My daughter is also 12 and diagnosed with down syndrome and autism. She was about 7 when we were finally told she had autism. She kept banging her head with her hands and screaming with certain sounds. She was almost potty trained about 2 years ago and then all of a sudden that went out the window. She was not hearing anything for a while and now she hears but to what extent I don't know cause she does not talk either. She has been pulling her hair out and scratching her neck in the same place over and over again till it look like a bloody mess. I am to my wits end also trying to find an answer to help her. We tried putting bandades on but she tears them off and the only thing I can do is hold her hands til she finish her meltdown but she is so strong it is very tiring and she gets mad that you hold her hands so she will try to pull my hair needless to say it hurt like I don't know what. Hopefully we can find some answers somewhere. Also check with your insurance to see if the cover medical equipment. I got a stroller thats designed for older special needs children and it will be a blessing to you when you have to go places. I know about the falling out and having a hard time trying to pick your child up and they are not aware of the dangers around them. Check with your insurance company and a medical supply company. Our insurance paid 1200 and I had to pay 300. It is well worth it. May God bless you and every other mom out there trying to find answers. I know the answers are out there somewhere. Take care and keep the faith and just know that you are not alone.