a 2 month period) so that I could move to the UK and live and work there.
I happened to marry someone in a quick rush and found out after we were married that he was an alcoholic. Nobody, not even my therapist who I was seeing for depression at the time said, "STOP! What is going on with you?" All I can figure is I went from a really bad depressive state into a superwoman state and they all thought I had "snapped out" of my depression. I am angry now that my therapist at the time didn't realize what was going on. Anyway, I think making sure that you remember that you have this illness is a good way to temper your behavior (i.e. stop and think to yourself, "Is this me doing something positive for myself or am I doing something out of character that will hurt me in the long run?"). Take care!
I happened to marry someone in a quick rush and found out after we were married that he was an alcoholic. Nobody, not even my therapist who I was seeing for depression at the time said, "STOP! What is going on with you?" All I can figure is I went from a really bad depressive state into a superwoman state and they all thought I had "snapped out" of my depression. I am angry now that my therapist at the time didn't realize what was going on. Anyway, I think making sure that you remember that you have this illness is a good way to temper your behavior (i.e. stop and think to yourself, "Is this me doing something positive for myself or am I doing something out of character that will hurt me in the long run?"). Take care!
seaugust2001
08-06-2008, 12:10 AM
I was diagnosed with Bipolar back in 2003. I was first diagnosed with clinical depression back in 1997. In 2003 I was put in the hospital where they diagnosed me. I was put on lamictal and zyprexa. I have type 2 bipolar. Its not as severe but I know what it is like to have very eratic mood swings. There have been times where I can stay up for days and then there are times where I can cry for days.
ced33
08-06-2008, 12:54 AM
Welcome. There is a wealth of info on this board. I too was diagnosed with depression, anxiety, and panic attacks until my general doctor caught the bp one day. I never had full blown mania but definitely suffered hypomania (overspending, being sexually promisciuous (sp), erratic behavior after drinking (ie: opening a car door while a friend was driving on a highway, just for the hell of it), rage (mostly inward to myself) along with the low depression lows. Sorry for the novel but in a nutshell yes I can relate to your post.