Hi ladies! I can't believe how good I feel right now- considering I'm not pregnant. I think I let it all go Friday night and all day yesterday, anticipating the bad news today.

So the nurse calls me and says, "Hi Lisa, I'm sorry to say.." and I stop her and say, "its negative, I know."
So we start talking about increasing my meds and getting more aggressive and I ask her my endo and that I think I now have a paratubal cyst on my right side like I had on my left and she says that my ultrasound does indicate that.

Anyhoo, long story short, she suggests another surgery to get the endo and cysts off and I'm elated! I'm so happy to get this taken care and to be drug free at least for another month. I feel very much at peace with taking these steps and feel that I'm only increasing my chances of a pregnancy by getting my endo lazored off - yet again. http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gifThe most important thing is that I'm smiling!

I also feel very industrious because to help ease my heavy heart, I swung by Target this morning and stocked up stuff and splurged on an "Etarge" (I call it a fancy space saver for behind the toilet) and some other really neat accessories (candles and plants) for my bathroom. not to mention some new fluffy sage rugs! And can you believe that I'm actually putting the etarge thingie together myself! YAY - DH will be so proud when he comes home tomorrow.

I just want to extend a hug to all of you who've been so supportive of me during my 2ww waiting - not to mention before that too. I'm psyched to get cleaned up inside and even more psyched to be able to try again with an endo-free me. (at least until I get preggers)

http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/heart.gif

I'm sorry about the BFN Lisa, but I am so happy to hear about your positive attitude. I redid my step-daughter's bathroom two months ago, and what a difference it makes! We even put a new countertop on, and replaced the blinds, and repainted, etc. We did it all in fishies, and it looks so cute. It's always fun to do something like that to the house, and it will make you feel better.

I am glad that you are going to have the proceedures you need to help your chances. Actually, I agree (even though this is just opinion and not medical advice) in increasing your meds. I know a lot of women get pg with just one follicule, but lets face it, our chances improve when there is more. I had one follicule every month for ever, then when we went to injectibles, it was the first time I had three follies, and well, the rest is history!

Keep up the good attitude, and I will continue wishing well thoughts for you. Take care, have a nice weekend http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif

You are an amazing woman!!! I am sorry about the negative but am proud of the way you are handling it. You are a much stronger person than I will ever be. Go get that sh** lasered off and then get pumped up with meds. I bet you get preg. right away with twins. God is just testing you right now and hopefully he now sees that you can handle anything. Glad you hit target. I love that store. I buy all of my dog bones and cat toys there because they are cheaper than petsmart. Glad you are doing ok and ready to move on. Splurge tonight and drink a nice bottle of wine and order something in. Then tomorrow go get a pint of Ben and Jerry's ice cream and eat the whole thing. You deserve it!!! Enjoy the rest of the weekend and I will check on you later!!

Thanks so much Tracy and Jody! That makes me good to hear you ladies say that to me. I feel really great about things and am so proud of myself for having such a positive outlook.

That's right! I'm gonna get that nasy sh** lazored off and then I'm getting twins! Plus my bathroom is beautimous! Ginger (our lab) got new bones at target as a surprise today and Jerry (our tabby) got a cool catnip toy. http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif

I'm enjoying a brewskie now and will dip into some red wine tonight! http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/dance.gif

Awww, you buy your babies toys too!! My dog actually knows the target bag and goes crazy when I come in because he knows he is getting a new bone. I am trying to talk DH into going shopping this afternoon. Bombay is having a big sale. I love that store too. Enjoy your beer!!

Oh Momma**I'm so sorry.
I love that positive attitude though. Go get that lap done, so nothing is in your way!
You go girl! Shop until you drop! My little babies are so spoiled too! (2 little shih tzu's). In fact I'm sitting here typing this and there asleep in their beds beside me.
Things will happen for you. You enjoy your month off and drink a brewskie for me!

I spoil my babies rotten, Tracy! Hope you go to Bombay! I love decorating and I'm so psyched about my new bathroom! Its so purrrrdy!

Sunny - Girl, I am gonna get that lap done and I'm going to enjoy my month off as much as I can! I'm gonna have as much java as I want, drink as many glasses of wine and beer and girlie fru-fru drinks as I want, and I'm going to exercise as much as I want and just RELAX! this may be my last month for about 9 months to do that!!

You give your lil' ones a pat for me and rub that belly!

Momma sorry about the BFN. But I am really glad you are in such high spirits about everything. You are a very strong lady. Enjoy your month off. I just redid my bathroom almost finished with it. Have a great day.

Kelly

Lisa,

Just checked in today hoping to see a BFP for you. Sorry to see it didn't work out for you. But oh so happy to see you are OK. Sounds like you have a solid plan in place and are moving towards that BFP.

