Hallo Gals

Well, I was right about believing AF was about to appear.

Day 12 of 2ww after my first IVF attempt, I'd got some signs, then just as I was doing the test last night my AF flooded all over the bloody HPT stick.

Much wailing and howling then followed, but today I feel LOADS better, apart from looking like an alien with my puffy eyes!

It's strange, I feel almost like a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders. My DH and I have had a terrible year, he's been starting up a new business and ended up on anti depressants because of the stress and we've both been going through all the fertility investigations and treatments, culminating in IVF.

I now know that I can reclaim back my body and my life. DH's business has started to take off and I'm looking forward to the first stress-free period we've had in twelve months.

So it's break time from all of this fertility stuff. I've got one little embie on ice and if that survives, I'll get it popped back in at some point. Not sure when yet. Can't think about all that again for a while.

So sending the most huge amount of baby dust all your ways and hoping by the time I return none of you are here cos you've all become PG!!

Lots of love and hugs from your UK friend.
Clare
xxx

Sorry to hear about AF.

Sounds like you're coping well with it this morning. I agree that sometimes it's better to "reclaim" yourself so that you can continue on at some point. You've got to take care of yourself first and hope that the rest falls into place.

Take care and hope to see you checking in from time to time http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif

Denise

Hi Clare,

so sorry to hear about AF showing up. You know that we all feel your pain and are crying and screaming with you!! It is really sad when you are really optimistic and try and stay positive and it ends in a negative. It makes you think why bother?? I am glad to see that you have already moved on and are thinking towards the future. I hope they have enough alcohol for you and dh at the wedding tomorrow-lol! You guys deserve a good drunk. Take time to heal and LIVE (what the hell is that right?) and enjoy the summer. You know when the time is right you can get that little embie who is waiting for you! You will know when the time is right. ((HUGS)) to you Clare! I am proud of you for even doing IVF and staying positive right to the end. Have a smashing weekend and let us know how much fun you have. Take care!

p.s. glad to hear dh's business is doing better. My dh has his own business also and went to the Dr. yesterday for stress........I wonder if the money is worth it sometimes??

Sorry to hear about AF coming, but it sounds like you have a great outlook this morning, and you're right, when you are ready to jump in again that embie will be waiting. It is so easy to forget what "living" really is when you're in the middle of all of this. Even though it is very worth it, you and DH deserve some good r&r, and spontaneous whoopie! http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/smile.gif Good luck, and enjoy ALL the alcohol at the wedding! Have a few for me! http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/heart.gif

Clare,

Big ((hug)) - sorry to hear about AF! Sounds like you are handling it well though. It is always great when you can find a positive way to look at things.

Enjoy your break and keep in touch with us.

http://www.healthboards.com/ubb/heart.gif TAZ

Clare - you are so strong! I am so terribly sorry to hear of your loss... I know this is an emotional time for you and dh after putting your life into this procedure - You will be in my prayers! Best of luck to you and don't forget that your time is going to come too! jen

Clare.
Sorry to hear about AF .
You sound like a very brave + courageous woman . I admire your spirit + positive attitude . Good Luck to you !

hi L. I am very sorry about the bfn. You know I have been rooting for you. IVF is soooo hard and soooo long, it really hurts for it to end this way. You've really hung in there. I was really praying you would receive bfp. I am glad to see you are so positive about it. Keep you head up. Have fun at the wedding and have a drink or two for me too.

Claire, I am so sorry to hear of your BFN. You sound like you have a plan and that is great. I wish you the best of luck.
Tina

Dear Gals

I'd just like to thank you all for your messages of support. Nobody can understand how this feels, apart from us women (and men) who go through it and have to live with it on a day to day basis. So your support has tremendous meaning.

As I mentioned before, I'm now going to take a break from all of this - for as long as it takes for me to feel strong again. Right now I can't even bring myself to ring the hospital and let them know that the IVF failed. I'm wondering if I leave it long enough, will they actually call me?!

Anyhow, thanks again and HUGE amounts of luck and hugs to you all.

Clare
xxxxxx

[This message has been edited by lcsucr (edited 06-16-2003).]