rugbymoose99
11-02-2008, 01:34 AM
I'm a gay man in a monogomous long term relationship (4 years). My partner and I have not strayed, but I was recently diagnosed with HSV 2 (I've known I had HSV 1 since I was a teenager). I went through an extremely stressful time (the violent death of both my parents, a car accident, and an IRS audit all within a 4 month time frame), and the doctor contends that I have likely carried this for several years, and I am just now breaking out given my stress levels. I tend to agree since my partner tests negative and we've both been monogomous.
That said, I am having a hard time locating hard data on the increased risk of HIV infection I face now--or rather, that I apparently have faced for some time. Does anyone know where I can find this kind of data?
I know I'll likely take some heat for this, but my partner and I have had unprotected sex for the bulk of our relationship since we're not with anyone else. He's not gotten the HSV and both of us have tested HIV- (again, for 4 years--we were tested early on the relationship and continue to do it every six months). Given that, I'd like to know hard numbers on my increased risk of HIV as a receptive partner both with and without protection.
Any ideas where I can find the data? Thanks.
That said, I am having a hard time locating hard data on the increased risk of HIV infection I face now--or rather, that I apparently have faced for some time. Does anyone know where I can find this kind of data?
I know I'll likely take some heat for this, but my partner and I have had unprotected sex for the bulk of our relationship since we're not with anyone else. He's not gotten the HSV and both of us have tested HIV- (again, for 4 years--we were tested early on the relationship and continue to do it every six months). Given that, I'd like to know hard numbers on my increased risk of HIV as a receptive partner both with and without protection.
Any ideas where I can find the data? Thanks.
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Truthseek
11-02-2008, 08:50 AM
I would think any of the AIDS organizations would be able to point you in the right direction to recent medical studies. Have you tried your doctor or an infectious disease doctor? A lot of the medical blogs require you to be a doctor or have a paid subscription to access.
I know from my own personal research/reading when I first found out I had HSV2 that the risk increases significantly for gay couples and heterosexual couples. The New England Journal of medicine had an article in I believe March of this year that said treating HSV2 had little effect on preventing subsequent HIV infection. :-(
But if you are monogamous and both of you have tested HIV negative then right now you have no risk. Are you just concerned for future risk outside of this relationship?
I know from my own personal research/reading when I first found out I had HSV2 that the risk increases significantly for gay couples and heterosexual couples. The New England Journal of medicine had an article in I believe March of this year that said treating HSV2 had little effect on preventing subsequent HIV infection. :-(
But if you are monogamous and both of you have tested HIV negative then right now you have no risk. Are you just concerned for future risk outside of this relationship?
rugbymoose99
11-02-2008, 02:20 PM
Thanks for your reply. I am concerned mainly about what would happen if my partner and I split up (odd, I know, we don't have any problems but need to be pragmatic here about the success of all long term relationships, both gay and straight). If he gets HSV 2 from me, am I cursing him with something that's going to endanger his life forever? Same is true for me--what am I in for if we do break up? I guess maybe this is pragmatism mixed with a bit of depression, since I kind of feel like damaged goods--and I don't want him to feel the same way, especially if the cause is me.
Thanks for the compassion in your response.
I think talking to my doctor (or finding one who knows about this kinds of thing) is a wise idea. This is all new to me, and am working with my dermatologist now about the HSV, and need a more informed opinion than I think he can offer me. Infectious disease or a GP who also has an HIV practice (I am on the waiting list for a doc like this) would likely be a sound place to start.
Thanks for the compassion in your response.
I think talking to my doctor (or finding one who knows about this kinds of thing) is a wise idea. This is all new to me, and am working with my dermatologist now about the HSV, and need a more informed opinion than I think he can offer me. Infectious disease or a GP who also has an HIV practice (I am on the waiting list for a doc like this) would likely be a sound place to start.
Truthseek
11-02-2008, 09:48 PM
I understand your thinking. Lots of us think we are damaged goods but we are not. I also fear my 'next' relationship. If there will ever be one. Who would want someone with the big red "H". Sigh.
Good luck with the doctor(s).
Good luck with the doctor(s).
rugbymoose99
11-03-2008, 12:48 AM
Thanks again. I feel less alone. And I did chuckle at your reference to "The Scarlet Letter," so thanks for helping me find the levity in this situation. I guess we'll have to bank on our wits and charm for the next relationship. Good luck to you, but doubt you'll need it.