Yes, a month off from drugs will do you wonders. I know I feel 100 times better. Almost afraid to take that darn clomid again. I am on cd 18 now and dh was out of town during my fertile time. It is kinda nice not to have to worry about wether I am or not. I will be doing my next and 3rd round of IUI with clomid in June when AF shows around the 6th or 7th. If that fails I too will have surgery to remove a polyp in my uterus and then I will start IVF.
Good luck to you and hope to see you on the board with a BFP after your surgery.
Big ((((HUG))) to you.
Tina

Hey Momma,
I am so sorry about your BFN. I did not have a chance to check the messages until today, which just about killed me. You sound like you are excited about your new plan, which does sound great. Just think with your endo gone, your womb will be even more ready to support a baby or babies. I always try to visualize my womb being healthy and ripe.
I am so glad to hear everyone else loves their pets like i do. My dog, Berkeley, loves the Target bag too. She has actually gotten her new toys out of the bag while I have been unloading the car. I think we are so blessed to have animals so that we can unload our tears and love on them. Berkeley is better than any therapist!
I will be thinking of you Momma. Keep us posted!
Becca

Momma, I am sorry to hear the official news. I am glad that you went out shopping, it makes me feel better too. I am glad that you are going to have the procedeures done. Will definately increase your chances of BFP! Hang in there http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif You are such a sweet and caring lady. You are always the first one to post to a response and be there for all that are hurting and those who are celebrating! Love ya girl, you are in my prayers http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/angel.gif

Momma-
Really sorry to hear about the BFN. I'm glad that you are getting out and doing some things instead of focusing just on that. Shopping is great. It always makes me feel so much better. Hope you can move forward quickly with your plan and toward a + result soon. You deserve it!!

Kelly, Tina, Becca, MaryAnn & Octobergirl - you girls are wonderful! I'm truly blessed to have the support I've found from this board. I had the most incredible day! I can't stop going in my bathroom http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/wink.gif its just beautiful. My whole house smells yummy with the candles I bought today and I'm so looking foward to my DH coming home to me tomorrow. http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif I enjoyed a bottle of Pinot Noir with a friend tonight and sat with her son and helped him do homework. That was fun!

Wishing you all the best! And BIG HUGS to each of you. http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/heart.gif

Momma,

Glad you are feeling better. I guess I got a little mixed up on the posts b/c I thought the other post was for toady and that you wouldn't get blood test until tomorrow. Anyway, I am glad that you have such a positive outlook on things and it sounds like ou have a really good and informative doctor.

Hopefully this cycle will be the one and that you mini vacation adn everything timing will be perfect for your cycle.

I think my AF may be coming early this month ~ no cramps or anything, just horrible mood swings and craving sugar (not good since I am supposed to be on a diabetic diet).

Keep us posted,

Amy

((((((( MOMMA )))))))

Sorry about that BFN . you are TRULY INSPIRATIONAL !!!!! what an amazing attitude you have ! Let us know when that lap is ! your shopping trip sounds great !
Old Flo

OOO MOMMMMA!!! F F F!! Keeep up the good attitude! Ya need that strong heart to get through this process! I wish ya better LUCK next time around! Ya off for a month ya say? Is surgery immediate?...As always, Your are in my prayers! CLOT DUST for ya to speeed ya along!
http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/heart.gifMare

Great attitude momma. Good to see your in good spirits. I wanted to ask you something in regards to your endo. My ivf clinic did some special blood work on me cuz of my endo. They said my blood work showed they I have a tendancy for white blood cells to clot because I have so much endo. So the blood cells are trying to attack they endo. They are going to give me blood thinning med. They said that my embies might never make it to implantation because the white blood cells presently attacking to endo could attack my embies. I wonder if that is like part of they prob with you iui.

It is great you will have another lap. That will increase your chances greatly. Is your endo giving you much pain? When is you surgery?

Amy, Lisa, Mare & Boundi - you women are so wonderful, thanks so much for your words - they truly keep me strong through this! AF made her debut right after DH and I bd.. http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif I'm glad she waited, he's a bit skittish of her appearance.

I will let you know as soon as i know about my surgery! Hopefully I will know tomorrow - nurse said she'd speak with my RE and then give me a call. I would absolutely LOVE it if we did it before our vacation in June - that would be awesome. Last time I had my lap, we flew to Key West about a week later.

Boundi - my endo brings me great pain, but I've really gotten used to it. A friend had to actually tell me that it was not normal to cramp all of the time. I can honestly say that there is not one day that goes by that I don't have a dull burning ache in my pelvis. DH and I had a serious conversation about me getting things taken care of once we do have our baby, he hates to see me in so much pain. And I'm sometimes afraid to bd because of the pain I feel most of the time during it. But who knows if a surgery can take away the endo? I've been reading things now that say that even if you don't have your uterus, you can still get endo. http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/frown.gif I'll have to talk to the RE and see what he says about it.

Stupid a** endo.

Momma- You are an incredibly strong person, I need to get some of your positive thinking!! They will get that endo cleaned up and then you will have your twins http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif God bless and good luck you have been very supportive to me and many other women on this board. Keep your chin up and will see if I will be joining you for a long, tall cold one this evening or not

Thanks Jordansmom - but you ain't joining me for anything but a cold glass of milk! Then in about 9 months, when you say "join me for a drink" - I'll say in about 2 months!

http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif Just said a prayer for you.

Haven't you had a lap before? My endo got soooo much better after a lap and some b/c pills. I guess hormones were going all crazy. My obgyn said I must have had it since I started AF as young girl. Sex was very painful too.

Yep, I had a lap but it came back - I guess. When I had a pap done, the ob dr could feel it.

I hope that if they get it all this time, it doesn't mean that I"m still doomed.

MOMMA!
I am back from my little "vaca" and I am so sorry for your BFN>>> god...that sucks........I can see you are hanging in there..and doign a great job of staying on top of it all and keeping your chin up! I am reading this board and see alot of sad news here!We need some positives!!! I bet we will get a bunch of BFP all at once in the comin g months!!!!!!!!!Stay focused and your time will come... I know it will !!!! hugs and I am passing you a "ball" of sunshine your way http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gifAnne

Thanks Anne! I appreciate that. BBs hurt, huh?! Good for you!!! You'll be our next BFP! And Jordansmom too! And everyone else!!!